Dive Bar Dipsy-Doodle

Dive Bar Dipsy-Doodle

(Teasing, Exposing and Some)

Please be nice and understanding because this is my first submission.

I don't like the term "hot wife". I am a happy wife who loves to have fun flashing, accidentally exposing herself, and teasing. Needless to say, I like to be "looked at" and watched.

My husband and I are both early 50's and we keep ourselves in shape with a regular exercise regime, yoga and a healthy sex life. We have been married for 25 years and our only child has completed University and has started life away from home.

To put things in perspective.... I am a tall 5'10", 135 lbs soaking wet with long dark brown hair. My boobs are 34B with small pinkish light brown areolas about the size of a loonie and corresponding nipples that still get terribly hard when its cold or I am appropriately aroused. My chest is part of my workout routine so still pretty firm for my age. If I am lying down, they actually look firmer. I wear a size small and have had laser hair removal so all of my intimate parts are bare and smooth as silk. I think I am still considered attractive. I also have sensitive, long pussy lips and a very sensitive clit. When I am at home its conservative dresses, one-piece bathing suits and athleisure wear, but when I am away on vacation (usually sunny destination), I lose the bra and panties and its crop tops, MS bikinis and short skirts.

I am a tall 5'10", 135 lbs soaking wet with long dark brown hair. My boobs are 34B with small pink areolas about the size of a nickel and corresponding nipples that still get terribly hard when its cold or I am appropriately aroused. I wear a size small and have had laser hair removal so all of my intimate parts are bare and smooth as silk. I think I am still considered attractive, and I have heard many "milf" comments when out and about, particularly in bars and restaurants. I also have sensitive, long pussy lips and a very sensitive clit. When I am at home its conservative dresses, one-piece bathing suits and athleisure wear, but when I am away on vacation (usually sunny destination), I lose the bra and panties and its crop tops, MS bikinis and short skirts.

Over the last several years my husband has grown to love me to flashing and exposing myself, mainly on vacation. We have done the nude for room service / hotel repairman thing and had great sex afterwards. Twice we have been to bars where I play the flirt and let a selected gentleman fondle me and get his fingers up my short skirt to my panties while I rub him through his pants. We have not progressed yet to where the bar guys I flirt with get more than a feel of my boobs and pussy through my skimpy lingerie.

That all changed recently.

I think as we age, we get bolder and throw more caution to the wind. I have found that I am way less shy now, not that I really was before. I also think we grow to be mor adventurous. So one night at dinner on vacation my husband and I discussed turning the notch up a bit on the teasing escapades, but we didn't act on it until we retuned home. We live north of the 49^th parallel and it was approaching labour day when we decided to act on what we had discussed in Mexico.

This is very accurate depiction of how things played out. For the most part this is what happened. I added some detail to 1 of the "scenes" for your reading pleasure, and just in case I ever decide to publish this as a book online LOL!

We wanted to be more than an hour away from where we live, so we drove towards the hills. We found a little town that I think was just beyond the county line. Probably close to a 90-minute drive. It had the perfect stereotypical small town dive bar. Place looked small, with a parking lot at the side and a makeshift patio at the back. Might have been a house in the day because there were several windows on either side and a single door on the front. It was probably about 9:30pm when we pulled into the parking lot.

We parked near the main door and went inside. On the drive up, we had decided that the plan would be for me to appear relatively tipsy already. The place was small inside with the typical layout. There was a bar with bartender along one side, a few tables scattered here and there and across from the bar was one of those long but narrow stand up tables with a few tall bar stools with back rests. We sat there by ourselves facing the bar. The only TV was behind the bar, so I think where we sat was the prime place to watch sports. There were tables off to both sides and 2 of the tables were occupied. One group of 3 guys probably late twenties or early 30's and another table of 3 guys. 2 of these guys were older, probably early 50's and the other looked like mid 40's. They all looked in pretty decent shape and were dressed in jeans and shirts - not designed stuff, but not redneck either. We were thinking typical small town and it's Saturday night and these poor guys have nothing better to do! The table of 3 older guys clearly noticed us when we walked in, and I am pretty sure their eyes followed our movements, or at least mine. Their table was to the left and a little behind us, so after we sat down, we really couldn't see them. I can act the happy drunk well. I wore 3-inch heels, so it was also easy to appear unstable on my feet.

Soon after we arrived, a couple of women came in and 2 of younger guys finished their beers and left with them. The third joined the other table of three to make it a foursome. When he carried a chair over to join the other table, he was clearly checking me out and he was not being shy about it. So, it was now my hubby and me, 4 patrons and the bartender. It looked like WWE was playing on the TV.

Eventually, the bartender came over, looked me up and down. Geez have these guys ever seen a woman before! H finally asked us if we wanted a drink. My hubby ordered a beer and told the bartender that I was going to coast for a while. I objected in a relatively slurred voice and as my hubby objected, I ordered a gin and tonic. When the bartender came back with our drinks, my hubby chatted with him for a bit and gave him the story that we had rented a Cottage Airbnb about 20 minutes away and we had ordered pizza for our 19-year-old son and 22-year-old daughter and we decided to go out for a "date night "drink. He said that he had been outside with the kids all day and was a little dehydrated so asked for a glass of water to go with the beer. The idea was to make it look like I had downed the G&T when it was really water. My hubby told the "cottage Airbnb" story in a relatively loud voice, so that everyone else in the bar could hear as well. He really didn't need to talk that loud because it really was a small place. The whole time I could see the bartender's eyes going back-and-forth between my hubby and me and then up and down me. Just a little skin was showing above the zipper of my jacket and the bartender was clearly "undressing me" with his eyes. I think he liked my leather jacket and wanted to see what was inside. He was creepy.

When we sat down, I was careful to let my skirt ride up so that my crotch would be visible if anyone was able to get a view. Because of the height of the bar table we were sitting at, and the height of the stools, it was clear to me that the bartender, or anyone sitting at the bar, would have a clear view of everything below the table, and for sure everything below my belly button. Trying to be as inconspicuous as I could, as my hubby and I conversed, I began to cross one leg over the other, then slowly cross it back the other way, then leave my legs open and slowly spread them further apart. I repeated this sequencing many times. It was funny watching the bartender because his eyes didn't move off my crotch. Even though he was behind the bar, He was no more than 10 feet away so the viewpoint would have been very good. Seriously, he was bug eyed and simply kept staring. After several minutes of this, he went over to the table with the foursome and then went back to the bar. Lo and behold, over the course of the next few minutes all 4 of the guys made their way to the bar. And it won't surprise you that they all sat down facing my hubby and I, backs to WWE playing on the TV. They positioned the barstools literally facing us. How forward of them. I was wondering if they had seen the game I was playing before. It was good for my ego knowing they chose to face me instead of the TV.

For the next several minutes my hubby and I continued to appear to be deep in conversation, while I kept moving my legs back-and-forth and then open a bit, then wider to give all of the onlookers a great view. Two of the guys put on eyeglasses. I am pretty sure that the way my hubby and I were conversing and acting as if nothing was strange, they all thought it was accidental and they were just getting a free show. Lucky them. I have got to believe that even in a small town most people know that it's not uncommon for women to go pantyless. My jean skirt was by no means too short or too tight, so I really do believe that they would have thought it was all accidental and they were just in the right place at the right time. While all eyes were focused on what they could see of my silky-smooth pussy, my hubby put the lemon and mini-straw in the water and switched the glasses around so the now fake G&T was in front of me and the real one on the other side of my hubby. He dipped several napkins in the real one and put them in his pocket to make it look like he had drunk more than half of the glass. He was dehydrated after all. My water was full, and I now started to sip it slowly as if it was a real G&T. I stood up a couple of times and had some of my hubby's beer as the guys watched to see what I was doing. Each time I got up I swayed back and forth to make believe music and each time I sat back down, I made sure my skirt rode up.

My hubby pretended to get a phone call. When he hung up, he drank what was left of the real G&T. He then went to the bar and told the bartender that our son and daughter had an issue and he needed to go back to help them. He told him that my wife is going to stay here and that he would be back as soon as he could and if she needed another drink to just run a tab. He was assuming that the bartender would remember that the story was we were staying about 20 minutes away so the bartender would have thought best case was he would probably be gone for an hour. I continued to play Ms. Tipsy, sipping my fake G&T and my hubby's beer. I pulled out my phone and started surfing. As soon as my hubby left the bar, the bartender went to the door and went outside, probably to make sure my hubby was really leaving. When he came back in, I was pretty sure that he locked the door. Suddenly, the overhead lights were dimmed somewhat, not off by any means but dimmer and the lights near the door were now off, probably so it looked from the outside like the bar was closed. By now it was probably pushing 10:00pm and the town was probably asleep anyway.

I continued to do the dipsy-doodle with my legs moving them back-and-forth and slowly spreading them further apart. The barstool I was sitting on had those rings near the bottom where you can rest your feet. So, it was very easy for me to rest my feet and shift them side-to-side to spread my legs wider. As you will find out, my lips are big and long and smooth as silk, and at that stage in the bar they were probably a little bit wet, so it would have been a good show. The guys were all simply gawking and not hiding it at all. They kept lifting their beer glasses and motioning "cheers" my way. I just kept smiling and sipping my drink. And doing the dipsy-doodle. To turn it up a notch, as I pretended to be looking at my phone, I began to play with the zipper of my jacket - slowly lowering it a few inches and then back up. Once every 3 or 4 motions I would lower it a little further. It was a really cold night, and I could feel goosebumps on my boobs and my nipples hardening.

Slowly, 1-by-1, the guys from the bar came over to where I was sitting. The bartender stayed at the bar, turned off the TV and put on some music. 2 guys pulled up stools on either side of me and sat down and made small talk. The third and fourth guys were standing behind me. I just kept glancing at my phone and back at them, blinking my eyes many times, and sipping my "fake" drink which was now half empty. I am sure they all thought I was out of it. One guy picked up my drink and although I wasn't sure why, I suspected it might be to take a sip and see if it was a real drink or water. As he raised the glass, I made a motion to grab it but instead knocked it out of his hand on purpose and it spilled on the floor. The bartender quickly appeared with a shot of tequila and lime and said it was on the house. I really had had nothing to drink at that point other than a sip of the gin and tonic so to continue the charade, I figured what the hell. I stood up but made no effort to push my skirt back down. I held the glass up, licked my lips seductively, put lime in my mouth, took the shot and let some of it dribble out of my mouth. I'm sure they all thought that would be the end of me. I heard one of them say quietly under his breath "holy fuck that was hot". I had hoped the dribble out of my mouth might look like cum would look dribbling out. I licked my lips again seductively and lingered for a bit to give the guys behind me time to check out my bare ass - I really wasn't sure how much was visible. When I sat back down, my skirt was still riding up.

For several minutes, more small talk ensued. Where are you from? What do you do? Where are we staying? How long will we be in town? Was that guy your husband? How long have you been married? The normal BS. I did my best to answer in a more or less incoherent manner. The guy to my left put his hand on mine. Then he moved closer and started to nibble on my ear. Then kiss my cheek. WTF, does he think this is some kind of high school date?

One of the guys behind me said it looked like I had a nice tan and asked if I had tan lines. With the light in the bar dim and the zipper of my jacket pretty high, there was no fucking way they could tell if my skin was white, brown or beet red! So, WTF? I did not answer, but just smiled and winked one eye a few times. Then I reached out and took a sip of one of the beers that was on the table. I made sure to lick me lips again as well and let some of the beer dribble out of my mouth. I am a sexy slob after all!

Sometime during all of this, the bartender went back behind the bar, probably because he liked the view from there and I was pretty sure the jerk was using his phone to take some pictures or a video. But there really was nothing I could do about it. I was hoping that the camera was simply focussed on my crotch and not my face. Then I saw him put the phone to his ear. Was he calling someone?

The guy to my right asked me if my jacket was real leather. When I didn't answer him, he reached out and felt the sleeve, moved his hand up my arm, put the side of the collar between his thumb and forefinger, and then, as he released and removed his hand, he grazed my right boob with his open hand. It hovered on my boob for a spilt second and I felt a distinct light grope. Was he testing the waters? I pretended as if nothing had happened. He made some comment about the jacket being light and very smooth and the next thing I knew the guy on my left side was repeating what had just happened, but when he rested his hand on my left boob it stayed there for several seconds. He squeezed a grope several times, and then very quickly lowered the zipper of my jacket a few inches as he moved his hand away. It was probably a little bit lower than in the picture I sent you. But my boobs were still intact. Before we left home I had waxed the zipper so it could be moved very easily. I learned this trick in university from one of my boyfriends. He would wax the zipper of his pants so that when we were out, I could get inside his jeans very easily. He was a lover of hand jobs! So is my hubby btw.

Things now started to get touchy-feely. Hands touching my arms, hands touching my shoulders, cold hands rubbing up under the back of my jacket. One of the guys sitting beside me was more or less petting and caressing my hand and telling me I had soft skin. He kept playing with my wedding ring and joked about what it would look like with cum on it. I figured he must watch a lot of porn! I felt one of the guys behind me begin massaging my shoulders and I closed my eyes for several seconds and made a slight moan. While my eyes were closed, I could feel the zipper on my jacket slowly lowering. It was very cold Saturday night and I could feel the cold air on my skin, my boobs and my nipples as the zipper lowered. While this was going on I kept up the dipsy-doodle spreading my legs wider, and wider to give the bartender a better show. At one point I put my hand between my legs and played with my pussy for a short second to add to the bartender's excitement. And mine. My nipples were rock hard as they became more and more exposed, partly because it was so cold, partly because I was so aroused. Fuk, I was feeling horny.

The guy lowering my zipper couldn't get it completely open. Clumsy! The guy who was massaging my shoulders began to slowly pull back the top of my jacket, more and more towards my shoulders, and more or less started taking it off from the back so it was now over my shoulders and riding up my side. All of a sudden I knew my boobs were now fully exposed and it didn't take long for the guy massaging my shoulders to move his hands down and cup both my boobs. And cop a feel. And squeeze.

I Instinctively I raised both of my hands to push his hands away and cover my boobs. But he reached down and grabbed each of my wrists and pulled them down to my sides and slightly to the back. He whispered in my ear that I was really hot and from the "show" they all knew what I wanted and to just enjoy it and not cause trouble because they just wanted to have a bit of fun with me before my hubby got back. How long was he going to gone again? He then blew in my ear. Really, he did. I stopped resisting and his hands returned to my boobs. He was very gentle. But he had rough hands. He cupped both boobs and squeezed gently and while he was groping me he used his thumb and forefinger to tweak and pull my nipples several times. My nipples were so hard and sensitive that his touch was driving me crazy. Slowly, the two guys on either side of me joined in, and the three of them were freely playing with my boobs and my nipples. The fourth guy seemed to be just totally content watching what was going on. He was now standing in front of the bar table and the bulge in his pants was very noticeable. The bartender came over and stood beside him and he too had a sizeable boner on display through his pants. Quite large. It was then that I noticed he was wearing loose fitting light blue "stretch" jeans and there was a noticeable wet spot forming. Both of them began to stroke themselves thru their pants right in front of me. I watched as the bulges grew to what I had to assume was uncomfortable for them. But they made no attempt to release their hard cocks. Strange. The bartenders cock almost protruded to the waistband of his pants. Oh my!

The groping continued for some time, and it was clear that at least one of the guys was licking his fingers to moisten my nipples. This may seem strange, but I really was getting aroused. I was not expecting to get this far. Or feel quite this way. I kept closing my eyes for short periods of time and moaning very lightly. I put my left hand on the thigh of the guy beside me and slowly moved it to his crotch. He was hard as a rock. I could hear them all whispering amongst themselves about how hot I was, and how stupid my husband was to let me come into a place like this dressed the way I was, and then leave me here. When I moved my hand away from the guy's crotch, he reached out and put it back. With my eyes closed I squeezed it two or three times and also stroked it through his jeans back and forth many times. He was so hard I thought he was going to cum right there. I heard him say several times holy fuk don't stop. He undid the top button of his pants and pulled down his zipper. I moved my hand to squeezing and stroking his cock through his underwear and I could feel pre-cum seeping through. Lots of it. I could now tell he was really thick. He put his hand on mine and used my hand to stroke his cock. He tried to get my hand inside his underwear, but I just kept holding his cock through the thin material and he gave up, likely because what I was doing to him was pleasureful. I was impressed that he was able to hold his load.