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Aphrodite thought back about what she'd said to Becky, she had not allowed her thoughts to return to her temple in quite a long time. For hundreds of generations, young people had come to her beautiful temple to celebrate the goddess of love, toast and sacrifice in her honor. They had also come to curse and shake their impotent fists in her face, damning her for taking away the gift to which they felt so entitled. Aphrodite loved it all. Both the adulation and the detestation. Her truest disciples were those who used only the first door and used it many times, those who fell in love and were not burdened by the fear of losing it. They would sing Aphrodite's praises even when their lovers left them, even when everyone else told them to decry their fortune. Love returned was gift in itself.
Valentine's Day always found Aphrodite at her lowest, few people needed the goddess of love on the one day a year where love seemed to flow like wine. Now she felt useful, and she still had work ahead of her. Finishing her drink and pushing back from the bar, the tall, blond woman strode toward her new club to instruct her new priestesses. They had so much to learn, and she had all the time in the world to teach them.
Hours later the lovers lay on Becky's floor in one another's arms. Daylight streamed through the windows as the two lay lazily dozing after a marathon fucking. Becky was not quite asleep when she heard her roommate come in and swear loudly. Sarah followed the trail of Billy's clothing and saw the pair through Becky's open door. Giving her roommate thumbs up, Sarah went to her room to sleep off her Valentine's Day.
Becky nestled her head into Billy's shoulder. Tired as she was, Becky was happy in a way she hadn't been in a long time. The release of sex wasn't all of it. There was something else underneath it all. Something she couldn't put a finger on. She tightened her grip on Billy's arm. He smelled good. He smelled sexy.
Becky closed her eyes to get some more sleep. Billy was still rock hard and he wasn't going anywhere. A Valentine's Day miracle.
- COMMENTS
Anonymousover 3 years agoI enjoyed this. The story was straightforward, with the title and play on names giving great hints as to the identities of the two beings (when Ms. DeMilo took off her dress, I must admit to saying, “Yay! Arms!”).
That said, it did feel a little rushed and somewhat predictable as a result of the above. I also agree with Anonymous 1/24’s comments. While, good, it could be improved with those suggestions.
Ravey19over 3 years agoA good story which unfortunately felt a little rushed. Take the advice in the comments and I'm sure that your writing will improve.
Story itself was a little mad but enjoyable and I liked the idea.
Anonymousover 3 years agoSay the conversations you write out loud. You’ll find some sound stilted and funny as written. By doing this, you’ll be able to rewrite them into something more natural sounding.
The punctuation, particularly with the quotes, needs serious work.
You may wish to use an editor.
4*
Good luck.
Anonymousover 3 years agoBilly is a great catch. When they are together, and Becky strips him of his clothes, I imagine a darkly-haired chest on that sexy young man Billy! Keep writing and keep them loving!
Anonymousover 3 years agoA well written version of an old story, legend, fable, whatever. Nice characters, with most of the story revolving around the lovers and not too many others to confuse the reader. It was a nice twist to have the ladies at the strip club ready to become priestesses for Aphrodite. Not sure exactly what they will be selling, but probably not the version of love I grew up with?
