by romane
I agree totally with the first of these comments: very good story, so well told, in French, but so poorly translated in English, by, I presume, a "Spanish cow"! !
comme on dit en français : "Parler anglais comme une vache espagnole ! "
Sincerely, and with love, for You and your stories,
Jean-Françoiis
I loved the line "I guessed under her head the cinema that it could be made".
Thank you for the commendable effort you put into writing this story. However, it'd be great if you asked somebody to proof-read/edit your writing. The idea behind the story was truly phenomenal yet the story was lacking in flow suffering from disjointed stilted writing.
Nevertheless, a commendable effort! Bravo!