Dreamer

"Michelle! Come out of the bathroom and just let me see." I can hear your voice through the hotel bathroom door.

"No." I whine against the wall as I stare at my reflection in the mirror, trying not to pick apart the lines on my face. Vindictive words of my past swirl within my self esteem and play their tricks.

"Come on. You're gorgeous. I promise." The tone of your voice has a whisper of annoyance but that is because we play this game often.

"You can't laugh."

"I'm not goin-" You cut yourself from finishing your sentence. I assume you feel that it's easier just to agree with me than to fight, in which case you'd be correct. "Okay. I won't laugh."

"Promise?" The desperation in my reply comes from the need for your validation. My heart knows that you wouldn't do anything to maliciously hurt me. But my brain doesn't want to believe that and the two are constantly fighting with each other.

"Yes of course. Now would you just come out here." The silence that hung in the air was palpable. The thought of just hiding out in the bathroom until you fall asleep crosses my mind. But I need to get over this fear. "Close your eyes." I call out from the other side of the door.

"What? Why?"

"Just close them, please?" I plead.

"Alright, fine. They're closed."

Jittery fingers turn the knob and release it to swing open. I attempt to calm my pounding heart beat by sucking in my breath before taking a step forward. Entering the main area of our hotel room, the golden hour of sunlight peers through the sheer curtains. Casting deep shadows and coating surfaces in a warm amber tint. I am overcome by the sight of you sitting at the end of the bed, waiting for me. Doing my best to retain any amount of confidence I have, I saunter over. Squeezing my way in between your legs and your hands intuitively land on my hips. There's a trace of a grin that is forming as your thumbs can indicate that the fabric adorned on my skin is lacy

"Okay. You can open them." Nervous fingers fiddle with each other. But I stand before you in black lingerie, delicately accentuating various curves.

"Oh. Wow."

"That bad?" I'm ready to dismiss your reaction before you even have a chance to speak. "I knew this was a stupid idea." Defeated and defensive, I begin to retreat back to my safe space of the bathroom.

"No. No." Your hand takes a hold of my wrist before I can get too far. "Come back here." You resume your position of sitting at the edge of the mattress. "You are absolutely stunning."

"You have to say that." I negate your compliment by deflecting and assuming you're already lying to me.

"I don't have to say anything. Alright." You lock your stare with mine and do not allow me to turn away. "Do you see anyone else in this room? Am I looking at anyone else right now?"

"No." I give a bit of pout in my response.

"Exactly. I'm looking at you. I see you and I want to touch you. I need to explore you. Taste you, feel you, and hold you. For as long as I can." With each passing statement, your volume gets softer and I'm drawing closer to you. "So, please. Get those nasty thoughts out of your head for just a bit. Focus on me. I'm here. Melt into me." Whatever incantation you just recited is working, because I am fully taken under by your spell. Nodding my head in agreement. "Good."

I didn't notice it at first, but at some point you started to run the pads of your fingers along my arms. Slowly, they glide up and down, barely touching the surface.

"I want to make you feel everything you desire." The volume of your speech is hardly murmuring.

A trail of goosebumps follows along with your hands until my entire body tingles with anticipation. All of the antagonizing voices in my head diffuse and I'm left with the sounds of my own sighs. My chest rises and then falls as your hand floats up, settling on the space behind my ear. You are inching myself toward you. Bewitching me with your charismatic charm that I am unable to resist. I let myself go and connect our lips together. Kissing isn't something that is new for us. Usually they are furious and hungry. But in this moment, joining together feels brand new, somehow. I part my mouth just enough to let your tongue pass.

With each uninterrupted minute, the kiss intensifies. My arms snake around to your shoulders and I press my chest to yours. You grab my pillowy ass and I giggle into the kiss. Your fingers clenching into the meat. You hoist my frame a centimeter off of the ground for a second; so that you can gently toss me on top of the bedspread. My head tenderly taps the pillow as you slink your way in between my legs. Hands knitting together and pressing against the pillowtop.

You faintly press your knee into my sensitive mound which causes an electrical current to surge through my entire core. I gasp out, my eyes flutter shut with the affixation of your face buried in my neck. You know all of my weakest spots. You understand my body in ways no one else can.

I feel your hands continue to hold me in place, but your mouth has other plans. You travel down my chest, warm kisses leaving a trail behind them. Your tongue flits along the bra fabric that is pressed against my breasts. Lower and lower your head travels. Imprints of your lips stay behind and I try to memorize the placement of each. I never want to forget what your lips feel like against my flesh.

Your hands free themselves from me, but are finding a new home on my knees. Pushing them farther apart so that you can rest comfortably. I can feel your breath as your mouth gets closer to my folds and I instinctively want to arch my back to aid in your journey. But there will be time for that. For now, I have to trust the process and let you work your magic. Even the slightest touch is exemplified.

Your teeth lightly drag across the very thin piece of cloth that separates you from me. My soft whimpers fill the air as I am aching for you to finally make contact. I peer down to see your eyes staring up at me, gauging my response. I can see a smile as you flatten your tongue and skim the top layer of my panties. My hips jut upward, needing to feel more of your tongue against my lips.

"Please, just touch me?" I'm breathless and desperate. I crave you like an addict needs a hit.

Somewhere in the back of my mind, I convince myself that you are loving this just as much as I am. Finally, my wishes are answered and you peel back my lingerie and perform the same feat with your tongue, again and again. Each time, stopping just before my sensitive clit that is begging to be pleased. Taking in each fold at a time. Sucking on it and pushing it aside so that your tongue can slide in the crevasses and repeating the process on the other side.

You shift your attention to my clit, using your fingers to draw back the lips so that you can take it fully into your mouth. Swirling the tip of your tongue around the outermost edge before pulling it with your teeth. My body has no idea how to react and my thighs begin to tremble with the amount of stimulation I am receiving. You suck and flick the tip of your tongue on the most delicate spot on my entire body while your hands keep my legs in place. All I can do at this point is grip the blanket with my fists.

You go ahead trace the folds with one hand, slowly beginning to insert one finger at a time. My walls clench upon entering and you take it upon yourself, with my body cues, to introduce another finger inside. Thrusting them in and out as you pull my juices forward each time. Curling them up toward my g-spot and patting it steadily with your two fingers. My moans have gotten louder as I feel the wave of my orgasm coming close. It starts in my toes as they begin to curl and makes its way up the remaining parts of me

. Everything becomes fuzzy and I start to lose the ability to form sentences. It's as if you know that once I reach this point, there is no turning back. This isn't the time for denial. I need to climax and it is going to erupt from my core. I suddenly feel your lips pull away and my body naturally objects.

But then I realize that you are hovering over me once again, your hand is still deeply embedded into my soaking pussy. I can smell the scent of my juices on your tongue, but my brain can only focus on the jolt that is about to consume me. Resting your head on my shoulder, I feel your hot breath penetrate my ear as you speak softly.

"My Michelle, I want you to cum. I'm not going to hold you back. You can let go. It's okay, I've got you. I'm here. Just cum for me."

You know exactly what I need to hear. To feel comfortable. To feel valued and heard. But most importantly, to feel safe.

I give in and allow the overwhelming desire to take over my body. Just as I'm about to succumb to the orgasm, I can hear a loud siren coming from somewhere. It very quickly becomes louder and louder to the point of not being able to concentrate on anything else. The blaring sound taking over the surrounding space as I frantically search for where it's coming from. My eyes shoot open and I realize that it is my alarm telling me to wake up and start my day. Picking it up off of the dresser and throwing it against the wall in frustration.

It was just another dream. You will always be just a dream.