Drive Me Insane

"Landing strip? That's new. Very cute." She put her mouth on it then went down it to my lips. She licked me lightly. The softness of her movements made every touch that much more electrifying.

She pushed my legs apart to run her tongue from the bottom of my entrance to my clit, making me jolt.

"You're so good at that." I moaned as I looked down at her.

She hummed over my clit in response. She had to pin my pelvis to the wall to keep it still. I was bucking so hard. Her hands were splayed out, touching everywhere as she put my clit in her mouth.

"--wish could bottle." I murmured then bit my lip.

She hummed in question.

"If I could bottle that feeling -- oh god -- and, like, sell it -- ugh -- be a millionaire."

"Focus, Mor."

"Yep. Yeah."

She sucked on me in waves, and her nails started to claw harder into me as she brought me up.

I whimpered and whined in my arousal. She took my hands that were pressed stiffly against my sides to place them over her hair. I gripped the silky waves between my fingers.

"Ohh." I came when she made eye contact with me. "Holy Shit."

My hips vibrated as she brought me down. She slid up my body to kiss me. I loved tasting her lips, especially after she went down on me. I licked across her lower lip, and she shuddered in my arms.

Mushy feelings bubbled up in my chest, and I squashed them down forcefully before I said something stupid.

I pushed her hair back to kiss the apple of her cheek, moving from there to her jaw.

She groaned when I sucked on a piece of her skin.

"You liked that?"

"Oh god, yeah. It, like, pulled at a tendon in my butt."

I spluttered in her face, and she laughed with me. I shuffled us to the bed then laid her down, looming over her. I leaned in, and tried to find the same spot on her jaw.

"There!" She stopped my head.

I sucked softly then amped up the pressure. Her hips bucked into me as she let out a high-pitched whine.

"Stop. Fuck." Her breathing was heavy. "If you give me a hickey on my face, I'm going to be pissed."

I stopped then leaned back to look at her. She was flushed and looked so different than when she was in public. Out of control. "That's nuts. I've never seen anyone get worked up like that. So hot."

"Thanks for finding a hot zone of mine. That's very good to know."

"Let's find some more." I dove back in to kiss her neck.

I couldn't find any more after that with the same intense reaction as before but the one on her stomach was a good one. I ran my mouth across her soft tummy then bit a spot to the side of her bellybutton. She jolted under me.

"Tickle spot?" I questioned.

"No. Feels good."

I placed my mouth over it again and sucked.

"Ohh." She took my head to move it an inch to the right.

"Can I make a hickey here?" I asked between caresses.

"Knock yourself out."

I grinned then doubled down on the sucking. When she started to squirm under me, I stopped to look at it.

"What are you doing?"

"Just mapping the coordinates. It's a tiny little spot, I wanna make sure I can find it again."

I didn't need to look at her to know she was rolling her eyes.

I leaned back in to mouth at her pelvis. Holding on to her soft sides, I licked up her cleft, and she rewarded me with a moan.

My tongue pressed into her inner lips. I traced their texture with the tip of my tongue. My tongue dipped inside her briefly before folding over her clit. I got a little lube and rubbed my fingers in a V up and down while I sucked on her. I looked up to see her pinching her nipple and rolling it between her fingers. After working her up for a while, I took my hand to finger her too. My index finger and middle finger moved up her front wall.

"Another."

I hummed into her clit.

"Another finger, Mor."

I hummed in assent then added a third finger. She arched up and twisted her hips. I pinned her down and sucked harder.

"Fu -- ah!" She squeaked.

I moved with her so she could roll her hips, chasing her orgasm.

She gasped as she came. I slowed everything, finally stilling my hand after a minute. I gave her clit one last lick then took my fingers out while I sat up. I looked at the wetness on them. It was awesome. There was globs of come and a tiny bubble on my finger. I grinned, and stuck them in my mouth.

She looked at me. "Geez. You're something else." She panted out.

"Is that a good thing?" I hovered over her on my palms.

"Yes. In this moment, your horniness definitely works to my advantage."

I grinned widely. Leaning down to kiss her, she met me halfway. We pushed at each other, and she slipped her tongue in my mouth. Every swipe of her tongue tugged at my clit. I leaned back up after a while to thump my palms around her head.

"Let me go get the strap." I spoke excitedly.

She leaned on her elbows to watch me. "Can I ask you a question?"

I frowned at her. "Of course."

She pursed her lips and paused. I tightened the straps around my hips while I waited. The bite of the material felt hot.

"Why do you like using a strap?"

I frowned harder. "What do you mean?" I pretended to root around at my dresser to give myself time to think. "Um -- I don't know. Do you want an emotional answer, a practical one, or an anthropological one?" I turned around once I was ready to continue the conversation.

She giggled as I approached. "Um. Let's go with practical for now."

I raised my eyebrow at her. She took the condom from my hand then tore it open.

"Okay. So the clitoris is a very large organ. When you get aroused, the sensitive areas get bigger--"

"Oh god! This is way more practical than I signed up for."

I shrugged at her then waited for her to give me more direction.

"Okay fine. Do your speech."

I smiled, and geared up. "Okay, so the whole of the clit needs to be stimulated, the best way (proven) to do it, is to have penetrative sex and -- well -- engorge the legs and bulbs of the clit. The parts aren't visible but are close to the vaginal canal. Stop me if you're getting turned off or you already know this."

She put the condom on the strap, and I fixated on her smooth movements.

"That is kind of cute that you studied for sex." she finally replied.

"So if you use a dildo, you stimulate inside to make everything more sensitive. The parts you can't see get huge! Maybe not as sensitive as the head but, still, really fun."

She stood up then threw me on my bed where I sidled up to rest against the headboard. "Okay. Time for the hands-on portion of your lesson." She straddled me then tossed her hair to the side before kissing me.

As she kissed me, she lined up the dildo with her entrance to slide down the length of it. She swiveled her hips to get used to it then rose up to come back down.

"Jesus." I gripped the bend of her waist to support her movements. I stimulated her nipples and simultaneously dug in my fingers at her hip.

She bounced on me as she got hotter. I bent my knees to help move with her.

"Ready to come, babe?"

"Yes! So ready!"

I took my hand to strum her clit, following her up and down.

Her hips faltered, and she stopped on me. I was taking a risk, but -- I took my open palm to spank her.

She whipped her head to look at me even as she started her pace back up.

She drew close to my ear and whispered, "That was really hot."

I grinned before crushing my mouth to hers.

Her hips faltered again, and I spanked her again. It worked to keep her going but less so that time, she moaned at the sound and feeling of my palm. The third time she stopped, I flipped us over to drive into her myself.

Her arms went above her head. I pistoned my hips roughly into her, strumming at her clit.

"You're doing so well, baby girl. Come for me."

She keened as she bit her knuckle.

Her hips bucked wildly as she came. I thrust in her, roughly, a couple more times while I pressed firmly on her clit.

"You did amazing. I leaned down to kiss her collarbones. You're the sexiest."

Her breathing evened out, and I left her pussy. She seemed worn out, so I gave her a minute then pushed her aside to lie next to her.

She rolled over, and laid half on top of me.

I put my arm around her, caressing her arms lightly.

After another couple of minutes I shook her lightly. "Suz? I think you're falling asleep."

"Oh. I'm sorry." she yawned out. "It's been a long week."

"You done for the night?"

"I think so. I'm sorry."

"No worries. I had a blast. You can stay if you want..."

"No. No. I have to go." She said hurriedly as she roused herself. She leaned on her palm to look at me. "Thanks for the lovely evening. I -- uh-- just thanks."

I smiled at her. "It was fun."

She stood up to put her clothes back on. I put on my pajamas to walk her.

I whistled as we walked down the dark step path.

She took my hand, and I tried not to freak out. I squeezed it back.

We walked on in the cool night, pulling on each other playfully. Once we got to a lamp light, I stopped. I looked around then took my phone out.

"What's up?" She asked.

"Can we have one more dance?"

"Here?" She looked around too.

I put on Wonderful World by Sam Cooke on my phone then grinned at her. I pulled her to me by the small of her back, and raised my eyebrows in question.

She smiled. I gripped her hand, and we spun in circles to the rhythm of the song while giggling madly.

I held both her hands, brought her back in then twirled her. As the song was coming to a close, I felt sad. She kept insisting she didn't want to be with me. But when we were together, things made sense. I would bend over backwards for her. Speaking of...

I dipped and kissed her. She ran her hands up my sides to land on my head. The kiss was soft, full of everything I was too much of a wuss to say to her.

I pulled her back up, and she gripped my biceps. She looked at me seriously, first in one eye then the other. She stepped back to walk towards her dorm.

I caught up with her then took her hand again.

We got to her door.

"Goodnight, Mo."

"Goodnight, Suzie."

She kissed me before she opened her door. "See you later, alligator."

I smiled. "In a while, crocodile."

I walked backwards until she finally closed the door.

Back in my bed, I came to a resolution. I couldn't live like that anymore. In the short time I'd met her, I'd gotten hooked. Now I knew she existed, I had to try. I'd kick my own ass forever if I didn't tell her I lov -- oh god.

"I lo --" I frowned, and sat up to try again. "I love -- damn it!" Why couldn't I say it?

If I couldn't say it in my head, how the fuck would I be able to tell her?

I hardly slept that night, berating myself for my shortcomings. I suddenly remembered my own personal Ted Mosby, Jesse. The man who said 'I love you' to someone new every few months. Between me and him, we had to make one complete person. A viable partner for someone.

I finally fell asleep, thinking of how I was going to accost him tomorrow.

----

I ditched my early class but still made it to coffee with Suzie. She was all smiles, and I was all knots.

I found Jesse at his first class, catching him before he went in.

"Hey Mo. Where'd you go last night? I didn't see you, and you didn't text."

"Yeah sorry. Listen can you ditch with me? I'm having a crisis."

"Uh -- yeah sure. I'll ask someone for today's notes later."

"You're the best!" I put my arm around him roughly. "Have I told you recently how much of the best you are?"

"No. But you could say it now with pancakes."

"Yes! Whatever you want! My treat."

He grinned at me.

Once we were in a booth with pancakes slathered in syrup in front of us, we started to talk.

"So what's up?" He asked, muffled, with the pancake in his mouth.

"I'm in love with someone."

His mouth hung open, making pieces of his half-chewed pancake fall out.

He cleaned himself up then rubbed his eyes. "With who? Suzie?"

I looked at him sheepishly.

"Mo, I told you. You should drop it, it might not happen."

"It did happen though."

"What?"

"I mean, don't repeat it -- but yeah, we slept together."

"Holy Shit. Are you dating her?"

"Er. No. It's been casual."

"How long has it been going on?"

I told him the whole story. Everything.

"Sounds like she likes you too. So what's the problem?"

"So many problems. She thinks I'm this chronic womanizer that can't be reformed. She's insisted both times that it's casual, and just a one-off. Plus, I don't actually know her situation. What if she leans more towards guys for dating? What if she doesn't date at all?"

"Omigod. You're so far gone for this girl you can't even hear yourself."

"What? These are all perfectly valid reasons to err on the side of caution."

"No! Fuck that! You like her, she likes you. Grow some tits, man!"

"What?"

"Tell her how you feel, and let her decide. Don't decide for her!"

I ruminated over that. It made sense. "There's another thing. I do love her but when I think of saying the words, they don't come out."

"You just said them."

"No but, like, to her."

"Do you think she expects it from you?"

"No, it's too soon."

He gave me an exasperated look. "So then why freak out about it?"

Everything did seem kind of silly with him shouting reason at me. It didn't seem silly the night before at two AM, post-orgasm.

"I'm going to get her flowers!"

"Amazing!"

"And a dildo."

"Wait, what?"

"Yeah! That would mean we're exclusive."

"Okay. Weird, but if it's a lesbian thing, then sure..."

"I'll put it in the middle of the bouquet."

"Dude, what the fuck? No! That's definitely too far."

"Oh."

"Just talk to her -- bare your soul."

"Bare my soul." I repeated thoughtfully.

"No jokes."

"Why not?"

"You wanna show her you're serious. I know you, if you start riffing, you'll come off as insincere."

I pouted but I was, ultimately, going to take the advice.

"Okay. Thanks, Jess."

"Aw! My little girl is growing up and settling down."

I laughed. "Who'd've thunk? Huh?"

"I knew that beneath your bed-hopping Hefner impersonation, beat the heart of a true monogamous romantic."

"Only had to take the most amazing girl in the whole wide world."

"Okay. Ew. No. I'm nauseous now. Get me a milkshake. This conversation is giving me heart palpitations."

"Whatever you want!" I flagged the waiter down.

----

I texted her the next day, asking if I could visit her at her dorm. She accepted after accusing me of trying something hinky to get in her pants again.

I knocked on her door.

"Hey Mor. What's--" she saw the flowers.

"Um. I got these for you." I handed her the bouquet.

"Uh, okay. Thank you. Come in."

She put them in water while I paced on her roommate's side of the room.

"Where's your roommate?"

"Probably in the common room watching the game, why?"

"No reason." I took a deep breath. I strode to stand in front of her, resting my palms behind her on the counter then slowly pressing myself flush to her. "I want to date you." I looked in her eyes.

Her eyes went as big as saucers. "You want to date..."

"No! I want to date you."

"Right..." she nudged me back to go sit on her bed. "Um -- why?"

"Because I like you. I love your face, your brain, your humor, your smile. I want more time."

"More time?"

"With you. I want to invite you somewhere and be able to kiss you whenever I want. I know I can make you smile, so let me try. I have the potential to make you mad too, yeah, but I'll try my damndest not to."

I sat next to her on the bed, and she looked at me.

"So. What do you think? Would you like to date me too?" I asked her.

"I--I mean, I like you too, Mor. But I honestly didn't think I would hear you say all this."

"Me either! Ha! But then I met you. And this is the honest-to-god truth: I can't stop thinking about you. All of a sudden, I just wanted to be around you, and get to know you."

"Is this why you've been turning down girls recently?"

"Uh -- yeah. I don't wanna be with anyone. Just you."

"Okay... and you know I'm not strictly a lesbian right? I like guys too."

"Yeah. I saw you leave with Rudy from a party once."

She grimaced. "Randy. But yeah." she looked at me and I felt like she was looking into the deepest recess of my soul. "I really like you, Mor. Are you sure about this?"

"100%" I gripped her hands. "It would've killed me if I didn't tell you."

She finally smiled. Her hand caressed my cheek, and I leaned into her touch.

"I need to do something before we start up."

"What?"

"I'm kind of in an open relationship with Randy. I said I didn't have a boyfriend and that's true. He's not a boyfriend."

"Oh." Out of all the things I panicked about, I never considered the potential of her being in a relationship.

"We've sort of just floated around each other for a couple of years, and it's casual. But he does deserve a conversation."

"What are you going to do?"

"Break-up with him. If you could even call it that. He's nice, so he'll take it well. Basically, I'll mostly be saying I'm not going to sleep with him anymore."

"Okay. Do you need anything from me?"

"Maybe a kiss." She smiled.

"Yeah! I can do that."

She hummed as I closed the distance. We kissed softly. I couldn't say the words "I love you" yet. But I could learn. I could learn how to be a good girlfriend. No. A great girlfriend. My lips grazed hers, and buzzed my newfound resolution onto the soft skin of her lips.

She leaned back, and I followed her to place a kiss on her cheek. She hummed a sweet little sigh out.

"Oh, I got you something!" I said excitedly.

"I'm addition to your relationship flowers? Which, by the way, are my favorite. How on earth did you know I like lilies?"

"Your tattoo on your thigh. I assumed that if it was important enough to be on your skin... well..."

"Yeah."

I went to the counter to get the gift wrapped box I'd left there. "Here you go." I handed it to her.

She looked at me before tearing open the wrapping. She shrieked out her shocked laughter when she saw the contents. It was a purple dildo in its packaging.

"If we're going to be exclusive, you know, we'll need a replacement. It's the same size and shape as the rainbow one but we could always exchange it if you want something else."

"You're such a weirdo." She tore open the package to run her fingers over the strap. "Such a sweet, romantic weirdo. This is perfect, thank you." "Oh, I just thought of something else we need to do if we start dating."

"What?"

"Start being nicer to each other."

"Oh. Well, I think all that squabbling was probably pent-up sexual frustration anyway. But yeah, I'll curb my mouth."

"Not too much, though. I happen to like your mouth." She squished my mouth in her hand, making me purse my lips.

When she let me go, I leaned in to mouth at her neck. "So when can we consummate our new relationship?"

She laughed, making her throat vibrate under my lips.

"I'll speak to Randy tomorrow, and I'll tell my roommate I'm having a lady caller on Friday. Sound okay?"

"Yes!" "Stupid Randy."

She chuckled. "Keep it in your pants, Casanova."

I sighed mournfully. "Fine. I'll get out of your hair then before I jump your bones." I stood up while she followed behind. "So -- after tomorrow-- if I see you around campus, I can do this?" I kissed her and held her tight.

"Yes." She grinned when we separated.

"What about this?" My hand slid down to her ass while I licked her collar bone.

"Less socially acceptable. But if you absolutely can't contain yourself, fine."

My eyebrow rose in surprise. "What about this?"

The hand at her ass slid to her front then started to go under her waistband. She squealed, and slapped my hand away.