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Click here"Okay, okay," Johnathan said. As he watched his friend. "Then here are the rules."
"Rules?" Jake took a deep breath and sat back down.
"You cannot force her. She must come to you out of her own free will. She must choose fully to mate with you, and she will talk to me before you do. Understand?"
"I have to get her to fall in love with me?" Jake repeated slowly. "How do I do that?"
"I don't know, my friend," Johnathan said as he leaned back. "I don't know."
- COMMENTS
txcrackerover 3 years agoJust started it today , Big fan of Partwolf and you done good ! All of his stories are werewolf stories , been reading him for years . Your start is excellent . Send him a a message and ask for ideas he's a great guy .
Thanks for the read . 5*'s by the way
MissBennetalmost 4 years agoOh this looks very promising. Looking forward to lots of chapters. Had the same problem with Jake/John. A bit too similar. Keep up the good work.
Anonymousalmost 4 years agoYou have a fantastic base story, hope to see more :) just proof read yourself & then publish :)
Anonymousalmost 4 years agoGreat start. Lots of potential. Good twist to make it original. Looking forward to next chapters.
Anonymousalmost 4 years agoPlease continue with this story you have made a cracking start and it has good potential
tattooed_cowgirl15almost 4 years agoyou've done a good job with the opening chapter. I look forward to reading more
UltimateHomeBodyalmost 4 years agoNice start.
Try proof reading, you don't need an editor as your storyline is good. A good self proofreading method is to use 'text to speech' and listen to it. Wish I had done this myself for my story. Straight reading for multiple times puts me to sleep, making self editing a little difficult.
Only fly to me is that the names of Jake and John are similar enough to cause confusion in the early part of the story where it often jumped between the two.
Kayadalealmost 4 years agoAuthorThank you for your comments... I guess I should do a bit more proof reading for the next chapter, which i'll post shortly.
As to the "Smelt" comment, it is a pass tense version of smell, more British than North American dialect, but I will change it in future chapters, unless i figure out how to edit this with out having to reload the whole chapter.
