Elusive Butterfly

I was one of the pall bearers at Venus's funeral. As I and five others attempted to heft the nearly twelve hundred pounds of Venus and casket, her brother groaned that maybe his sister should have found Jenny Craig instead of Jesus Christ.

"John, I need you to find an attorney you trust and get a court order to go over Sheldon Davis's books," I said. Alex Smith? Dead. Venus Round? Dead. That who was it, Deanna Sweet? Her contract expired the month after Lucy and I bought the back catalogue; she has no claim to any royalties."

John did find an attorney. When presented with the court order, Sheldon declared bankruptcy, therefore tying up his books until a separate court to make a determination.

"Your accountant's got the account number?" Jeri asked me.

"Yeah," I said.

"Get me the routing number for the bank and that account number," Jeri said.

The bank wouldn't give John the routing number without a court order. Jeri again proved that she was one smart cookie. She got on the phone with John and told him to open an account with that bank. He opened an account for Lydia, using one hundred of my dollars. Then Jeri wired twenty five dollars from my account at Iberia Bank, here in Louisiana to Lydia's account.

Routing number in hand, Jeri emptied Sheldon's account into Lydia's account, then emptied Lydia's account, less the one hundred and twenty five dollars into my Iberia account. One point eight million dollars.

"And now? That cock sucker really is bankrupt," Jeri smiled, horrible teeth showing.

We knew leaving that money in my account was risky. Jeri set up an account in the Caiman Islands. Then she opened a second, then third, and fourth account. She emptied the first account into the second, then closed the first account. She then emptied the second account into the third account and closed the second account. The third account got emptied into the fourth account, then the third account was closed.

All of this had taken several hours, the phone line squealing and squawking and slowly transferring information from Nevada to Louisiana, from Louisiana to some remote island I'd never even heard of before.

"They keep saying they going come out with a faster modem," Jeri said wearily. "And I say what's taking ya'll so long?"

"You should do a thesis on this," Collette suggested, giving her roommate a soft kiss.

"I should!" Jeri agreed. "Banking security over the world wide web!"

Going over the books, the books that had the numbers right before Sheldon declared bankruptcy, the court decided that Sheldon Davis had no basis to declare bankruptcy. Louis Stittsen, the attorney John had hired lost no time in filing suit against Sheldon Davis. Armed with forensics, Sheldon Davis was ordered to pay restitution to Jewels Entertainment Distributors, Ltd. The court was unmoved by Sheldon's outlandish claims that somehow, while they had waited for the court to review his accounts, someone had hacked into his bank account and had stolen his money. This was just seen as another attempt of Sheldon Davis's to avoid paying his debts to me.

By now, other clients of Sheldon's were starting to question some of the charges they'd paid to his law firm and were also lining up to sue him. Last I heard, he was screaming and crying and begging the judge for debt relief.

I turned over the management of Jewels Entertainment Distributors, Ltd. to John, who turned it over to Louis. I then sent Lydia a very expensive bicycle for her fifth birthday.

More and more, Jeri, and Collette were spending nights and weekends in my home, in my bed. Amethyst and Sapphire were used to having the girls there when they went to bed, used to having the girls there at the breakfast table. I suggested to Collette and Jeri that they might just want to move in and avoid paying the rent on their apartment.

They gave their landlord the required thirty day notice that they would be vacating their apartment and began moving the lighter stuff, along with Jeri's computer equipment to our home. The third bedroom became their study room and Amethyst and Sapphire begged and whined that they wanted a study room too. So, we put a smaller desk and two chairs in the room for them. While Collette and Jeri sat and studied whatever they studied, Amethyst and Sapphire would sit and quietly scribble on their paper, quietly color in their coloring books.

I managed to find a 45 of 'Elusive Butterfly.' I don't even know what song is on the B side; I played 'Elusive Butterfly' while looking at the portrait of my Lucy.

"Across my dreams. With nets of wonder," and I sip my whiskey sour, allowing the feelings of loss to just wash over me.

Usually by the third or fourth time that song would play, Collette or Jeri would scream at me to please change the song.

But, Collette showed Amethyst and Sapphire a simple dance that they could perform to that song. On my twenty fourth birthday, the three of them performed 'Elusive Butterfly' for me. I cried, thinking how much Lucy would have loved it. She would have loved watching Amethyst and Sapphire spin and leap, fluttering their 'wings' as they danced.

"Baby?" Jeri asked one night.

Jeri called me 'Baby,' and Collette usually called me 'Sweetie.' Neither one of them ever called me 'Darling.'

"Mm-hmm?" I said, not looking away from the evening news.

"Baby, I'm sorry," Jeri said and burst into tears.

She was pregnant. Jeri didn't know how it had happened; she was on the pill. But, somehow, she was pregnant.

"You bitch!" Collette screamed when Jeri and I told her.

Collette had just come in from another night of working at Miss Wendy's. She was hot and sweaty and tired. But the announcement that her friend and lover was pregnant knocked 'tired' right out of Collette. I had to step in and hold Collette back, her claws digging at Jeri's face, then at my face. Her dancer's legs kicked out savagely at me as well.

Collette's screams woke Amethyst and Sapphire from their sleep. So, now I had four screaming, sobbing girls.

Whatever is growing in Jeri's belly? I hope it is a male and a Republican. I am drowning in this sea of Democratic estrogen here.

An older man, face wrinkled and hair gray with some streaks of brown came and got Collette the next day. Collette didn't introduce him, nor did he offer his name or his hand. He just grabbed the three garbage bags of Collette's stuff, threw them into the back of his pickup truck and backed out of my driveway.

Miss Collette was also absent from Miss Wendy's. A new girl was introduced as Miss Annie and Miss Annie forced an almost frightening smile to her horse face.

While Jeri was at school, Amethyst and Sapphire and I went to the Mall and picked out an engagement ring. Okay, I picked out the ring, and Amethyst and Sapphire approved of it.

Darlene and Travis and their little girl, Amelia agreed to babysit Amethyst and Sapphire for the evening. The deal was, they watch my two girls for four, maybe five hours at most, then Jeri and I would watch their Amelia when Travis and Darlene went on a ten day honeymoon cruise. Hmm. Don't sound too fair to me, but what do I know?

Over some very nice steak dinners, Jeri and I talked. We talked about the baby. We talked about Amethyst and Sapphire. We talked about Jeri; what hopes and dreams she had.

I'm still surprised at the amount of food Jeri can stuff into her small body. Collette, I could understand. Being a dancer, Collette burned an incredible amount of calories. But Jeri's a nerd. She's a Star Wars, Star Trek, The Next Generation, Superman and Aqua Man loving nerd.

(Jeri doesn't care for Bat Man; says he's a closet homo. She's a girl; what the fuck does she know? Bat Man gets all Super Freak with Bat Girl and Cat Woman.)

Over turtle cheesecakes, I just blurted out, "Jeri, I love you. Will you marry me?"

She almost spit out a mouthful of cheesecake. She managed to choke down the far too huge mouthful she'd stuffed into her mouth and stared at me.

"You, Baby, you serious?" she finally whispered.

I got down on one knee, right there in the restaurant and showed her the ring. A busboy dropped his bin of dirty dishes when Jeri screamed.

When we picked Amethyst and Sapphire up, Darlene and Jeri squealed at each other. Travis looked at Jeri, then at me and shrugged.

"I uh, kind of thought, uh, you and that dancer?" he whispered as Jeri and Darlene chattered about weddings and honeymoons.

"Nope," I said.

"I mean, don't get me wrong; uh, she's nice, but that dancer..." Travis said.

"Jeri's beautiful; the girls love her, and, we're fixing have a baby," I said, firmly. "Travis; what more I need?"

"You, you really, I'm beautiful?" Jeri asked me as we lay in bed that night.

"You're beautiful," I said.

"No one's ever said I was pretty before," Jeri said, and I heard the sound of tears in her words.

"Jeri, you're not pretty," I said gently. "Pretty fades away, fades away mighty damned quick. Beautiful? Beautiful goes on forever. Want see what pretty looks like after a few years? Let me introduce you to my mom. She used be pretty; she's not pretty no more."

That night, we made love. I am surprised I'd never seen it before. Before? We fucked. Three people joined together to fuck. Now, we were two people making love.

"I really didn't get pregnant so you'd marry me," Jeri said after we'd finished making love.

I was just about asleep. Why do women do that? Wait until you're just about asleep, then want to hold deep, serious life and death talks? Lucy used to do that shit all the time. I'm just about asleep, and she'd ask about some stupid shit about the girls, about college; they weren't even in kindergarten yet, about a vacation, whatever.

"And I didn't ask you to marry me because you're pregnant," I assured Jeri.

Almost twenty minutes later, just as I was on the threshold of sleep, Jeri said, "Then why'd you ask me?"

I rolled over, pulled Jeri to me, and slid myself into her. She groaned and squealed and I pounded her as hard as I could. She tried to kiss every square inch of my body as we fucked.

"You wake me up one more time, you'll get a spanking," I said as I filled her pussy with my sperm.

"Oooh, Daddy!" Jeri teased.

"With a belt. And then you'll get an ass fucking," I continued.

"Oooh, Daddy! Promise?" Jeri cooed.

"Now, go to sleep," I ordered.

I rolled over. Jeri waited for a count of three, then jostled me. She giggled and shook me again.

"Daddy, wake up," she whispered into my ear.

I gave Jeri's small butt four light swats with a belt, then greased her tight little ass hole. She screamed into a pillow as I slowly jammed my hard cock into her, then fucked her ass, hard.

"Now, please, Jeri, go to sleep. Let me sleep," I asked.

"I love you, Baby," Jeri said.

Jeri's mother was a tired looking, chubby red head. Emily Calloway tried to smile, tried to be gracious to me, to Amethyst and Sapphire. But it was evident that life had beaten this woman down.

"I uh, we ain't got whole bunch money," she said when we brought up our plans to marry.

"Mrs. Calloway, money's not a problem," I assured the woman.

"So, ya'll thinking some big fancy wedding, can just forget that," she went on, not even hearing me.

My mom was not impressed with Jeri and did not attempt to hide it. The first question out of my mom's mouth was whether or not Jeri was knocked up.

"Why, as a matter of fact, yes she is," I said. "So, congratulations; you're going to have yet another gran child to love and spoil and spend all kind time with."

I was being a smart ass. Notice, when I took Jeri out to propose marriage, I'd not brought Amethyst and Sapphire to my mom's trailer for my mom to babysit her granddaughters.

"Son, Jesus, I know you ain't all that bright, but shit! Even you got be able see, this ugly little bitch's just trying trap you," My mom said.

"Mom, you don't have worry about coming to the wedding, hear?" I said, scooping up Amethyst and Sapphire.

"God, boy, I'm trying warn you," My mom said.

"And, that, that's what pretty looks like in a few years," I said to a crying Jeri. "See? Fades away, and all that's left is ugly. Ugly looks, ugly heart, ugly mouth."

And God dropped another turd right in the middle of our happiness. Yes, I'm being sarcastic. About the happiness. Not about the turd.

Two days after the meeting with my mother, we were just finishing up dinner when there was a hard pounding on our door. Jeri quickly herded Amethyst and Sapphire into their bedroom while I went to the door.

Collette stood on the doorstep, pretty face streaked with tears. With her, looking ready to spit nails was the same wrinkled up grey headed guy that had come to fetch her when Collette left our home.

Collette and Mr. Turner, he never did give me his first name, declined my offer of coffee, or food, or iced tea.

"This ain't no social visit," Mr. Turner snarled.

"No. If it was, you'd be a whole lot more polite," I said. "Mr. Turner, you're in my house. My house. So, if you can't act polite? You can leave."

"I'm pregnant," Collette said.

"Oh no!" Jeri gasped.

Mr. Turner wasn't happy when he'd entered my house. He was even less happy when he found out that I was already engaged to marry Jeri. When he put two and two together, figuring out that both Jeri and Collette had been sexually active with me, and with each other, he called Collette a filthy whore, told her she was just like her mother, and stormed out of my house.

"Think he forgot something," I said, looking at a sobbing Collette.

Jeri looked at me over Collette's shoulder. She softly shook her head at me as she rubbed Collette's back, cooing softly, trying to comfort Collette.

Collette gave birth to Emerald Elisabeth Jewels, a beautiful blonde with big blue eyes, all ten fingers and all ten toes. Collette didn't name Emmy 'Elisabeth' after my mom. Elisabeth was Collette's mother's name.

Two days after we brought Collette and Emmy home from the hospital, Jeri delivered Stone Gerald Jewels. He has a shock of red hair, brown eyes, and very healthy lungs.

Both mommies decided to breast feed. There is no more beautiful sight in the world than mother and child joining in that simple act.

Amethyst and Sapphire thought it was the greatest thing in the world, being big sisters. Until they smelled that first shitty diaper.

"Oh, hush," I laughed as I changed Stone's diaper. "You two smelled a hundred times worse. I can't tell you how many times the neighbors called the cops on ya'll."

"That's not true," Amethyst said, pinching her nose.

"Yeah," Sapphire agreed.

Four months after giving birth, Collette and Jeri both returned to school. Collette was entering her junior year, Jeri was working on her Master's degree.

Amethyst and Sapphire also started school, in pre-Kindergarten. Collette and Jeri and Emerald and Stone went with me as we dropped my girls off.

Jeri had to drive home; my eyes were too full of tears. Lucy should have been here, to see our girls, our two big girls on their first day of school.

A week before Emerald's first birthday, Collette didn't return home. At first, I didn't think anything of it; she often had study groups and assignments that kept her after classes.

After dinner, after four children were bathed and put in bed, there was still no sign of Collette. I started to get worried. Jeri was also worried; she'd seen Collette on campus and Collette had not said anything about a late assignment.

When she went into their study room, Jeri logged onto the computer. A moment later, she called me into the room.

"Mystery solved," Jeri said quietly.

We read the email Collette had sent to Jeri from her Louisiana Tech account. She hadn't meant to, she had tried hard not to, but she had fallen in love with Brian Eastlake, a fellow Music Theory student. She was tired of living a lie, tired of coming home, pretending to love us, love Emmy, then going to school and having to constantly look over her shoulder, having to make sure that Jeri or any of Jeri's friends weren't lurking around as she was with her true love, Brian.

"What an idiot," Jeri murmured.

"You know this Brian guy?" I asked, wondering why I wasn't upset as I read Collette's words.

"Yes," Jeri said, her dislike evident.

"And?" I asked.

"God, Randy! He's a loser. A big ass giant loser," Jeri spat. "All cotton candy."

"Cotton candy?" I asked.

"All fluff, no substance. Tastes good, but damn, you still hungry after eating it," Jeri explained. "Guy's a dumb ass. Writes really bad songs, thinks he's going be a big star. Sings everything real nasal."

Brian and Collette didn't finish the semester. They loaded their music equipment into the back seat and trunk of Brian's 1984 442 and drove to Nashville, Tennessee. As of yet, I've not heard any hit songs written or produced or performed by Brian Eastlake, Collette Eastlake or Collette Turner.

We celebrated Emerald's and Stone's one year birthday on the same Saturday. What? It's not like they know any better. Amelia and Amethyst and Sapphire had more fun at Emerald's and Stone's birthday than Emmy and Stone did.

We were watching Amelia; Travis and Darlene were at a couples' retreat, working on their marriage. They weren't even married a year and they were already talking divorce.

After our second wedding anniversary, Jeri came to me, lips tight over her bulky orthodontic braces. I was blessed by one thing in life; I'd never had to endure braces. My teeth aren't perfect; I do have a slight overbite, but not bad enough to need braces.

"Baby? You know I love you," Jeri started.

"Yeah. Don't know why, but I'm glad you do," I agreed.

"Randy, Lucy, how long she's been dead?" Jeri asked.

I tried to do the math in my head. Thankfully, Jeri stopped me.

"Baby, I'm tired, I'm sick and tired of looking at her picture all the time," Jeri said, voice real tight. "Baby, I know you loved her, but God damn! She's gone. She's gone. And every day, every God damned day, I got look at her looking at me."

I bought a plot in a small cemetery, bought a nice headstone and buried both the portrait and the decanter of Lucy's ashes. I think I probably cried more that day than I had cried on the day that Lucy actually died. I am not being dramatic when I say I honestly wish God had taken me instead of taking my Lucy.

Now, over the fireplace is a large framed photograph of Jeri, Amethyst, Sapphire, Emerald, and Stone. Where the decanter used to sit are Amethyst's and Sapphire's numerous dancing trophies and soccer trophies. In time, I am sure Stone and Emerald will add their own trophies to the collection.

Jeri got her Master's Degree in Computer Science, then started working on her doctorate. Her thesis is on computer security on the Information Superhighway, the World Wide Web.

I am so pissed off at the Republican Party; how in the hell could they nominate Bob Dole? The man is brilliant, he's a veteran, he's a true servant of the people. But he is so damned boring. He won't even use pronouns, for God's sake.

There is no way a man like that could stand a chance against someone as charismatic as Slick Willie. I don't care if it is Bob's turn in the bull pen. The only other person in the Republican Party as sure to lose to a snake like Bill Clinton would be Dan Quale.

Thankfully, on November 5th, 1996, I didn't have to watch the election returns. I was at St. Francis, holding my wife's hand as she sweated, cried, screamed and cursed me. On November 6th, at 2:15 in the morning, we welcomed Amber Emily Jewels to our lives. She too had a shock of orange hair and brown eyes and scrunched up face.

Travis and Darlene had lived together for six, almost seven years and even had a daughter together. However, the moment they married, it all just fell apart.