Eva Pt. 16

Before she left, I managed to ask "Angel, what about Tom Sorenson and Corey?"

"Tom is fine; he's in this hospital on another floor. You saved his life with your jacket and belt; you kept him from bleeding to death."

"You too, Angel. You stayed with him and kept him from going into shock."

"Yeah, well, it was your idea. My hero." Then the small smile on her face disappeared. "Bear, I'm sorry. Corey didn't make it. I heard you tried to save him and the others in the gym. You really are my hero. And a lot of other people's hero."

"I didn't want him to get hurt, dammit. He was just a kid." I was crying softly.

"Bear, you did save a lot of lives. He had three clips of ammunition with him. He could have shot a dozen or more people. You really did save lives today...yesterday. We'll talk about it later today, my love. I love you with all my heart." She kissed me again and went outside the room. A minute later my son and my sister came in. Connor in his whites, still looking freshly pressed somehow and Cammy with a frightened look on her face.

"Dad, how are you feeling? Besides in pain." He looked pretty scared as well when I saw him up close.

"Tired as hell. Sorry I scared you all and dragged you away from school."

"Dad, stow that nonsense. You think anything is more important than my family? Though I thought I was in some sort of trouble when I was told the Superintendent wanted to see me in his office. I wish I had been. I'd rather be thrown out than see you like this."

Then Cammy kissed my head. "Jon, you're a hero again. You saved me back then, and now you saved more children. You've always been a hero to me."

"Cammy, stop saying that." I wanted to yell but I could barely speak louder than a croak. "I'm no hero. A teenager died today. I was supposed to save him with all the others. I lost a child today." I was beyond exhausted. I turned my head just a little, as much as I could, as a tear dripped from my right eye. Cammy and Connor didn't know how to respond to me.

"Dad, we'll be back later, in the afternoon. Try to get some rest."

"I don't think that will be much of a problem, Connor. I'm glad you're here, son, but don't miss too much school. Don't fall behind. And Cammy....I appreciate what you said. But I don't know......" I fell asleep before I was aware that they left.

The nurses let me sleep until 10, then they woke me to do a bunch of things to me, all of which hurt like the Devil's Pitchfork. Changing the linen, pulling out the tube from my penis that was draining urine and changing it for a fresh one (a Foley tube, aka catherization, a very unpleasant experience). Finally at least some water. Then back to sleep.

Eva came back around 3 with Connor and Rachel. My sweetheart daughter was too young to come in the ICU but she could stand at the glass door and wave to me. Seeing her improved my spirits greatly. She was singing something, but I couldn't hear her until Eva opened the door as Connor lifted her up. Then I heard her sing what had become our song, You've Got a Friend and she sang it perfectly, and I cried and blew her a big kiss. The nurses and a few of the other patients made a big deal over her, and the head nurse snuck her in for five minutes. "Hey, my Little Angel. I'm sorry I won't be able to come home for a few days. But I love you more than ever."

Connor helped her up so she could lean over and kiss me, on my nose and my cheek, and I saw the fear and love on her face. She said "I love you too, daddy. Everyone is talking about you. You were even mentioned on the news this morning."

"Connor, what is she talking about?"

"Dad, this was the main story on the local news last night and this morning. You were mentioned by all the reporters. They're even calling trying to get interviews with mom, with teachers, even some students. Mom told them no comment and hung up. The phone didn't stop ringing all morning." I was very uncomfortable with all this. "There's TV trucks in front of the hospital too, trying to get interviews with doctors and nurses. You're a big deal."

"Stop saying that!" I shouted much louder than I intended. I even upset Rachel. I kissed her when Connor held her up for me again, then I told them to send their mother in to see me. Eva came in and kissed me with all her love, which made me feel a little better.

"Hey, Angel. How are you feeling today?"

"I'm supposed to ask you that, Bear. I'm better, since I got some sleep. I don't know how I slept without you there." She got a little misty, then brushed it away. "Unfortunately, the phone didn't stop ringing since nine this morning. Every station and newspaper wants to talk to you or to me about you. But forget that for now. I'm not talking about it. Just tell me how you're feeling?"

"It hurts like hell. I thought I'd scream when they were changing my bed and my tube down there...."

"Oh! I would think that's uncomfortable on its own. I'm sorry, Bear." She kissed my hand and squeezed it gently. "So the police called and they're going to be by this afternoon to talk to you for a few minutes. We have to close the school for the rest of the week. First for the investigation, then to do a proper clean up. I'm moving our offices, across the hall. We can't stay in those offices any more." Neither of us said anything about that. "Did the doctor come in this morning?"

"Yes, he was here a couple of hours ago. He said I could probably go to a regular room in a couple of days, and maybe I could come home in another two weeks. I asked him about going back to work. He told me it might be three months or longer. I might not be back until the end of February. I'm sorry, Angel. Really."

Eva looked at me with tender affection. "That's the last thing I'm worried about. Bear." She stroked my hair and her eyes swelled with tears. "I keep thinking how much worse this could have gone. What if he had shot some of the students or other teachers? Bear....what if..." Eva broke down and cried hard, even with other patients in the other beds and nurses all around. I wanted to hold her more than anything, but I couldn't. I couldn't do more than touch her hand.

"Angel, I'm alive. And I'll get better. I promise. I'm not leaving you or our family or our other family. No way. But I should have saved him. I know a lot of the students and parents are going to condemn Corey, but he was just a kid. An abused child. I couldn't save him. It was our job to save him." We were both crying and even though it was the end of the fifteen minute visitation period, the nurses left us alone for a little while longer, until we both stopped crying. Then the head nurse on duty respectfully let us know visiting time was over for two hours.

Eva got herself together. "Jon, I love you so much. More than ever, I think. You're my brave husband, and I adore you. Stop denying that what you did wasn't brave, heroic even. You saved lives yesterday. You were supposed to stay in your office and hide. As your wife, I'm pissed that you put yourself in danger. Furious, even. But as your colleague and as a human being, I am beyond proud of you. You're the best man I've ever known, and that includes my own father. It's close. But you're the best. I adore you." She leaned over and kissed me again.

"I don't know what to say, Angel. I'm...." I couldn't speak. I couldn't find words, and I couldn't say them even if I could. Between the pain, the medication and my confused emotions, I couldn't even tell her I loved her.

"I have to go, but we'll be back in a few hours. I'll take Connor and Rachel to get something to eat. Hopefully the police will be here before then. Jon, my love....I really am proud of you. But don't ever do it again." She kissed me again and then she had to leave. I missed them all the second she stepped out the door. Terribly.

Some time later, while I was between dozing in and out, two detectives did come to talk to me. It was nothing like that encounter years before. This was a very friendly interview, as friendly as could be under awful circumstances. They assured me I was in no trouble, not suspected of any crimes. They just wanted my story of what happened. So I answered their questions, the sequence of events as best as I could remember, was there any warning from Corey that he was capable of such a thing, and so on. I told them if we thought he had access to a gun, we never would have let him back in the school.

Then one of the detectives asked the question I regret to this day. "Corey Romano was showing violent behavior before yesterday. He threw a chair two days before, got into a couple of fights, right? So why was he even there yesterday? Weren't you and your wife concerned he could escalate?"

I cried, not sobbing, but tears leaking from the corners of my eyes. "Detective, we had no idea he was so dangerous. We didn't know he could get his hands on a gun."

"His father was a collector and avid shooter. He took Corey to the firing range all the time. From what we've learned, he was a highly skilled shooter himself."

"We had no idea. What about Mrs. Romano? She was in our records, but we never met her. She never even answered the phone at home or called us back. We only dealt with the father."

The detectives looked uncomfortable. "From what we can tell, Adele Romano left the family over two years ago. She's had no contact with her son since she left; there's no record of phone calls or letters from her in that time. She'll find out about this if she lives anywhere in the country; it's made the national news. But so far, the woman is like a ghost. We can't even say for certain if she's alive."

I felt so much worse from that news. Corey needed help long before we were aware of his problems, and we didn't get it for him. The fact that we didn't know about his problems didn't make me feel any less guilty. When Eva got to the hospital a little later, it was obvious she heard the same news. It was written all over her face.

After kissing me and sitting down, taking my fingers in her hand, and asking her how Rachel was doing (she was ok during the day, very upset at night because I wasn't home to sing with her), we discussed what we knew about Corey before he started showing signs of trouble.

"After the police told me about his missing mother, I went to the office and pulled Corey's records. Someone signed his admission forms under the mother's line on the signature page. It doesn't look like John Romano's (the father's name) signature and it does look distinctly female. We don't know if it was the mother's or if John Romano got someone else to sign for him. Bear, I think we made a huge error here. We never met the woman, just accepted the forms with a signature."

The look on her face was as horrified as what I was feeling inside. We never met the mother, we just accepted a document as fact without any proof. Why would we doubt it? We wouldn't have thought someone would fake a document for his sons' admission to school. What had Corey seen growing up in that house? Why had his father needed to fake his wife's existence? One possibility froze our blood.

I squeezed Eva's fingers. "We're going to have to change the way we do some things for the future. But right now, I want to talk about something else, Angel. Anything else. What's going on at home?"

"Connor's going back to school in the morning. He can't miss too much time, though I think they'd cut him some slack under the circumstances."

"Don't count on it. Well, maybe a little. How's Rachel?"

"She's doing ok, all things considered. She's very proud of her father, though she misses singing with you at night. She's not the only one who misses you especially at night." Eva had a sweet and sad smile on her face.

"Sorry, Angel. I might be unable to perform those husbandly duties for a few months."

"Do you really think that's what I was talking about? I'll miss that while you recover, sure. But what I'm already missing is your affection and our intimacy. Those talks we have in bed at night. The way you hold me and shower me with wonderful kisses. I could live without sex, Honey Bear. I couldn't survive without your love."

Damn. That woman is something special, I thought to myself. "Honey, could you come closer? I need some help adjusting my pillow." Eva got up and leaned over me to reach behind my head. I lifted myself up as much as I could, pain be damned, and I kissed her, not for long, just a soft touch of my lips to hers. "That's all I needed, sweetheart. For now." I moaned in pain for a moment, but I felt better when I saw the loving smile on her face.

"You are such a sweet man. How could I live without you?" She stroked my hair on my head. "With that cast on, I'm not going to be able to play with your chest hair. Kind of sucks." We laughed a little, even though it hurt like hell. It was worth it to share a little laughter. She kissed me again and sat down. "I almost forgot to tell you, I did speak to Audrey Callum (the current chair of the Trustees) and she wanted you to know how the entire board is grateful for what you did. They'll see you when you're in a regular room, which the doctor said should be tomorrow or the next day. And parents have been leaving phone messages and emails to thank us for...well, you know. The TV stations and newspapers are all trying to get an interview with me, at least until they can speak to you. I'm not interested in talking. It's too personal. Maybe when you're up to it, we can do it together with advice from your sister. Oh, and my parents are taking some time from work and coming down to stay tomorrow. At least until you're home."

She sat with me, quietly for a couple of minutes, our fingers interlocked. "Eva, I am so sorry I'm putting you through all this. The harassing phone calls from the press, the extra work you'll have to go through at work and at home...the worrying about me. I would do...."

"You'd do the same exact thing, Bear. Just what I'd expect you to do. You went to protect the children, which is your nature. Your decency is one of those things I love about you. When Cammy needed help, you didn't even think of doing anything else."

"Wait, honey. That was just as much you as me. And I know you too. If Tom Sorenson hadn't been wounded in the hallway, you would have insisted on coming with me into the gym, despite what you kept saying, trying to get me to stay with you. You would have gone if I stayed. I know it."

"Probably. Maybe. I don't know, and I hope to God we never, ever have to find out. I just know I'm so deeply in love with you, more and more every single day."

"I love you too. More than I could ever say. But I have one favor to ask you."

"Name it, Bear."

"Send our kids in? I miss them so much."

"Immediately. The nurses already said Rachel can come in any time as long as it's with an adult." She kissed me, a longer, loving kiss. "No more of that for you. You'd have a problem if you got an erection with that catheter inside you." She giggled and I ached in my penis just thinking about it. She went out and in came Connor and Rachel. I kissed both my kids, talked to them for a little while, then I asked Rachel to step out so I could talk to Connor alone.

"So your mother told me you're going back to the Academy tomorrow. Good, you shouldn't miss too much time there. There's too much competition."

"Dad....what would you say if I took a semester off? The Spring semester? To help you and mom and Rachel while you recuperate and go through physical therapy."

"I'd say no way. You're doing so well there and I don't want you losing your rank in your class. Your mom and I have done well over the years with investing our money and saving from our salaries. If we need help at home, we can easily afford it. You go back to school. I'm going to be all right. It'll take a while, but we'll all be fine. Except that we miss you and love you."

"Dad....I'm so proud of you."

"No, son. I'm proud of YOU." We hugged and he went out the door and back to school the next day.

The next day I also moved, down to a regular room with a roommate, a nice as could be man named Abi, a 60 year old Black man from North Philly who worked for the city as an bookkeeper. He was there recovering from open heart surgery. We got along fine, his wife, Dora, was from Nigeria, she was a nurse in the same hospital, and very friendly. She and Eva hit it off when their visits overlapped. It was nice to have someone to talk to.

The police located Adele Romano, living thank goodness, in a small town in Illinois. When she was interviewed, she told them about years of physical and emotional abuse from her husband until she got in touch with a group that helped such women escape. But she couldn't take Corey with her. I never found out why. She was all over the news in the Philly area for days and she started getting harassing phone calls and had to disappear again. I didn't know what I thought about her, and Eva and I decided whatever she did was her business. We couldn't know how desperate her situation was. But in the back of my mind, I blamed her for what happened.

Abi obviously knew why I was in the hospital and aside from thanking me for trying to save the children one time, he was kind enough not to keep talking about it with me. But when the news about Mrs. Romano came out, he could sense how troubled I was. I was seeing a psychiatrist on staff every afternoon while I was there, but he wasn't connecting with me. Abi, however, did.

"Jon," he said to me one morning, in his thick North Philadelphia accent "Dora comes from a village near Lagos. It's been the site of many attacks by rebel soldiers, then government soldiers. Back and forth it goes. I thank God every day she got out of there when she did, forty years ago, when she was a teenager. I wasn't a religious man before I met her, and I'm not really one now. But I do thank God for her. She's given me six amazing children. We're not rich, but we have a good life together, like you and Eva."

"I can tell. She's a lovely woman, Abi. We're both lucky men."

"Amen to that. She got out of her village, Oyero, because a friend of a friend of her father saw something special in her, and got another friend here to sponsor her for school. A total stranger gave her that chance and she took it, and every day of my life I thank God for her and for that stranger, a man she never met, who saved her so she could do something good with her life. She goes back to Oyero for a couple of months every other year, bringing medicine and a couple of other nurses with her. White and Black. Strangers helping strangers. You and Eva, how many children have you helped by running your school over the years? A few thousand? And you told me you started a scholarship program there for children whose families couldn't afford to go there, right?"

"Yes. It was ten a year to start, now it's thirty."

"Strangers helping strangers. They become like family. When you entered that gym, with that poor boy scaring those children and teachers, what were you thinking?"

"I don't know if I was thinking about anything. I just knew I had to protect those people if I could. They were my responsibility."

"You and your wife are well educated. You could have done anything you wanted to do. But you chose to work with children. Children are the greatest gift God gives us. When people put their children in your care..."

"They're trusting you with their most precious possession. I know, that's one of Eva's favorite sayings, she's been using it for as long as I know her, to teach others who work with children." I thought about that for a couple of minutes, like I hadn't done for some time. Abi let me just think it over. "You know, you're a very smart man yourself. Very wise. And a damn good man." I smiled in a way I hadn't done for days.

He held up a small cup of orange juice and I did the same. "To two good, wise men."