Exclusive Relationships

We also sketched in plans for the summer and for that matter, the balance of our college careers. Penciled in was marriage after graduation and two children living in a white cottage with a picket fence.

Our running careers demanded many work outs and practice. With summer jobs it was hard to find time for loving as well but we struck on a solution that worked out well. About half way between our homes was a heavily wooded nature preserve with many different trails that we could use for our every other day long runs. The added benefit was that near the parking area there was a small secluded clearing where we kept a waterproof bag in a hollow log. The bag contained hand towels which needed to be washed occasionally, a blanket and a box of tissues. At the end of most of our practices in nice weather we put these items to good use.

The next three years were incredibly busy and productive regarding Running, Education and Romance. We both did well in distance running and stayed with Cross Country for four full years. I made the NCAA finals every year and graduated with a wall full of awards. Anna also did well and made the finals twice. She was dogged by a persistent ankle issue that was a nagging reminder of her Freshman injury. This was to plague her for a long time. It didn't prevent her from running but did keep her from competing at a consistently high level. As an aside here, Anna's running kept her five foot frame in perfect condition and her weight within a pound of her optimum. Both of us stepped away from the Track Team to use concentrate on Cross Country because of the time demands of classes and also frankly our love lives.

On the Education side, I graduated in five years with a Masters in Computer Engineering. Anna always loved kids and so she vacillated between Elementary Ed and Phy Ed but eventually settled on classroom vs gym.

On the love life side we had hectic schedules for those years but we continued to explore and our love for one another did nothing but grow and grow. Three weeks after our BA graduations we walked down the aisle and became husband and wife officially. That summer we took an apartment in town because I had one more year to go for my Masters and Anna had a job teaching third grade to support us for the year.

Besides having a ball with our own king sized bed we spent a lot of the year researching where we wanted to finally settle. The area of course had to have decent weather most of the year and good prospects for employment. Eventually we settled on the Research Triangle area in North Carolina. My athletic career and grade point average made me an attractive hire and soon several computer engineering firms were vying for my attention. Spring break of that year we drove to the area and fell in love with the Raleigh Durham area. Two weeks after getting my Masters, I started work at Cisco Systems and Anna was debating between three different charter schools. She picked the most interesting one which also was the one closest to our apartment.

Within five years we were in a house in an up and coming area and I thought doing well enough to think of starting a family. The only problem with that was that Anna was opposed to the idea and I guess that wasn't the entire issue. Our love life had started to taper off and what remained was starting to feel sort of routine and listless. I repeatedly asked her about it and she denied that there was a problem. It was all my imagination so she said.

Anticipating the worst I hired a PI and it didn't take more than a week to discover that she and a fellow teacher were engaged in a sexual relationship. The other teacher lived close to the school and so it was convenient to stop off after school for poolside sex and related romantic activities. Was I shocked? Fuck yes I was but the even larger shock was that her lover was another woman. All our marriage I had believed that Anna was 100% straight and now this comes in from left field. How the fuck had I been so blind?

I took several days off to consider my options telling Anna that it was a business trip. Instead I spent a day each with three long time mutual friends. The two guys advice was "dump the bitch, cheating is cheating." The third, a long time girlfriend of Anna's said she wasn't surprised because her lover before me was a lesbian. Here I always assumed that the cheating ex that she had so repeatedly referred to was male. Clueless me.

And so, when I got home I chilled a bottle of wine and set up a little montage of the pics of Anna and her lover on my computer. When she came in that night she came right up to me and gave me a very tender kiss on the cheek and said in a very soft voice.

"Terry called me and said you know. I so sorry I wanted to tell you myself but I just couldn't find the right time and way to do it. What do you know?"

"Just her name, address, place of employment and this."

When I started the slide show on my computer she sat down silently for a minute before saying.

"Just seeing these pictures makes me look like a cheap slut doesn't it? I don't think I am but then who knows. Unfortunately for us Alicia has sadly displaced you as the love of my life. I am so sorry but I fought it for over a year and finally succumbed. I have to be with her and that is obviously why I put off having children. I wished so much that I could resist and that we could be together and have a family but it was just not to be."

"Will you be moving out or do you want to buy out my share of the house?"

"I'll buy you out and I want you to know that I only want to keep my own savings and retirement plan. You have always been so nice and generous with me and I feel bad that I have been such a cheating bitch."

"So am I Anna, so am I."

Within three months we were divorced moving on with our new lives. She was engaged to her lover and I was working 60 hour weeks to bury myself in my career. I volunteered for out of town assignments, was working my ass off and trying to work through the incredible issues that Anna had dumped on me. I had always thought I was a bright perceptive guy and was I fucking wrong. Obviously I was dumb when it came to the former love of my life. Dumb, stupid and blind might be a better description. I had spent seven years thinking I that I knew this woman and then everything just fucking blew up.

Eventually I got over the immediate hurt and depression and had shoved it back into a distant recess to be taken out and fondled occasionally when I was drunk and feeling sorry for myself. On the career side all my extra hours were paying off, my bosses were all suitably impressed and I got the plum assignment that was the prize in our department. As part of that assignment I had to travel to some of our other facilities and coordinate various marketing, advertising and PR personnel. On one of those visits who the fuck did I run into but Sally the Slut. I was in a large meeting room at a gigantic table of at least 30 people on this committee. This was was one of those deals when everyone is introduced and stands up to say a few meaningful words about the project. She must have come in when I was occupied with other arrivals because she turned up down six places down from me on the right and I didn't recognize her name on the list of employees.

The attendees listened politely as I gave the formal introduction and then worked around the 30 participant table. I was shocked when a Sally Wakefield whom I remembered as Sally Conners got up and introduced herself as our communications specialist. She was the person that most of these large committees have to fix the written communications of the group. They work on the press releases, grant proposals, RFP's, study papers, project summaries etc. In other words, they fix the techies crappy writing. By the time the mike came back to me I had recovered most of my surprise and had realized that Sally must be operating under a married name.

After the introductions, I outlined the basic objectives of the committee in a fifteen minute summary. I then broke the project down into four carefully defined subject areas and introduced the subcommittee chairs of each. They in turn were invited to briefly discuss their aspect of the project. I followed this with a schedule of meeting times and with two minutes to spare on my self imposed one hour meeting length I made my pithy closing statements and adjourned.

As I expected, Sally was waiting to talk to me after the last of the other employees had left the room.

"It's wonderful to see you again Josh. I've followed your career from a distance and have heard great things about you. Rumor at the water cooler is that you are headed for big things after you tie up this project."

"Just trying to do a good job like always but what about you? I didn't recognize your last name on the list of attendees. Have you been with the company and here in the Triangle for long?"

"Actually I've been here for about five years and the name was from my ex spouse. I just haven't bothered to change it back yet. Look, I know this is awkward with us having a history and all so why don't I just go down to HR and request a transfer? I don't want to be the cause of any problems."

"I thought about a transfer as well but upon reflection I don't think you should. We are both adults and besides I asked for the best writer in this division and presumably they assigned him or her. No, unless you have a problem with the assignment lets's just follow through with the placement the way it is. Tongues will start wagging if there are any abrupt personnel changes. Agreed?"

Extending her hand for a handshake Sally said with a smile.

"That's a deal Boss. No abrupt changes."

I carried the tactile memory of that handshake for some time. That as well as her body scent brought back many memories late at night as I tried to sleep. Sally had been a cheating cunt but man she had had a gorgeous body and was oh so much fun to fuck. It was difficult to put the fuck toy image of Sally out of my mind but for the most part I succeeded at least during our professional interactions. I had found that she had a crisp concise writing style and the ability to organize the concepts of the engineers, programmers and techs into coherent prose. With her reviewing and reworking the reports of the different subcommittees, the project moved along faster than I and the upper management group had projected.

Our interactions as the project developed over the following months became less and less formal and I found that besides being an excellent writer she was intelligent, witty and quite professionally charming. All of this in addition to having an earthy sexuality would have normally led a single male to ask her out for a date. A point she made in my office as we were finishing up her portion of the project.

"So Boss, I've got a personal subject to cover before I leave. Permission to speak?"

"You don't need my permission to speak."

"About this I do. I want to begin by again apologizing......."

"For What? Did you do something recently to harm me or the company?"

"No it's for what I did when we were dating."

"Didn't you cover that in the letter you sent me after I broke it off.? You don't have to go there again. You said you were sorry and I was sorry you cheated. We both went on with life. I understand that you married and I'm sure you know that I did too. We both also divorced and I would wager we both have regrets about various life choices made. Wouldn't it be much more productive to concentrate on the present and future while using the past for a guide?

"I would agree unless the conclusions drawn from the past are incorrect. For instance, if the conclusion drawn from my history is that as a serial cheater I will always cheat and I therefore I can never be trusted is incorrect. The problem is, I have no way of proving that I will not offend again,"

"And so do we rely on history or not? The British relied on Hitler's pledge to stop his European aggression and then were shocked as shit when he invaded Poland. Likewise, Stalin was shocked when Hitler violated their non aggression pact and invaded Russia. In both cases the innocent were I guess stupid to rely on assurances that 'I have changed, you can trust me'. See what I mean?"

"But I have changed. Six months ago I got really serious about counseling and began working with a new therapist. Part of that therapy is to apologize sincerely to all those who will listen to me. That's why I hope that I can buy you a drink some evening and I can explain how sorry I am."

"Sally of course I'll have a drink with you. You're a beautiful intelligent woman that I would be proud to be seen with. However, if you are expecting much beyond an ear that will listen, please don't hold your breath."

The company has guidelines when it comes to dating direct reports and so I went so far as to check in with the HR head of my division to report an after hours meeting. She gave it a green light because Sally wasn't a direct report nor could I influence her termination.

Sally and I met at a quiet little restaurant with secluded booth seating. I was sitting facing the door and so when she came in and walked across the restaurant and the 40 or so feet to our booth I could watch her entire walk. Memories of her in the student union flooded back to me as I watched her mini skirted thighs firmly quiver with each proud stride of her high heeled legs. Her miniskirt rested safely above the thigh display and it was a struggle for me to lift my eyes to her chest and finally her wryly smiling face. I had quickly passed over the obviously braless breasts moving so nice and gently beneath the tight corporate golf shirt. My immediate impression as that never had the corporate logo been enfolded in such a pretty wrapper.

I greeted her as she bussed my cheek and I inhaled her warm scent that gave my dick a jolt.

"No trouble finding the place."

"Actually no, a lot of the departments come here for after work drinks."

After the waitress took Sally's drink order and left, I took one of her hands, and said.

"I see your after hours dress style hasn't changed. Braless and probably no underwear. Looks like you are ready to drop down at a seconds notice. Not that I'm complaining but hardly the attire for a meeting to explain how you have changed."

"I see your point Boss but it's also a meeting with an old treasured lover and when I dressed for tonight I was feeling nostalgic."

"Well your nostalgic dress would give the Pope a hard on for sure. I am also reminded of the fact that lack of attraction for one another was never our problem now was it?"

"Nope. It was my inability to stay faithful to just one man and the reason we are here tonight. I have to talk about some painful stuff and when I'm done I hope that we can at least be friends. Friends and lovers if possible but at least friends. Now let me get some shit off my chest."

Sally then proceeded to bare her soul as instructed by her counselor. She went into detail about several guys before me, a potential fiancé after me and one husband punctuated randomly by cheating with her old QB boyfriend, my cousin, eight to ten one night stands, a guidance counselor and an unknown number in several large gang bangs.

"So, to summarize, I have been basically a cheating slut for most of my adult life. Then two years ago I had a serious shock when my lifestyle choices put me in a situation in which I could have been seriously injured or even killed. It was so bad that my parents threatened to have me committed unless I agreed to enter a strict counseling program. I did and ever since I have been trying to make reparations and hopefully rebuild my life. I can now see just how fucked up I was and how I have hurt you, others I loved and also myself. I know it's asking a lot but I'm asking for your forgiveness."

I was thoughtful for a minute before answering.

"Of course I forgive you. Forgiveness is easy and to tell you the truth, I forgave you when you sent me that letter of apology years ago. Forgetting what you did, that's an entirely different matter. For instance, the way you're dressed tonight. I and every red blooded man who sees you wants to fuck you. Now, judging from your past history I'd wager to say that it wouldn't take too much to get between those luscious thighs of yours to do just that. If you were going out dressed like that and we were a couple, how much confidence would you think I would have in your potential for fidelity?"

"I know, I know it was a mistake and I haven't been dressing like this it was just because it was you and I was so glad you had agreed to meet with me and now I've fucked it up."

I could tell she was on the verge of tears and so I took her hands and held her for a second.

"No you didn't fuck up anything Sally. It's that you've got this stunning sexuality and you have to be careful in displaying it or the consequences could be catastrophic."

"What does it do to you?"

"You know damn well. I want to fuck you right here on this bench seat in front of the whole restaurant. That's what it does to me. It doesn't encourage me to get to know you again as a person and over time grow to trust and love you as a life long partner. No, fucking, sucking and a lot of skin to skin contact is what I want. How about you?"

"Before I answer I don't know where to categorize this."

Turning my head towards hers she devoured my mouth as her tongue tangled with and played with mine. Our kiss went on for several long minutes and was interrupted finally by a chorus of applause led by our server. Modestly embarrassed we took a break and waved to the crowd.

Yes we did go back to her apartment and yes we did fuck a number of quite memorable times. I'm also sure that it was obvious to each other that our bedroom repertoires had expanded from our late teenage years. However our ability to provide pure and simple pleasure was greatly expanded. It was that simple lovemaking that closed out the evening which was the keystone event.

After a sensually delightful shower during which we got to reacquaint each other with our respective bodies, she drove me back to my car so I could go home to dress for work. Once alone I wondered, as I'm sure did she, just where in the hell this relationship was going. On the purely physical side she would rank in the upper 9.0's. On the trust side maybe about a 5. So, the question was, could I have a sexual relationship with a woman I could only trust about half of the time? The answer to that was sure. She's a great piece of ass so date her, fuck her and have fun without commitment until she cheats again.

And so began my second relationship with Sally. I was honest with her about my trust issues and she said she understood. For the first month we said nothing about exclusivity but we in fact were. Then one Thursday we were sharing a sandwich for lunch when she brought it up.

"So Jake Burgess from Sales stopped by my desk the morning and said he has tickets for the race on Saturday and asked me if I want to go. We haven't made any plans for this weekend yet but I told him that I was seeing you and that we would probably be hanging out this weekend. Was that OK?"

"Sure, we probably will be hanging out if you want to and that explains why he was trying to peddle his Nascar tickets to me. Want to go?"

By now she was sitting on my lap and ready to lay one on me.

"I used to really love Nascar but I don't need those high pitched motors to get mine reved up. Your friend that is poking my butt right now is all I need and a weekend in your bed is sort of what I had in mind. Maybe a pool break to bask in the sun every so often and then back in to get reacquainted."

And that's exactly what we did from Friday night through Sunday evening. At sunset we took a walk in the park after a weekend of loving.