All Comments on 'Fial's Temple Service'

A striking story. You describe Fial's thoughts and feelings so well that we see ourselves in her and really care for her. You entrance us to accept the inevitability of the coupling just as Fial is entranced herself. As in all good fairy tales, although the appearance of the big strong man may be fantastical, Fial's emotional response is realistic and compelling. The way you constantly weave in the presence of Fial's boyfriend, in the pew and in her thoughts, really contrasts the everyday life we have to live—with its everyday joys and happinesses—with the ecstasy that maybe sometimes comes upon us and touches us "in places that Cullen would never reach." For me, the most human, most compelling image of all is the final one, of Fial fiercely caring for her dark haired little girl.

So, anyway, very well done. A corker of a first story. I hope it's just the first of many.

Amazing story. So very descriptive and well written. You leave the reader in no doubt of what Fial is thinking and feeling and a brilliant refreshing ending, as you very rarely here the aftermath.