Finding the Perfect Fit Pt. 22

First Day Back Home

It's so weird being back in my old room but it doesn't feel the same. There's a few bags of clothing Ty and Brooke had outgrown that are sitting in the corner; still needing to be donated to a thrift store. But it's more than that, more than most of my crap being in boxes and my desk sitting along the opposite wall from where it had been. It's weird and I have to wonder how much I should unpack or just leave so it will be ready for what I'm hoping will be the final move for some time.

Dad showed up early on the Move Out day, posters proclaiming it all over campus and I spent the previous night packing, blaring music to keep Donna's shitty playlist at bay. And of course, Dad got along with Donna more than I had within the whole year in just a few minutes. She even mentioned I changed her tire once and he just nodded, saying it was a mechanic's sacred duty to fix anything on a car with a straight face, leaving Donna confused until he cracked up and she joined in.

Once the mattress and box spring were carried out and most of the boxes loaded up, I made sure to wish Donna well and she gave me similar good tidings, pausing for a second as my Dad walked by but just thanked me before going back to her own frantic packing. I'm sure it was for giving her the go ahead to cheat during the winter finals and really, as much as we didn't get along, I didn't want her to fail.

Within a few hours, my whole school life was packed and loaded up and I was following Dad back home, the AC in my car working just fine, which was good because the day was already hot at 11 am. Everyone pitched in to get my stuff back into the house and I was finally able to lay down on my bed and look up at a more familiar ceiling, one that had some tape residue from when I put a poster above my bed of some hot chick I'd bought at the mall. It stayed until I tore it down in a fit of rage during my breakup with Cass, me ripping the bikini clad woman to shreds and kicking the paper about my room. I felt guilty after; she didn't deserve that.

I ate lunch with my family sometime later, and even though Brooke and Ty wanted to hang out, I told them it'd have to wait 'cause I needed a nap. Being back for what was still a temporary duration had me drained and the move was not helping any. Plus, I was dealing with the aftermath of finals, which I was sure I had passed but those doubts still nagged at me when I thought about school.

Sitting here on my new laptop and typing, I'm reminded that Jamie is going to be off limits this summer and the amount of bummer that inspires is starting to hit me. He'd been texting me throughout the day, Tom helping to get him moved back and Jamie had to reassure me that it was going to be fine; his shithead father wasn't going to bring him down.

We both were going to be working two jobs over the summer and checking my bank account, I've already got more money than ever before...but fuck, I'm looking around at apartment prices and I got two months worth of rent and that's not counting for any furnishing. Or food. Fun definitely isn't in the budget either 'cause I don't know how much internet is going to be. Okay, started a list in another document of crap that we're going to need.

Tomorrow I go over my car top to bottom to get back into the groove of shop work before going back to Dick's. Then to the gas station, and at some point during all of that, I'll find time to text Jamie. Speaking of, I just asked how he was doing -- which was being back at his shithead father's place and he sent me pictures of a Metallica and Rush poster side by side.

"Had never been allowed to have posters before but I'm making this space my own," his text read.

I smirked, sending him support and hoping it went well. Looking around, I saw I had none of my own and once more felt bad for having destroyed the innocent pin up lady, even though it was over a year ago.

I've gotta hit up the mall and get something new to make this time here different than being in high school. 'Cause, really, this isn't going to be home for long. I've got a plan for the future. Hell, I've got a future! I'm going to get a place with Jamie, continue going to school until something sticks, and if all else fails, there was always Dick's to make sure I could pay the bills.

I feel so stupid typing this but I guess I'm an adult now? I'm 19 so that's probably a little late but... I've got this. Like, going to college felt like a big deal but surviving it while working, managing money and making time for Jamie made it all real. And now I'm being adult enough to give Jamie his space, to acknowledge his adulthood enough to know he wasn't ready to move in with me just yet. I don't have to be happy about any of that but simply have to learn to work around it. I wonder if that's how Mom and Dad managed to raise me while both were working; you just compromise until life goes on.

And being an adult means being able to put up posters if you want, dammit! It's going to be a long summer but I'll make it. Plus I should probably text Min Seo so I've got someone to hang out with! I will say, one benefit I've forgotten about living at home is having food without needing to worry about it. Supper's being made and I don't have to pay for it or cook! Hell yeah!

June 1

I'm already tired and it's only been like two days of working both jobs. This does not bode well. Getting back into the swing of things at the shop has taken a bit longer than I'd like but oil changes are an easy way to relearn. With it being summer, there's always a steady stream of tune-ups before longer trips so I'm taking on the lighter jobs while the regulars get to dive into the busted shit. I'm not complaining; I don't have to be bent over the front of a car for hours on end this way!

Biggest issue was when my hands were all fucked up with grease when Jamie texted me, and he had blown up my phone until I handed it over to my Dad, who took pictures of my dirty hands and sent it to him. Of course, Dad started scrolling through our conversation and I had to take the phone away, him just cackling when I demanded to know what he read. Then Dick came over asking about the ruckus and it's a fuckin' mess.

Later, we worked out that Jamie couldn't expect me to return his texts before 2 pm when I'm at the shop. It's still kind of weird knowing we'd fucked in the back lot but it's more of a curious thought when I'm on the clock rather than something to get worked up over. At least Jamie's library job seems pretty laid back, giving him plenty of time to text me musings about various things while I'm elbows deep in the guts of cars and trucks, having to deal with this new digital shit and glad I wasn't in the farming equipment business as the new tractors, according to Dick, were locked down with computers. I wanted no part of that.

The gas station job is pretty mindless and that's usually when I text Jamie the most, but Dairy Queen has been commanding more of his attention lately, so he couldn't reply and I hate it. I hate that any conversation we have is fractured with hours between instead of the minutes we have once grown accustomed to. And now I've finally realized that getting horny means I'm on my own. Sure, I've got dildos now but come on! That's not the same thing as having Jamie laying on my bed! Mostly 'cause I don't have anything to fuck with said dildos. I can fuck myself but I got nothing akin to his sweet ass and I need to think about something else 'cause that ass is months away - fuccckkk!

June 6

Min Seo asked if we could hang out tomorrow afternoon and I agreed in an instant, Sunday being one of the days I had the front half off. But that prompted a text to Jamie, asking what the rules are now. 'Cause I've been living the born-again virgin life for like a week and I don't like it. Sleeping alone sucks and the knowledge Jamie is close enough I could easily drive to his place but still wanting distance is maddening.

Jamie informed me that as far as he cared, the rules hadn't changed. Kissing and only the lightest of petting along with pictures.

"'Cause I'm horny enough to fuck a Crime and Punishment," I responded to him while claiming I was close to humping one of the cars at work into scrap.

Jamie had not been doing a whole lot better than me on that note and was sure to express it.

"But won't seeing pictures of me making out with Min Seo just make you hornier?" I asked after getting ready to head to the gas station, the thought occurring to me while getting ready to face the brutal summer heat again.

"Gen, I'm not sure it's possible for me to get blue balled anymore than I already am. I just want you to know that I love and trust you. And I want to refill my spunk bank 'cause it's empty after last semester." I giggled at that, replying I was honored to have fucked his whack-off material out of him. It was honestly kind of impressive in that I had been enough for him to not need to jack it much, if he was telling the truth.

God I didn't need this conversation to happen before work!

June 7

When church bells were ringing all over town I parked at the mall to meet up with Min Seo, wanting to get away from everything for a while. My family had adapted to me being back but I hadn't done so good in doing the same. My limited time off was usually spent typing in my room or hanging out in the living room, trying to keep Ty and Brooke's prying eyes off of this document or the story I've been working on over the past year. Mom and Dad give me space but they fail to understand I don't care about the drama and gossip of the shop as it was just a job for me, but it was a major part of their lives for at least 20 years.

I didn't want to be bothered by any of that as I jogged from the lot to the mall, wanting to get out of the heat but at least I was in shorts and a lighter shirt rather than the heavier shop wear. I'd already gotten two more scars, one running up my right thumb from a new SUV and the second on my left forearm from a late 90's Ford truck; one of the ugliest fuckers I'd worked on and it felt the same about me judging by how nasty the cut was.

Spotting a few figures through the tinted glass, I opened the door and stepped into the cooled interior with the high ceilings, glad to be back. Min Seo was waiting beside the mall map, a shy smile crossing her face as I greeted her with a hug. I hadn't seen Min Seo in what felt like forever. Hell, I think it has been months! Her arms around me was a reminder of the last time we saw each other, of being in the park and her admitting what she wanted.

"Glad to see ya!" I said as Min Seo stepped back and looked up at me, making my heart flutter but that was just due to someone being close. "How ya doing?" We started walking towards the main halls, my arm around Min Seo's shoulder, keeping her close and not minding the weird looks thrown our way. I was with someone who reminded me I was more than just a cog in two different machines.

"Been busy. But I am glad to see you," Min Seo said and nudged my hand off her shoulder but only smiled when I glanced over at her. Once again, I was lost when it came to her but I didn't mind today. I needed this time with someone who was here and shared at least one common interest, even if it was as vain as looking pretty. "Hungry?"

"Fuck yeah!" We walked along to the food court, Min Seo commenting that she wanted to hit up a clothing store while I was on the lookout for any place that sold posters as I was still looking for something new to put on my walls.

"I wanted to make that Cid cosplay for you but got too busy with school. Would you still be interested in going to the anime convention later?" she asked. I blanked out for too long before remembering previous conversations and shrugging.

"Sure! Just let me know when so I can ask off." Finally we got to the food court and I instantly went for the pizza while Min Seo went off for noodles, standing in line until I finally got my greasy, cheesy goodness and joined her at a table.

Not a whole lot of talking happened as I chowed down, not having eaten anything else today. I did admire Min Seo, who's makeup was perfect and her pale blue shirt was low cut enough I could get a healthy dose of cleavage. Sure, it wasn't anything on Jamie's but I wasn't going to turn down getting a peek considering she was so obviously showing off. Her just-above-the-knee skirt was light and breezy, a white lacy material I'd love to see Jamie in. Which made me think about him in a bride's get-up and I had to stop that train of thought, not wanting to get worked up again, especially in public.

"What are you lookin' for today?" I asked. Min Seo shrugged in response, watching as a woman pushed a carriage beside our table, a baby sleeping within despite the general noise.

"Just wanted to get out for a while. I could help you put together an outfit?" I shrugged in return, interested in the idea but bummed out at being unable to show Jamie for so long.

Once we were finished eating we got moving about the mall, avoiding gangs of teenagers who were hanging out, freed from school for the time being. I'd never really had many chances to do what they were, usually working over the summer instead and only coming here a few times to blow my cash.

I led her into a general media sort of store that seemed to sell anything that had licensed characters on it, along with a bunch of video games, used DVDs and Blu Rays. I flipped through their posters and found nothing that got my attention while Min Seo wandered off, looking at the manga section and similarly coming up empty. We got a few looks from the people behind the counter but left, Min Seo leading us to a massive JC Penny's that took up one end of the mall.

There were less guys inside but the isles were still plenty full of people, and Min Seo was sure to begin shopping in earnest. She wanted to see me in a skirt and I obliged, growing more amused as I was taking Jamie's usual role when we hung out.

"Is there anything you think your boyfriend will like?" She asked me and I stopped to think that over, figuring anything I'd tried on would be to Jamie's liking. And skirts on either of us allowed easy access to dick or 'gina. And booty, can't forget that! In the end I got a lacy, breezy thing like Min Seo was wearing and a shorter, tighter one along with some black long stockings that were cloth instead of nylon. She informed me they were more for fall but it was fine to buy them now while they were in stock. More makeup was bought too, not nearly as much as last time but enough to top off. I still wanted to introduce her to Jamie but that was obviously impossible right now.

After that I hit up a Hot Topic if only to see what posters they had, finding only stoner humor, cartoon characters, and metal bands. There wasn't even a cheesecake pin up! I left in disgust, Min Seo looking very out of her element while in the dark store.

Fresh out of ideas, I asked if she had anywhere else to go and Min Seo suggested that we get out of there in favor of someplace a little quieter to hang out. I'd be lying if I didn't mention that my pulse quickened at the merest suggestion of seeing any sort of action. I asked if she had someplace in mind and she nodded, giving me an address I was completely unfamiliar with.

"It is by where I live, a walking path I visit during the morning and evening when it's cooler," she stated as I checked the time and found it was around 2, meaning it was getting to the hottest part of the day. But still, being able to hang out with someone before I had to head in for a six to ten o'clock shift at the gas station beat spending it alone.

So we walked outside into the blinding heat and Min Seo said she would see me there, and a couple of screaming kids ran past us and slammed into the closed glass doors, their cries sending me quickly back to my car. Mall time operated at a faster rate and if I was there too long, it got on my nerves, turning escape into extreme annoyance. Still, I'd gotten something out of this trip that I could share with Jamie and even enjoy myself, so that was a win.

The drive was close to half an hour until I ended up in a part of town that was completely unfamiliar to me, a Korean Christian Church cluing me in as to why. Sure, some of the stores had signs with writing I couldn't read but everything looked normal like the rest of the town. I figure at some point Min Seo's parents had moved here into this little community and got on with living their lives just like everyone else.

Eventually I found a little parking lot that had a slightly faded metal sign with a map showing where the path went and a list of rules, Min Seo's car waiting for me. We locked our cars and got walking, the shade a relief after so little time under the sun's glare. Winter was so far away right then, the idea of being cold so distant I couldn't comprehend it. Of course, I know I had the same thought about being hot over the winter.

I wasn't surprised when Min Seo took my hand as we walked under the slightly rustling canopy, countless streams of light raining down over us and the path. There were some distant sounds of cars but otherwise we were alone in the middle of the day, an oddity in the city.

"Hey, if we do anything I'll need to take a picture and send it to Jamie, kay?" She nodded, tugging me off of the pavement onto a barely-there trail that led deeper into the trees. Eventually we came down to a small clearing by a stream, a few logs set up around the blackened remains of a campfire. I was surprised to see this here, figuring such things happened out in the country rather than within city limits.

"Some kids come out here to play and drink but usually later in the day." Giving my hand a light squeeze, Min Seo looked up at me again and there was no mistaking the want in her pretty face. She was asking me without speaking and my answer was to pull out my phone, opening the camera and standing beside her.

"Just gotta get this first." I once more slung an arm over her shoulder, drawing Min Seo close and she surprised me by reaching up and planting a kiss on my cheek. Even still, I snapped the picture and turned to kiss her lightly on the lips, tasting what I think was strawberry. Another picture was taken and I sent both to Jamie before tucking my phone away in my back pocket.

"Okay," I breathed and wrapped my arms around her for the second time that day, not minding the heat as her hands got to the curve in my waist. Having her here was a marvel and her lips grazed mine before pressing more firmly, parting just enough for my tongue to slip in her mouth. A moan sounded and I took her ass in my hands, giving a squeeze that was too rough but Min Seo only melted further in my grasp.

I hungered for this and the fire that had been laying low roared back to life, demanding I get us both naked and fuck right there in the middle of the woods. Instead I broke away from Min Seo's lips, my forehead resting against hers' while I sucked down hot air, the slight breeze doing nothing to cut past the heat.

"Gen, I, I..." Min Seo breathed, still holding me close as I grappled with the demands being made by the roaring fire building higher and higher within. With effort, I took my hands off of her ass and stepped back, still close enough I could feel her elevated breathing.

"That's as far as I can go," I said, hating every word but needing to say it, both for her and myself. So, I was surprised when Min Seo took my hands and pressed against me, her lips finding mine again. Our hands tied up, Min Seo was free to reengage, the pace slower, my own demands giving way to her soft touch.

"Gen..." Barely a word, almost a sigh but Min Seo looked up at me, asking for something with her expression alone but I couldn't provide it. "Thank you." I wasn't expecting that and her following embrace caught me off guard but I returned it, glad to be here with her.