All Comments on 'Fingerprints on My Heart'

I'm such a big fan of yours! 5 stars, of course.

Incredibly well done. Sensual and raw and emotional. I will read this over and over.

A great read. Held my interest from start to finish.

Well done Chloe! Worth the wait. Sensual and appealing.

You're writing holds my attention. This one was sexy yet kind of sad in a way. Still up to par though. Keep writing.

TBC

You really shine in the first time genre, and as far as I'm concerned, you can keep getting your cherry popped over and over for my reading pleasure. The descriptions are good and you really drag it out when the main event happens. Well done.

Followed by ten pages of descriptive sexual activity.

Is this a record?

Lue

Ps: Your resident language pedant could only find

one rampant apostrophe and two occasions on which

'to' was incorrectly spelled 'too'. All were on Page two.

So that's to, too and two. (Aren't homophones fun?)

Thoroughly enjoyed it.

Fertile imagination.......I was pleasantly engaged throughout the story...I have had many dreams of being involved with an Asian woman in just such a situation. The mind is the largest sex organ in the human body, and your writings made mine grow and harden throughout the story. I will continue to look for your stories here and wherever they are published.

Thank you!

You're a master (should that be mistress?) of First Time stories. Every one of your first time stories I've read is outstanding and this is no exception. What always gets me is that every one of your characters is different and their personalities are so vividly done. Keep them coming, please. And us :)

Thank you. Five starts from me. Of course.

Very good, very exciting, very disturbing

I certainly have a mess to clean up after reading that one! You bring a lot of fantasies about Asian girls to life. . .

Have been a silent reader for a long time but wanted to sign up and express ,y appreciation for how much you seem to have developed as a writer in terms of the sophistication of your characters' viewpoints. This was exquisite to read but painful, and visceral, and terrifying, too.

Many thanks for a wonderful story.

Too long, too many pages of sex acts, too much repetition (how many times will she say that he's married?) and not much of a plot.

I love your writing, your stories. I wish Literotica enabled searches for women authors. It's interesting to see what interests women, rather than taking a guys word for it, not that guys can't write a good story. Thanx again.

I read stories from long time as a silent reader but this forced me for a comment

Such creations are rare. And i realy loved it .its like ne of a kind

to your writing. I'm sure there's no cure, and I wouldn't take it if there were. Thanks.

Hot as fuck, but also so raw and true to life that it's clear you either lived it or truly understand human nature. You are a hella talented writer, and honestly I wouldn't be surprised if you wrote novels when you're not gifting us with your work! Thank you :)

Chloe T has got it going on! The narrator seems authentically teenage girl--smart, horny, introspective, giving, and aware of the contradictions of her affair. But, her immaturity doesn't allow her to stop. She is human, vulnerable and very likable in spite of her weakness. My instincts are to protect her and kick Nick in the ass. He's the adult here and a fool to think he can keep his lust a secret. When it comes out, and it will, Natasha will do plenty of ass kicking for both of us. Too bad his kids will be hurt. Kudos to the author for her sparkling prose and for her insights into the mind of a young woman on the cusp of adulthood.

I wish there were a few more stars for rating this. Fantastic!

5-star story, but it's a bit of a stretch for the April Fool's contest.

April Fools' Day winner! Well done. This was a good story and it wasn't even your best.

September Blue remains your masterpiece to date. Unfortunately there was no competition for it to win.

Lue

Definitely has my vote for April Fools day contest.

Chloe: How magnificent, yet bittersweet. You have a real talent for communicating feelings and passions. That can't be all made-up. Nick is a selfish cad. Poor Kylie exploited, but also an exploiter. Can neither one help themselves?

Chloe, in my opinion, you are the best author, bar none of the greats of literature, at expressing your character's feelings. Your stories have meanings beyond the genre of erotica, yet are the most erotic of all. I love all your works, but this is the most complete and poignant. I am your fan. Thank you and keep on writing!

First, thank you, thank you, thank you to all of you who read, enjoyed and voted om "Fingerprints on my Heart: for the April Fools story competition. It came first, and while I wrote it, it was all of you reading and voting on my story that propelled it to first place and I'd like to say thanks to you all. Without all of you, it wouldn't be there and I can't tell you what a thrill it was to see that my story won. So thanks all over again to every single one of you who read this.

Now, if you read this and enjoyed it and you haven't read my stories before and you want to read more, I'd suggest "A Teddy Bear for Christmas," "The Wolf with the Red Roses," "September Blue" and "Sometimes Harder is Best." "Chinese Takeout" is along the same lines but it's a series and it's also a work-in-progress. I'd make a plug for "Strawberry Chapter 4" as well but that's more humor and sex rather than First Time romance. I think you'll like it of you read it through.

And thanks for all the comments. Especially for those of you for who this was a first comment ever. That means so much to me that you'd do that, so thank you all over again. I love it that you felt that deeply and enjoyed my little story that much.

Thank you all over again, all of you ..... Chloe

I read this today, april first...

thank you Chloe! another fantastic story, extremely well told.

i did think that it was a bit repetitive at one point, and then was surprised to realize that the repetition only enhanced the excitement, and the tale.

the sign of a true and excellent author.

again, thank you,

/s

So fucking hot, Chloe. I love your stories. ;-)

I love this story it felt so very genuine and real, honest. The only thing I didn't like was that the man was married. That's just a personal thing though I'm very much against cheating. In every other aspect this is a great story and you won the contest, congrats!

Chloe....you are one incredible erotic writer! Detailed, well constructed story line, and TONS OF kissing .....-I love kissing - You probably can't write fast enough but I can wait. For me, you are no longer in the "Top Three" of my favorite Lit writer list, a very tough demanding list I may add. Nope, you are now No# 1!!!! Thank you for the enjoyment that you have provided me, with not only this BRILLENT piece, but of all the others I have read. 10 STARS!!!!

A really erotic story, and I cared for the character and wondered what would become of her.Ft

Click on her biography and see her pic. Makes your mouth water, and appreciate this story even more.

That was amazing, it's easy to see why this won first place.

The sex was amazing, though by the time they were on their second round in the office I was barely skimming whole paragraphs to get to the moments between. I particularly like how you handled her introspection after he dropped her at home. You could see the long spiral down that she was about take, how she would become disillusioned. From that point on I savored every word. This is the line that slayed me:

"Use me," I breathe. "I want your cock to use me .... Use my cunt...."

My words excite him as I know they will.

For me, that was the moment where the tragedy is born. That was the moment that the seed of cynicism sprouted.

Look forward to reading more of your stories.

Oh, Chloe, how I wish you'd taken the time to proofread. Breathe in and out is different from taking a breath. Missing words, missing letters, oh Cloe. See what I men?

...over time to proof read. I'm getting better at it. Sort of. When I'm not rushing. LOL. Too and to is always a bad one. Breathe and breath? Usually I get that now too. C. :)

This would get a six if there was one. This has to be the best story i've read on literotica. can't wait to read more of your writings!

You did a great job. I really liked your story.

By far the most intense story i have ever read - my entire body Tingled While Reading it. It was incredible to almost feel what she is feeling. 10 stars if possible !!

great as ever

looking forward to the return of your regular runs

has been missing the unfurling of the existing stories

People write best when they have had life's experiences. It shows through and this story is fabulously empathetic for many of us,

I gave it 5 stars anyway. For 10 years I was a "Nick" to someone's "Kylie." Not totally parallel in many ways, but your exposition of the conflicting emotions Kylie went through was painfully real for me. If you created those emotions without having experienced them yourself, you are quite talented indeed.

Sometimes I prefer empathic as well as emotional storytelling, while other times I prefer when sensuously detailed yet unashamedly dirty; you have provided me with the best of both. And it was done so while grounded in a believable reality even if the character was altering her perception of that reality. Your five stars were well earned, and I would have given more if possible. Great job.

Please continue this story! Did she ever go to the clinic? Morning after pill? I kind of thought Nick would've brought one with him or something. I'd like for her to see how painful being the "other woman" really is.....believe me, I know!! It's a heartbreaking realization when you get over the initial rush....knowing that you are & will always be number 3 behind the wife & kids. Always. Nothing can or will change that. Being home alone at night while imagining the worst of what your lover & his wife are doing. Even if they're just sleeping, that's more than you'll ever get. The soul crushing feeling when you find out your lover & his wife are expecting a baby together. Aching because HE has a life while YOURS remains in limbo, obsessively checking your phone, praying he's called or texted. Such a shitty waste of time. I'd love to see her wake up & get a boyfriend who loves & cherishes her, making it easier to cut ties with Nick.

Wonderful story with great writing, unbelievable pacing. Best I've read at literotica !

This is the best story I've read on literotica, and I've been reading on this site for YEARS. I kept thinking about it even after I was done, and I'll be re-reading. Well done!!!

love the story such an amazing fantasy cum true

Thanks again for all your comments and in answer to the requests (and there were a few offline as well), I've added a Part 2 ("Love Hurts" - from the old Nazareth song) to my list of stories to write, along with a Part 3 "Don't Come Back for Me" (Christina Perri) - going to try and turn this one into a full length novel-type story.

Going be sad for her when she thinks back to that first night in his office.....at some point she's going to wonder why he'd have lube in his desk drawer. Either he lied about never doing anal before or he had it there fully expecting to get some anal in his office at some point....a secretary maybe? A co-worker, an intern? I'd like to see Kylie walk in on him with a woman NOT his wife so she could see that she's not the first & won't be the last....nothing special at all.

From the moment she said "Stop", it was no longer just an older man taking advantage of an innocent teenager-- it was rape.

I think you misread that. The only time she says no is in answer to a question. Later on she wants to say "No. Stop" but no words come out. It's all in the context of what's said.

I love and hate reading stories like this... I love it, for hopefully obvious reasons, it's a great story, attention holding writing, raw and pure emotion, erotic literature... I hate it because, even as a man who could find very little to relate to a teenage girl, I find myself intertwining my emotions with hers, I always emotionally involve myself with characters, be it movies, books, or even erotic literature online. As I saw the effects of her actions hit her, I so desperately begged her to say "No" to the repeated question "Are you okay?" To give the truth, that she isn't, and as her tears started to fall, I felt my own building, I know you've said a tentative yes to a part 2 and 3 Chloe, and as a new reader of yours, I hope they're just as enthralling from start to finish, but damn do i hope she gets a happy ending... somehow... someway.

I would have given this story 5 stars because it is a very good story but for me the repetition just got old. I started skipping paragraphs because I already knew what they were going to say. Taking two pages off the story and shortening the repeated parts of the story would have been much better.

Thanks, that's a very valid critique. Guess my problem is when I'm writing something I fall in love with my own words and I have to back away a while before I can come back and edit it that ruthlessly. And when you're writing to a competition deadline, that's hard. I've been reading some of my earlier stories and thinking exactly that - too much repetition and filler and I need to really work on tightening them up. Thanks again for that, I really appreciate the feedback.

I actually liked the repetitions... part of the atmosphere.. show the feelings building up, but also reflect well what might be going on in Kylie's head... the complex emotions and feelings...

They also contribute to creating that sense of expectation... teasing, build up before release...

Thank you for this great story!

... this insight into 'her' side of things.

The 'male point of view' is so predominant in most stories, never mind erotic ones. And even when it is claimed that they are from a woman's point of experience one has one's doubts.

|This one of yours rings true, and in much earlier years, I saw female friends of mine get trapped in the same situation. Knowing the guy was a cheat and would never leave the stability of his marriage but they hung on just hoping.

I agree that @ 11 pages it is overlong and got somewhat repetitive - but with some editing, it is a terrific story. And as I said - from 'HER' side of things too.

Thank you

I gave the 'anal' sections a miss.

He was really just after the 'thrill' and novelty of it since he kept claiming that her vaginal reception was so 'tight'. Exploitative already.

However, who am I to baulk at such things since I read that the Xtian church promoted it as an alternative to the use of contraceptive devices or methods for many a year.

Youre a bit of a twat. Thank you chloe thank you for the girls point of view. From what I can read it reads no different from a mans story and building the mans ego. Plum thick cock ow ow hes stretching me I love it. The narration could use some trimming. There is repetitive thought and sometimes in the same paragraph what was said in the first three lines becomes six even though it should have stayed with three. Less is more in writing otherwise its like listening someone tell you over and over what theyve already said while driving to drive their point home as if you cant understand it the first time they said it. Other than that. The sex is sexy the writing entertaining the circumstances an interesting fantasy but a bit too long.

I really enjoyed this one, you captured the feelings of Kylie very nicely. If you're self-editing, great job on the grammar and spelling. You only had a very few minor errors. I agree that it's very hard to hack and slash your own stories. That's where an outside editor can come in very handy.

This acutely brought back bittersweet memories of my own incredible crushes. I had forgotten how it felt and you made me remember just what it was like to be so young and inexperienced yet with a heart-stopping, breathless, mental/physical craving, fantasizing and desire - truly the agony and the ecstasy of nothing-like-it first time.

Pretty hot story. Not a fast stroke story. Remarkably real.

Definitely reminds me of why I am so very leery of dating or sleeping with women who are virgins or have had just one partner their entire lives. She means all the things she says about what she wants to give him while completely invalidating it minutes later. Plus she's terrible at communicating and semi-deliberately does things to not let him know various bits of vital information like "I've never done any of this before" until much later.

For what it's worth, this is the first story I've read on Literotica that feels like it is a real thing, that gives me a feeling of the nexus between the visceral and the emotive sides of sexual intimacy.

Thank you for the journey.

It was truly moving.

You continue to rule the first time genre. So far I am definitely not bored. As I've said about your other stories, I hope you get your cherry popped over and over on Literotica.

I just realized I commented twice. I finally finished the last four pages.

Not a problem. I'm soooo glad you enjoyed it enough to come back and finish those last four pages. So right now, I'm working on (among others) a new story for the Literotica Nude Day Story Competition, "The Temptation of Sammi Woo." Another first time story, but not quite as romantic as "Fingerprints". When Sammi has her cherry popped, it's with a bang.

My favorite superhot story on Literotica. I feel like I looked into the window of a woman's heart and mind during the complicated lust/love dance with a man to whom she's wholly drawn. Please write more of these honest stories - the introspective stream of consciousness and feelings was phenomenal.

This is easily the hottest thing I've read on this site in recent memory.

I've been looking through your other work and was curious if you had anything with a hot Chinese guy? Most of the Asian male pieces I've read are written by non-Asians (and most don't write the Asian perspective well). Personal interest, but maybe something to consider if not!

Sitting across from my partner as I read your story, I soaked through my boxers with precum, and then I did it again when I read the last 1/3. Whoo, this was a great read. The cerebral Kylie and the base and physical Nick are no match for what is to surely come. I loved the tension between the erotic and the mundane.

I'm now on my way to search for more of your work.

Much love,

NB

Wow!!!

So hot and slowly told sexy story.....

Wonderful writing.

Please keep it up

I'll be hard for a week because of you.. lol

I love that you captured an honest experience of a young woman's inner experience - her thoughts and feelings as events happened. I wonder if men would treat women and girls differently if they understood the minds and hearts of their partners. There is joy and excitement, and fear and sadness and regret all rolled into one experience. Is it any wonder young people are not usually equipped to handle the complex flood of emotions connected to their first love affairs and sexual experiences? The way the narrator repeats herself frequently is a clever touch. At first, I thought that was the result of incomplete editing, but then I noticed the pacing and rhythm it creates, allowing the reader to connect to the timeframe of the event in the story (and mimicking the internal monologue of a person engaged in a masturbation fantasy). Well done.

And so erotic. Thank you.

you have a real gift!

If you enjoyed "Fingerprints on my Heart" then I think you'd also enjoy my new story "Summertime Sadness."

You have a truly, deeply amazing talent for carrying the reader on wave after swirling, churning, rhythmic, repeating - and yes, I'll say it - UNDULATING wave of heartfelt, courageously sincere and erotic poetry. ;-)

I'm normally drawn toward more prim and proper, well-structured, 'well-written' stories...with crafted, clever storyline and dialogue, with intellectual stimulation and frustration and drama, all in it's appointed place and such. So when I first read one of your pieces, "Summertime Sadness", I was caught off-guard. I left a comment about how it intrigued me deeply, but I wasn't sure if I 'liked' it. So you directed me to this one as well, and as I delved into this story I found it even more fascinating - and yes - still curiously unsettling...I mean it turned me on, without a doubt, but there were several times I found I needed to step back from it for awhile, to get my moorings about what was really going on. But then somewhere along the line I began to get what it is you were doing, what you do, as an erotic writer. I began to appreciate what you're seeking and creating. And once that happened I realized how delighted I was to find your particular voice, your experience and your gifts. So thank you for this.

I'll read your other works, one by one as I can find the time. But for now I only wish to offer a small bit of sincere, honest encouragement that 'You keep doing You'. Because it's working, as I'm sure you already know. But just sayin'...

Wonderful, perceptive, story...and soooo erotic!

A beautiful story.

My wife is Chinese and was a virgin many years ago when I married her. Thanks for helping me to relive what a great night that was. Her pussy was so incredibly tight, I only got off about 10 strokes before I came!

No romance, only first time hardcore sex. So do not put that romance on the description of your story. I do not know why this story have been rated high just because of some cheap descriptive hardcore.

And of course it's hardcore sex. That's what most Literotica readers are here for and it's what I write. Honestly, if you want soft fluffy romance with no sex, why are you here reading my stories on Literotica? ROTFLMAO. So okay, a hint. Harlequin are good at what you're looking for. My stories by contrast are packed with romantically minded Chinese girls who succumb to male lust and desire and then find themselves engaged in mind-glowingly hot and explicitly described sex. Oh well, can't please everyone all the time.

Romance and the emotional and seductive processes building up tension can be far more erotic than the final acts of physical contact skin to skin and penis into vagina.

The quantity and length of the OOOs, AAAHs, etc is not necessarily the best measure of a story's eroticism. I was glad to see that you had softened them a bit with this story. (Not so many Capitals.)

I don't agree with the Anonymous comment that there was no romance, only hard-core sex. Sure, it was more lust than love, but the whole story had enough romance for one posted in the First Time category.

Lue

Right as always Lue. OOOOH I have go to tone down those oooohhhssss but AAAH it's so hard. Oh well.

Well written, imaginative, and certainly not too long. Loved the anal insertion, a lifelong predilection of mine. Chloe, if you like anal, give us more. I didn't keep track, but my impression from this story is for far fewer than the usual apostrophic insertions into plurals, and only one or two destructions of the verb "to breathe" or of the noun "breath". Proud of you. Love to read you.

Maybe it was my Asian interest, maybe it reminded me of my own life, but your well written dialog and excerpts held me close. If an atta girl is not too much of a man thing to say take it, if so then please accept the accolades that will come your way for this erotic story!

Enjoyed this for the emotional depth you attempted but mostly for the raunchy eroticism, particularly the anal sex and facial cumshot, two of my favorite obsessions, and especially refreshing coming from a female author. The first person limited the objective description, of course, but it was still very arousing. My only reservation is the length, which lends itself to repetition and invites a reader to skip passages. Splitting the piece into two or three shorter segments would eliminate this problem and remove the implausibility of some superstud coming three times in one encounter. (Was it only three times? I lost count.)

I was unaware of your work until recently, when you listed my "Asian Studies Part Two" as a favorite. Thank you for that and for thereby introducing me to your talent. Look forward to reading more of your stuff.

Chloe, you are not a "wannabe writer." I've read a lot of erotic fiction and you write better than 99% of them. For that matter, as good or better than most writers in the mainstream genres. I've only read one author who even comes close, Helen of Helen.org. You and Helen possess that ability and creativity to write tasteful but incredibly romantic erotic fiction and go deep into the emotional side of relationships without it being a distraction and at the same time writing tasteful but incredibly erotic sex scenes.

You know how to invoke inner emotion like no writer of erotica I have read.

The problem is it was a 4 or even 6 page story stretched out to 11 pages due to how insanely long and detailed the sex scenes were.

This story enlights impressively both sides of the coin when having an affair, particularly with a married partner. This ambivalence of feelings between passion, longing on one hand and the incredible sadness and loneliness,the feeling of being used on the other hand, as the protagonist knows for sure that this story will never have a happy ending.

Great story !

sehr gut geschrieben , mit sehr viel Gefühl und Details

I read this on April 1 accidentially. It's by far the best i've ever read here. Thank you so very much. I love you

Every story of Chloe’s that I read is a true gem. How I wish I had discovered her earlier! Anyway, still many more to go in her portfolio!

It is so good that i almost forget to breathe when I read your stories.

It’s as if I am there - amazing!!

What a worthy read. Loved every paragraph. Loved how you ended it. Awesome job.

They were not great characters, but you’re a great storyteller. The descriptions me feel like I’m there. I love your work.

You have very descriptive stories. They really ignite a man's imagination. If I was younger...... Well done

Fingerprints on My Heart is romantic story telling at its finest, a beautifully written love story by an excellent author. If anyone needs proof that plot, romance, and erotic love are perfectly compatible, then this story is it- a magnificent literary work.

I loved this story. You did a great job on this as well as all

of your stories that I have read. You are incredibly talented and

deserve a very sincere pat on the back

Thank you so much!!!

Loved it! What you wrote has a soothing cadence, like the Rhythm of the Falling Rain.”

You have written every married man's fantasy. To have a beautiful, young woman give herself to him, to let him satisfy his sexual needs, feed is ego and make him feel young and desireable again. Well written and very descriptive, a guy can almost feel like it is real and you are saying those things to him. Great story.

I love when asian thots are used by white men

Perfect

Tremendous effort! Character development was out of this world! Sex was hot!

You're a quality author and should think about expanding to one of the sites where you can get renumeration for your craft. But never leave Lit, please.