All Comments on 'First Date'

up until the anal sex

This from a person taking English at university level?

The writer never said he enjoyed the class. Sound like Destiny was the one that aced the class. Give the man a break and enjoy the story. I thought it was a great story.

Some quick editing notes:

You randomly slip between past and present tense. It's annoying. Pick one and stick to it.

The past tense of do is did, not done. As in "She undid my belt" not "she undone my belt"

"Shutter" is something covering an opening. It applies to windows and camera lenses. "Shudder" is when someone shakes uncontrollably.

Pretty thin. No story or character development at all. Keep working on it.