All Comments on 'Forgiveness'

Tessa is learning the hard way that the opposite of love is not hate but apathy. Interesting story, but very sad.

I can't believe someone would waste the time writing one of the lame revenge stories that frequently get posted here, which are really about sublimated misogyny.

Quite a question really. To forgive is not the same as to accept and forget. A god story, thanks.

It is far easier to understand how someone can end up cheating than it is to forgive them for doing it.

read and liked has been very low; however, I enjoyed the pace and content of this one very much, thank you.

My best regards.

more exceleence that i have come to expect from cagetee.

well done and thank you.

Mike from Texas

i love you, i love you, i love you........

these words are used in dialogues that it loses its meaning. "i had sex w/ him/them but i love you". Uh hu, sure. it makes the dialogues so un-fucking-believable.

Call me an old softy if you wish, but I was disappointed that the story ended without forgiveness on the husband's part. Great read, nevertheless.

It is one thing to forgive someone and something else to want that relationship back. Marriage for most people is exclusive and envolves a lot of trust. Very hard to get the trust back.

Rob’s statement in the next to last paragraph was a perfect illustration of it. The last paragraph was jarringly inconsistent with it. Forgiveness is for the person who was wronged. When he forgives, the hate leaves his heart and he can move on in life and love. It is not for the person committing the wrong. In fact, they don’t ever need to know that they are forgiven. <P> Forgiveness is not the same as forgetting. It is not a blanket amnesty to cover all future hurt by the party committing the wrongs. Reconciliation may occur with a different relationship requiring more verification of actions or the parties may never meet again as the one who was hurt seeks to avoid a repetition of the hurt. <P> A good story without all the wacko revenge stuff. Both Carl and Tessa were hurt in just proportion. Thanks for writing. Phil

A well written story but I get the impression that Rob is just TOO good to forgive, TOO perfect.. I don't think forgiveness is in him.. She made a horrible decision and she is, obviously, extremely sorry about it.. If it was a real affair lasting for a period of time and not just the one time, I might agree with his decision.. It's not.. Somewhere along the line, after the months of seperation, if he really loved her to start with, he could forgive her.. To trust her would take counseling, I'm sure, but he should be able to reconcile.. Story feels incomplete.. Somewhere along the line he might realize that anyone that loves him as much as Tessa does, isn't that easy to find..

This makes a very sad story.

A well written story but I get the impression that Rob is just TOO good to forgive, TOO perfect.. I don't think forgiveness is in him.. She made a horrible decision and she is, obviously, extremely sorry about it.. If it was a real affair lasting for a period of time and not just the one time, I might agree with his decision.. It's not.. Somewhere along the line, after the months of seperation, if he really loved her to start with, he could forgive her.. To trust her would take counseling, I'm sure, but he should be able to reconcile.. Story feels incomplete.. Somewhere along the line he might realize that anyone that loves him as much as Tessa does, isn't that easy to find..

This makes a very sad story.

I read somewhere that it is easier to forgive our enemies than to forgive a friend or loved one. I guess this happens because the concept of betrayal gets thrown into the mix. So can you forgive a loved one and still remain beside them or exactly because it is a loved one you have to cast them aside because it's so painful? And how much ego is part of this equation? Lord Chesterfield said, "Wrongs are often forgiven, but contempt never is. Our pride remembers it forever."

This story was a predictable story, nothing new, nothing that gave me a jolt because it follows that Loving Wife premise that if you are unfaithful you are out. You broke a vow, and that person's code of behavior will permit no second chances, so a story like this follows either a revenge plot or at least a "casted out of the kingdom, forevermore to live in misery." But what made this story interesting was that last sentence, leaving us to think and examine what really is forgiveness. As a mother I would forgive my child anything, but as a wife, would I extend the same forgiveness to a spouse even if it was the first time they erred, even if my love for them was such part of my being that I couldn't fathom a life without them? Is it dependant on the sin?

I'm still thinking...

I can tell you from first-hand experience, it's far easier to forgive than to forget, and to have the person around you every day to remind you of what they did that broke your heart is almost too painful to consider. I can certainly appreciate Rob's position on this and his final decision to not put himself in that position again.

Excellent story. Loved Tess's stream of thinking while in the motel and afterward. Appreciated the fact that the "good guy" had options that set him up in another place so that he would not be reminded by his surroundings of what he had endured. Loved that the "bad guy" got his comeuppin's.

Thanks.

Too Many Stereotypes

<p>Though largely well written on a technical basis (grammar, spelling, syntax, et al), this story fails on several levels. The husband is too perfect, too trusting, and too oblivious for words. The other man (Carl) is too crude and too unintelligent to live. Tessa is an innocent, led astray by the serpent (and demon rum), but returns late in the story as a saint asking only for her husband's forgiveness. Apparently, the betrayed husband owes his ex-wife that forgiveness. I’m not sure why. The reason was never stated, nor even hinted at.</p>

<p>On top of that, the parties are all rich and own thriving companies, etc., etc., etc. I’m so very, very tired of this same scenario playing out in one story after another. Is there no more imagination out there?</p>

<p>Ron123XYZ@foreveranonymous.naturally</p>

One of the meanings of forgiveness is to pardon, such as pardoning a convicted felon. But as any pardoned felon knows, a pardon does not necessarily mean rehabilitation.

I think that is what applies here: he was willing to forgive her ... but not to rehabilitate her, which in her mind meant resumption of the marriage.

The forgiveness offered allows him to live with himself ... but not with her.

Well written, quite readable, and interesting.

Regards, Jack

<p>You did two things that convinced me to add this story</p>

<p>One you actually made me feel bad for the wife. I'm one for everyone standing and facing various decisions made in life, good or bad, we need to stand by them and not try to figure out how to get away with something we know will hurt someone, or find a way to get away with something we've done wrong because we don't like the concequences. And thats how the wife was at first when she was first faced with the realizition that her husband didn't cheat like she hoped he did so she wouldnt' have to face up to her willingness to cheat, as the first paragraph suggested. But having said that, you wrote the wife (now ex-wife) in such a way that I actually and truelly, felt bad for her. You managed to put in so much fear, desperation, anger, and sadness into the writing of her character that it made her seemed real. That for one thing is missing in most stories around here. That was great</p>

<p>The second thing was the last line, "What does forgiveness mean". And by a few anon comments below me you hit the nail on the head. The problem I've always had is that everyone seems to think they know what it is and if someone doesn't agree with them they are obviously wrong. Too me personally each person has to live with what they can and can't forgive. Ego has nothing to do with it. Personal preference does.</p>

<p>Sorry, Nightowl I'm going to use your comment for an example. Nightowl22 said that if it was a lasting affair that that should have warrented a divorce, but not a single encounter. But one thing I liked from the story was when Rob said this one thing <i>"you need to find someone who means so much to you that you wouldn't stray, someone who is more important to you than an exciting roll in the hay"</i> One thing I would add to the end would had been "not someone you only just realized wasn't worth the cost, after you satified your curiousity, and then decided that wasn't worth the pain you have to endure alongside myself".</p>

<p>Personally I've always felt that some folks are so <i>desensitized</i> to sex that sex between people who are married but having sex with partners outside the marriage is no big deal, long as the person feels bad about it later. But there are people who don't agree with that. And thats when divorces happen. Calling people who are senstive to this someone with an "Ego" problems isn't going to make them not care that their mate was in bed with another person. </p>

<p>Some folks can't forgive and forget. Some folks see it like anything else in life, as a choice. Just like I'm willing to bet the majority of us aren't embezzlers? Thiefs? Anyone? I'm not saying that those who are can't redeem themselves, but they dont' start by using false pretenses either? Regardless of how I felt about Rob, the wife could have talked with him first. She didn't. At that point it was up to the Author to convince me she deserved a second chance, and not just because she was sorry. And thats what alot of Anon posters are suggesting, that the main character some how thought he was better than her because he didn't forgive her.</p>

<p>Forgiveness has nothing to do with forgetting. And to each of us it means something different. And for someone who likes to watch responses, how some of the posters respond also tells me alot about each of us as well (^_^)</p>

<p>Good story</p>

-Risq

Great story. No messy dialogue nor grammatical errors, that I can remember, at least.

What's really interesting is the feedback and to see each person's interpretation of forgiveness.

Personally, I think he did forgive Tess.

It's like forgiving my friend for wrapping my car around a tree. Forgiveness doesn't change the fact my car is now being recycled for its metals.

Rob thought that Tess smashed her marriage and he did forgive her for cheating but that doesn't change the fact she "wrapped" the marriage aroung "a tree". Tess, like some readers, think the "car" is reparable, or at least driveable but Rob thought it is a write-off.

Unlike cars, however, relationships lack the physicality of determining road worthiness.

TiggerToo said just about all of it for me. He describes not a dictionary description of forgiveness but a real life meaning. A lot of counseling is still necessary for both to be whole in their approach to life from here on out. Don’t let right and wrong get confused with ego and self-pity. This could all have gone either way and still be plausible.<p>So very well done!<p>Thank you<p>PT

A well written tale that explores the raw emotions exposed by infidelity. Ah, Forgiveness - is it all that easy or simple? Everyone reacts in a different manner to betrayal; some violently with great anger, some totally devastated. Some will be able to recovere, others not. In any event, I enjoyed this story and I just wonder if a follow=up could be in the works. Good work, Cageytee.

no one who is that "committed" to his vows would be massaging the ass of another woman, in front of his wife, who, by the way, had already hinted that they swap with other couples; and whether he would enjoy seeing her fuck another man. <p>

of course, the dear author had our hero go into some brain fart for a few days, UNABLE, he said, to tell his wife that he didn't want, he couldn't have wanted another man fucking his wife. "Honey, I was too shocked and my mind didn't work for a couple days after you suggested if I wanted to see you fuck another, like Carl. My god, I love you, woman! Why would you be thinking such crude thought?" <p>

that, dear author, dear readers, is AFTER he's been massaging Sarah's ass, only a few feet away from here Tessa and Carl themselves were massaging each other's ass... <p>

INCONSISTENCY, 'tis what the author had done to Rob's character. <p>

Carl's character's consistent; he's always scheming. Sarah's character's fine; she's scheming, too, but too timid to do much, unless others take the initiative. And Tessa's character's more complex than all but still consistent, to a larger degree than all of them: she knew what she wanted --- to be fucked by another man; Carl just happened to be a small dicked idiot; if Tessa had fucked the "right" guy, who's also "romantic" in her head and who actually have a few brain cells, she'd still be fucking him; and oh, sure, still "feel all the guilt" AFTERWARD, TOOO, but guilty which never stop her since the guy would have been so fuckin' big, romantic, and all what she thinks she needed to "spice up" her marriage with... <p>

but ROB is the most lame of all characters. This guy is indecisive: he says he's hurt; but he says he's going to b okay; just give him time; he divorces the cheating wife, but couldn't stay away from her, when she finally gives up hope; he spend countless hours thinking about how he's all fine now and wants to get back with her, now that he has fucked around a bit and her betrayal no longer hurts his little head too much...<p>

but he goes back to Atlanta, from his LA place, sets up a date with her to tell her how he's now totally forgiven her; but he's so stupid, the way he says thinks CONFOUNDS both him and her, leaving her leaving their table, with him NOW SCRATCHING HIS HEAD, or, rather his dick, not sure what had just taken place, "especially after all I've planned, that I have totally forgiven her and now she leaves me, again?" <p>

this guy is a total loser; Sarah, AFTER NO MORE THAN A FEW WEEKS, realized that, so she went back home and never bothered him again, leaving him chase office girls. Tessa will, after this time, realize this guy is a total loser, too, and will never beg him for another chance again. As she said, she's torned, greedy, selfish, and all that and had made some terrible mistakes, which may or may not be forgivable, but at least she's honest enough to owe up to it and plead sincerely all her sins.... <p>

Let the guy scratch the hair of his dick, this Rob guy is a total loser, deserving no respect, love, or understanding.......

Rob's words show that he passed beyond anger and resentment as he made progress on a new life without Tessa. He wished her a happy future. That expresses the concept of forgiveness for me. However, what Rob could not forget was the betrayal of trust when Tessa broke her vows. Given his steadfast commitment to his own vows to the point of not having sex until he was officially divorced his rejection of any future with her is easily understood.**** The author has created an excellent story with clearly defined characters which has helped illuminate the question of what constitutes forgiveness.

Rob lost his sensitive and caring license in the last few paragraphs where he sets up a date to tell Tessa she is forgiven. You don't go across country to tell someone they are forgiven, you just do it! Poor Tessa is crushed again because Mr. Nice Guy can't just cut her loose.

He may have been a bit insensitive at the end but I dont think it was intended by the author (or the husband). It wasnt like he was stringing her along since he had been clear right from the beginning that he wasnt giving out second chances. If she kept getting her hopes up, thats not really his fault imo. <p><p>

Anyway, I really liked the story and the characters. I didnt dislike either the wife or the husband. Both had faults but neither came off as a bad person. Just a couple of flawed people trying to do the best they could. <p><p>

The wife wasnt so over-the-top that I just hated her and wanted to see her destroyed. The husband wasnt perfect (he was pretty ridged) but he wasnt hateful or mean about it. <p><p>

In the end, they probably had the best happy ending (for both of them) possible. The husband let go of his anger and the wife wouldnt have been happy 'proving' herself the rest of their lives if he had taken her back anyway. No matter how guilty she was feeling and how sorry for what she lost, she would have eventually started to resent the husband if he had tried to reconcile and she spent all her waking moments trying to get back something that was impossible (they may have been able to stay married but they could never have had the marriage they had before he caught her no matter how long she tried).<p><p>

Thanks much for writing. A new story from you really hit the spot. Believe it or not, I had your page open in my browser when I shut it down yesterday and was just rereading your other stories when this new one showed up. It was just like my birthday. :)

Great Story; C.T., you hit a home run w/ this one. It always surprises me when the "anon" jerks come out, & pan a really great story. It's interesting that none of them have the courage of their convictions to post their names & e-mail addresses. And oh, yes, where are all the great stories that "anon" has posted; DUH, like none. This is a great story in the sense that it doesn't do what I really dislike most; that is, stories that force a reconciliation, especially w/ a wife like Tessa, who was willing to risk the obviously best marriage she could have ever made, for a quick afternoon roll in the hay. She knew what her husband's convictions were, she knew - or certainly should have known - how he would react to the knowledge that she had screwed Carl, yet knowing all that, she did it anyway. And the fact that Rob flew all the way back to Atlanta, to tell her in person that he could finally forgive her, so that they both truly could move on, or at least begin to move on, to me speaks to the strength and goodness of his character, not the lack thereof. In the end, I could have lived with a reconciliation of Tessa and Rob, if the story had ended that way, but given how strongly Rob felt about the sanctity of the wedding vows, that could not have worked out in real like, in the end after all. Again, great story, perfect ending. Keep up the good work.

no where near as rich. You cant stay married to someone that feels sex is more important than love or vows or respect. The woman was a self satisfying egocentric bitch. A full and real slut who only stopped because she was caught. The ending was truly great, I now forgive you for ruining our relationship and marriage, I wish you a good life. Very nice! For those that ride the ANON folks dear kindred you to are ANON hiding behind false pseudonames. Your hypocritical noise is wasted, everyone who reads here has a right to their own opinions. This is one of the few stories where I think the man was a man who happened to be married to a stay at home, less than intelligent wife with a good body. And he had the ethics and morals to obey his marriage vows and expect his wife to also. After all anyone can be a cheater and an adulterer, it takes a real person to have morals and ethics. (Personally I have nothing against people who swap as long as it is safe, sane, consensual, beforehand, with both spouses involved.)

About everything worth saying has been said, I liked it a lot. Attacks on Anon's (like myself) are totally irrelavent to this fine story. Good job, thank you for your effort and sharing it with us. I will climb back under my bridge, have a good day, pass this way in peace.

The hardest part of any story to get right.<BR>

Wonderful story up to the last scene in the restaurant.<BR>

A powerfully written story petered out to a fizzle of nothing.<BR>

All the same elements could have been there - his forgiveness, her despair, but presented in a much better way.<BR>

As it stands I felt cheated at the end.<BR>

You justifed the lack of a reconciliation quite well in the body of the story, that is not the problem. <BR>

There was so much possible emotion there left out, leaving this reader completely unsatisfied with the way you wrote the ending.

This story provides the perfect description of what it means to forgive someone. You let go of your feelings for revenge, hate or even justice in response to the other person's action against you. You do want them to move on with their life.________________________________________

Unfortunately, many of these stories portrary the innocent spouse as insensitive, mean spirited or just crazy not to take back the cheating spouse who made "a stupid mistake." and said that they were sorry and wanted to make it up to them. Taking the spouse back is not just forgiveness it is absolving them of that wrong. Of course, many wronged spouses take back their spouse for various reasons many of which do not have anything to do with love._______________

Rob kept his wedding vows as an expression of his love for

Tessa. She allowed her curiosity to convince herself that Rob would want the same thing but she did two things make her seemed deceitful. First, she never told him about her "date" with Carl. If Rob really wanted to watch her with another man then why didn't she arrange that scene? What was the hurry to meet Carl secretly at a hotel? Second she seemed dissatisfied with her sex life with Rob. Why didn't she talk to him about alternatives before she played up to another man? Lastly, (I know that is 3) she had an opportunity to confess her mistake but she rather keep him in the dark,_____________________________________________

Even if you forgive someone that does mean that you are willing to live a life of doubts, settling for less or pretending that the betrayal never happened. Tessa thought forgiveness means wiping the slate clean as do those reconciliation-at-all-cost writers/commenters.___________ You ended the story with a question but you answered what it means to forgive by Rob's actions. Thanks for an outstanding story!________________________________________

SleeplessinMD

Thanks for your story. I believe that you captured the true meaning of forgiveness. Since the husband was able to forgive his wife, he was able to begin to let go of the pain and suffering of her betrayal. If you want to follow up on this story, you might consider exploring the possibility of reconciliation.

Boyd

Very impressive Author! For what it's worth in my viewpoint, nearly a perfect story of marital consequence.<P>

First to respond to the critics interested in reconciliation. I don't think most of you realise the risk a marriage is. You have about as much care and concern as most do in the perfect world of blinding love and or lust. The white heat of those times seems so perfect that risk isn't a word to be used.<P>

It just isn't in the new spouses vocabulary given all the excitement of the moments. Kind of like each couples financial plan to a successful life. Both are expected but not fully understood going in.<P>

Some wedding plans might be altered if the risks were fully analysed by one or both. You cannot change people. We are what we do. If you ignore negatives that you know about your pending spouse or don't know enough for reasonably complete comfort in your future together, but plow ahead anyway - some would say you got what you deserved. Not everything is unforeseen is it? Which is why the time together over a prolonged period can expose more than a short one.<P>

Those of you who like me who have had a hot long distance relationship usually find out that living together over relatively long period brings out many unknowns that can dampen the fire of the previous weekends [once or twice a month] of wild monkey heat.<P>

Those who would not risk $100.00 will often take a much greater risk with their future with less information than with a bookie.<P>

My point is this. Given all the risk and commitment a marriage causes, should there be an infidelity even of short duration or a single event, normal people are greatly offended. Many have the right to never recover or place their future again in the hands of some they once trusted with their life as well as their family's future.<P.

That basic human right is a persons choice - certainly not one exterior to the circumstance and pain. So while you feel right or wrong about what happened and resulted it isn't yours to fault or favor.<P>

Now after defending you Author I would pick a bone about your ending. I know what you were trying to do but it did more harm to his credibility than you contemplated. You attempted to prolong the mystery of his final choice but it just turned out to be a mean spirited effort to maim her after you were so fair and direct in his prior openness. That miscalculation turned a potentially perfect effort into a less than one in my and some other eyes. It was a great story demonstrating your talents and lifelike feelings otherwise and to the end.<P>

Now toesboy as to your comment about anons and their rights. A silly name like yours doesn't warrant much respect about your words although you still have the right to voice them here regardless of their bias. So give it up on the ills of not having a silly name as you do.<P>

Sorry Author but it irks me more on some occasions than on others.<P>

I anxiously await your work and rightly so. It echo's life and reality in large part and you swing a scale fairly in my eyes in that you set the stage for your actions in a human way. So you are appreciated for this and your other works and I hope for for more at closer interval if possible.<P>

With Very High Regard

Great suspense & build up, I was so afraid he was gonna wimp out, you kept me on the edge of my seat right up until a perfect ending. Rob was to stupid to fuck Sarah out of revenge, and I feared he would not be strong enough to stand up to her badgering to get back together, and be able to get on with his life. It's so much easier to forgive when you don't have the slut in your face every day.

Once the point of Forgiveness is reached that hurt person has several options. There is no set answer.

<br></br>

In this case Rob was NOT willing to Risk another event. If Tessa had come clean FIRST then he might of reacted differently.

<br></br>

Yeah this is a GOOD story but for me NOT a great one. ... though I can se how for some this might be a great story. Both Sarah and Tessa seem to think ONLY with their pussies.

<br></br>

Here are some question for Y'all to ponder on the issue of Forgiveness vs Reconciliation.

1 Tessa is in Big trouble right from the get go. She is HOPING that her loving husband is fucking Sarah as she is fucking Carl.

<br></br>

You dont have to be Dr phil to know that having this mindset b/c of some lose pillow talk while screwing the night before is a sign your marriage is in BIG BIG trouble.

<br></br>

<br></br>

2 Given HOW Tessa was described in the 1st page and her sexual yearnings (her 7 year itch or whatever you wnat to call it) ... would Tessa continue the affair IF she had NOT be caught ?

<br></br>

<br></br>

3 assume for a second Ron reconciles with Tessa. Does Tessa strike YOU as the type of person that is willing put up with making this extra effort happiuly for years?

This story is notable in its pacing, which is excellent. However, the plot, even the characterizations are lacking. At the end of the story I felt I had just eaten an Angelfood cake, something with mass but very light.<p>

I could not invest in any of these characters, and yet, I cannot tell you exactly why, except that your excellent pacing was done at the expense of depth in the story itself. In the end I did not care about either Rob or Tessa, they were just another divorce statistic.

cageytee is one of my favorite authors which is why oopsies like this one really grate: <I>He had recently bought a second small business to <B>compliment</B> and support the one he already had...</I> The misuse of <I>compliment</I> here and a few other grammatical faux pas are painful because the author's prose is so good otherwise.

<P>

I read the story a second time before commenting, to see if my initial impressions held. Mostly, they did. The characters are reasonably well done and they're believable. The storyline is well-handled but the author creates a large plot hole when Rob gets even with Carl. No company worth spit would open itself up to a multi-million dollar conflict of interest lawsuit. Rob's failure to recuse himself from the land deal in which Carl was a potential seller constitutes greedy self-interest. I can't believe that his superiors at Deston would allow him to negotiate for the company, particularly since he was new and untested at his job. It's a bad blunder in plotting out the story, and it hurts the storytelling.

<P>

The story's pacing is pretty good and the author kept my interest as the story played out. To my way of thinking the story ended appropriately. Rob demonstrated that he was happier on his own, and Tessa had grown tired of waiting for forgiveness that wasn't forthcoming. It was a nice gesture on Rob's part to fly to his old home to tell Tessa that he forgave her but the time for forgiveness had already passed. These two people are better parted as there's no particular reason for them to reconcile. There's no love here any longer so it would be foolish to force the issue. They should just get on with their lives.

<P>

Pretty good storytelling, cageytee. Thank you.

I have to confess; you totally took me by surprise with your ending. I am not talking about the much discussed final scene. I am referring to Rob’s final decision, to which he arrives after a lot of deliberation, which is to stick to his original conclusion and not to get back together with Tessa. Seems to me like I have been conditioned by too many RAAC stories, to the point that I could not believe that sometimes “NO” (at the beginning of the story) could simply mean: “NO” (at the end of the story). Like Risq, I have always scratched my head about the categorical syllogism which became the common wisdom at least in this section, with only few exceptions. You could describe it in the form of Premise I: All forgiving includes reconciliation with one’s spouse. <P>

Premise II: X character has forgiven his/her spouse. <P>

Conclusion: X character has reconciled with his her spouse. <P>

Should the parents who find a place in their hearts (not too common) to forgive the murderer of their son/daughter, be expected to then also reconcile with that person, become that person’s nurturers and personal friends? I know this also happens, but I believe, there would be no disagreement that the latter cases are rare exceptions, by all means not a “norm”. <P>

If you want to say that murder is different case, I could argue it in two ways. One: I could argue with the premise. I could say that at times, the horror stories of some marriages and the path of destruction they leave would make you think that the difference is more of a technicality. Two: I could accept your premise, but say even if it is different; who says that only in the case of the pain suffered by the loss of a child, forgiving does not include automatic reconciliation? <P>

What about other kinds of pain? And how do you get to decide which pain qualifies as a ’waiver’ over the ‘mandate’ to reconcile with the person who hurt/offended you, and you still have that wish to “just” forgive that person?

After this story I am coming out somewhat hopeful that from now on this false syllogism will not be taken as a law of nature. <P>

It is interesting though, that practical as Rob may be, he never makes too big of a deal over the fact that Tessa lied to him twice. Now, if I were him, I would have made much bigger deal out of the lying, but that’s me. To be exact, I would have been bothered much less by her first lies (her efforts to cover her one time liaison with Carl). BTW, Harry, as for one of your hypothetical questions to the readers, I think that the story makes it quite clear that Tessa’s experience with Carl ended, even at the hotel, pretty badly. But certainly, in light of the fact that the Rob did not do any swapping, she would have not gone into any affair with Carl. In her internal monologue she confesses being both ashamed and fearful of being exposed. <P>

While her initial effort to cover up her cheating was not the best idea (at least for a practical reason: lying makes you vulnerable to be exposed, if not on the basis of morals), I can see how in her mind she could have thought that a one time error of judgment; giving in to temptation should be buried deep in the past, never to be mentioned or repeated –lesson learned, no harm done. What I can not understand is how Tessa could still be lying to Rob AFTER she was caught lying. You would think that she would learn something from her initial experience. When Tessa describes the circumstances of her liaison with Carl, supposedly coming clean and acknowledging all that she did wrong and how she was planning to prove herself etc. she still can not trust herself and Rob to sustain the whole truth. If indeed she believed, as she brazenly lies to Rob (from her internal monologue we already know that she was not sure about that, and later it became clear to her that it would not happen due to Sarah’s attitude), that Rob and Sara were ‘doing it’, why did she hide what she and Carl did? Why didn’t she ask right away how was his sexual liaison with Sarah? The propensity to lie (and stupidly so – Rob could have asked her the same questions) is to me a much stronger indicator of a weak personality, namely weak ego strength, and reliance on primitive defenses. All Bad indicators for a future partner. After all, this time around she was lying – or “embellishing” the truth AFTER the cheating AND after she was caught! <P>

As for Rob, I was left worried about the future of his romantic life. That is, if he continues to insist on: ‘no error of judgment/no moment of weakness as a criterion for his future partner, I am afraid that, like in the fairy tales, over time, each and every candidate would be found unfit to his “shoe of glass”. If honesty; openness; readiness to accept mistakes and learn from them on both sides, are not on his list of required qualifications, just ‘never make mistakes or have any weakness’ (I am not talking about “never cheat” only, as many divorces are not about cheating), he is in for a long time of bachelorhood… <P>

Great story; suspenseful and thought provoking. BTW, have you noticed how infrequently you write? Just kidding, but please start on the next one…

forgiveness. You wrote___________________________________

"You may not even be interested. It may not mean anything to you any more, but it does to me. Tessa . . . if it makes any difference to you at all, I want you to know that I have forgiven you. Whatever hurt you caused, I'm over it and I want you to know that I sincerely wish you every happiness. I hope you have a great life."______________

His manner was soft and gentle, as he so often was, but his words drove a dagger into her heart, as she recognized she was never going to get him back. She said, "This is it isn't it Rob? You're never going to give me another chance are you?"__________________________________________

His look confirmed her worst fears and with tears streaming down her cheeks she said, "You haven't really forgiven me at all Rob. If you had, you would let me back into your life and let me spend our time together making you happy and making you forget how much I hurt you."____________

Now after the discovery of Tessa's betrayal Rob could not be in the same room as her and he wanted to hurt her. without this conversation Tessa would have been waiting for years for Rob to come back. Now she can truly move on. ____________________________________________________

If your best friend pursues and seduces your one true love even when he or she know your feelings you may forgive that person but does the relationship stay the same? If your supervisor take all of the credit for your work on a critical job but later you are promoted and you forgive that person do you promote that person to a right hand position of trust? _____________________________________

Tessa planned and encouraged her liaison with Carl. She viewed her sex life with Rob as dull. She allowed Carl to have liberties with her body that Rob would not have approved and she knew that which is why she needed Rob to fool around with Sarah. So if they went to counseling how would Rob be part of the problem? He was not rough with her? How was he supposed to divine that information?____

Anyway, it is a shame that so many believe that forgiveness means giving the person a second chance. If there is still love and a relationship healthy enough to make it worth the effort a second chance may happen but there are no sure things in this life.__________________________________

Thanks again for a powerful story!_______________________

SleeplessinMD

What done is already Done....roy153@gmail.com

Your story was cool yet very HOT.

One of the most common meanings of to forgive is to stop being angry about or resenting somebody or somebody's behavior.

<br><br>

That is certainly applicable and actually quite precise in this story. Forgiveness on it's own is hardly reconciliation.

<br><br>

But then, what does it mean to reconcile:

<br><br>

- to bring about a friendly relationship between disputing people or groups (often passive)<br>

- to solve a dispute or end a quarrel<br>

- to make somebody accept that something undesirable cannot be changed<br>

- to make two or more apparently conflicting things consistent or compatible, or to become consistent or compatible<br>

- to return to a friendly relationship after a dispute or estrangement<br>

<br>

Hmmm! All of these seem to be appropriate to one degree or another. It seems what she really wants is a do-over, one that would lead them to:<br>

<br>

Reunite! To bring people together, or come together, after a separation.

<br>

So, it is clear that you can forgive and reconcile until the cows come home - and maybe this is a step on the path to reuniting - but it does not automatically follow that it leads there.<br>

<br>

The story was nicely done - great read!

<br>

Regards, Jack

Rob never forgave Tessa until he hurt her as bad as she hurt him...he wasn't able to forgive until he divorced her and found someone else...Ladies and gentlemen, that is not forgiveness that is a payment. Forgiveness means that it as though the act (in this case adultery)had never occured. Love is not an act of kindness when things go your way, it is a choice we make in spite of the things that go wrong. Rob choose to not forgive and punish Tessa with divorce, he also choose to no longer be in love with her. He was punishing her and then he "forgives" her at the end? Bullshit!

Futhermore, she matured, she realized her mistake and was willing to abase herself to earn his trust, Rob didn't. He was only willing to love Tessa when she was his.He only saw the act of betrayal not the shame or the hurt. As for Sarah, the question needs to be asked, where does infidelity begin? In the act or in the intent...because Sarah wanted to fuck and fantasized about fucking Rob...not a good thing in any marriage.

So this story was ok, but Rob was a liar-because he choose to fall out of love with Tessa while proclaiming how much he loved her- and a angry, vengeful husband, Tessa was an adulteress because she cheated on Rob with Carl because she thought sex with Rob was boring and misinterpeted events and Sarah cheated on Carl with Rob in her fantasies and neglected her husband...and of course Carl was in it only for himself. Frankly, Carl is the only honest one in the bunch.

Carl was the only honest one? Give me a break. That is so stupid! A lying cheating coward could never be honest. Rob was the only honest one. Tessa destroyed the love he had by being a cheating lying wife that no one deserves to have. This story was as good as it gets here on lit. Thank you for writing, Luis

Very cool story. I almost felt sorry for Tess in the end, but the ending was correct.

good story .. what is forgiveness but revenge given softly

Entertaining and enjoyable - geez, even the fucked up professional commentator, Alvaron53 lowered his expectations and gave the story a 75. "Hell must have frozen over" - and they said mircales do not occur anymore. In any case, thank you for your efforts - author!

What a great story. "I forgive you" what a tremendous gift. Of course Tessa didn't feel that way. I loved it, he wasn't dangling a hope of getting the marriage back together. Instead he was trying to get to the point where he could honestly say that it was all behind him. Tessa continued to want the marriage to return, but Hubby had had enough. Sure was a quick way for a 'swap' to have ocurred, that part bothered me. Still, I don't see hubby waiting forever before finding someone else. Five, six years down the road I imagine that Rob will find someone else. Gentle, loving people usually do. Wimps and cowards don't! Thanks for sharing!

Awesome story....just awesome.....ignore the dikheads who find reasons to criticize it. Reconcilliation depends on the facts and circumstances of each case. It's not neccessary that the hurting spouse forgives the guilty spouse in each and every story. Rob had certain principles and standarads. She absolutely failed and betrayed him. So she faced the consequences. Perfect. Its high time we found some sotries where the guilty spouse feels the pain instead of being forgiven and getting away with the whole thing.

Superb!

together nor did you do the silly act of putting the other guys wife in as his. Forgiveness in this case means I am over knowing you were so stupid you did something that totally betrayed and humiliated our marriage, me, and you, and that both of us can go on with our lives without staying in touch with each other. Instead of the guilty party assuming the innocent party has to forgive them, why dont they simply step out of the other persons life and let them live again without constant remindeers of what they did and how littel they really loved you?

Well written, characters are consistent. A tale of the nonsense of "forgive and forget." We are not in control of what we forget that is why foregiveness is divine. Separation from the cause of our injury allows our foregiveness to be continual rather than continuous; for many, separation makes foregiveness possible. Foregiving frees the offended from their own destructuve emotions; all of us would love to forget, if it were only possible. Some confuse repressing memories with forgetting; repression is destructive and interrupts the process of forgiveness, leaving the offended in a limbo of their own.

I LOVE A Happy Ending!

The author made both main characters look like idiots and in doing so made the story a piece of crap,two people who hold big jobs can't be that dumb so i got to think the author an idiot.

When you forgiveness is defined we often include forgetfulness with it. That doesn't fly with real forgiveness.

Forgiveness means that I am willing to, and have decided to, give up my right to hurt you in response to the hurt you have given me. I am not promising to forget, that would require a type of amnesia that borders on devine, and no person currently alive on this world is devine--let alone me.

Another of your "let's get revenge on the lousy slut wife" series. Each has promise in the story line but the author's embitterment, anger and self righteousness overwhelm all other emotions in his stories. Too bad.

Thanks for the story. For me it raised more questions than it answered. Perhaps that is because, in this aspect of life, the answers are not very clear. Your story provoked many memories, feelings long burried and decisions, some kept and others forgotten. The story was more provocative than insightful, but it was insightful nevertheless.

PS Perhaps in time Teesa (did I spell her name correctly?) will come to understand herself more deeply. If she does, who knows? Maybe they will one day meet again.

and bastard story. And really one of the meanest endings ever. She certainly earned not living with him ever again. But that final "I forgive you!" after letting her stew in her love and failure for months and making sure she knew about Sarah, was a true destructive act. She knew he was really never coming back, but he took one last shot at her and made her think for a moment that he might ACTUALLY forgive her mistake and they could be together. This is emotional violence, even rape. She did not rape him, but what she did does not deserve this kind of treatment. He did this act either consiously or unconsciously to hurt her and make himself feel good one more time. In fact, in some ways, at that moment, what he does is worse than what she did. He should have gotten off his high and mighty horse the last time he saw her and just never returned so that they could both move on. Not very likable characters: good writing of course,s but not enjoyable in the end.

oh? and then what happened? there are wri- er people like you all through lit.com. you asshole,s just cannot finish a story. i'll bet when you jack off you quiet halfway through. you forget how to finish tha too. uh?

The comments are by far...greater than this stereotypical story. I personally agree with Nightowl22. He is made out to be the "Mr. Perfect Man" when in fact, Tessa and Sarah are the "real" and loving persons in this story. I was turned off by his "Holier than Thou" attitude... However, you definitely pleased the "Holier than thou" unforgiving crowd. She made a "Wrong" assumption in thinking her husband was into a swap as well with Sarah, but she did not go out to deliberately cheat or disrespect her husband with aforethought which I think is needed to be out and out cheating. How many times have I read on here that if one has the spouse's persmission...it ain't cheating? So she was wrong in her assumption! Don't we all assume wrongly at times? Like almost everyday? Just a layman reader's view...

Rob is!

My disappointment with the ending completely obscures what I think about the writing. How small/shallow a man is who can't overcome his pride to allow a repentant wife to make amends for her error. I see too much of that here.

Rich

Wonderful selfcontrol! What a fine example of strength in personality. He didn't phisically hurt or kill anybody. A wonderful mind to gain revenge financially and bring her lover down. She neverf really loved her husband anyway, he was just a form of security.

Rob is a highly principled person. He is even willing to do business with Carl even though he despises him. Also note that he doesn't take revenge on Carl. The decision not to buy from Carl was made by by the business circumstances and strongly influenced by others in the company. Yes, he took some pleasure in the knowledge that Carl was about to get screwed but Rob didn't pass on the sale to get even. And beyond the divorce, Rob takes no action against Tessa. He even stays faithful until his divorce is final. Given all this, Rob is very principled. Further, some comments have painted him as "Holier than thou" but where has he preached to anyone or claimed moral superiority? Once Rob gets past the initial shock he simply says he cannot live with someone that has betrayed him in this way. Aren't we all entitled to decide what matters to us personally and to structure our life in accordance with those values? He is justified in having no trust in Tessa. She got an itch and decided to scratch it without consideration of the consequences. Before she hooked up with Carl she could have talked with Rob about swapping partners. She didn't because she didn't want to be stopped. She instinctively KNEW Rob wouldn't want to swap and plunged ahead before he could put a stop to it. Tessa's judgment and priorities are all screwed up and nothing she has done has shown that they would improve in the future. We know she is sorry. OK, Rob eventually forgave her because she was sorry. But how can he know that it won't happen again? Has she just received an infusion of good judgment? A transplant of priorities that makes her husband more important than her own selfish desires? I didn't see anything like that. In the area of marriage fidelity, Rob has set a very high standard. He is entitled to do that and holds himself to the same standard. I don't see how that makes him a jerk. The ending shows how little Tessa and Rob understand each other. Rob believes he is giving something valuable to Tessa, his forgiveness. To a principled man that is an very important thing. But it isn't what Tessa wants and she places no value on it. Rob stated that his values and Tessa's aren't the same and he is correct. The ending proves it and reinforces why he doesn't want to be with her. If Tessa truly understood and valued Rob she would have appreciated what he had given her (forgiveness) even though it wasn't everything she wanted. As an additional note, Sarah seems too ditzy and morally fuzzy to be a good match for Rob. She was all set to cheat on her husband (Carl), just as Tessa did. Both women were somewhat dissatisfied with their marriages and planned to cheat as a way to improve their situation. With Sarah, I'm not sure he is trading up.

Yet another self-righteous male rides off into the sunset clutching his wounded heart looking a virginal replacement because his wife is no longer perfect (and therefore worthy of him) but is now so disappointingly human. Interesting that our pure-as-the-driven-snow hero has to run away and hide, deliberately leave his wife in emotional limbo, divorce her, and fuck around before finally "forgiving" her (Please accept the magnificent gift of my no longer hating you, and oh, by the way, now that you've been agonizing for 9 months, maybe now you should know that I'm never coming back). All without the courage or the mere courtesy of having one adult conversation with her.

I'm not condoning at all Tessa's actions nor do I object to the ultimate outcome of Rob and Tessa not getting back together. These are not interesting to debate. I do take issue with Rob being portrayed as simply the wronged hero instead of a self-absorbed emotional coward. The measure of a man should be taken from the depth of his compassion rather than the height of his wounded pride.

Yet another cheating slut/whore that thinks it is okay to spread her legs for any random shitbird and get a free pass but if the situation were reversed he would be castrated and left destitute. Interesting how the wife can mouth the words in her wedding vows but not mean them; a sad commentary on the way some people in our society view the verbal contract as nothing more than empty words. If being human is stabbing your partner in the back with lies, deceit, adultery and betrayal and expecting to do so without consequences then humanity has reached an all time low. The quality of being human, what separates us from animals, is honor, trust, fidelity and the ability of the rational mind in the well developed frontal lobe to overcome the base animal instincts to copulate with whomever whenever the urge takes us.

Tessa did not make a mistake, she simply cheated on Rob. She said that they had "practically swapped already". Her proof is this is that she made one comment to him, a comment that she can't even remember his response to, and that permitted her to sleep with Carl.

She had an affair with another man. Period. It doesn't make her a bad person, but the reasoning she had does not, in any way, excuse her actions.

I don't really agree with the way Rob handled it, but he was portrayed as a man who stuck to his principles and that's what he did. He found forgiveness for her, but could not accept her choices and has decided to move on. Nice job, Cageytee.

Rob was suddenly a bit to conservative. At the party he had some fun with Sarah and everybody (except Rob) thought they were going to swap since Sarah wanted to have him as well. Tessa made a bad decision to have sex with Carl before she was certain they all would swing together. She just thought they would.

Now comes to mind, what I'm wondering about in these kind of stories in general. Were they all virgins when they met their spouses and never ever had sex with someone else? Is the life of those people only revolving around sex? How about fitting together in general? Aren't they best friends or soulmates and enjoys being with his or her spouse?

If someone is conservative and only had one sexual partner I can agree that there is no need to reconcile but else? When a couple lives together and has a wonderful life and they both just click and both did have sex with other persons before they met anyway, why do so many people have troubles to overcome a one time mistake like Tessas? Life is much more then sex!

Don't like the ending, but thought the writing was very good.

To forgive is not the same thing as reconciliation. At least the kind of reconciliation Tessa envisioned. Maybe they can now be friends.

Cageytree, Thanks for the story. Not every story has an happy ending, just like real life.

Rob is a stiff stick, in one crucial way a worse asshole than even Carl. He's a despot, a despoiler of deeply felt love who doesn't believe people are complicated and can let fantasy get the best of them ...once. That we all make mistakes. All (except maybe the "Anonymous" readers who haunt these pages and have never lied, cheated, deceived, or even as kids stolen penny candy, being themselves saintly)! He doesn't believe in sin (or human failure, if you will), or redemption, much less forgiveness. After months of revenge fucking disguised as sweet charity, he at last condescends to forgive her? Sheeeit! What he deserves is for Tessa to blow her brains out all over him, her life now being effectively over anyhow. Then at last he can feel some remorse and to make amends, blow his own brains out. A lifetime of sorrow or remorse for being so unforgiving is too good for him.

A cunt that spreads her legs and pisses on her wedding vows cannot feel 'deep love.' There are a few people who think adultery, lying, cheating and humiliating a spouse is 'love' or think it is akin to leaving the toilet seat up or putting a ding in the fender of the car. Everyone else understands that pissing on a marriage and a spouse is a demonstration of an utter lack of respect and a selfish disdain for the feelings of the spouse.

Deep love, like the walls of her well fuck pussy now belong to Carl and I don't see how stealing candy, and lying as a kid are the same as getting fuck by another man. They got married, he to coin a phrase, was not leasing that cow, he bought it. Lock stock and barrel. So his investment is tanted. And to compare the two are the same as comparing almost dead to dead and burried.

so half way through page 1, I stopped reading and rated it 1*.

VickieTern in life u cant get everything u want. every bad thing have there "bad result". we should accept it.

VickieTern IF ROB IS THE ONE WHO HAVE CHEAT I KNOW U WOULD SAY THAT TESSA SHOULD HURT HIM BADLY AND TREAT HIM WORST. GROW UPPPPPPPPPPPP . THINK ABOUT BOTH SIDE AND SAY

good story - would be ruined with a followup RAAC

GREAT story with a JPB ending, meaning, of course, no ending at all. Has to be the least deserved 4 star rating that I've ever given to a story.

Seriously, Dwornock? You say the story "went on and on" but you only got through half the first page before you stopped reading and gave it 1*? What the hell? Do you have the attention span of a gold fish? I know you have the brains of one, but jeez....

As for the story, I disagree with lonewolf's opinion that its a JPB story. JPB's stories have endings; either the husband is a wimp and accepts a slut wife, or he mans up and leaves the slut wife. This story, however, had "soft" ending. Sure, Rob divorces Tessa, she pines away, and in the end finally loses all hope of a reconciliation. But now both Rob and Tessa and Sarah are alone, no one is truly happy. Tessa lost Rob. Sarah couldn't maintain a relationship with Rob. Rob lost his wife, gave up Sarah, and ended up dating women in nightclubs in LA....okay, maybe Rob is actually happy about that...he;s definitely have fun!

Rob wasn't going to be a cuckold. His immediate reaction to the adulterous affair shows that. His actions in ruining Carl financially were of a higher level style of vengance. The after effects of a beating will fade away, but driving him into the dirt like that, and introducing him to "Bubba", well, that's actually better than a bullet in the back of the head, IMO. It gives Carl years to really appreciate just how thouroughly he has been fucked over.

So Tessa wants him to forgive her? Please....Seems like she seriously misjudged her husband, didn't she? So, as the tale ends, two folks have seriously fucked themselves over, and Rob has just removed a disloyal parasite.

and the dullest one in the shed - what an asshat. Story did a nice job of distinguishing forgive and forget. I might forgive someone for shooting me in the face with a shotgun but I will never walk in front of Cheney while out hunting ever again.

and the dullest one in the shed - what an asshat. Story did a nice job of distinguishing forgive and forget. I might forgive someone for shooting me in the face with a shotgun but I will never walk in front of Cheney while out hunting ever again.

He's no longer mad and has moved on, he holds no ill will towards her. Where as her version is, him getting over everything and taking her back. But he truly is giving her more than she diserves.

one of the few stories where i wanted to see them back again. well written.

You can only forgive those that apologize and are truly remorseful. You can give your forgiveness, but it cannot be taken up by a person who is not really remorseful for the injury they caused. In the case of a person who cheats on a spouse, true remorse is unlikely. You see, cheating is like premeditated murder. It is committed by those people who take the time to plan and execute their crimes with the knowledge of the damage they are doing. While it may seem like a crime of passion - it is not. Cheating is a lie, a cover up. It is all about the power realized through deceiving the person closest to you in your life. It is the feeling that you are above everyone else, smarter than everyone else, the "rules" do not apply to you - it is the sin of pride. Such a person cannot be forgiven because the chose to commit their crime with the full knowledge of the pain it would cause. They felt no remorse in their actions and only when caught feign remorse to try to gain an advantage in the situation. Do not forgive a cheater. They cannot be trusted. Cast them aside. Chose better next time.

Definition

1. To excuse for a fault or an offense; pardon.

2. To renounce anger or resentment against.

To forgive is to grant pardon without harboring resentment. That is not what the husband did. He needs to look at his own actions to realise that those played a part in the actions of his wife. Having his hands on her bare back. Groping and kissing. And not clearly saying no when she said would you like me to fuck Carl!!! For goodness sake no matter how drunk I was I would let my wife know that would be unacceptable. Marriage needs to be worked on constantly. Communication, communication, communication.

I've been married for 25+ years and had some issues early on, after 3 years together. It's easy to walk away. Man up talk the issue through, it's obvious Rob never "listened" to his wife. He prejudged the mistake and the outcome. These stories always mention the vows and cling to forsake all others. But what about for better or worse. It's in the same sentence and carries as much weight.

This deserves a sequel to enable Rob to get his head out of his arse. And make Tessa a stronger character now she had the epiphany.

The philosophy of Rob seems to be under scrutiny as far as his view of forgiveness. Tess made a horrible misguided decision without collaboration or consent of her spouse to break the boundaries of their relationship and their marriage. It is without a doubt the core issue of this story. It is not the sex outside the marriage but the lack of trust and communication, which Tess took it on her own authority without consultation. Perhaps, they may have gone down that road to swap or other things but it wasn't discussed as a viable option in the marriage. The consequences endured by Tess were in large measure harsh and rigid. She may have fairest better had she discussed this with her spouse beforehand rather than finding out from Carl in his wreckless abandon outburst at his unannounced visit with Tess. Tess should've confronted Carl at the hotel notifying him that she no longer wanted this to happen. Carl was a buffoon to add to her betrayal. Tess couldn't put the Genie back into the bottle. Rob could've been more compassionate to Tess but he chose not to go there. The story was well written but I found it repulsive.

Is it just me or are all the characters n this sordid tale just a wee bit spineless?

The ending reminds me of half baked soap where the writer leaves everyone with a "huh?!?".

to forgive is to grant pardon without harboring resentment. it implies forgetting the transgression. i could parse the definition if you like, but ultimately the forgiving party behaves as if the offender never transgressed in the first place.

Perhaps it would have ended better if he had hated her. I cant understand how a man who knew how to show his wife he loved her could be so cruel and hurt her so badly. He was obviously only in love with his male ego and pride. If he genuinely loved her as much as he tried to demonstrate by all his loving actions, he would have given her the second chance she so desperately wanted.

@user10 you are wrong - forgive and forget are not synonymous. He lifted the burden of guilt and shame from her for her actions but did not erase the memory

It turns out the cost of forgiveness is not cheap. For her it is insurmountable. He forgives, but he does not forget.

Damn

Great story. I would have liked it better if he had ended up getting back with her, but it was still a good story. I liked the way that the author made her human and not some narcissistic sex robot with no feelings. Her mistake was simply that....a mistake. She wanted to test the waters but had no intention of having an affair. She felt that her husband was going to do the same thing so she saw an opportunity to go for it. Her only real bad decision was that she ASSUMED. I think that her assumption was more based on the "easier to ask for forgiveness than permission" line of thought. If she really wanted to do an even swap that was good for the BOTH of them, she would have talked to him first and they would have communicated their fears and excitements. From communicating with Swingerjoe, I understand that people who do swapping and open marriages have extensive communication before doing so. That is the only way to keep your marriage in tact. To just do it in anticipation that the other person has or will do it is selfish. That is why he left her.

I do like the exploration into forgiveness. Forgiveness does not mean that we can go back to the way it was before. Forgiveness is just a way of letting go of the hurtful thing that exists between two people. "Forgive and forget" does not mean reconciliation. It can end that way, but that is not always the case. It simply means that whatever wrong that was done is in the past and will never be revisited again. It doesn't mean we go back. By the time the person is forgiven and the event is moved past, you may be two different people with two different paths in life. Once you get to the "forget" portion of forgiveness, you realize that the event that hurt you so badly doesn't even enter your mind anymore. It will be a distant memory, like your mom spanking you when you were younger.

She only wanted to be forgiven for her own sake, to try to get her husband back. She didn't care about forgiveness for his sake. She was not worried about his suffering only her own. That is the problem with the relationship and why it was doomed. She is a very selfish person. Not too smart either. These traits had combined to make her a poor choice for a wife and a terrible choice for the future mother of your children. Rob had a problem bigger than a one time fling: she was unfit to be a spouse. Rob realized that and acted wisely. Anger and pain are indicators that you have a problem that you must solve. Once Rob solved the problem the symptoms started to fade. Forgiving her put the whole thing to rest. Forgiveness is great for releasing pain and anger, but it doesn't change the equation.

A quality tale. Five stars.

This is the kind of story that leaves us with a bitter flavour in the mouth...But it's a good story...

Really? Those commenters that said that need to learn to read. The story was very well written, very well told, but the idea that he should forgive the wife is laughable. She cheated on him. She didn't listen to him when she suggested fucking the other guy. She just went with the fact that she wanted to. Then when caught, same old shit. Only sex, bad sex. Didn't mean anything to her, didn't love Karl, only Rob. Bound to be a way the earn his trust, etc, etc. Then cost him a fortune and a ton of pain by slowing down the divorce, even though he was trying to be fair. Not a sign of love, not reaching out for trust. More selfishness, more manipulation, more bullshit.

That said, was very well written. Brought the reader right into the story. We could almost feel Rob's pain and anger. Could almost feel the lack of respect for him and her marriage vows, her selfishness. Well done.

Well written story but Rob is a wimp. Too weak to look at whether she was a slut and would cheat again, or she made a mistake (okay, acted like a slut) but was worth a second chance. The last meeting to say he forgave her was over-the-top.

This one has me conflicted. The wife is a bit stupid and very selfish. She never really apologizes. But the husband just gives up. It seems like he really didn't love her all that much. He treats their marriage more like a business contract. I never did feel much sympathy for him. And what was with all the filler with Sarah?

Even so, I do like your stories very much. This one just feels unfinished and jumbled.

This was a well-written, focused and intelligent exploration of the topic, ending the only way it could. Two people whose fundamental values conflict so much could not go on as a real partnership.

. . but not a very likable one. Tessa suffered from a very common type of boredom and sadly made a very bad mistake, which she amplified (at least to Rob) by saying

it meant nothing. Carl was little more than a cartoon stereotype, but that fit the story well enough.

Rob was a principled guy but wasn't quite human enough. He was one of those people who does everything right, but you just don't like him anyway.

There are a number of definitions and synonyms for "Forgiveness". Some, like

"Pardon" and "clemency" may have legal implications, or aspects, involving excusing a wrong, or mercy or absolution for the wrongdoer. A commonplace definition is -- to stop being angry at someone for the wrong they've done you.

The last one seems the shallowest to me. It has a "well, enough time has gone by that I'm not really pissed anymore" feeling to it. That's what Rob gave to Tessa, and in a way it was cruel of him to say it; because he knew that the only forgiveness that meant anything to her was for him to give her another chance.

he couldn't, not wouldn't, get over the fact that his wife fucked another man have such a loose definition of that sort of thing that I wouldn't feel comfortable being in any type of relationship, be it business or personal, with any of you. Someone with principles and morals doesn't see things as shades of grey but more black and white. Something is either right or wrong depending on the views of the individual being impacted by that thing, not someone on the outside looking in. Your lack of respect for someone like that means little or nothing to them. Or probably anyone else either. Story wasn't meant to be likable and whether Rob was likeable or not is open to interpretation. The fact that after being married as long as they had she didn't know him at all was a pretty telling part of her persona. She was majorly self centered and thought that what she wanted was what everyone wanted. She didn't give the part of herself to her spouse, that part that makes them part of a single team or dare I say, makes them a single entity. Now, no one has to be a carbon copy of their spouse but they need to know each other and be "devoted" to each other and their marriage. As for him not being willing to fight for his wife, he shouldn't have to fight for her by himself. Her job as part of the marriage is to not put herself into situations where she has to be "fought" for. The only way that he should have to protect his marriage is if she can't do her part. She is the guardian of her half of the wedding "contract" and yes marriage is very much like a business merger. If she refuses to do her part, he is fighting with one hand tied behind his back.

That being said, this author had a gift and I am grateful for his sharing it with me. He knew what he wanted to portray in his story and he did so very well. Hard not to get caught up in the story and take sides. Rob lost more by far than Tessa did because he had no say in what she did to destroy their marriage and she had every thing to do with what led up to and finally destroyed what was probably a good marriage. Someone who can coldly do what she did for her own selfish wants with no thought to what it might do to her husband and their marriage couldn't have loved him as much as he loved her. Period. So, hate the story, hate the husband and enjoy your lives poor little annonys, have your Mom get you a hot pocket and some hot chocolate, must be cold in the basement. Sleep tight little annonys and rest so you can kick ass on Literotica comments again tomorrow. Mommy's little bad ass.

He's already told her about 20 times that they aren't getting back together. Why does he feel the need to rub it in her face? What did he gain by going to Atlanta? And leaving him there, talking to Tessa seems an odd ending. Is he going to spend years playing the field? Has he forgotten Sarah? Where the heck is FTDS when you need him? No stars for an unfinished piece of garbage.

weak, weak, weak premise. it was basically a misunderstanding, he just had to say no when she asked about swapping, end of story.