All Comments on 'Frequent Flyer Pt. 04'

??? -- but I read it !!!

Score? No idea how to do that.

5* for entertainment -- I guess ?

Whatever this is, it is NOT an LW story!

oops. And it wasn’t presented as such. Sorry! Feel free to shitcan this and my previous post.

Kind of an adventure. Too bad it didn't make any sense. I guess that was part of the plot?

Thanks for the effort.

Where is the Humor? Where is the Satire?

This was not bad, it had enough story plot changes to keep the interest to the end. Maybe one thing that could have improved the story would have been development of the personal relationship between the main character and his love interest. She remained kind of aloof all the way through even though she was obviously even more responsible for how the story ends than he was. You should think about redoing this story, it has so much going for it but lacks in that aspect. I have as im sure most guys have fantasized about a love interest like this one which is why the development of her part would improve this story so much. 4 Stars

One word Puerile

Very nice.

Still a jumbled up mess, but I did like it. 4 Stars ... Although a little bit of resolution would not have hurt. Thanks.

Good, keep writing