Friendship Found and Lost

Jim must be up so I get out of bed and go into the bathroom and he's in the huge shower and the glass divider is all steamed up.

I'll have to collect Jamie from school later so I wonder what Jim has in mind for the day. More fucking perhaps?

I sit on the loo and pee - he can't see me but something I've learned is that is men quite like the sight of a woman sitting on the john. It must give them a sense of domesticity, of normality and not the commercial transaction that most of my dealings with men are and in any case what would I be hiding? We all pee and I doubt that Jim will mind.

I step into the shower behind him and put my arms around him.

"Good morning lover." I say and I start to wash his chest and belly, sweeping my hands across his torso.

I grab a squirt of shower gel and move onto his back, working from his shoulders, down his back and onto his very cute butt and then between his cheeks, letting my fingers linger and trail across his anus before moving round his hips to his now semi erect member and his balls.

Although not many men will admit it, most find their anus and that area very erogenous and once they've got past their cultural conditioning are very happy to explore further but Jim flinches as I do so I have a good idea what he thinks about it and I can sense that he wasn't entirely happy with me touching his butt.

He's definitely a cock and tits man but hey, each to their own.

Then I check myself. Jim is not a client, he's the guy who wants me to fall in love with him so whatever his tastes, then that's supposed to be ok, so long as they're ok with me.

He's erect again and that's good; making love in the shower is good fun if a little slippery.

I lift my head to him and find his mouth, slipping my tongue between his lips, in and out, signalling what I want.

He's strong enough to lift me onto his erection and I'm certainly wet enough and I start to move easily and slowly, working my mons against the base of his penis and the sensations are wonderful and it won't be long like this until I cum, slowly and gently but then Jim lifts me off and turns me to the wall, ramming his cock in and out of me and he's soon ready to cum, just another few thrusts and he'll be done.

Well, that's all right then.

For him.

I feel used. I know he enjoys sex and so do I but there's nothing in this for me. I thought we were trying to fall in love.

As it is, Jim would be better off with one of the other escorts from the agency. At least they get paid for being fucked like this.

As he fucks me I call over my shoulder.

"Easy baby, I need to be able to walk after this - I have to collect Jamie, remember?"

Jim listens and turns me round, entering me again hard and fast and I can work myself against his cock, rocking back and forth in a steady rhythm until I feel my orgasm building through me and I cum, gripping his shaft as my pussy clenches with each spasm of pleasure.

He must be ready by now and I wait for the hot rush of his cum to fill me and my orgasm is closely followed by Jim pumping his load into me. But somehow it feels meaningless.

With clients I always insist on using a condom, there's just too much risk of catching something without one, and the feel of his hot semen in me reminds me of what we've just done.

Jim holds me briefly and then kisses me and I'm hoping that we'll spend some time together in the shower playing as I'm still feeling a bit down and would like Jim to finger me to another orgasm, his cum making me slippery, but he rinses himself off and leaves me to shower alone and I feel as if he's deserted me.

He's had his fuck and that's that.

Wouldn't he have enjoyed me washing him after our lovemaking? Or perhaps he could have washed me or we could have had fun towelling each other dry.

I just don't know what to do here. I'd always hoped that with the right man we'd feel so close that our foreplay would have us so hot for each other that our lovemaking would be on an epic scale and that afterwards we'd help each other come down from our sexual high with a period of petting and touching, kisses and caresses.

I touch my breasts and run a hand over my belly and then lower, letting my fingers slip between my labia and onto my clit but there's nothing, no response from my body to what I'm doing and I start to cry, wishing it was Jim that was touching me or... anyone.

I have one client, a regular, who is possibly the best lover I've ever had. He's maybe ten years older than me, reasonably fit, no middle age spread.

It was his second visit as I recall and I'd been giving him the girl friend experience, kissing full on, touching him, feeling him shiver as I kissed his nipples and he was doing all this too with me. It was wonderful and I was so wet when he said "I want to taste you," I almost cried, such a lovely way of signalling what he wanted to do, wanting to please me as he indulged himself so I lay back and opened my legs to him and he started to caress me with his tongue, that's the only way to describe it. Not diving straight onto my clit but my belly, my breasts, the insides of my thighs, teasing me, edging me until when I thought I'd have to pull his mouth to me he blew ever so softly on my labia, nuzzling his nose there and then with his tongue, so delicately, his tongue running the length of my slot until when I thought I could wait no longer he found my clit, gently caressing it with the tip of his tongue, circling it, bringing me to a massive orgasm that raced though me and he knew when to pause, drinking my wetness, and then again with his tongue on my clit, bringing me to the edge again and then tipping me over.

I don't know who he is apart from his name and after that I'd roll a condom on him and we'd have sex, not hard pounding fucking, just gentle intercourse and afterwards he'd lie on the bed smiling at me as I showered and dressed, thanking me for my time.

And that would be that until his number came up on my phone again and we'd spend an hour together, pleasing each other. Simple, uncomplicated mutual pleasure, the way it's meant to be but here I was, alone in the shower with Jim's semen leaking from me but nothing from me and I cry, feeling so alone

I wash myself slowly but it's mechanical, not sensuous the way it can be, and then I grab a towel to dry off and wrap it round me.

I can smell coffee coming from the kitchen and wonder what Jim wants to do with the rest of his day.

Jim brings two cups of coffee to the bedroom placing them on the dresser and he comes over to me and kisses my neck.

"You look like you're up for more" and he pulls the towel from me, kissing my neck again and then lower, kissing my breasts and belly and he pushes me back to the bed, not roughly, but the edge of the bed catches me behind my knees and I'm forced to sit.

"Let me lick you till you cum again."

It's as if Jim can read my thoughts. After being left wanting more in the shower, here he is kneeling between my legs offering to 'lick me 'til I cum again' but the moment is gone and the words he uses tell me he doesn't understand what's happening between us and just doesn't understand that sex for women isn't something that is turned on and off like a coffee maker or something that's slotted in to a few spare minutes between one activity and another.

Still I lay back on the bed opening my legs for him, not wanting to confront him. He'll be able to see everything of me as I'm totally shaved, my labia and the pinkness between them and the small hooded bud that is my clit, almost completely hidden now that I'm no longer aroused.

"Mmm, that sounds good," I say but that's Anna talking, not Alice.

He is good with his tongue but I feel about as sexy now as the damp towel that I had around me and I make the appropriate noises so that Jim will think he's made me cum.

Anna is good at that; her clients want to believe that they're great lovers.

We finish up in the bedroom and I think that neither of us were really satisfied.

I have to be home to collect my daughter and I check my agency cell phone.

There's five messages, five missed appointments, $2000 lost while chasing a childhood friendship.

It was good to meet up with Jim again but these things don't always work out.

One of the appointments I missed was with a man called Tom.

Could it be, could lightning strike twice again?

I put on the clothes that I bought yesterday and, leaning into the mirror, add my red lipstick, pressing my lips together to get an even finish and then mouth silently to myself:

"Hi, I'm Anna. It's good to meet you. Do you have something for me?"