All Comments on 'Getting It Right'

Great job. Good backstories, strong character development. Unsurprising but pleasing plot, with a little tension around Daphne. Be careful of spell check. It allows properly spelled but incorrect words. Peek should have been peak, and the resort town in Colorado is Vail, not Vale. But both very minor and did not spoil anything. Thanks for your time and effort.

Outstanding story with great characters!

5

Definitely a very good read. Like many authors you felt the need to inject an obstacle in the plot to avoid the smooth coasting from the split with Mara to family with Hannah. The duplication of Hannah in Daphne was also too contrived, but all in all a good story. 4*

Excellent story.

Was the pizza place on Green Street? Mellow Mushroom?

How should I put it ? The story has a good basis and develops well, but it lacks the "between the lines", the feeling, the emotion - you name it ! All too often the words just read too "technical", merely descriptive, but without being touched themselves ! While reading, I had the feeling that the author had tried to imagine the respective situations, but had not experienced them himself "in his head" - I hope I was able to make myself understood ... ?

How is a story supposed to touch the reader under these circumstances ?

A benevolent 3/5 stars !

3 stars. The story was pretty good but the fact that the cheating skank had zero downside ruined the story for me.

The story is pleasant and well written for the most part. Although it's nice when we get it, nobody's expecting a lot of originality here, and everyone wants a happy ending, so we knew how this was going to play out the moment Charles said his wife was going to be the point person on the job. It just took a while to get there.

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For a romance tale I felt like the women were objectified way too much. Entire paragraphs about their physical attributes in such detail even their bra cup sizes were guessed... come on. No other character was given the same treatment, including Trevor, which I found refreshing. Most of time such details are irrelevant to the plot and unnecessary. If details must be given, and I understand the need to give some with Hannah and Daphne because it actually was related to the plot, reveal them in the course of storytelling instead of rattling off dimensions and such like sports stats. Trust your readers. Leaving some things to their imaginations is much more erotic and interesting than spoon feeding them.

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After the slow pace of the first 3/4s of it, the conflict felt rushed and the resolution even more so, like you got so far and said, ah fuck it, let's slap an ending on this thing, so you finally threw in the conflict and wrapped it up quickly with a pat ending. Either the pacing of the bulk of the story should have been quicker or the ending drawn out more to make the whole feel less lopsided. This includes Hannah's reaction to the would-be indescretion. With the way she responded, she seems to have much more chill than I imagine most women (and let's be honest - men too) would have in that situation, myself included. Given their backstories, the fact that Trevor didn't bother to break up with Mara until after kissing another woman, and the escalated pace of their short relationship, there was plenty of room to explore fallout. Getting engaged in almost the same breath as the confession seems a bit odd to me, but, again it's a romance tale, so I guess it flies.

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Overall, it was an enjoyable read. I may check out some of your other stories.

Congrats on your writing effort. You are off to a good start. Personally, I did not care for " the structure " as you introduced characters. Found myself skimming. Never really got me interested. But ! Because you made the effort to write and I respect that, definately 5 stars. I will keep reading ! You keep writing !

I love your romanticstories and their happy endings

He should've told Charles about his wife's dalliances. But then, I guess the house wouldn't have been built and he wouldn't get paid.

A wonderful story. Thank you! 5 stars.