Gifted Bk. 02 Ch. 08 - The GF Problem

Stanley's left eye cracked open, and then blinked. He looked at me, then at Josh, then he turned his back and walked into his room, leaving the door open. He sat on what was obviously his bed, the other didn't even have any sheets on it. His was made, but disheveled, like he had been laying on it, without pulling the covers down.

We walked in, Josh closed the door, and we sat on the other bed. Stanley sat there with his head down staring at the floor.

"Look Stanley, I'm sorry about last night. I should not have blown up at you like that."

"I don't know why I did it... I'm sorry, I..."

"No, no, it was totally my fault, but that is not really why I'm here... I just want to talk. Ok so you are gay, right?"

His head shot up, a panic starting to build, "What... No, no, I'm not... I'm..."

"Stanley, you were staring at my dick last night... with a hunger in your eyes."

"I..." oh my god, am I gay?

I looked at Josh, he thought to me, Ok, you were right there is more going on here. "Stanley, would it make you more comfortable to know that, Casey is my boyfriend?" Josh said.

Stanley looked back up again, first at Josh, then at me, then back to Josh. "Oh my god, your... but you guys are both jocks?

"Look, Stanley, the point is, we kind of know what you are going through. Talk to us."

He took a dep breath, "I have known for about two years, well, I suspected before that, but I tried dating two years ago. It was horrible. I felt, nothing around girls, well I had a few friends, but I never felt, you know... but I found myself fascinated by guys.

"But this is not something I wanted, I never asked for this, so I tried even harder to find a girl. Even tried to have sex once. It was comical. I could not get hard at all, or at least I could not keep it, the few times I was able to get it up. I left humiliated and ashamed, and even more confused."

"So, what about guys?" Josh asked.

"What? Oh my, no, I mean... I'm not... I... I don't want to be gay."

"Look, Stanley, none of us asks for this life. You can't change yourself... oh you can change your hair, and clothes, and reinvent what you look like. But you can't change who you are inside. You are you. You are gay, and more you fight it, the more pain it is going to cause... trust me I have been there," I put in.

He hung his head and started crying. "But I, I can't. I..."

"Stanley, the more you resist your nature, the more self-destructive you are going to be," Josh said.

Me and Josh were sending waves of support and love toward him. I said, "Stanley, you can do this man. I believe in you. I have an idea. Stanley what are you doing Monday night?"

His head popped up his watery eyes looking at me. "What, Uh, nothing... I'm just going to hang out here in my room. Kinda like I do, every night."

"No, you are not. You are coming with me and Josh to the Blue Stage."

He looked confused for a moment, and the name must have clicked, "What? No, no I am not... that is a Gay bar."

"Well that is part true, Gay, Lesbian, Bisexual, Transgender, Straight... they don't exactly turn anyone away," Josh said.

"But I can't go there, college kids go there..."

"Well sure they do. And guess what, they won't care if you are gay, they will just see a friend, a member of the family. If you are straight, guess what, you are open minded enough to hang out at a gay bar. You will be fine, and you need to get to know other people that share the same lifestyle that you do, or at least you should be." I said a bit exasperated.

"I..."

"Stanley, trust me. You will have a good time, and you will feel better by the end of the night." Josh said, giving him a boost of confidence.

Stanley visibly shifted his posture, straightening up. He sniffed one last time, then started wiping his eyes. "Ok..."

"Ok, cool, we will swing by at seven. Oh, and Stan, wear something nice."