Growth and Lust Ch. 05 - Hurt

Every bit of her body relaxed, turning into his personal fuck toy as he showed his Tallhee lust for her, Samaran felt him gasp. His chest rising and his muscles flexing, then she felt her body being slammed down with her midsection being pushed out. Her voice cracked slightly as she felt his hard cock swell and then pulse hard inside her, she felt heat filling her body. She was positive her tummy would be swollen to the shape of a pregnant woman's, the quick thought made her have another fall into the waves of pleasure once again.

Desher, held her in place, his mind going blank as his body shook, slight humps upwards into his woman as he pumped her full of Tallhee cum. He could feel it filling her, seeping slightly from around his rigid cock that corked her pussy closed and full of his seed. He held her like that, grunting and squeezing her tightly. He could feel her trembling and gasping, she felt so limp and tired in his grip, he sat on his feet with his legs folded beneath him. Samaran still in his grip but now slouched back on him, shaking breaths as she rubbed her stomach with one hand.

"Samaran," he said, watching her slowly look up at him, fuck drunk eyes asking him for one more touch. He leaned down, kissing her on the lips again, delicately thanking her for the night of passion that he wouldn't forget.

They broke the kiss, seeing his cock begin to loosen from her thoroughly used hole, Samaran gasped as it came free. Thick Tallhee seed gushing from her and coating his knees, she slowly put a hand to her sex, feeling the sting of a well-used tool.

"Are you ok?" Desher asked hesitantly.

Samaran raised her hand, seeing strings of sticky cum clinging to her digits, she wondered if it would taste like cinnamon as well. Bringing her fingers to her lips, she dipped one into her mouth, letting her head fall back and her eyes looking at Desher. She could see he wasn't expecting this, ensuring she got a hefty amount on her tongue she showed it to him, then staring into his eyes as she closed her mouth and swallowed. She parted her lips again, showing him that his gift was well received, she could feel his breath catch in his throat. "I'm better than ok...I love you..."

*

'Mine never abandoned me...'

Ginrars eyes shot open and she spun out of her bed, slamming into the floor of the shuttle and pausing, she slowly pulled her appendages in. Getting her knees and elbows underneath her as she balled her fist and grit her teeth. Tears fell from her eyes as she threatened the floor with a growl, "I never abandoned him." She stated coldly, a whispering affirmation for the empty air around her, she shivered and squeezed her eyes shut.

......

Roke laid silent on the floor of the dark room; he had tried to stand but found his balance was gone. The room spinning and sending him to the floor in a dry heaving mess, during his fall he also learned he couldn't feel the touch of concrete on his fingertips. Realizing that he now had no way to tell what was around him, deaf hands slamming into something hard and unrelenting. He opened his mouth to whisper a damming curse to his predicament. But had frozen, the tongue inside his maw had failed to perform, had failed to even appear as it was now missing. Closing his mouth he understood the room wasn't dark, he just didn't have the proper ability to see it anymore.

That was some time ago, left to his own solitude he silently breathed in and out. His body being too well built to let him slip away from suffering alone, he could do nothing but silently contemplate. Thinking of red skin so supple to the fingers that used to feel, the once abundant cinnamon kisses now gone forever. A caring smile of fang and protection that enveloped him in love, it would have brought a tear to his eye. But that ability was gone as well, he wished he could just say her name. As if the whispering affirmation would ensure him that his time with Gin was real, tangible and not a dream that would drift from his mind.

'Roke.'

The voice was rough, not one he had heard before, he resisted it as he tried to not let his mind fall into the abyss. Left with no physical connection to the world around though he couldn't help but worry that he would soon go mad. The sense of falling never leaving his disenchanted mind, this was his life now, a never-ending void of everything.

'Roke.

It was louder now, he wondered how twisted his mind was that he could so easily strip his given name. Wearing the stolen one like armor against his past, a fearful thought rising to the surface of his silent suffering. 'Do I have it too, what she had, why I-' before the vivid memory of human blood stinging his childhood eyes could fill his mind. He felt something grab him.

Powerful fingers wrapping around his face, sharp claws digging into cheek as something formed in the darkness of his mind.

Red.

So Red.

Why is it so Red?

Strong.

'Roke!'

It shook his core, no eyes to see or fingers to touch with, this was something else. Something inhuman, so much stronger, so much more dangerous.

'Roke!'

He felt fear, he felt his world spin and his heart sink as he wondered if this is how it would happen. His mind finally unraveling and his soul breaking as the deprivation of sensory input left him to drift through nothingness.

'She calls out to you.'

He froze, his spirit surrounded by drifting stars in the tides of an incorporeal ocean while waterfalls of intangible essence poured into it. Frozen against the brilliant waves that came as vivid visions of colors he couldn't begin to grasp, frothing and churning to yank him away. But his spirit held, something anchoring him against an afterlife's unimaginable wake.

'She calls to you, Roke.'

Lines; dark and intricate, dancing and waving as the canvas of red stood like the light house in the storm. Powerful waves not understanding why he did not wash away; but moving to continue without care. Cinders dancing to create a form with winds of life filled with light, his mind not feeling contained but free. Free of the walls of a skull, the prison of self-identity broken and torn away as acceptance came to be.

'Will you answer?'

Visions of red, 'Ginrar-' twisting lips that cried for forgiveness, 'that's my Ginrar,' gripping fingers that yearned for touch. 'My Ginrar,' angelic smiles that cooed her taunts, 'MY Ginrar,' Sobbing rings of fire that demanded retribution, 'MY GIN!'

Roke felt his right hand slap against the wrist that held the vice like grip to his face, eyes forming as his body pooled into a silhouette. His left hand slamming into the wrist, his lips twisting in snarling vitality as he refused to fall into the sweeping tide of stars that cascaded around them.

'Roke.'

He blinked and stood firm, staring into the burning rings of an elder that time refused to touch. Roke watched the lines on his arm steadying as his form came to focus, the red daunting shape of a prince. He understood, seeing him once before, printed to paper and giving him a gift that he didn't deserve.

'Tentyur-' Roke said.

'Roke.' He retorted.

Roke stayed silent for a moment, feeling a headache starting as he looked at the calm eyes of the Tallhee man in front of him. He remembered how he had awoken next to Ginrar, after the ceremony was finished and he was tied to her. Seeing the gifted arm and feeling something inside, feeling like he wasn't worthy of it.

He remembered it hurt him when he first saw it, not because it was Tallhee. But because it was so gracious to someone who should have been left in the dark. Kindness that he didn't deserve, but he squeezed the fingers of his right hand into it, pulling at the skin. Pulling the red arm towards his body and hugging it, fearing that it may be taken away.

It was his then, he was sure it was for the wrong person, but that didn't mean he would return it. No, no he would never get it back, he would never let this arm be taken away from him. But now standing in front of Tentyur, a cold feeling of failure washed over him, seeing it was now back with him.

Did it make him cynical, did he believe he was owed it? He pursed his lips and remembered that first day with it. Ginrars smile, the vision tried to pull him into a trance, imagining for a moment her still lying in that bed. Pulling his arm to bring him closer, to embrace him in that quiet room, sealed away from the horrors of the lives they lived outside of it.

'No.' he told himself, dreams can come later, but this needed to be asked. 'Why me?'

Tentur squinted, as if the question was so outrageous he didn't feel the need to waste the breath on an explanation. He closed his eyes and then answered, 'You forgave her.'

'Who, Ginrar?' Roke asked, leaning closer as the answer wasn't reaching him.

'No. Before her.'

He racked his mind, chastising it for not catching up with what he was hearing, the headache starting to throb.

'The first woman.'

'Uh- Savanna?'

Tentyur tilted his head, a mix of hurt and hope swirling in his words, 'The first woman, the first one we all meet.'

Roke shuffled his words like puzzle pieces in his head.

'The first woman you loved, the first woman that held you, the one that brought you to fruition.'

Rokes eyes widened, feeling his eyes welling with water.

'The first woman you killed.'

Roke trembled, almost falling to the words, 'I- I didn't know-'

'Yet you forgave her. Everyday you think of her, and you don't hate her.'

Roke saw he wasn't judging him, but speaking with a form of gratitude on his tongue.

'You forgave her.'

Roke stayed silent, watching Tentyur turn his face away from him, looking to his left. Roke followed his gaze, looking out into a sea of stars that made him feel so dwarfed in the magnitude of nothing. But a small light moved different from the rest, he squinted as he noticed it, glancing to Tentyur and wondering if he was watching it as well.

He witnessed in the blink of an eye a white shape close the distance and drive into him, his frame rigid as he wondered if it would hurt. But with no semblance of pain, he examined the change in surroundings, a ships seating area with crew inside.

Their shapes were dark, like shadows that were slightly transparent to his vision. In an instant he felt his throat tighten and a grace of reassurance surround him, seeing Saffee was part of the crew. He felt his eyes burn as she looked concerned, touching the shoulder of another woman who was sitting in the pilots seat. Focusing on gauges and star maps with an understanding nod in acknowledgment of something Saffee asked. He couldn't hear it as they seemed muted to him, not sure if it was his hearing or where they were.

Looking back he saw Tentyur standing further in the shuttle, watching him and giving him a nod to follow. Roke tried to step forward but felt himself appear next to Tentyur, his will alone seeming to move him through the hull. Looking back from his position now he saw another Tallhee sitting in one of the seats, fingers gently holding a book and flipping the page. It was a man, a Tallhee man, Roke could see his four-pointed crown and a weary look on his face. Pausing the man looked across the shuttle, then turned to look where the two silent viewers were standing. Roke could see the Tallhee look through him and down the hall, no notice to either of them given.

Roke began to turn, seeing Teloo standing from her seat, he smiled at her. Knowing she couldn't see him but grateful that she had given him a glimpse into Gins past. He looked to Tentyur, seeing he was standing down the hallway of the shuttle. Just before he could will himself to move he saw the door next to him slide open followed by a face appearing from it.

Roke felt ice run through him, his soul quaking at a familiar face coming into view. A yellow woman that he thought he'd never see again, Bakaree stepping through the threshold and into the hallway. Stepping through him and out to the main area, Roke spun around to see her back, ensuring that she was the Mohreb that saved him once before.

He had to pull himself away, looking back to Tentyur as the red Tallhee stoically waited for him. Watching Roke silently, Roke moved towards him. Feeling his spirit stop in front of a door, cold resonating from it, aching and anger writhing and twisting to bend the transcendent world he was residing in for the moment.

He wanted inside; needed to be in there, his will coming to fruition as he was now standing in the dark room. The red figure of a woman in front of him, facing away and looking down to the floor. She wasn't transparent like the others on board though, she wasn't shaded either, bright and shining. She raised her head that was still turned away, four points on her crown as she seemed to ponder something. Then slowly turning around, in that moment Roke noticed two others in the room. One of the shaded crew on the floor, and to his surprise what looked like another human on board. She was shining and visible, just like the red Tallhee that was turning around. The human watched the one on the floor before turning up to look at him quickly, then fading away into nothing. Blonde hair and a white gown burned into his vision for a moment as it seemed so bright.

Roke watched the opaque Tallhee face him, then tipping her head to look at him. Directly at him and not through him, seeing his smaller human self and letting her judging gaze grip him tightly. He watched as she shifted from his vision and vanished, disappearing just like the human and leaving only one other in the room.

He saw the shuddering back of the broken form on the floor stop, its head hanging somberly as it pushed itself from its stupor. Turning around and sending a chill down his spine, eyes scowling as tears ran down her cheeks. The brutal daughter that was once returned now going back to the stars, he wanted to reach out. To touch her, to tell her he was near and he could see her, but no matter how hard he tried it failed to come true.

'Gin-' he whispered.

Ginrar stood silently in the room, visceral hate and a yearning for blood shaking her soul as she demanded the cosmos bend to her will. Bring what was hers, put him in front of her or by the suns that warm the living she would strangle the universe in vengeful retribution. She would spit in the face of whatever omnipotent power thought it was a good idea to put such a fine man in front of her just to take him away. To give her a taste of that sweet and inebriating drink that was love, honest and unyielding. True bare love that made her think for a moment that she wasn't the monster she was born to be.

"Roke-" she hissed through clenched teeth, her fangs wishing for flesh to tear into. Bathing her lips in the coppery flavor of a crimson victory, oh she would have her revenge. The Blackstars, the damned, she would consume them name and all after eviscerating their begging souls. Begging for mercy, mercy like he bestowed upon her, cloaking her in a warmth she didn't deserve but he so readily offered.

Roke witnessed it all, his resolve reiterated as he snarled himself, he stormed forward through the space. Reaching out now as the galaxy obliged the demand of the queen and allowed him to move.

Ginrar felt something, two hands on her cheeks as an entity came near, then hearing it. So quiet she almost thought it was a mad delusion, but knowing it had to be real. Whispered on the air that huffed from her lungs as she tensed. The sweet cadence of her lover from across the galaxy as she felt the gods themselves back down from her challenge.

'Run to the stars, I love you Ginrar.'

Roke felt himself yanked backwards and out of the room, looking back down the hallway and seeing Teloo walking through him. Then seeing the Tallhee man sitting still with a pensive stare on his face. The opaque Tallhee woman resting a hand on his shoulder and watching Roke, a stern gaze burning into him.

Looking back to the Tallhee as something clicked inside, 'I know you.' Her face was familiar, older now than when he had first seen her. The worried look she wore at that time when she was taken away, was now gone as ferocious power emblazoned her.

In the blink of an eye his surroundings changed again, Roke found he was floating, the fleeting sight of a light vanishing into an ocean of stars.

'It will hurt, but you are quite used to pain little one.' The gruff voice of Tentyur said.

Roke willed himself to turn in the void, seeing Tentyur watching him. Replying, 'We're like old friends.'

'Are we now?'

'Pain and I, I've lived in it, consumed it.'

'But still you endure, little one.' Tentyur said.

'How did Bakaree join them?' Roke asked.

Tentyur smiled, 'I find Mohrebs trustworthy.'

Roke waited to see if he would offer an actual answer, but wasn't going to push for one. He was somehow removed from his own carcass and drifting through a different space, he wondered if any human had ever seen this place. Then he remembered the human woman that was in the room with Ginrar, her face was sad for the short moment he saw it. Roke starred into Tentyurs eyes, focusing on the burning rings as a bubble of thought formed in his own mind. 'Samaran.' Roke thought.

Tentyur smiled.

'How do I know that?' Roke said in confusion as he glared back at Tentyur.

Another thought crept into Rokes mind, something that shouldn't be there but revealed itself with ease. That feeling someone has when they remember something, that fleeting 'aha' moment as they couldn't believe they forgot it. The vision of a shuttle coming down to grass, the jet wash whipping the scenery into a frenzy as the hum of engines slowed their whine. Looking at Tentyur, seeing the man was watching him with an expecting look on his face.

This memory wasn't Rokes, but it still presented itself in his minds eye all the same. It throbbed, but the look he saw from Tentyur made him think he was supposed to remember it. Seeing Tentyur standing in the grass, letting the shuttle finish its landing and silence itself.

Tentyur watched the ramp open, he could feel it seeping out and bathing him. Remorse, angst, the constant screaming as a pained being demanded an ending be pushed away. Something returned, something stolen, it felt like an acrid cloud enveloped him as the ramp finished its travel and settled on the ground.

It was the yellow one he saw first, a Mohreb man in a disheveled mess with his back to the wall. One of his upper hands falling from the door button as an exasperated breath left his lungs, Tentyur could see it was one of his few left. The pungent sent of blood hanging in the shuttle as it bathed the floor and walls.

Tentyur made his way up the ramp he could see someone else in the hull, a smaller being sitting on something wrapped in tattered linens. Whatever it was, it screamed internally for the end to be cheated. But as he looked down on the dying Mohreb, he could see his mind was calm and ready.

'River-'

Tentyur heard the word of thought seep into the air, he knelt down to provide a final kindness to the man. Pushing his head up Tentyur could see he wouldn't be able to speak, his jaw hanging crooked as the flesh on his face was torn. Seeing the Mohrebs eyes losing focus as they let go, Tentyur spoke to him. "I'm here, I hear you." Letting the dying man know he wasn't alone.

Friend, foe, stranger; it didn't matter, a beings final words must counted. Written to paper or thought it was a right of life to be able to give your last as the air left your lungs. Tentyur understood this, waiting for the man to give his.

'River-...I shall taste-' his eyes emptied for a moment, but came back to give his last. 'The divine wine.'

Tentyur watched the man let go, flowing down the river to see his ancestors, to partake in their wine and tell them of how he danced. He pursed his lips, holding his emotions at bay as this was never an easy event to bear. Tentyur could see the mans tenacity with what he left behind, blood painted across the walls. Echoing screams from the afterlife that refused to accept they had been bested, their cries rang out in his mind.