Happy Divorce

It was a Wednesday night and I had a hard week so far from work. Tomorrow another day I was hoping it would get better for the last two days. There I was sipping my drink staring at the TV wondering what went wrong. Was I to blame or was she to blame. Well, it was too late for us now.

I had to put the last nine dreaded months behind me once and for all. God nine months had past. We could have had a crying baby in the house by now but that was not to be.

I had re-joined my old mates in the last few weeks. Two of them were still single and one was divorced like me. He had hard time of it but mine was not too bad.

Soon it would be Friday night. I was going out with friends. Was also girl's night out. I now hated girl's night out. Because that's where I was now. Divorced and still feeling sorry for myself. What the hell did I do wrong. I have her everything she asked for and more besides. What did I do wrong. Kept on going through my head. I had to move on and get my life back on track.

Friday night the four of us would be heading out to a dance hall or a pub all night. The pub won game of darts then a snooker match with a side bet only a Quid not much.

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Saturday morning. The post had arrived early or a change. I was just one letter. I sat down and used my sliver letter knife opener.

I was a divorce card!

It said," happy divorce!"

Some smart jerk was taking the piss out of me. I opened the card and there was an inscription on one side in someone's neat hand writing. With an envelope inside the card.

This is what was written inside the card.

Sorry please read the letter.

This is what I read.

First please except my apologies for the breakup of your marriage. I should have stuck to my guns. I am going to tell you every what went on from the first day. I meet your ex-wife twelve months ago. That day I started where your ex-wife worked, I was given a guided tour of the place. Then I was introduced to your ex-wife. Our eyes meet. I was smitten with her and she with me. I looked at her hands. I wanted to know if she was married or not. The rings were in plain sight she was married. Too bad. I had to stay away from her! Was my first thought.

Married women can cause problems for me, her and her husband. What I meant is cheating causing the husband to do something he would regret. As for me having a few broken bones cuts and bruises. Cheating love affairs. I wanted none of them. I wish I had stuck to my guns back then.

Sorry it was not my fault she wanted me. She forced me into causing your marriage to break up. I think you know that by now. I am a confirmed Batcheler. She is under the impression. I am going to marry her. That will never happen. She will be out the door. One day soon.

I bet she will be running back to you with all types of tales of what I have done to her. Pleading that she is sorry for what she did to you, And saying the same old things I love you and only you. Don't fall for it. She loves herself. But you know that already don't you.

If I was you move on and take that other job you had been offered months ago. Sorry about the sick card. But I think you are better off without her. She is a slut and I think she is cheating on me for the last month. If she is she's in for a big shock.

We worked close together week in week out and we had lunch quite often together. I kept my distance. But your ex got even more friendly with me at work. What I mean her hand went up my leg and rubbed my cock through my pants.

Yes, I told her to stop but it fell on deaf ears. I had said to her a dozen of times stop it you are a married woman. And I only date single girls. Well, she did not stop but I remembered the first day we meet. When our eyes meet. I was smitten with her and she with me.

If you a remember she had to go away for two days with work. I was with her. We were away for three nights. After dinner on the first night, we were in her bedroom. We had only just finished our first sexual experience. When you rang her. I sat on the bed and all the time you were taking. She wanked me off and sucking my cock. Then I shot my load in her face. If I remember right, she told you she was eating a cream cake. The rest of the night I fucked her. But now to come to think about it she fucked me.

The Monday and Wednesday's nights. She had told you she had to try and finish that project she was working on. And then the same other projects she told you about. Were a load of lies she gave to you. We were in the hotel in room 421 but you after some time you found out. From that friend of yours.

The Monday and Wednesday's nights only lasted for two hours. She could not get enough of me and she wanted more and more time with me. We had to keep to a ridged time so you would not suspect anything. Then she cancelled her girl's night out with her friends. In the same room I fucked her she fucked me. I don't have to go into any detail. But she told me she when she got home to you. As soon as her head it the pillar, she was asleep dreaming about me. So, so sorry I fucked up your marriage.

I wasn't going to tell you this but she had an affair for three months before I meet her. With a chap in the same office. If you didn't know I am sorry for telling you but he lives. Round the corner from you. I believe he's married with a little boy. He is trying for a second affair with your ex. So, she is a slut. But you know that don't you.

I don't mind telling you that friend of yours who saw us. I wish he had seen us weeks before.

When you came in the hotel room that Friday night, I could not have seen a more charmer person in all my life. I expected I was going to A and E. Thank you for not taking it out on me. It was all down to her not me.

When she returned home you were starting to pack her things.

I believe you asked her the big question WHY. She did not give you a straight answer but kept on saying the same old thing. I love you it was just sex with him. You slept in the main bedroom and she in the spare room.

After that night you filed for a divorce. She moved in with me. During the divorce she wanted to stop me from being a confirmed Batcheler. That was never going to happen. I went out seeking single girls at night and going back home late. She knew exactly what I was doing. But she had to put up with it.

Well last week I found out she was cheating on me; remember I am a confirmed Batcheler. I have given my notice to quit my job last Friday I will be moving on from the rented flat on Saturday next. The lease as a week to run.

Move on as best you can. She's a slut and loves herself. By the way I have had better sex with women twice her age she thinks she is god gift to men. Beware when the doorbell rings soon.

Once again so sorry for fucking up your marriage. It was her not me.

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The card had been sent to me last Tuesday. That meant he was moving as I read the happy divorce card. What was interesting. I had found out she had affair with John Smith from round the corner and he was after her once again.

Well, I got on with my weekly house chores. You know the things to do front and back gardens and wash the car. Then out for my weekly shop. On Sunday do the weekly washing then the ironing. Hover throughout the house then I went to the pub for lunch and later had my dinner. I ponder what was going to happen next. At least a week I had to wait. Her ex-lover had left. And the lease was up she had no agreement with the landlord. He had set her up she was going to have nowhere to live.

Three weeks had passed it was a Saturday morning there came a knock at the door. I was ready for her. I opened the door looking right through my ex-wife.

"Yes, Kim nice to see you and what do I devise the honour of this visit," I said to her.

"Frank, may I come in I want to disuses a few things with you," Kim said.

"Yes, come in want a coffee and a biscuit since you have called by, "I said.

"Coffee would be nice," Kim said in a quiet voice.

I poured out two coffee's and I ate a biscuit. Waiting for her to speak. She was fidgeting all the time and I knew why. I looked at her she was still as sexy as she was twelve months before but we were divorce. I waited for her to say something. Why she had called in on me. I could see on her face she didn't really know what to say. Hell, no she had to start the conversation not me. Drinking my coffee slowly and eating more than one of my biscuits. I let her sweat a little. Then at last she started to talk.

"Frank, I have made a terrible mistake," Kim said.

"What have done wrong at work this time. How can I help you put it right. You know I can fix it for you with your boss. Tell me what you have done," I said.

Fidgeting more and more with every second. With her eyes looking down.

"Frank, it's not work. I have made a terrible mistake I would like to make it up to you if I can," Kim said it sounded sincere.

"What is it, Kim."

So, so sorry for what I did twelve months ago I should have told him to shove off. I told him I am a happy married women but he seduced me he was a cad. Should have told you right away. He forced me to divorce you. Frank, I love you so much and always have please forgive me he was a brut to me.

"Kim tell me what he has been doing to you. I will go and break every bone in his cheating body," I said with rage in my voice to convince her.

"No, no Frank don't do that. I want us to get back together again. I want to be your wife again. I will do anything you ask of me. And be a good housewife. I need you to make you love me again. I loved you and only you and I know 100% you loved me. Please Frank I want to come back home and be a loving trusting wife like I was twelve months before he seduced," Kim said.

I wanted to burst out laughing my head off, But I wanted to see how far she would go. She went over all the goodtime we had and the sex we had over and over. It was all whitewash.

"Frank, can I come back home," Kim said.

"Kim please tell me where your lover is right now, I want a word or two with him."

"No, no Frank you will kill. I won't tell you please let us be man and wife I love you so much."

"Kim before I make my mind up, I have to tell you a few things." I said smiling at her.

That made her think she was coming back to me. Not a fat chance of that.

"Kim let me speak without you butting in please."

She nodded.

"Kim, you cheated on me with that asshole. We got divorced I was a broken man, You got half of everything. I have to take out a heavy loan to keep the house. Just a second I have something here you that will interest you."

I got up and picked up the happy divorce card!

"Kim, I would like you to read this card before I give you, my answer."

"Frank, I love you and only you I will read it for you."

I handed to her the envelope with the card and letter inside. She opened it and she pulled out the card and letter.

On the front It said," happy divorce!"

"What jerk sent you this," she said.

"Kim read the letter please."

I was crunch time now.

She read the letter looking at me from time to time. Then the tears came.

"It's all true Kim. And you have a replacement lover that lives round the corner John Smith don't you. And as it says in the letter you love yourself. There not a hope of love in you for me. God's gift to men. Don't make me laugh. I think you know my answer. And don't ever come back. By the way I have a date tonight and if she will have me, I will be married soon. You know where the door is and close it on your way-out Slut.