He Used To Be My Idol

I found out through Ross that Morse had put the pressure on them to talk me round. That just drove my desire to keep him locked out.

A month later, it was done and dusted. I was officially a millionaire, well a multi-millionaire. The new consoles went into production and they were a hit, a world wide hit. Virtual reality was the new buzzword, and to have this level of sophistication took us to the top of the market.

What killed me was the continual travel, back and forth from LA to San Fran. It drove me nuts. The company wanted me to move to LA, because when I floated a couple of other ideas past them, they were pretty keen to do the development in-house.

I guess if I had one dream in my life, it was a house by the water. With the money in my bank, I decided to make that dream a reality.

My search began, and it didn't take long. I found the perfect place. It was set back from the beach on Sea Vista Drive, and it came in just under one million. I was happy.

The deal settled quickly and I moved in. The only thing missing was furniture. Talking to one of the office girls who I casually dated led me to a design house in Santa Monica. Walking in made me suck in a deep breath. Holy shit. This was something I hadn't really done before. Everything I had, was brought at discount stores. Wandering around in there made me realise I was out of my depth.

Walking around, I was met by a sales girl, who appeared from nowhere. "Can I help you, sir?"

"Perhaps. I have just brought a property and I need some guidance. I'm new at this."

She smiled. "Have a look around, I will go and get the boss. She might be able to help."

As I continued to rummage through their stock I heard a voice from my past behind me. I turned slowly. "Hey, Kayla."

She dropped her clipboard. "Luke, what are you doing here?"

"I brought a house down by the beach, and I need some help. Is this your place?"

Zoned out, she replied haltingly. "Yes, this is mine. You say you brought a place? I heard you were living in San Francisco?"

"I had to move back for work."

"Did you say you brought a place?"

"Uh-huh, sure did."

"By the beach, you said?"

"Yeah, Sea Vista Drive actually."

"Wow, holy shit, that's an expensive suburb."

I laughed, "You're right there. I think I got one of the few going for less than one mill."

She giggled softly. "You did well to get that. What exactly are you looking for, Luke?"

"Honestly, I don't know. I have this nice house, which has no furniture. I'm currently sleeping on the floor. I thought I would get some help."

Sounding somewhat bitter, she snorted. "So you thought you would come here and rub my nose in it?"

"What? God no. I didn't even know you owned this place. One of the office girls recommended it to me. I can see this isn't going to work. I'll look elsewhere." I started striding purposefully for the door when she cried out. "Stop, wait up, Luke."

She walked up behind me. "I'm sorry, that was unfair. I didn't know. I was just reacting."

I nodded. "Yeah, weird huh. Even after all this time, it still hurts."

She nodded hesitantly. "Yes, yes it does."

She gave me a thin smile. "I need to have a look at the place, before I can offer any suggestions."

"Are you free tonight? We could go and have a look?"

"I'm free now ,actually. If you are still interested."

I nodded. "Yes, I'm interested. Is it going to be weird for you though?"

"Luke, we are adults, I'm a professional. I can do this."

We walked outside and when I led her over to the old Blazer, she giggled. "You can afford a new house, yet you drive this old heap around."

"Yeah, I like her, she never lets me down."

Walking into the new house, Kayla sucked in a big breath. "Wow, must be a huge mortgage?"

"No mortgage."

She looked at me incredulously. "You're joking. You brought this, and paid cash?"

I nodded. "Yep, sure did."

"Holy crap, Luke. Wow, what did you do, win the lottery?"

"Nope, just my hard work finally paid off. Some of those old computer games I designed sold."

she gave me a new look, impressed.

We wandered around the house, and she took lots of photos and took plenty of notes. She gave me an appraising sort of sideways glance. "What's our budget?"

"Well, I hadn't thought about it. I want it to fit the house. I don't want monstrous old stuff. I want modern and sleek. But, it would be nice if you went easy on me. I'm not made of money."

She laughed as she walked into the bedroom and saw my sleeping bag on the floor, and my clothes still in suitcases. "You do need some help, don't you."

"Yeah, I guess I do."

As we drove back to her shop I said. "You have obviously done all right. That shop seems pretty successful."

She shrugged it off. "Yes, we are doing okay."

"We?" I asked.

"Yes, I have a business partner. An investor who put up the money to get it started."

My mind went straight to Morse. "Right, feeling guilty was he?"

"What the hell are you talking about, Luke?"

"Morse, is he your secret investor?"

"Don't be ludicrous. My business partner is a woman. Rogan did loan me some money when we got back from Costa Rica." She sneered irritably. "Somebody took all the money out of our account."

I felt a tinge of guilt, it was petty. "Yeah, I'm sorry for that, Kayla. I was feeling betrayed and angry. It was petty. I apologise."

She grimaced. "It's okay. I deserved it. I know I have said it already, but I will try again. I am sorry, Luke. I never meant to hurt you."

"It's all water under the bridge now, Kayla. We have both moved on. We have new lives."

I saw her eyes glistening, as she wiped away a tear. "Do you have somebody special, Luke?"

"No, I have dated, but nobody special."

"Are you dating at the moment?"

"I'm not looking for anybody. I'm busy with work. What about you?"

"The same, I have had a few dates, but nobody special."

"What about Morse?"

She swallowed hard before whispering. "We are friends, but that one time is the only time we were ever intimate."

I glanced across at her and I could see she was struggling to keep it all together. As we pulled up outside her shop, I asked. "When can you have something for me?"

"How about Friday? I could have some designs ready by then."

It affected me seeing her again. I remembered why I fell in love with her in the first place. She was attractive without being movie star beautiful. She was funny, bright, and most importantly, she got me, she understood my quirks.

Thursday I got a call from her. "Luke, would you like to meet for lunch? I have some designs that you might like to see."

"Sounds good, what about the Fig Tree? Twelve-thirty okay for you?"

"Yes, see you there."

She looked sensational, and I felt my heart flutter a little. Even with everything that had passed between us, she got to me. "Jesus, what are you doing, you damn fool," I muttered to myself as I walked up to her table.

She welcomed me with a smile and passed me a folder with some designs and sketches, photos of furniture and some mock layouts.

We ordered and talked idly, the conversation light, and a little banter developed. It was suddenly like old times. It felt natural, not forced, but elevating.

it was nice and I felt a little empty walking back to work. Friday came all too slowly, but she called late Friday. "Sorry, Luke, we have been incredibly busy. I have the mock ups done. Are you free tonight?"

We met at a bar down by the beach. We ordered dinner and she got out her laptop and went over the design suggestions. They all looked perfect and I couldn't find fault with them. We talked some colour changes, artwork and general suggestions. It was peasant. The food was nice and, we had a couple more drinks. As we finished up, she said, "Would you like a walk on the beach?"

"Yeah, that would be nice."

As we walked, she said, "I've really missed you, Luke. I was devastated when you left, completely lost."

"You seem to have done all right," I countered.

"I'm not talking about that. I'm talking about inside. You walked out and left me. You gave me no chance to talk to you, no chance to try and repair things. It was so cold. I hated you for that."

"Yeah, well, you weren't exactly top of the charts with me either, Kayla. Let's not forget why I walked out."

"But you never gave us a chance. Never even talked to me. Here one day, gone the next."

"Kayla, going back over this isn't helping. It's history."

"No, Luke, it's not. It's been an open wound ever since you walked out of my life. You didn't give us a chance. There was no closure."

"I don't understand what you mean, Kayla. What did you want me to do?"

"Why couldn't you wait and talk to me when I got back? We came back as soon as we got Candice's call. All you had to do was wait for one day. Then we could have talked it out. Tried to fix things."

"You wanted me to hang around here while you were away on your dirty weekend with douche bag, and I was just supposed to hang around? Sorry, Kayla, I told you what was going to happen if you left with him. I gave you a warning. Fuck, what more could I have done?"

She burst into tears and feel to her knees. "Nothing," she screeched. "You're right, it was my fault. I should have left with you. I made a stupid mistake, but why couldn't you wait?"

I sat down beside her and pulled her into an embrace. "I told you want was going to happen, Kayla. I don't understand why you can't understand my perspective."

"I don't, Luke, I just don't. You blew up the world. Quit your job, walked out of our life. Left me with all the bills, took all the money. I didn't get a chance to even say goodbye."

Her body shuddered with the ferocity of her sobs. "I'm sorry, Luke, I really am. I would do anything to take it all back, anything."

"It's done, Kayla, I accept your apology. It was a crazy stupid night. You said you hated me, well I hated you more. I could have happily killed Morse, the sleazy bastard. I hope one day to make him pay."

"Luke, that's silly. He tried to apologise to you. He flew us both up to San Francisco to help mend things. He felt bad for what happened."

"No he didn't, Kayla. If he had any morals, he wouldn't have done it in the first place. You don't meddle in other peoples marriages. It's wrong. He destroyed ours."

This time she didn't try to argue his defence. "You're right, again. He was wrong to do it, and I was an idiot for listening."

We sat for a while and a few people walked past. I said, "Come on. Lets get you home."

I drove her to her place and pulled up in the drive way. She whispered. "Are you happy, Luke, I mean really happy?"

"I'm getting there. It took a long time to get over the bitterness. I lost my faith in people, trusted nobody. I'm better now, though, the trust is returning. What about you?"

"I feel terrible. I thought I was over you. I thought I had moved on, but seeing you again has just opened up all those old wounds, and I realise... I still love you."

Her eyes were full of tears, her body trembling as she sat with her head in her arms. It made me feel terrible, as well. I didn't want to hurt her, well, maybe.

"Kayla, I always loved you. From the moment we met, I loved you, wanted you. That night at that damn party you broke my heart. Seeing you flirting and dancing like lovers with Morse, that devastated me. I felt totally betrayed. I can't get past that. I can't get rid of those images. Maybe one day, but not at the moment. The reason I had to go is, I didn't want to give you the satisfaction of seeing how broken I was."

She sniffled and sobbed. "I'm sorry, what can I do?"

"Kayla, there's nothing to do. If this is too difficult, then perhaps we should go back to the way it was. Live our own lives."

"No!" she said firmly. "I want you in my life, it's just difficult, because I do love you, and miss you."

She jumped out and ran inside, slamming the door behind her. I sat staring at the house. It was pretty nice place, I wondered if she owned it, or just rented.

Driving back to my place gave me time to think and clear my head. God, seeing her again brought back every single memory. We met young and fell in love and quickly became a couple. We did everything together. Even after we married, we lived for each other. We had the same friends, the same interests, she loved to boogie board while I surfed. I did try to teach her, but she never truly got the hang of it.

With my mind flooded with images and memories, I parked and walked into my new house. Sleep was no easier, I couldn't wipe away the memories.

Kayla called me in the morning. "Luke, I'm sorry about last night. My little meltdown wasn't fair. Do you still want me to start ordering in the furniture?"

"Yes, please. I would like to have something more comfortable than the floor to sleep on."

She laughed lightly. "Got it. I can have the larger stuff, beds, and lounge furniture there by Tuesday, they are available locally. Do you want to buy your own electronics, TV's and the like?"

"Yeah, I'll get all that shit. If you could focus on furniture, and rugs."

My big focus at the moment was stage two of my VR. I had something that was going to blow the computer game industry apart, it was going to take gaming to a whole new level. I was close, really close, and I knew it was going to set me up for the rest of my life.

My current alliance with Digiwurld was great, and they had given me enormous support. What annoyed me was they treated me like an employee, which I wasn't. Their expectations that all my new discoveries and developments would automatically be theirs as well, really got under my skin.

This was going to be bigger than my previous inventions. My plan was to give Digiwurld first option, but I knew how much this was worth, and I wasn't going to give it away.

The furniture arrival meant seeing Kayla regularly, and every time we met, it got easier. We could talk without tears and anger. It took a couple of weeks before it was finished, and I had to take my hat off to Kayla. She did a great job. The place looked unreal.

With the finishing touches complete, I decided on a little house warming party. I invited some of my closer associates from Diji, my surfing buddies, and some old friends I hadn't seen since I high-tailed it out of town.

I met Kayla who was bringing ia few art pieces for the walls in person. When she walked in, the caterers were setting up. "Having a party ,huh?"

"Yeah, thought I should."

With a teasing flirty glance, she asked. "Am I getting an invite?"

"Do you want one?" I asked nervously.

"Yes I do. Luke, I would like us to be friends, if that's possible."

"Well, then. Come along. It's starting about seven, Saturday night."

"Can I bring a date?" she asked, and I sensed it was playful, not really serious. "Yep, anybody except douche bag Morse is welcome."

I saw her flinch at my warning. "Cool, I'll see you then," she replied hesitantly.

The party prep went well, and I had everything organised. Caterers, check. Music, check. Toilet paper, check.

Kayla's comment about a date made me think. If she was going to bring somebody, maybe I should invite somebody. There was Cathy from work, who showed a bit of interest. She often flirted with me. In the end, I decided no.

The guests started rolling in, and some brought gifts, the drinks flowed. Laughter and chatter filled the rooms. I got dragged into lots of small groups and pretty much everybody was there, although there was no sign of Kayla. I figured, "Oh well, maybe she decided it would be uncomfortable." There were some of our old group of friends already there, and they were asking about whether Kayla was coming.

It was about eight when I got a pat on the back. "Hey, Luke, sorry we're late." She gave me a big sloppy kiss on the cheek. Stepping back, I took in her beauty. She looked stunning. Dressed casually, but very elegantly, in a flowing summery dress. It was strapless with a low front that showed off her bountiful breasts.

It was only then I picked up on her comment: "We."

I turned from staring admiringly at her to look past her. That's when she said. "You remember Candice, don't you?"

Candice leaned in and gave me an equally sloppy kiss on the other cheek. "Hello, Luke. So nice to see you again. Beautiful house."

"Candice, what are you doing here?" I spluttered.

Kayla giggled. "Candice is my business partner, oh, and my friend."

"No way." I gushed.

"Way, buddy." Candice laughed. "We are besties."

I laughed myself at the irony. "Well... Fuck."

They both laughed. Candice handed me a large gift wrapped box. "This is for you. Happy new house, and welcome to LA."

I took the heavy box, and replied. "Thanks." I lifted it to my head and placed my ear against the box.

Kayla frowned. "What the hell are you doing?"

"Just checking to see if it ticks." I chuckled.

She shook her head with a big smile appearing. "If it ticked, do you think we would be standing here?"

I carried it over to the bench and placed it with the others I received.

I led Candice and Kayla over to the bar and got them a drink. We clinked glasses in a toast.

"Well, am I going to get a guided tour?" Candice asked.

I waved her to follow me and led them both through the house as I showed off the house.

It wasn't until much later, and after quite a few drinks had flowed under the bridge before I got a chance to talk to them both. Feeling a little drunk, I walked outside and sat by the pool, taking the chance to get some fresh air.

Sitting leaned back, resting on my hands, I closed my eyes and sucked in some air. "What are you doing hiding out here?" Kayla asked.

Staring up, I spotted them both standing with a bottle of champagne and three glasses. I gestured for them to sit with me. Candice opened the bottle and poured us all a drink.

"Okay, I can't wait any longer. Put me out of my misery, how did you two become friends?"

Candice took over. "Well, after you ran off and left me. I had to call Rogan and explain. When Kayla found out you bailed on me, she was devastated. Especially when I passed on your comments."

We all took a sip of our drinks, and she continued her narration. "Anyway, when they got back. Rogan asked me to meet them and explain what happened. While we talked, I could see how upset Kayla was. It wasn't hard, she was in hysterics, and I was really scared for her. This was the first time one of our little games had ever failed. Every other time it turned out well, and everybody enjoyed."

I wanted to intervene, but she cut me off. "Luke, I was genuinely concerned and decided she couldn't be left alone. So I went home with her, just to keep her company. I have never felt so guilty in my life. Seeing her world come crashing down, just because Rogan and I didn't read the situation properly affected me, as well. As I say, every other time, it always went great,"

I watched as Kayla wiped away a little tear. "Luke, I felt horrid. I was so scared. I felt like taking a knife and just ending it all. If Candice hadn't been there to hold my hand, I'm not sure I could, or would have survived."

"She was really low, Luke. I'm not trying to guilt you Hon, that's just the way it was. I went back over the next couple of weeks, and the reality dawned on Kayla. She had no money, she couldn't afford to stay in your old place, so she came to stay with me.

While we shared my house, I started to pry, and she told me about her dreams. I had been searching for something to invest in. So, that's what we did. We teamed up."

"Wow, that's a hell of a story. I'm glad you were there for her."

Candice squeezed Kayla's hand, and said, "So an I. We became besties, we get on great. If you take away the fact I destroyed her marriage, we are perfect for each other."