by NaughtyIrishGirl
Hi,
Just wanted to bust your cherry. I think you have a good start going but at this rate you'll be writing 100 chapters to try to tell your story, try writing 2 pages usually 3 pages makes a good chapter and hell have fun with the process,try writing from the end of the chapter this way you know where your stopping and can bring the story to a good stopping point.
I think that this is a really good first story - I'm already looking forward to more! You've made Maggie feel like a really great character and I'm going to be so annoyed if The Enforcer, or one of his mates, doesn't rescue her from her current dire position!
Seriously - liked it a lot and hope you stick at it and let your imagination run riot - mine has!
As always, Duke, thank you very much for all the help and support.
Bokhun, thank you for the feedback. That's just the sort of advice I need. As it’s my first story, I’m bound to make a few mistakes. This on, I actually thought would come to about three pages, while I was writing it. It wasn’t until I was finishing up the next chapter, that I realized that page conversation from MS Word to Lit, is roughly 8 to 1. Chapter 2 should be about 1 ½ pages, but now I know for certain, I’ll make sure to add much more detail, action, and development in the future.
Thank you very much for your encouragement.
You have done a good job with the story and the character but I feel it could have been longer. But I am just being greedy and wanting more. Thank you and don't stop writing.
I've been thinking about doing a similar premise, but focusing on the hero's sides (such as two heroes who are currently an item, or whatever). I'm guessing that most of the heroes mentioned in this setting are "lawyer-friendly" versions of already-existing ones, so the comic geek in me is gonna take a stab at who they are:
* Amazon: Wonder Woman
* Night Devil: Either Daredevil or Nightwing
* The Sparrow: Robin, or maybe Swift from The Authority?
* Hammer: The Wrecker
* The Enforcer: Probably Batman or the Punisher?
Can't wait, but I will with held beath, for the next installment. Thanks.
I got linked here from your tumblr. Very Impressed with your work and all of your posts! Keep it up, I will keep reading!
Greylox