All Comments on 'His First Session'

As a first effort story, it shows promise. The POV of the Domme is expressed well, as are her needs. The character has promise.

My problem is with the action. Given she's a pro Domme, any sexual activity with a client would not only be unprofessional, it would be illegal. Pro Dommes do not offer sexual services, as that would constitute prostitution. Any act of penetration would put her in big trouble with the law.

Second, the intensity of the scene doesn't match an 18 year old having his first session. Leaving marks in general is something that would be negotiated. Drawing blood is a big no-no, due to the health risks and potential liability. Given the intensity of the action, it would have been nice to see the negotiation in the story.

It would also be interesting to see his reaction to the reality of his Internet-fueled fantasies.

Bottom line: I think the Domme is a character worth developing, with her backstory revealing itself in her sessions. But, if you're going to make her a professional, make sure she behaves professionally. And if you want her to be a sadist, well and good, but be sure to make her a human being.

Keep on writing.

Implausible for a domme to be that intense on a first session to an 18 year old. As for the breeding, ridiculous! Better to make it into a D/s relationship story than an interaction with a pro-domme.