Hit'n Those Notes Ch. 04

Opposites attract I thought they looked cute together. I had the same thought about Michelle and Danny. That left Wyatt and I as the 'singles' at the table. Dana didn't hang around and returned to in his group of contestants table. I hadn't seen Tyler yet, but I was looking out for him.

Clinking something against a glass repeatedly hushed those gathered in the room. I could see Karen Cole with a glass of wine in one hand and a butter knife in the other as she stood at her table, surveying those in attendance. Her calling the room to attention prompted those milling around to take their seats, and the room got very quiet.

I recognized a few of the people sitting at her table, but other than Blake and Leza Howell, I was drawing a blank as to their names. Seriously?! How do I even function with virtually no memory facilities for people's names? Grrr...

"Good evening... Welcome contestants, PBS representatives, and Cayman's staff. I would like to thank everyone for pulling together today and making it through arguably a very busy day of coordinating all those elements that will make up an amazing show for the Transgender Day of Visibility Singing Competition... I'm very impressed with everyone's efforts and wanted you to know how much I appreciate your commitment, understanding, patience, and flexibility," she said, raising her glass. "Here's to a great show..."

Everyone raised some form of beverage, and a few expressed their thanks in return.

"I don't have much else to say, other than we would hope you enjoy tonight's dinner and getting to know one another better. Tomorrow the fun begins in earnest," she paused for a few people clapping and hooting. "Contestants will need to report to the theater by 5:00 PM, and the show will start promptly at 7:00 PM. So, enjoy tonight, eat, drink, and Thank you all for being here."

There was more clapping, and then the room reverted back to people talking amongst themselves and got loud again.

I looked at Wyatt, and before I could ask, he asked, "How did it go for you today?"

"I was just about to ask you that," I said with a giggle. "It went okay. The arrangement for my first song took a little work to get ironed out, but it should be fine. How was it for you?"

"Good, I'll have a little accompaniment from the band on my first song -- I'll be playing an acoustic guitar. I'm using the original track for my second." He paused. "If I even make it to the finale... I don't want to get ahead of myself."

"Seriously, we need to make it past the first round of this thing. I'm a little nervous."

"A little, huh? You hide it well," he said, smiling.

If he only knew...

Tuesday, March 27th, 9:38 p.m.

Dinner was really good. Either that or I was starving - probably a combination of the two. Wyatt and I ended up talking pretty much non-stop about some of the commonalities between our two paths - HRT, dysphoria, and the like. It was interesting get his prospective coming at it from the FTM route.

He seemed genuinely interested in my story as well as the grind the MTF route could be. He said he started his transition five years ago at the age of 32. It meant coming out to his wife - he was divorced now and not very amicably, though he didn't divulge much about that.

My story wasn't as complex; I told him when I came out it was to my mom, and there wasn't much drama during that event. I certainly had problems in high school and maybe a little in college, but nothing kept me from continuing my transition. All said and done, it was refreshing to hear his story and to have someone truly understand the gravity and weight of some of the tougher parts of my journey.

Janet added a few stories to our discussion, while Cynthia just smiled a lot and nodded knowingly when any of us spoke about issues making our journeys a pain in the ass. Michelle and Danny were pretty engrossed in one another and didn't really participate at all in our round table discussions. They ended up leaving right after finishing their dinners, opting to skip dessert for what we all jokingly said would be a dessert of their own making. Good for them!

Tyler walked by our table just after we were served dessert. He didn't say anything, but I had caught him looking my way a few times from his table, where he was sitting with Dana. I'm pretty sure he mouthed, "I'm sorry..." once for having told Dana about our meeting earlier.

I rolled my eyes and nodded my head ever so slightly. I was no worse for wear because he hadn't kept that under wraps, but I wasn't going to let him off the hook too easily. I was disappointed that he couldn't keep his mouth shut.

"We're going to go to the casino; you two want to come," Janet asked Wyatt and me.

Wyatt deferred to me to answer first: "I'd like to, but I've got to get some better sleep tonight. I didn't get here until late last night, and it was an early morning... Tomorrow night, rain check?"

I hoped I didn't sound lame, but I needed desperately to recharge my batteries.

"Sure... Tomorrow night we have to meet and greet 'fans' after the show. We'd like to get into the club, but if you don't get there early, you can't get in," Janet replied.

I'd forgotten about the 'Meet the Stars' requirement after each of the shows. Then I remembered the mention of a pool party. Were they going to be one and the same? No, the pool party was on Thursday, the finale day, and started at noon. Augh, I was not looking forward to that event.

"I might be able to get us into the club tomorrow night or Thursday night. No guarantees, but I might have a connection..."

I hoped that would take the focus off of me not wanting to go gamble and my complaining about just wanting to see the backs of my eyelids.

"Oooh, I'm up for that," Wyatt said. "I'm also good for leaving a few coins in the casino with you lovely ladies tonight."

There were smiles all around, and in unison, we all pushed back from the table to go our separate ways. As a group, we made our exit, but before reaching the door to the banquet room, I noticed Tyler trying to catch up to us.

"Brea..." he called out a few feet behind me.

"I'll see you tomorrow; have fun," I told Janet, Cynthia, and Wyatt.

"Oh, you too," Wyatt said quietly with a wolfish grin.

"Nah, I'm going to go to bed," I assured him.

"Mmmugh... Good luck with that," he quipped before following the ladies out into the hallway.

I stood at the door and gave Tyler the 'look', which he had better get and fully understand the weight of the displeasure I was trying to convey. I wasn't going to let him off the hook so easily.

"Look, I'm really sorry about... It just came out, and Dana was all over me for details about what happened. I told him not to say anything. Look, I apologize. I blew it. I get it. It was a dick move. Can I make it up to you somehow," he asked.

I looked over toward the table Dana was sitting at; he was talking to someone I didn't recognize.

"You wanna make it up to me? Go back in there and say, 'I'm a dick and I screwed up'."

Tyler stared at me for a moment. "Are you kidding," he asked.

"You asked how you could make it up to me; well, that's how. You know how embarrassing that was for me? How about how scared I was? Then to have your brother come over and play with me in front of everyone about being married... Go tell everyone at your table you were a dick and see how that feels," I said, looking toward the twenty or so people still in the banquet room who would likely hear his proclamation. "Oh, and don't bother telling them why--you don't need the story so it spreads around anymore."

Tyler was still trying to gauge my resolve, and I wasn't giving him any hints as to the cards I was holding - I had my best poker face on, barely.

"Okay, I deserve this," he said, turning to go back into the banquet room to take his medicine.

I let him take a step before grabbing his arm. "I'm kidding... But, seriously, you spilling your guts to Dana about our meeting kind of hurt my feelings and it was really embarrassing."

He looked surprised that I had stopped him. "I'm really sorry, Breanna... It was an accident, stupid... Are you sure you don't want me to proclaim I was an ass?"

"You mean 'dick', and yeah, I can forgive you eventually," I said, smiling.

"You've got a bit of an evil streak in you... You had me going there for a second."

"Yeah, well, next time I won't be so nice."

"There won't be a next time, I promise. Are you going to catch up with your group?"

"No, I need to go to bed. I'm wiped."

Tyler had a questioning look on his face. "Come on, it's early still; one drink - I owe you that. What do you say?"

"As good as that sounds and as much as you DO owe me, I just can't. Rain check?"

"Tomorrow night then, you, me, I'm buying," he said, all smiles. "Can I walk you to your room?"

"I guess," I said, all dramatic. We both chuckled and made our way towards the lobby.

Tuesday, March 27th, 9:53 p.m.

The walk to my room was full of laughs and an embarrassing story about Dana as a child. Tyler told me to use it, but there was no way I was going to bring it up. A story about a jock strap as a mask was gross, and there was no easy way to bring that kind of thing up in a general conversation anyway. Nah, I think I'll keep that story to myself, thank you very much!

In the elevator, it was obvious why the story about the jock strap had come up - Tyler had had a few drinks this evening. I hadn't smelled much alcohol on him in the banquet room, but in the close quarters of the elevator, he'd definitely smelled like he'd had a few stiff drinks in him. He was kind of cute, inebriated, a little more relaxed, and certainly chatty - the funny kind of mildly drunk chatty.

Of course he was kind of cute in general; there's no denying that. To say I didn't have a few wicked thoughts about seeing just how fit that body was would be a lie.

When we exited the elevator and made our way down the hall, I was prepared to playfully jump down his throat if he said anything as we passed by Dana's room. Fortunately, he was talking about their older sister, who was a doctor in LA; I'm pretty sure he said she was an orthopedic surgeon. The way he talked about her, I was certain he was proud of the fact she'd done so well for herself.

I learned that Dana was a guidance counselor at a high school in a suburb of Chicago. And he mentioned that he worked for an industrial paint company in Chicago. He loved his job, hated the winters, and wasn't a fan of the city's murder rate. Before that portion of the conversation got too heavy - the murder rate - we were at my door.

"Well, this is me," I fished my room's key card out of my clutch and unlocked my door, pushing it open slightly.

"Yeah," he said, as if he were deep in thought about something.

"Are you okay," I asked.

"Yeah, yeah... I," he stopped speaking abruptly.

"You want me to deposit you in Dana's room," I asked, thinking maybe he needed a bed as much as I did.

"No, I'm good... I just... I want to kiss you."

Huh?! It's not like I hadn't had similar thoughts a few times today and on the way up here, but talk about being shocked and not sure I heard him correctly. I was momentarily frozen, speechless, and not really sure how to answer or what I should say. Could I even answer that quest...

I watched him take a step towards me, and everything began moving as if in slow motion. One of his hands moved to my waist, the other brushing past my cheek gently and gripping the back of my neck with authority, and then his lips were on mine...

OMG! OMG!

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I'm trying to grow as a storyteller; I'm far from perfect, so any help is much appreciated. Thanks for reading...

Rachel M. Moore