Home for Horny Monsters Ch. 079

The golden flecks in her eyes sparkled as she shook the box up and down. He could sense her magic now, hovering around her like a perfume. Not sure what sort of spell she was using to see inside a box, he put his middle finger beneath his thumb to summon a tiny spark, then flicked it in front of her face where it sparkled like a tiny firecracker. Distracted, her magic disappeared and she nearly dropped the gift in surprise.

"No cheating," he told her.

"How did you know that wouldn't hit me?" she asked, her tone suddenly serious.

"Because you have my full attention," he responded. The air in the room suddenly felt hotter than usual. "I mean, uh, I'm not distracted. I'm in control. That's what I mean."

Beth bit her lip for a moment, as if contemplating his answer. It almost looked like those gold flecks of hers were moving. "What if I said I wanted it to?"

"I'm gonna check in on me sister," Suly announced. "I can sense her out front. Maybe sit with her awhile and watch the flurries fall." With that, he left through the front door, letting in a cold blast of air that ruffled Beth's hair.

"Let's go find Tink." Kisa grabbed Death by the hand and pulled him out of his seat.

"But I wish to stay by the fire," Death protested.

"I'll let you open a present early."

"Then my hand shall not be stayed!" Death slammed the rest of his tea and stood, the tinsel garland around his neck shimmering in the firelight. He practically dragged Kisa out of the room as her stockinged feet slid on the smooth wooden floor.

Mike couldn't help but notice that everyone had vacated the room, and felt his pulse quicken. Beth sat across from him, her eyes glittering with liquid gold. Magic had changed her in so many ways , and he wondered how many of them were similar to his own. If there was anything Beth had been good at, it was exuding confidence. It was a trait he felt lacking in himself, and though the attraction had always been there, it was kind of a relief that she was making the first move.

"You...do know what would happen if it did, right?"

Beth smirked, leaning in close. "Oh, I'm aware. If not for the geas, the whole neighborhood would be aware."

"I..." He chuckled, amazed at how awkward he felt. "I have to admit something, first."

"Oh?"

"I've always thought you were pretty. Even before, well, all of this." He gestured around him, referring to not only the house, but everything that had happened. "When we first met, I was kind of a nervous mess around you. Maybe that carried forward, I don't know."

"You don't say." Beth arched an eyebrow.

He laughed. "Yeah, I'm sorry about that. It's just, for me, I always worried that I might be crossing a line. I'm aware of my effect on people, and I never wanted to take advantage of that, especially not with you. But you're different now, so maybe it wouldn't be an issue, but..."

"You sure do talk a lot for a man who's about to get laid." She moved toward him and he put a hand up to stop her.

"Lily, I swear to god, if that's you, I'm going to be so pissed," he whispered. Beth had never been this direct, and the succubus had mocked him endlessly over his inability to move on his attraction to Beth. On numerous occasions, she had even offered to turn into the beautiful lawyer during sex, but he had always declined.

Beth pushed his hand away. "I've had a lot of time to think about the things I want. And I've decided that one of them is you, and I'm tired of waiting for it. If I need to throw a shout-out to Jesus or God while I'm riding you to make this happen, then so be it."

Mike's mouth went dry at the realization that this was the real deal. Lily was well known for her dislike of the divine to the point that she abhorred even the mention of God.

"Why now?" he asked, his voice barely audible.

"I always felt like you were so far ahead of me," she replied in a whisper. "But now, I've finally caught up."

She leaned forward into him, her lips pressing into his. The magic inside him swelled up and washed over both of them, hissing as streamers formed along his skin. He closed his eyes and allowed the magic to carry him away, savoring the soft touch of her lips.

Beth held perfectly still. He tried to part her lips with his tongue, but was puzzled when she held them firmly together. Opening his eyes, he saw that her own eyes were closed, but she was frozen in place.

"Um..." He backed away, wondering what went wrong, then noticed that Beth still hadn't moved. Her lips were frozen in mid-pucker, with a slight gap in the middle. "Beth? Are you okay?"

Worried that his magic had done something weird, he stood and backed away. The temperature in the air dropped, and a low rumbling sound filled the air. It became louder, making the whole house shake.

"Hey!" He fell backward into his chair, but Beth remained motionless, as if glued to the floor. The ornaments on the tree didn't even sway as Mike fought to regain his footing.

The fireplace groaned, as if about to burst from the heat. The bricks of the hearth glowed from within as if superheated, and the flames changed colors and shot sparks into the living room.

"Tink! Kisa! Someone!" He tried to move toward Beth to pull her to safety, but when he grabbed her by the wrist, he couldn't budge her. The world tilted sideways and he fell away from the hearth as the flames in the fireplace exploded in intensity. A loud scream filled the air as a massive object shot out from the flames, barely missing Beth and destroying the living room table along the way. It slid through the room and slammed into the doorway of the office, cracking the plaster around the frame.

Mike rose to his feet, the air crackling around him as he summoned his magic. Something had just violently invaded his home, and he wasn't about to let it start trouble.

The object was red, with gold and silver runners on the side. It was far too massive to have fit through the fireplace, and he grabbed the poker from the fireplace and used the hook end to grab the runner and pull on it.

"Mike Radley, what is going on?" Death stood on the second floor, his hands clasped around Tink's ankles. The goblin tried to kick him, but paused when she saw the object blocking the office. Her skirt had fallen down to reveal her ass and bare pussy. If not for her tail, her dress would be over her face.

"Get ready for a fight," he told them as he yanked on the runner. The wooden object creaked as it tipped over, revealing an ornate sleigh covered in silver bells that emitted no sound when it struck the ground. In the back of the sleigh was a giant red bag tied shut with a golden rope.

A tiny figure stood, her red hat knocked sideways. Long blonde braids hung behind pointy ears, and her hair and shoulders were covered in snow. She tried to stand, but fell over the front of the sleigh and landed hard on her butt. Her red dress was rimmed with white velvet, and she wore candy-cane tights above curly-toed shoes. Shaking her head, she squinted up the stairs.

"Tinker?" Her high-pitched voice was filled with both recognition and hope. Her bright green eyes flitted to the dark figure holding the goblin, then back to Tink, her pupils widening as she gasped. The pale skin of her cheek looked as if it had been brushed with golden glitter, and she raised a gloved hand to her mouth. "Oh my Santa."

Her eyelids fluttered as she fainted, her head thunking against the sled and knocking off her hat. She went limp on the floor, her splayed out limbs making her look like a large doll.

"Tink? You know this person?" Mike looked up the stairs. Kisa had appeared from the hallway, her mouth agape as she gazed at the scene.

"Tink don't know," she replied, still upside down. "Maybe familiar? Can't remember."

The stench of sulfur filled the air, and a pair of hands wrapped protectively around him from behind.

"Romeo, something's wrong, I..." Lily went silent, and he turned to look at her. She was glaring at the scene before them, her lip twitching. Different emotions crossed her face, but chief among them was puzzlement. "What the hell is this?"

"You know as much as we do," he told her, waving his hand at the sleigh. The whole scene was unbelievable, but maybe he should have expected it. If Bigfoot, the fae, and the Jersey Devil were all real, then why not one of Santa's elves?

Death dropped Tink on the ground with a thud and put both hands on his cheekbones while doing a little dance.

"Mike Radley! Do you know what this means?" Death's eyes blazed with unholy fire. "We are going to meet Santa Claus!"

Oh man, oh man, oh man, I wish I could see everyone's faces right now!

That's right, dear readers, Christmas is about to become hornier than ever! There will be plenty of fun and surprises along the way, because this is the story that you won't see on the Hallmark channel!

Thanks again for being one of my readers. Believe it or not, I've been planning this outing for some time, and even though you may think this is just a Christmas tale, it promises to tie another bow on the Radley mythos in ways you definitely won't expect.

Until next time, monster-family. Take care of yourself!

~Annabelle Hawthorne