Hot Saviours

Would Kathrine ever see Julieta and Salvatore again once they left? She struggled with the idea that she hoped she would. She shook off that hope and her desire. As a reaction - a defense - she decided it was for the best that they leave.

Father Francisco stopped by to thank everybody for their commitment, especially Kathrine, as the newcomer in the group. Kathrine liked the recognition. Praise also went to Julieta and Salvatore. The dog barked and licked Lin's face. Julieta stood up, and began preparing to leave.

"Salvatore has been bleeding; his leg is injured" Lin pointed out.

After Julieta and Theresa took a quick look at the dog's paw, Theresa said, "Lin will take you to a veterinarian friend who will surely open for Salvatore in the afternoon. No matter that it is Sunday. Let me send him a message to double check."

"But first you can take a well-deserved shower here," Lin insisted, looking at Julieta.

"No, thanks," Julieta said. "I prefer to get going now. I haven't been home since yesterday, and today is Sunday..."

"The Church is one street away, and the Mass starts in just a little more than one hour," Claire said out of nowhere, then started her morning chores, including cleaning the breakfast table.

Kathrine didn't understand right away why Claire had said that, but it turned out that, once again, she was spot on. Julieta nodded and went to take a shower instead. Kathrine watched with discretion how Julieta removed the wool set, shirts and tights, and left it folded on Kathrine's bed. She heard Lin - who was also watching, though less discreetly than Kathrine - whisper nearly only to herself, "Oh my goodness." Kathrine silently agreed that it was some fine lingerie. Whether that was what Lin was actually commenting on was another matter.

Father Francisco excused himself and went to his private room. 

"Julieta, is it okay if I walk Salvatore for you?" Lin asked. "You will get him back when I drive you to the vet, after church. And don't worry, I will be careful with his leg!" She rushed to fetch the leash without waiting for an answer. 

Kathrine took up her reading again. After the day and night she'd had, she was fine with relaxing the whole Sunday away.

+++ +++

Julieta shuffled over the snow, demotivated. What was wrong with her? She had a dream job teaching music theory at the university, a fiancé her parents were proud of, a dog that she'd trained herself, and she had contributed to saving a life. Still, happiness came only from extensive self-awareness exercises. Otherwise, she felt like a despairing music piece that nobody played anymore.

She acknowledged that it had been nice meeting Kathrine, but she was less comfortable with the fact that it had been so difficult to say goodbye to her. She tried to explain to herself that it had been because of the intense experience they'd shared together: rescuing Paolo and saving his life.

Slowly, she climbed the stone steps, and, dipping her finger in holy water from a holy font, she made the sign of the cross.

The church was small, with a rustic construction. Light came in through small lancet windows. The rest of the illumination was provided by old, half-melted candles, some were on but most off. They left dripped wax marks everywhere. The wooden confessional was simple. It had one curtain open, the other closed. 

Julieta quickly recognized Claire and Theresa sitting in the front row. It was early, and people were still arriving. Julieta felt a little overwhelmed by all her recent thoughts, so she walked into the confessional and closed her curtain.

"In the name of the Father, and of the Son, and of the Holy Spirit. Amen. Bless me father for I have sinned. It has been five weeks since my last confession. I have used vulgar speech and had impure thoughts." Julieta started in her mother tongue without seeing the face of her interlocutor.

"Oh, but vulgar speech can be efficient speech," a gentle, male voice answered. It seemed clear to Julieta that he had learned Italian later in his life. "Have you hurt anyone with your words?"

"No, but..."

"That is good. Good," interrupted the voice, and then it made a short, dramatic pause. "Tell me more about the thoughts that are tormenting you."

"Well, they were impure... improper..."

Silence.

"Well, what do you want me to say?" she asked impatiently. "About two weeks ago, my dog was trying to mate with this other dog, which was a male dog. I mean, both. Well, so, yeah, I know we are not animals, but if a dog can get confused like that, it does not mean that there is something wrong with me... I mean my dog." She decided to keep going - to just spill out everything.

"And I might have seen a dick. I mean he was skiing without underwear, and when I saw it, I stopped watching. True, true. Not many improper thoughts though, I do not know why I am talking about it then."

She knew she was stalling. "I also met this woman, and we were in this sauna, and I saw her wearing little clothing."

"I guess if you accepted going to a sauna, you would expect to find naked people there," the male voice said. His Italian was definitely not native. "Would you have preferred her to be a man wearing little clothing instead?"

What type of counsel was that? Was the priest having fun at her expense? He was probably misunderstanding her intention. "No, it was not like that. I ended up in a sauna by pure chance." Before he could argue that pure chance did not exist or some similar theological point, she rushed to add, "It was part of a rescue operation. The point is that I was there with this woman, and I was looking at her naked skin. I felt like I wanted physical contact with her skin. To touch her..." Despite her earlier intention - to spill everything - she kept the thoughts about wanting to kiss that soft skin to herself.

"Matthew 8:3," the priest intoned, adding a holy elevation to the words, "Jesus stretched out His hand and touched him, saying, I am willing; be cleansed." Then he started talking like he was a good friend sitting next to her at a bar. "I still do not understand, my child. What was your sin again? The impure part was..."

"Please! It was like her skin was porcelain, Father. And slightly wet, with snow crystals smelting on it. And her breasts were soft..."

"So, you did touch!"

"No, no, no, it was not like that. I was lying on my back, against them." She relived the experience in her head. "They were round, big, firm though soft. So, I felt them only by chance. But... It was only my curious nature. And her hair smelled nice too. But there is nothing wrong about that, right? But I did have my hands over her legs. But it was mostly her knees, which are boring. Well, a bit over the thighs, only briefly. That was meant as prank for a third person there. Oh... Please, forgive me, Father."

"Normally I would ask you for an act of penance, but you saved the life of that boy. The act of salvation exceeds any minor sin and afterthought that might be tormenting you. But, be sure there is not something else tormenting you, and remember, God loves you for who you are."

A new silence followed. Julieta needed it. She started feeling relaxed and confident about herself.

Then he added, as a closing remark, "Be sure you know who you are." After another long pause he formally concluded the sacrament. "I absolve you from your sins in the name of the Father, and of the Son, and of the Holy Spirit."

Julieta walked the few steps from the confessional to her spot in a pew, looking down at her feet the whole way. She didn't want to make eye contact with anyone. She spent some minutes digging through her thoughts without cracking the code. Well, that was certainly a different type of confession. Maybe she would keep up with the search and rescue work. But wait... how did he know that the person she rescued was a boy?

She looked ahead when the Mass started. She found that the three people were sitting next to each other in the first row: Claire, Theresa, and Francisco.

+++ +++

Theresa arrived at the Headquarters thinking about the inspirational sermon she'd just listened to at church. It had been about fighting for what was right, fighting for the blessing of one's brothers and sisters. She found Kathrine, sitting and reading a book at the kitchen table. She put the book away as the teapot announced that the water was boiling.

"I think coming to the alps and joining you was a good decision," the blonde woman said. "I feel good about what I accomplished yesterday."

"That is good. Have you decided what to do with the rest of your free time? There are a lot of emergencies here, but they are not happening every day. You should not feel imprisoned here, you know."

Kathrine zoned out, disappearing in some faraway thoughts; then she asked, "Have you been involved in any cases of human slavery?"

Theresa sat at the table and took her cup of tea with both hands, looked at it, and said, "No; I only know what everybody knows that reads the internal bulletins. I read about a lot of volunteer work in Africa, Asia and India fighting against slavery and trafficking, but I have not taken part in it. But we also have cases of modern slavery here in Europe for sure." Theresa was unsure exactly what Kathrine wanted to talk about, or why. She did not push further. 

Kathrine took her cup to her lips, evidently wanting more time before saying anything else.

Theresa continued. "Throughout history, there have been many different ways of owning people. I suppose you might say that not all slaves are made equal by their owners and the various laws and practices that bind them. That is to say, the modern world may make a big show of publicly rejecting certain kinds of slavery, but may still be quite accepting of others."

"My father owned people," Kathrine whispered, "and turned them into whores. He went after people in need. He used favorable conditions to attract them, but drugs to keep them if needed. I met some of the whores as a child. But among the whores, I met two that were no slaves."

Therese felt Kathrine's pain, but could not avoid feeling it was a good sign that she could open up to her so early and easily. 

"I should start with my mother, but I prefer not to. But there was another woman that remained free. I remember her chained at the wall, but she was never imprisoned, if you know what I mean. She was handled just like the others, but in her head, she was no slave. It was more like she really understood her situation and she embraced it. She did not fight; she enjoyed." 

Theresa was not completely sure where Kathrine was heading, but had an idea. 

"Sometimes I feel normal people that live a normal life are more imprisoned than that woman was, even when chained against that wall. Who is the one surrendering? Do you think it was conformism what she did, and the alternative would have been fighting in vain?"

Theresa finished her tea, then said, "I am not sure. I thought you were about to say the opposite. Conformism has more to do with accepting the attitude of the group - of the others. I think this is what normal people do, instead of daring to take responsibility for their decisions and desires. It is an inspirational story, the one you tell me about this woman, and I wish you good luck in your attempts to learn from it." 

Theresa watched in silence how Kathrine finished her cup of tea, stood up, and went to the bedroom. She stopped, standing there, looking at her bed. She took the wool shirt that was folded there and smelled it deeply. She exhaled. She dropped it and ran out, grabbing the cross-country ski boots. Without a car, skiing was the fastest option. The vet was on the outside of the town. 

+++ +++

Lin was sitting next to Julieta in the vet's waiting room. Julieta's hair looked both cosmopolitan and glamourous at the same time. How had she managed that?

"You don't need to wait any further," Julieta insisted for the third time. "We can take a taxi home."

Lin was willing to drive Julieta and Salvatore home... and to the end of the world.

"No way!" Lin said. "Besides, I have nothing else to do right now." Maybe if she looked too eager Julieta might freak out. Better to fake some reluctance. She could do that. She stood up and walked towards a shelf full of toys and accessories. She started looking at different souvenirs for dogs like food bowls, name plates and winter socks.

"I already had everything that Salvatore needs." A wary Julieta said. "I don't want any ugly rubber chicken, please." 

The vet came back with Salvatore, who had a white bandage on his paw. Lin listened to the conversion while sneaking thought the shelfs until she found what she was looking for -- and it even was the perfect color tone. He refused payment; Salvatore was practically a local hero, for the story of the daring rescue had spread quickly around the town.

When Julieta turned around, she met Lin eyes reflecting on a mirror. Julieta seemed surprised. Her eyes were wide open. Lin was trying a collar on herself. She turned around, leash in hand, and smiled.  Had she managed to sow the right thought? What had happened with her reluctance plan?

At that precise moment, Kathrine walked in through the main door. Despite her woolen hat being capped with snow, she looked warm and sweet. She froze a second, like looking at the scene. Perfect... like hitting two birds with one stone!

"We are done," Julieta shared with Kathrine. "Salvatore will be fine."

"Perfect, then I arrived right on time! I will drive you home, Julieta, but Lin, I will drop you off at the Headquarters first." 

It was clear, Lin was being dismissed. The evening would definitely not turn out how Lin expected, but she knew her place. Besides, she had not asked for proper permission for what she had been brewing, yet.

+++ +++

Julieta felt as if a decisive moment had abruptly arrived as Kathrine parked the car in front of her apartment. Julieta did not fully understand what was going on. She once again tried to tell herself that her confusing feelings were due to the intense experience she had shared with the beautiful blonde woman. Julieta acknowledged she had a lot to learn from Kathrine; the newcomer knew how to take control of situations and exercise leadership. She was strong and athletic. She also seemed very knowledgeable, which impressed Julieta, too.

"Okay," Kathrine said, interrupting the awkward silence. "Thank you for these intense two days. It was a pleasure meeting you. I guess your boyfriend has missed you a lot." 

"Yeah... He is not back until tomorrow," Julieta said without much consideration. "But yeah, it was nice meeting you too." She got out of the car and opened the back door so Salvatore could jump out. Julieta waved one last time to Kathrine before entering the building. She put one foot in front of the other, trying to gain momentum so it would be difficult to stop.

A few minutes later she was standing alone, looking out the window into the darkness of the night with a caffe latte in her hand. Music was playing in the background. The rain had washed most of the snow from the city, giving it a darker vibe. She was trying to understand why she felt that emptiness inside. Or was it anxiety? The window went from the floor to the ceiling, with heating coming from the lower edge - one of the many luxuries in the apartment that only a salary like her boyfriend's could afford. Even in the relative darkness, she could see people and cars passing by. Among the parked cars she thought she recognized the car she had been sitting in some minutes ago. An unexpected spike of hope quickly faded. She concluded she was confused, and that Kathrine had surely left several minutes ago.

She moved to the sofa, placed the cup on the coffee table, and gave Salvatore the signal that meant that it was acceptable to jump up onto the sofa with her. The dog's unconditional happiness filled the empty space inside of her.

The doorbell rang shortly, but twice. Was that really the doorbell ringing?

"Hi Julieta, can I come up?" Was that really Kathrine's voice?

Moments later, Julieta was opening the door for Kathrine. Julieta's facial expression must have revealed her surprise, because Kathrine started to explain. 

"Eh... the car, you know, it will not start," she said, smiling with all her teeth "I'm waiting for Lin to call back, so I thought I could wait inside?"

Julieta was practically speechless; she was repeating to herself that this was not happening. An awkward silence lasted something between one second and an eternity. 

Julieta was the host, so it was up to her to say something. She knew she just needed to push the auto-mode button. She avoided thinking too much and asked, "Tea or wine?" knowing her friend did not drink coffee. 

"Beer? No sorry, what am I saying, I need to drive back." Kathrine giggled a bit. 

Julieta waited. 

"Tea would be fine, thanks," she said, and took a seat on the sofa where Salvatore was asking for attention. 

Julieta prepared a cup of tea for her friend and served a glass of wine for herself. Meanwhile, Kathrine asked about the books on the shelf, and she answered. Kathrine then asked about the painting above the sofa, and she answered again. Finally, Kathrine asked about the apartment. 

"It is actually my boyfriend's. I moved in with him one... no, wait... about... two years ago. Oh my God, time goes by quickly." Julieta brought the drinks, ordered Salvatore to retire to his bed and took his place on the sofa. 

"It is really nice," Kathrine said. Then she changed the subject. "How often have you worked with Francisco's group? What do you think about them? Bit weird, right?" 

"They are super weird!" Julieta immediately agreed, trying to hide a smile while sipping at her wine. "I did not dare to say anything, though... you are part of them!"

"Yes," Kathrine said, "but they are nice. I mean nice with me, but also nice in general. And we share this passion for helping others, you know? But I see that I am one of them, but you are not one of us? You work with them. You even worked with them before I arrived. A couple of times before? And you even slept with us last night!" 

"Yeah, but that was on the sofa," Julieta said, "and it was very late." She gazed at the darkness outside of the window. Then, with some courage, and probably a dose of stupidity, she added, "If the car issue is taking too long, you can stay on this sofa." 

"Thank you! That means I can get a beer now?" Kathrine smiled again. 

Julieta suddenly felt very warm. She stood up, went to her room, took off her blouse, and grabbed the T-shirt that was on top of the washed cloth pile. She put it on; it was huge on her. She came back with a beer; it was a dry stout. 

Kathrine accepted the beer, but gave it a judging look. Then she looked at Julieta's T-shirt, giving it the same look. 

Julieta smiled and sitting back said, "My boyfriend's. Both of them." She tried to mimic the same charming type of smile that Kathrine had flashed her. "Salvatore and I have helped in two other operations this year. But it was actually today I met Father Francisco for the first time. Is he a priest?" 

"Sort of, I guess." Kathrine answered without showing much interest on the subject. "I think he is, but is kind of not working like one... I do not really know how it works for Catholics, sorry." She lazily sipped on her beer. 

Julieta lost herself remembering the confessional experience from a few hours ago. 

"What is wrong?" Kathrine asked. 

"I went to the confessional today... and I got the impression that he was there."