by Anonanonymous
I personally feel that you didn't focus on the actual sex long enough. The build up was great. I loved that part but you had two sentences describing the what all the build up was for. You also might want to consider leaving out the 'lol' parts. They distract the reader from the story. Other than that it was an amazing story and I can't wait to read the next one.
I actually found the "lol"s very well placed, the whole tale gives good insight into the woman's personality / way of seeing things. The sex was skipped over a bit, but the rest was top notch.
i like the combination of Dom external behavior with playful and sexy confession of inner wetness and need
why be wicked and hateful to get a guy to do
something any guy would do?
if you loved me...
you could strip me naked anywhere...
i would live completely without clothes...
you could invite your friends over to show them
how completely naked i am
you could show them how my cock is completely naked
and open for all of them to play with
you can be overjoyed my cock is always naked
for you to suck and hold wherever we go
you can show your friends and their moms
how wonderful it is
that my cock is always naked
and i live without any clothing at all
while they suck it and stare at it
and tell me how beautiful it is
as the cum shoots naked in their mouths
in front of everyone....
Liked the lols. Definitely gave the impression a woman wrote this (probably did) and like others I wish it didn’t start so quick or end so quick. I’m asking myself what did I even read. There isn’t much of a plot or story here.
Also, i would love this to happen to me.