All Comments on 'In The Garden of Eden'

Stupid is as stupid does.

Always like your stuff but a couple of perceived plot gaps on my end left a bad taste in my mouth this time. The fact it was a close personal relationship beyond the sex would have driven a stake through their marriage more than the sex, to some extent. However, you never pushed that plot line. The other miss was her not seeing what she did as wrong or even being an affair. You had her as a VP in the story under Ian, so blonde bimbo approach comes up short. 4.4*

This resembles another story, I'm sorry I can't remember the title, where the husband, I believe his name was Victor, whose wife was I think Vanessa, received a package addressed to "V. Last Name," revealing that his wife had had an affair with her late boss. As in this story, it was supposed to "heal" her boss, and also as in this story became a relationship that lasted long after he was "healed." I think that story also had a nude boat trip. The whole idea is so egotistical, that the wife is the ONLY woman in the whole wide world that can do this.

\

"It's not like I took anything away from you if you didn't even know about it." - She took those weeks away from him, she took those extra days on business trips, even those late dinners, away from him.

\

"It was all about snapping him out of his intense funk after his wife died." - Again, so why did it continue once he was out of his "funk?"

\

"Ian was a wonderful man. I believe I helped him. I enjoyed my time with him. It wasn't just about the sex," - That just make it more like an affair!

\

"That love would surely count for something, she had thought, but apparently, she had thought wrong." - Heh, it didn't count for enough to keep her from cheating.

\

"This wasn't about sex. That was just a small part of this whole thing." - That makes it worse! It was also an emotional affair.

\

"She was living alone in an apartment" - Heh, I thought he was going to be living alone in an apartment.

\

I know I'm being redundant here, but even if you could SOMEHOW excuse the initial "healing," there's no way to continue once he was "healed," and CERTAINLY no excuse for the annual trips.

\

@Tx77Tumbleweed. excellent points about why her friends never came to visit or why he never went along.

\

@Tootlight1, we're probably thinking of the same story.

\

@Infosauger, I have a similar though different take: He's so depressed by his wife's affair, maybe his hot PA should give him some healing.

\

@Anonymous Re: Counselling - This is partially an LW construct. SOME states require counseling, some do not.

\

@Anonymous Re: Parcel - Seemed like it to me. Thanks for reminding me of the last name.

Could you not think how to end your story?

Ok, but there was not a satisfying ending. What happened to cal after?

Great story. The cheating bitch was delusional right up to the end, and then some.

Really , loved two men, cheated n her husband ,these justifications just do not add up. Another smart wife using a sick argument to justify her cheating. A favorite story line for some authors.

Daniel needed to file for a legal separation from Molly after Kenny opened up the conversation to him about cheating. Molly needed the hard wake up that cheating is cheating no matter the reason the affair started.

The ending is very abrupt but other than elaborating on the destruction of Molly’s marriage because of her supporting Callie’s affair the only other things to add would be lack of visits from her children and not have any grandchildren.

If the wife is a decent fuck the ex husband should have divorced her and then let her stay around to help him resolve HIS loneliness and sexual needs. Why shouldn't the ex husband get the same or better fucking than her asshole employer? And until he meets a decent woman to replace this stupid whore he has got some pretty experienced pussy on tap. He should treat the whore EXACTLY the same way her dead lover/boss treated her. Frequent monkey sex, some fun outings and trips, maybe an occasional piece jewelry, and periodic gestures reminding her what a decent escort and fuck buddy she is. But nothing more. No future, no retirement.

\

Men age like wine, women age like cheese. When the arrogant guiltless whore is well into her cheese phase the ex cuck kicks her to the curb and finds a woman of substance and virtue to be his remaining life long companion. I hope someone writes that sequel.

Well gee, if she needs something to do she can always get a lawn chair and go sit and look at her boyfriends grave stone and spend some really quality time with him. What an arrogant, stupid cunt.

Who cares if the plot was used before. I thought it was a great story. Woman do stupid things because of their feelings. The other story Alex Love Revelations plot is similar. How many plots are used over and over. Hooked great story keep on writing

Competently handled, but adding nothing new to the genre.

🌟🌟🌟

Once a whore, always a whore ! Even if a dumb one..

Well emotional and sexual cheating together if she her husband so much why become emotionally attached to the prick and his family btw was there kids really his?

It was okay, but not up to your usual standards.

1) the wife didn't suffer enough consequences for a 10 year affair.

2) the ending was too abrupt.

3) there should have been some kind of positive ending for the husband.

Scored this a generous average. She didn't suffer enough and her treacherous conspirators didn't suffer at all. Kenny should have made sure that her company and all of his friends knew exactly what had been done.

His son in law needs to divorce his daughter before they hav3 kids. She's a cheating slut in waiting.

Haha looks like Callie doesn’t get it? Look who’s living in a small apartment by herself. Good story, thanks for writing.

Ah. There's no whore like an old whore.

The territory is familiar, but Hooked always works the field with great mastery. Sadly, that almost always leads to a depressing read…a result of the author’s abilities. Thanks, I think, for an interesting diversion.

Four stars. The non-ending cost you a star.

JPB

Funny though, all the four women supported this idea for Callie to ‘help’ their boss. They all volunteers he to step up and agreed to help cover for her.

Sad that not one of them thought Callie was wrong to cheat on her husband even when it went on for years after he ‘got over’ his grief. Even more off that the other women’s husbands all seemed to know bit not one of the other husbands for it out of order, even being casual friends you would have thought at least one would have found it distasteful her betraying her husband and having their spouse support such behaviour.

Even the daughter supported her mother, at least the son in law reacted as I feel more men would at a wife cheating or a woman assisting and covering for a friend cheating.

She cheated, lied and continued to lie every year up until he died. She even came to think of Kenny as ‘clueless’ and relished her ‘relationship’ with Ian.

When the husband accompanied her to the funeral her friends treated him poorly They all disrespected him and all of them knowing what was happening would have humiliated Kenny no end. He was a joke and Jamie calling him to tell him Callie loved him and was insulting Also given how all the friends talked about him.

Why would he not want divorce? Why would he want to spend retirement years with her because Isn had died?

So she lived alone, her helpful friends all kept their marriages and faced a better future than Callie - she had poor friends who encouraged and enabled her but then separated themselves rather than risk losing their spouse.

An okay story, but it really fell off at the end. I appreciate that you let him keep his balls and go through with the divorce, so not a complete loss.

Why do so many authors make the women out to be so narcissistic, self centered, and stupid? The fact that Callie STILL doesn't get it makes her look like she has the intelligence of a turnip.

ending felt like it was missing something and why not also do the usual DNA check on the kids? Even if the math doesn't line up send her a message!

If there was nothing wrong with her relationship, why didn't Callie tell her husband about all her sexual adventures? Also I would expect Ian to leave Callie something in his will. That would have set off alarm bells. The ending seemed to chop off part of the story. Kenny deserved some indication of a happier future. 4 stars.

Modern slut feminist !

The ending is missing something….. Maybe a revenge aspect (I know that wasn’t the assignment) but it needs something more at the end.

So far yours is the only one I’ve read to score above a three.

Another Great Great Tale from Hooked! 10 Big Blazing Stars about the heartbreak caused by an unrepentant cheating wife, that fell in love with her boss, and had the time of her life pretending to be her Boss's wife part time, until she had to follow her husband out of town, but managed to fly back for a week of lust each year for 10 years. The Ego of this woman Knoww no bounds. She thought it was for the greatr good. Just not good for her husband. What a cheating slut. Thanks for the Great Effort Buster2U

@sbrooks103x - the story to which you refer is "Revelations" by alex_lover, mentioned earlier. Good, bad or mediocre, Hooked took far more than just the basic plot from that story the and it's unconscionable that no credit or acknowledgment was given.

I am with Trustingagain best story of this challenge so far

This author can pace a story and hold your interest. The ending left a little to be desired but overall a good story.

I enjoyed the story until the last page when, suddenly, the story went away. That cost a star. A second chapter might get that star back.

Decent until the last page where the story just....stopped. needed to be far more teased out at the end. Very unsatisfactory way to end the story.

I think this story was told.before and better

Best story in the event by far!!!

Well done. Enjoyed the story. Callie was not only unwilling but in capable of admitting she had cheated on Kenny & their marriage or did anything wrong with her planned, intentional emotional & physical affair with Ian over 10 years!

As far as Callie is concerned she was not only smarter than her husband but she actually hadn't done nothing wrong. In fact, from her point of view her 10 years emotional & sexual relationship with Ian was an act of mercy.

Hard to believe a cheating spouse could actually believe she had done anything wrong...if I had not had a similar, unfortunate experience with my first wife who cheated multiple times without even the thought of wrongdoing or guilt.

I would have acted like all was ok and planned a vacation to a very dangerous place like Bogota Columbia. There i would have found a drug cartel that i could make a quick deal with to take her into the jungle and use her as their community whore until she was burned out. As soon as they grabbed her i would have burned her identity and destroyed her clothes and passport and reported her missing when i got back to the room. Now that bitch can suck all the dick she wants and get it up the ass 10 times a day. Serves her right.

The ending fell off of a cliff. This is a huge weakness on this site. So many authors don't know how ot end a story.

My friends older cousin was a ceo of a huge company. At 33 he started fucking an older (49) married woman with four kids a claimed to have a great family and the best hubby but he fucked her for years. He ducked her every where. In the office, in her car , in outside places , when the travel, on airplane, on boats , in sex clubs in Europe, in her bed and at every company function that her hubby attended. Every Friday she would completely blow him and swallow.. she was under strict orders to kiss hubby before drinking or brushing. He would joke that her ass and pussy were broken in to a mold of his cock and taste of him ass but she maintained she had the greatest hubby ever and loved him

I agree with the others--it was a 5 until the ending.

G

Nothing here that hasn't been done before, and with a better conclusion.

Average

Not any burn for others involved And the slut 's to mild

Expected better

There was another similar story where the guy looked at the mail that came in for his wife, because he thought it was for him, and learned his wife had had an affair for years with the guy who was her boss, who had died. I think he left her money. This was a less elaborate version than that one, and was well told.

Callie was an idiot. In Kenny’s position I’d make certain that the divorce settlement included half of whatever inheritance Ian left her. If no bequeath, then Callie ought to see that Ian wasn’t such a great guy.

Although this is a LIT story, a lot is true. It amazes me how women think and this is a great example, they see it as not hurting anyone, harmless little action and justifiable. Reverse the tables and see what happens. This woman was an idiot from jumpstreet, stupid enough to be led into this by her friends (some friends huh?). NONE of them got hurt in the least, and they and their husbands (who were just as stupid) knew all about it, or enough the should have said something. She deserves everything she got and then some. I'd have gone for the jugular and made her hurt. sorry....this was average at best....

"I never took anything from him. What did it hurt?" she often asked her friends.

-

Never took anything from him?

What about the days or hours she was off fucking her boss instead of spending them with her husband?

What about the minutes or hours she was thinking about her boss instead of thinking about her husband?

What about the respect she has for her husband that she didn't have because she knew she was smarter than him, enabling her to cheat?

What about the closeness she had with her husband which she traded by getting closer to her boss?

Never took anything? Delusional.

I liked the story, The reference between the garden of Eden and the three women she worked with was good. 'Take one for the team', he will never know, well that didn't work out so well.

The store is okay but it's hardly the best story of the LIR TO ME Invitational.

.

Most of this is standard boiler plate LW stuff and even it's not done very well. We have a stupid Martian slut Ray wife TYPE B - Not only does the wife think that her behavior is perfectly justifiable but she doesn't even understand WHY the husband might be upset and she doesn't recognize that her husband is actually a homo sapien that needs to be treated with respect simply as a person walking on the planet Earth.

.

The Story breaks down however because the husband completely misses the SIGNIFICANT portion of the story.

.

Even if you buy the argument that the wife was doing this with her boss in order to save his life and save the company….. her trips back to Phoenix which occurred a few times a year for several years in a row had nothing to do with her bosses depression. Even the wife said that her boss was over it and was much healthier psychologically and emotionally.

.

The husband NEVER confronts or asks the wife about that in any meaningful way. That is the key to the whole story. Because there is no defense from the wife regarding what she did in those years after they moved to North carolina.

Hmmm. This story is suspiciously familiar. From years ago, can't remember the author, but the stories are very similar. 3.5 stars, best I can do.

We know Randi will hold your feet to the fire if you don't write the story her way, but this one would have been best from a man's point of view. You sure were sweet to the cheating wife though. 3 stars.

Him not going after rage rest of them do sit right with me

Dizzy cow.

the jerry and cal phone convo scene was the loudest thing in this story and made it worth reading. that simple phone convo had a whole lot of soul in it, if u were trying or not. ty for the read

Over used theme...a 3

3* for the arrogant stubborn skanky bitch Callie who saw no wrong in what she did!! Callie should have been burned

Whore Callie got off too easy!! He should sue the estate of Ian and his daughter too!

Publicly disgrace the bitch

Would of stayed with her and provided "grief counselling" behind her back for a while, and even tricked her friends or her friends husbands to do the same, then burn the whole thing down.

You could of added a lawsuit for damages against the company and his estate. That would of been fantastic!

Good story. The usual from Hooked1957.

Three pages and a cloud of dust.

Gave you 5⭐️s.

A longer version of this is "Revelations " by alex_lover.

More intense, and detailed.

I'm

*

*

*

*

AMerryman

I had to give this one a “3”, because there was no action against the company, or his estate. I also call bullshit on all of the other husbands and wives being ok with this- It seemed like she was part of their family. People can always be counted on, to do what is in their best interests. I really doubt the other husbands would have allowed the wives, to be in any contact with the cheating slut. And the daughter and her family promoting her dads whore to sainthood, wouldn’t have happened. Sorry, you didn’t set the “ hook” on this one....

I recall reading another LW story with the same plot. I don't recall the name of it, but the only major difference was that the former Boss/Lover left her something in the will.

What kind of counselor let her go before she realized the wrong that she had done?

The husband should have sued the estate, the company and the friends.

People.likw the wife never het it the rwal question to her amd her friends is who is going to comfort thw husband because of their treacherous behavior

I enjoyed this a great deal! Thank you!

-

Be well!

Should have sued! Dd

"It wasn't disrespect. I was helping him past a difficult situation," - That COULD account for the first few weeks, but by then he should have been out of his "funk" and she should have stopped. DEFINITELY shouldn't have continued once she left town.

\

"I was the closest to him, so it seemed to be my responsibility." - Joanie was his personal admin. Why couldn't she have "assisted" him?

\

"because of something that happened 10 years ago" - But it wasn't JUST 10 years ago, it continued annually, apparently until he died. It went on long enough so that his daughter acted like Callie was her step-mother.

Another good story from Hooked, as usual. With another non-ending ending, as usual. Four stars ⭐️ for this one.

The story of a wife who thought her vagina was for nursing.

Callie is both narcissistic and delusional. An interesting combination, but not the type of person I'd want to be around.

It is telling that her friends do not send their spouses/significant others to "comfort" Callie following her divorce. Their failure to do so shows they know their encouragement of the affair was inappropriate and ultimately destructive. They should be nervous. Karma never forgets.

good story in fact vert good story hooked there could be another story here with the other couples when she moves back Callie could go after Joanie or one of the other wives husbands whole lot of new revenge anyway 5 for me

"It took nothing away from you/us..."

This is said so much in these stories and the rebuttal is never as strong as it it would be in real life:

"you took EVERYTHING from me/us. The times you were out with him, you couldn't be with me. You weren't with me. The times you were thinking and fucking and eating and sleeping and everything you did with him, you took that time from me."

Then again, these women seem very entitled.

Just another entitled, narcissistic, cheating cunt! No more,no less!

What a dumb slut. If she was so proud of being a hero with her cunt, why didn't she tell her husband, so he could be too.

Good story but once again I felt you short changed your reader, the wife got exactly what she wanted and was given freedom when she is found out, not even a slap. Where was the emails to all her friends and family, the facebook announcement, the ostracisation and 10 years worth of revenge.

"I never took anything from him. What did it hurt?" I guess you took his wife away from him. He thought he was married to a woman that was honest, devoted to her family, had integrity, respected her vows, husband, family. Possibly he never had that, "Clueless Kenny" indeed. Her actions hurt everyone in the family including herself. Who's clueless? Thanks for a different take on a Loving Wife.

Great story. The only issue I see is the couriered letter. With cell phones and email she would have been notified by one of the friends. Still, I like the story, and others like it. The fact that she never understood that what she did affected their marriage, showed that she only cares for herself and what she wants.

Pretty ordinary cut and paste job from any number of this author’s previous stories.

None so blind as those who won’t see.

It gave her the ability to feel noble slutting.

it took nothing away. Well, except when she was with him. How can this argument persist? You slept with someone, which prevented you from being available to me, emotionally, sexually, spiritually, in every way. You can't be with someone else and be with your husband at the same time. It took, at the very least, the exclusivity you promised to me.

Good story, Shit ending.

How nobody could get her to see how wrong she was isn’t believable. The counselor could get her to see it. The simple question is, would she be ok if he “helped someone” like that? We didn’t see Kenny laugh when she said “you’ll be alone in apartment”. He should have told

Her he’d be out dating and then we saw him dating. That may make her understand how bad she fucked up

"He used to live for the weeks you would come home." - Home? Home is in Charlotte.

\

Funny how in both stories, this one and "Revelations," the executive that was SO vital to the company that a married woman had to cheat with him to "save" the company, that the company somehow managed to survive their deaths.

\

"He was so needy. He needed someone. He needed me. And I was there for him." - I know this has been said, but he still "needed" her after she moved?

\

"just because of something that happened 10 years ago" - It wasn't just 10 years ago, if it was, maybe, MAYBE he could have gotten over it, but it's been going on for the past 10 years.

Fucking stupid bitch!

Since Ian was so well known in the home office area, and she moved back there, I would've expended significant dollars on an expose revealing the affair in great detail. Screw his gentleman reputation and advertise her deceit and slutful ways! Im sure a local reporter would like to get the viewership that such an expose would cause.

Well done, as always.

G

I took nothing away from you. There is a response to that in another story on this site. The husband tells his wife of opportunity cost. Every time she spent with the other man, was time she didn't spend thinking of or doing something for their love.

She takes what she could have given to him, and gave to someone else.

Why not go after her employer or the deceased employer for alienation of affection? It might not have gone anywhere but would certainly caused a good deal of embarrassment!! MC had all he needed to BTB!!

To much delay in acting. No counseling or blabbering back and forth. You immediately divorce the fucking slut.

Great as written. Needs no elaboration. Five stars shining.

Great story. Self deception is insidious. Callie is a stupid bitch who obviously read the Cheater’s Handbook, and took it to heart. She got what she deserved…loneliness. Five stars ⭐️ for this one.

Callie was simply surreal in her delusions. The year affair is bonkers and a marriage killer. The pilgrimage once a year to Phoenix was just sluthood and over the top weird.

Great story, Hooked, leaving a feeling as empty as the place where their original partner should have been next to Callie and next to Kenny. She screwed (literally) up badly and refused to see it for what it was. I would hope that Kenny would be able to move on and find happiness again, but Callie appears destined to be forever in denial and sadness. Five stars and thanks for writing and participating in the event.

Took waaay too long and nowhere near enough pain for the whore wife or the Dead lover's family.

ended kind of blah. The friends needed to speak up etc for her to get the point. Still doesn't have to agree with them but nothing was really said.

amazing thought process

What a deluded, self centered, idiot slut she is. How would she feel if her husband did such a thing with the same motivations.

Rubbish ending, I guess you just got bored or ran out of tropes to spew.

It's very unlikely that an intelligent woman that wants to remain married would be so belligerent and unwavering in her defence of her actions. Like many of these LW stories it seems like it was written with the specific purpose of telling an untruth, and most likely was the rewriting of a tale where the wife was actually leaving the husband for her lover, as such a defence for her actions would seem far more reasonable for the circumstances.

I suspect that many of these LW writers have been cheated on multiple times by partners that just wanted to get away from them.

No divorcée will ever feel as at home with their married friends as she did prior to divorcing. Especially if she is charming, good looking and exciting. Let's also be honest, she's spent 10 years away from these people, so hardly embedded in their lives. However, once she gets a partner, and as a good looking woman, she will sooner rather than later, everything will settle down as she will cease to be a 'threat' imagined or otherwise.

What surprises me most about this is the acceptance and compliance of all the husband's in allowing their wives to facilitate this long term affair.

Perhaps the cuck should have focused more on the friends husband's faith in their own wives fidelity rather than trying to turn the female friends against his ex.

5 Stars on a good Story . Why didn't they send him to a Brothel in Nevada . When my wife and I broke up I visited a couple of them . At least i knew ahead of time how much it would cost Me ,