All Comments on 'Ines at the Bookstore'

The change from third to second person is extremely jarring in this. I for one can never get into second person stories anyway, especially when the person being spoken to is female or trans (being neither of those, it's hard for me to identify). Regardless, changing your communication method midstream is very difficult to pull off and I don't think it works here. Some good ideas (I really liked the part before the switch) but after that it feels clunky. And some of the word choice usage makes me twitch a little (it's not a man pussy when you're dealing with a transgirl) but that's more preference so take that for what you will.