Is She Smiling at Me? Pt. 14

This story is the fourteenth installment of the "Is She Smiling at Me?" series. As always, this story is a work of fiction. Any resemblance to real people is purely coincidental. I love hearing feedback from my readers; please feel free to leave comments or contact me with your thoughts or suggestions.

Can't get enough of Alex and Liz? Check out the story that led them to this one in my prequel series "She Smiled at Her."

*****

"The groom would like to see you."

It was the day of Josh and Rachel's wedding. Alex, Liz, and I had been exploring the castle-like venue, admiring the brilliant architecture, the expanse of oak timbers, and the scale and grandeur of the stonework. We were wandering around the quad —a scopious outdoor space featuring gardens between the stonework, large bronze sculptures, and a centered flagstone aisle— when one of Josh's cousins tracked me down at his behest. Josh came from a big family, and tradition had mercifully precluded me from being bestowed with the responsibilities of best man, which was more than fine with me. I was happy just to be there for my friend, and to support him in whatever non-official capacity was required of me.

"Well, ladies, duty calls." I smiled at the girls, kissing each of them on the cheek before being led away by the cousin.

We made our way through the labyrinthine corridors of the massive building, under the vaulted ceilings, past the ornate, leaded glass windows, and up an oak staircase until we came to a dressing room across the hall from the impressive chamber where the ceremony was to take place. I thanked the cousin before I knocked on the heavy wooden door, waiting to be beckoned inside.

"Come in!" I heard my friend's voice from within.

"How are you doing, man?" I asked as I entered, closing the door behind me, "Not getting cold feet are you?"

"Fuck no," Josh chuckled as he leaned forward over the countertop, adjusting his tie in the mirror, "I've never been more sure of anything in my life."

"Good. I'd hate to have to hobble you on your wedding day." I joked.

"No, no hobbling necessary." He smirked.

"So, what do you need?"

"Actually, I wanted to give you something." Josh stepped away from the counter and went to his suit jacket hanging on the wall. Reaching into the breast pocket, he produced a black velvet ring box and slipped it into my hand.

"Buddy," I said with a chuckle, "I'm hardly an expert, but I'm pretty sure it's the best man's job to hold onto the ring."

"That's not Rachel's ring. Take a look." Josh replied with a mischievous grin.

I raised an eyebrow quizzically as I searched my friend's face for an explanation, but it quickly occurred to me that the answer to my question was to be found inside the little black box. Prying open the lid, I drew a sharp breath at what I found inside. Glimmering brilliantly with the reflected light of the room, two rings rested side-by-side in the slotted velvet base of the container, each unique in its features yet both equally beautiful —much like the girls for whom they were obviously intended.

The first was a white gold band, set with a lustrous pink stone flanked by two smaller diamonds, giving the impression of a delicate flower. Twisted into an s-curve and partially embedded with tiny, sparkling gems, the shank featured a rose gold vine detail wound the opposite way, carved into a leaf motif near the central stone. If it was possible to capture the essence of a person in a piece of jewelry, Josh had pulled it off with this ring so clearly designed for Liz.

Befitting its intended owner, Alex's counterpart was elegant and mysteriously alluring with three glistening stones —two smaller gems on either side of a larger, central one— each the deepest, darkest black I had ever seen. Intricate engraving decorated the sides of the white gold shank while diminutive diamonds adorned the front face, their fiery, multi-hued sparkle a radiant contrast to the dark stones that they bracketed.

"Liz's was easy. I had the idea and I just ran with it. But I wrestled with Alex's for a while before I settled on a design that felt like it fit. What do you think?" Josh asked.

"First of all," I began slowly, unable to tear my eyes away from the gorgeous rings, "You, my friend, are truly an artist..."

"Aw, shucks." He chuckled.

"But second and perhaps more importantly; Josh, what the fuck?!"

"Look man," He replied with a laugh, "I'm tired of trying to nudge you towards something I already know you want. You love those girls more than you've ever loved anything, but you want to be stubborn and obtuse? Fine. Marry them, don't marry them, I don't care. I'm giving you those rings so I can say I've done all I can do."

"Dude..." Dumbfounded, I tried to collect my thoughts into a coherent pattern but I came up short, "You have to let me pay for these..."

"Let's call them an early wedding present. But that only makes sense if there's going to be a wedding. If not..." One corner of Josh's mouth curled into a crooked grin, "I'll be sending you a bill."

"You can't just extort someone into getting married," I responded with a wry smile.

"Won't know until I try." He shrugged.

"God, you're an asshole."

"You love me."

"Begrudgingly." I quipped, looking down at the rings one last time before I snapped the lid shut and embraced my friend in a big hug. "Thank you, man. I'm so touched... I don't even know what to say."

"Just say, 'will you marry me?'" He grinned.

"That seems weird, but okay... Will you-"

"Not to me, you fuckin' goof!" Josh cut me off.

I laughed at that.

"Now go find the girls, I have to finish getting ready."

"Josh... Why today of all days? I mean my relationship is the last thing you should be thinking about today."

He shrugged as he turned back to the mirror, fussing with his hair distractedly, "No particular reason. I guess it just felt apropos, you know?"

As I stepped out into the hallway, I felt somewhat unbalanced by what had just transpired. I took a deep breath and wandered over to a window overlooking the quad, gazing out at the impressive space. At the far end of the yard, I spotted Alex and Liz holding hands as they meandered around a garden. Even from this distance, one could see the depth of their connection and their love in how they touched and looked at each other. My sense of unease melted away and my heart filled with love as I looked down at them. Josh was right; I did want this for us. I had been repeating the same mistake I made when I'd first begun my relationship with the girls, trying to deny my feelings for fear of what they might mean for the future. With that realization, I smiled as I turned to make my way back to the quad.

******

"At this time I'd like to request that all the single ladies join the bride on the dance floor for the bouquet toss, please! Single ladies to the dance floor!" The emcee's electronically amplified voice boomed over the speakers.

Liz practically lept from her seat, grabbing Alex by the hand and pulling at her excitedly, "Oh! Let's go, baby!"

"You go ahead, sweetie, I'm going to stay here and keep Matt company, okay?" Alex smiled.

The beautiful brunette pouted for a moment before she bent to give Alex a quick kiss, flashed us a happy smile, and turned to make her way toward the crowd of young women gathering at the edge of the dance floor.

It had been a beautiful ceremony. Like all weddings, the blushing bride had been the talk of the town, and while every word uttered about how beautiful and happy she looked was certainly true, I felt as though I was the only person in attendance whose focus was primarily on Josh. In all the years we had been friends, never could I have imagined seeing him as happy as I saw him on this day. Lofty words like gaiety and exuberance somehow still seemed to fall short of adequate descriptors of the state he was in, and it filled me with joy to witness it. Afterward, the girls teased me about getting misty toward the end of the ceremony, but of course, they didn't have the whole picture. My reaction had been, at least in part, on account of being able to visualize myself in my friend's shoes with them at my side.

Now, well into the reception, with dinner behind us and the rest of the night ahead to unwind and have fun, I sat at our table next to Alex watching amusedly as Rachel prepared to throw her bouquet over her shoulder and into the wings of fate.

"Ladies, take your place behind the bride and be prepared to jump high. Fortune favors the brave! At the count of three, the bride will throw her bouquet. Ladies and gentlemen, let's all count together. Are you ready Ladies? One, Two Three!"

The bundle of flowers sailed high over the dance floor, describing a steep arc as it decelerated, its energy bleeding off rapidly against the resistance of the air. By the time the bouquet reached apogee, hovering in that frozen, timeless moment of equipoise where momentum and gravity canceled each other out, its trajectory was obvious. I watched its descent, floating down in slow motion as it found its way through the sea of outstretched arms and landed gracefully in Liz's dainty hands.

"Of course that just happened," I muttered under my breath as the hall erupted into a chorus of cheers.

Glancing around the room, I caught sight of Josh looking back at me with an odd look on his face; in Germany, they called it schadenfreude but the far less eloquent English expression was a 'shit-eating grin.' I couldn't help but smile as I shook my head in disbelief, watching him return the gesture with an exaggerated shrug before breaking out into subdued laughter. Lifting my hand to my face, I mimed the motion of scratching myself under my eye with a single, choice finger.

"What was that?" Alex asked abruptly.

"What was what?"

"That look!"

"What look?"

"Baby, I saw that exchange between you and Josh just now."

"I don't know what you're talking about."

Alex stared hard at me for a long moment. I could feel her eyes boring into me as she searched for clues until the unmistakable look of sudden realization spread across her gorgeous, freckled face.

"Oh, my god." She murmured, clearly taken aback.

"Fuck." I muttered.

"You want to get married?!"

"Babe, that's a hell of a leap to make based on a look." I knew that I wasn't talking my way out of this, but I wasn't prepared to deal with the subject either.

"Matt, you think Josh doesn't talk to Rachel? She's been asking questions lately, about us, about our plans... I had my suspicions, but I didn't really believe it until just now when I saw that look."

The full weight of my sudden shift in circumstances came down on me and I let out a long, exasperated sigh. Looking across the room nervously, my mind grappled with the problem of how to proceed from here. The question of how Alex would react to the notion of marriage had been the major crux of my hesitation up to this point, and I couldn't quite get a read on what was going through her head at that moment. She seemed somewhat stunned, as though she were still processing the information, yet not entirely put off.

"Alex, this is not how this was supposed to go down." I finally spoke, finding myself unable to meet her eyes.

"Well, you know what they say about best-laid plans." She laughed softly.

"Tell me about it."

"Matt..." Her elegant, alabaster hand slipped into mine and squeezed it affectionately.

When I looked up at her, she was smiling warmly at me, her brilliant emerald eyes beaming adoration as she uttered the single sweetest word I had ever heard; "Yes."

My heart skipped a beat. Did I just hear what I thought I heard? Was this really happening? Here? Now?

"Yes... What?" My voice nearly caught in my throat.

"My answer is yes."

"I haven't asked you anything yet."

"Okay, so ask me."

"So much for surprise and romance," I replied with a wry smile.

"Stop dodging, baby. Ask me." She pushed on with an amused grin.

"I caught the bouquet!" Liz had made her way back to the table with her prize in hand and an impossibly wide smile on her face.

My eyes flashed back to Alex, trying to convey a silent plea to not out my intentions to Liz just yet. The message was received; she gave me a smile and a subtle nod before turning her attention back to Liz.

"I saw, sweetie!" Alex returned the younger woman's enthusiasm.

"You know what that means!" Liz giggled, shaking the bundle of flowers at us.

Alex and I exchanged awkward smiles and there was a brief, tense moment when no one said anything.

"Jeez, lighten up you two, it's just a joke." Liz reached for Alex's hand, "Dance with me?"

"Baby, I just talked Matt into a dance, would you mind if we went first?"

"Sure! But then I get to dance with both of you." She grinned happily.

"Wouldn't have it any other way, beautiful." I smiled

Alex gave Liz a quick kiss before she took my hand and led me away from the table toward the crowded dance floor. She turned her back to me, pressing herself against my chest as she started moving to the music.

"Thank you," I spoke softly into her ear.

"Of course."

"I gotta say, I'm kind of stunned here, baby. For starters, I thought you'd be a harder sell than this."

"Right?!" She laughed, "I would have thought so too, but as soon as I realized what you were up to... I don't know, it just felt right. Granted, it's not somewhere I ever saw myself, but Matt... You're the only man I've ever loved, and that means a hell of a lot. Being with you and Liz has been better than I could have ever dreamed of. I'm all in, you know that. So if marriage is what that means to you... Well, then there isn't a doubt in my mind."

"You know it could never be legal."

"I do. But I also know you. I know you've got it all figured out already. You've probably had it figured out for months."

I laughed at that. For what had felt like an eternity, I had been agonizing over the details, my fears of how Alex might react, and whether I should forget about marriage and just leave well enough alone. But now, confronted with the reality of it, my doubts and uncertainties drained away, replaced with a sense of calm clarity as I held my gorgeous girlfriend close, swaying to the music while we pivoted in a slow circle. She was correct; it did feel right. All this time, I had been foolish to doubt myself —to doubt us. Glancing over at our table I saw Liz staring back at me, her chin resting on the palm of her hand, watching us with a dreamy smile on her pretty face.

"Do you think Liz wants this?" I asked.

Secondary to my concerns about how Alex might feel about marriage, another doubt that would occasionally creep into my mind in my private moments of reflection was whether or not there was an ethical consideration in asking Liz to marry me. Not only was she so much younger than I was, but it seemed almost immoral to try to tie down someone so fundamentally innocent and free-spirited. The problem was purely intellectual; in reality, I never felt our age difference, except maybe in the most superficial of ways, and our love for each other was so deep and absolute that I knew in my heart it was beyond reproach.

"Are you serious? Baby, you're about to make her the happiest girl in the world." Alex's words reassured me more than she could ever possibly know.

"We," I corrected her with a smile.

"We, what?"

"We are about to make her the happiest girl in the world. Now that you're in on it, you have to help me. And it has to be tonight. We can't sit on something this big."

"Oh, I don't know, you're pretty good at sitting on big ones." She giggled.

I affected a dramatic gasp at the rare Alex innuendo.

"Boom." She chuckled, her tone light and happy.

"God, I love you."

"Matt..." She said my name with a sing-songy tune as she turned around to face me, placing her arms around my shoulders, "You still haven't asked me yet."

I looked deep into her eyes as they stared back at me, sparkling with an inner light as though her very soul were smiling at me, filling me with strength and confidence. I had never felt more sure of anything in my life than I did at the moment.

"Marry me?" I whispered.

"Yes!" She nodded emphatically, her beautiful eyes made all the more alluring by the moisture that accumulated above her waterline.

An overwhelming sense of euphoria washed over me as I took the back of Alex's head in my hand and pulled her into me. I was only vaguely aware of the song winding down as our lips met and we shared a slow, intense kiss while the world around us faded into obscurity until all that existed was myself and my wife-to-be. It felt surreal to have all my fears and worries dissolve into oblivion as what had once seemed like an unlikely dream became my reality, all in the span of a few short minutes.

When our lips parted, a part of me was almost surprised to find myself back on the dance floor surrounded by the other guests. Alex giggled softly, touching her forehead to mine as the song faded out. It almost seemed impossible that I had done something to make this incredible goddess as happy as she appeared then, her warmth and joy a palpable aura that infused every fiber of my being with bliss. She had never looked as beautiful as she did right then at that moment, quite literally taking my breath away as she smiled at me and slipped her hand into mine, leading us back toward our table.

"That was some dance!" Liz exclaimed when we neared, her big brown eyes twinkling happily.

'You have no idea.' I thought as I smiled back at her.

I wanted to propose right then and there, get it out in the open, and share my happiness with both of the women I loved. Pretending as though nothing significant had just transpired was the most dishonest thing I had ever had to do, but it was also necessary. It was fitting that the engagement between Alex and me had happened the way it did; just a direct and honest declaration of our love and commitment to each other. In retrospect, I wouldn't have had it any other way. But Liz... Liz deserved the surprise and romance.

"Mm-hmm. Now it's your turn, sweetie," Alex smiled brightly at the young woman, offering her hand.

Liz giggled, smiling brilliantly as she reached for Alex's hand. While my fiancée pulled my girlfriend toward the dance floor, I sank into my seat with a contented sigh. I knew with certainty that I didn't need to communicate those ideas to Alex; she would feel the same, and she would help me give Liz the proposal that she deserved. As if to confirm the thought, Alex looked over her shoulder, flashing a wink at me as she led Liz away. I watched the girls dance, holding each other close as they moved gracefully around the crowded space until my friend's voice pulled my attention back to the table.

"I think the universe is trying to tell you something, my friend," Josh said as he slid into the chair next to me.

"Yeah, well, message received." I replied casually, taking a sip of my drink for dramatic effect, "I'm engaged."

Josh began to react, but I held up a hand to stop him mid-exclamation.

"Shh! I'm engaged to Alex, Liz doesn't know yet."

"Wait... How does that work?" He asked, a puzzled look on his face.

"It turns out your wife has been asking the girls some pretty pointed questions lately. You need to have a talk with her about opsec, by the way. Alex put two and two together when she saw the look you gave me after Liz caught the bouquet. I was kind of backed into a corner."

"My wife..." Josh repeated with a goofy smile.

I couldn't help but laugh at seeing my friend so happy.

"So when are you going to ask Liz?" Josh asked when he snapped out of his reverie.

"It's gotta be tonight, it's killing me that Alex and I have this thing between us and Liz isn't in on it yet."