James's Descent Ch. 04

But Anna could tell he was lying. This man was horrible at it. The story was captivating, but he had the guilt show on his face. He did not like lying. He knew the words were not true and was not so callous as to shake that off. Why was he hiding the truth?

"Quite the story, James. But... you are a terrible liar."

Deep sigh. The man was that indeed. He hated doing this. His stomach pained him from doing it... mostly because he was practically tortured when caught doing it before.

"Yes. Can I at least ask you not pursue it further? You do need to put that focus in, but... let's not go further."

"Why not? I'd rather know what my daughter is getting involved with. And it sounds like you might make a terrible man for her if you have to come like this."

"Anna, just... do me this favor. If you can tell I can lie, you can also tell I do mean it that Pam will have nothing to worry from me... other than me not being able to become a permanent fixture."

But he wanted to become one... and had no idea how.

The woman scrutinized him. A few facts came back to her. What made sense? She didn't call for him before... no, she called for... something else. It was plausible that her call for the outsider would bring someone with their belief. And yet... she did not introduce herself. He was letting on details that he couldn't know.

Unless...

She had to be certain. A small test.

"You know, she had a baby since you last came here. With her brother."

"Oh! Well... I hope she might still want me around."

There. A small lowered eyebrow of calling her out. He didn't just know she had a baby... which did not surprise him. He feigned surprise. He knew it was with him... Probably even what her name was... spying? No, the other option made sense, which would justify the other. She could play around with him some more, but this man was easy to read. A terrible poker face. She needed only to ask the question... Anna hoped to see another reaction.

"Are you the outsider?"

"What? No!"

It was not another reaction. That fear again. Fear of getting caught. He tried to brush it off, but she could see it. And her thoughts came crumbling. THE OUTSIDER.

Anna looked at the man. A bit shorter than her, those eyes that seemed so focused. Angry, but somehow caring. Was this really him? Her face filled with astonishment.

"You are." That came out with reverence.

"I told you I am not. I'm just a guy."

Lie and... truth. Still... she was tempted to kneel. This was... this man was responsible for all this. She should be thankful in a thousand ways. The cat was out of the bag... Anna began to lower herself, intending to kneel, even if the rough stone was going to be unpleasant. The reaction even to her bowing her head and bending one leg... was unexpected.

"No! Do not fucking do that! If I gave you anything it's a fucking order to stand up to everyone, including me, so don't you fucking kneel! Now, stand the fuck up, Anna!"

She froze in place. Before, she was the one controlling the conversation. Now she felt put in her place, reminded of what facts there are. And... with her own religion thrown at her. Yes, the outsider said to stand up to everyone... even him. No kneeling. Anna straightened up and felt like a child. She looked at the man with such reverence in her eyes.

"Okay, see... THIS is why I didn't want you to pursue it. Because you're gonna go around revering and such and I just wanted to have a nice visit, fuck Pam possibly a couple times... and not have all of you kneeling to cooperatively suck my dick."

Anna felt like she did do something wrong. But she did not feel that anger of his being directed at her. No, she did... what she was told. She questioned... and got here. And he knew it. Why he was not upset at her. And.... he didn't want reverence? Any other leader, god, whatever she knew with even a modicum of power wanted others to kneel to them. Which, ironically... would increase her reverence of him.

"Come on, say something... you're making me feel awkward. Also, don't go ahead and tell the others. I wanted to avoid this."

"You wanted to come here and just... be another person. I am sorry, I should not..."

"Hold up... you're still doing the reverence thing. Down with the formalities. I'm just a guy. Stop treating me like I'm president."

"But... you are... more."

"Damn, I almost want to go back to you making me uncomfortable with the calling out. Come on, take a breath. And can we go somewhere else? Freezing out here."

Anna was having a hard time understanding how to treat this situation. But she was adjusting. Remember that the outsider asks you to stand up to him... and seems to be very relaxed. No, that was the point. He wanted her to... treat him like nothing more. Deep breath. A smile.

"It's still... quite a lot to meet you. And I will still say... thank you for bringing us here."

"You did most of it yourself, though... yeah, a lot of it is me."

"We might not have a private conversation inside. It echoes."

"Right. We might need more than just another room. AH. Butcher room. We've got one extra room between us and the hall."

"You know it as if you had built it yourself."

"This base is the result of several iterations of perfecting it. Wait until it's even halfway done. But... freezing."

A nod. The woman wanted to open the door for him and had her hand slapped away. It was like she was being corrected by a parent. She could not help but fawn over him. In a non-romantic way. He was giving directions, but those directions did not have the intention of enriching him... but them. He was doing all this for them.

They might have had an uneventful walk to the room behind the kitchen... if Pam hadn't stepped out of the room she was working on with an idea to feed her girl. Just a glance towards him and her eyes grew wide, a joyous squee came out before James was practically rushed into an embrace. Anna could see that she loved him just as much. A step back to observe. And to understand that it did have a charm to have her think no more of him than what she knew.

Pam wrapped her arms so tightly around the guy like she was taking shelter from a storm.... Then pulled back and started shaking him.

"Where did you disappear to?!"

"Hiding away on other worlds from psychic pursuers until your mother could provide some cover to get back here."

Oh, so he was trying to spin that story again? She saw a bit more confidence this time, but still easy to note for the mother. But she'd play along for now.

"I missed you! You got me pregnant and I had a girl and... she has your eyes!"

How to deal maximum emotional damage. It was like his knees went weak. James wanted to see that little girl now. Would Pam be a great escape from her mother? Best deal with that and then spend the rest of the day with her.

"Your mother... told me. I... do want to see her. And spend time together. Just give me a bit to have this conversation with her."

"Talk later! I'm taking the day off just to use this all. Oooh, we can do so much fun stuff together!"

"If only it were not so cold outside. But, just give me one hour with her and then you've got me for about eight..."

"Ugh. And that's how long you can stay?" She made a sound like a child. "No. You can talk later."

James gave a sigh and thought about how he could appease the beast for now. And a simple idea came. His arms were wrapped around her form... a form that got a bit more curvy since last time. Now he took a much more hungry grip as the man drew her into a long kiss, gently pushing the girl against the wall.

This worked. Pam felt her knees weaken. So much in that kiss that made it all better. Not just for her, but she felt like he was doing better with her around. He could hold her like this as much as he wanted. Anna watched that long kiss while smiling wide. It was fun. Pam had no idea... and this made it more special. No, he did know better... her daughter might treat him differently if she knew... and he didn't want adoration. But he wanted this.

It lasted over two minutes, time after which Pam had a glazed look on her face. She'd fuck him right here and have another child if he asked her. But the outsider stepped back and looked at her with that smile she started to love.

"Just one hour. That should weigh you over until then. We're gonna be talking about my future with you... so don't think I'm doing something naughty."

Future. Marriage? Right, her mom had to approve. A lot of her wanted to just keep him to herself for the entire time... but she could give them this. A nod. One hour.

"Good girl. Don't worry, I'm eager to spend some time together as well. But gotta get business out of the way to do fun."

She gave a small laugh. Yeah, they did. Pam would let him go, but dropped a small reminder.

"I'll keep you to that."

Now they could resume the journey to the other side of the base. Pam thought that they would stop in the same room she'd go to... the dining room. Instead, they kept going. Now, why were they going so out of their way to talk? Something she wasn't supposed to hear?

The girl's lips puckered in curiosity. The outsider did say to question things. Maybe not barge in on the conversation... but she could listen in. She saw them going into the kitchen. It was going to be unpleasant, but she could listen in from the freezer.

And she was not the only one to see this interaction. Nathan had almost jumped from hearing his sister's screech, stepping just outside the workshop to see her making out with the guy by the time he made it there. But that did not interest him. When he looked at Anna... he saw.... A look like those she gave only him. A look like that man was the most important she could imagine. This was not just because Pam was stricken with him... it persisted even as they walked away without the girl.

A knot formed in his stomach as he thought of the worst. Jealousy whispered to him. Was his mother being a whore who would go for anyone... or was that man some serial woman bedder that just wanted to get on with them and leave? He was barely here when Pam had Fiona... so far, the James guy qualified as a deadbeat dad... and might further drop into stealing his woman. He was tempted to follow them... Pam went into the dining room and those two went into the kitchen. Listening in on the door would have him hear another door closing. Why were they being so secretive? He couldn't go further... they'd hear the door and he had no excuse to be in there. But he would not let him go.

*

"Alright, you have questions... so let's have them. I won't lie, I won't hold back stuff, but just saying that the truth might be a bit uncomfortable."

There was not a lot in this room, lit by a single ceiling lamp. Anna would want him to get the only chair, but the man just leaned on the butcher table while pulling out a smoke to light. It was a bit overwhelming for her, to have such an opportunity.

"You said you are... just a guy. But for us, you are a god. Why's that? You're not lying about that. Are you doing those things we found as signs of the outsider before?"

"Just a guy. And yes, I am also doing that. But reality is a bit uncomfortable... even for me."

She felt terror in him. Fear that he was fighting back. Just a man? He was not waving around powers beyond humanity. She had more power than him at the moment.

"Then, what is the reality?"

A deep sigh from the man.

"This is a game. No, not metaphorically, literally. I'm just an average guy playing a game on a computer and you all are just parts of it. This colony, the whole time you were here. A quite popular game. But it's never done this before or we'd fucking know. It's not supposed to have... real people inside it. But it's been doing things that it's not supposed to. For you, I might as well be a god because I direct you on how to do everything, and I can use the dev console to make stuff happen that you didn't do yourself. And I guess I worded the religion to name me as the god. But I'm just another guy out of billions."

A game. She knew the concept. And he was right... the truth was uncomfortable. Just little things to direct in this simulation that might be to some as inconsequential as things. To imagine that for him it was all just... pieces on a board. Yes, someone might be shaken when those pieces start being alive. But... others might be uncaring, others would throw lives away with no concern, perhaps even being overjoyed that they can now use up lives instead of some disposable equipment... destroy something more valuable. And she saw that he was scared... and still concerned. Still caring.

"That... is a lot to take in. And this is.... Not usual for where you come from."

"Nope. Not usual at all. This... doesn't happen. This is not like the world is running on my PC. That thing couldn't do that. We'd need like an entire server farm just to run one AI to approach human comprehension. And there's three of you here... plus the visitors... and raiders."

"Those are part of the game." A lot made sense now.

"Yeah, more of a check so you're not getting on too easy. And the random events. Much better with this storyteller. The other two would probably have murdered you already."

"Storyteller?"

"Yeah, it introduces things that I don't have control over. Well, I can deal with them with the dev console, but the point is that you guys do it. Though, we're supposed to have a lot more people by now so I've been helping out with the raiders."

"Why some of them just fell from wounds we did not cause."

It was him. And everything made sense. Or started to. Anna found it a privilege to know how the world works, even if it was like this. To them, it was still reality, life... everything. She put another question. The man held nothing back.

"We're supposed to have more people? And we don't because we won't take in other people from the outside, like visitors or such?"

"Yeah... uh..." He was looking awkward. Ashamed. "I kinda imposed on myself the desire to have you guys grow just by making kids. Not the intended way, technically you couldn't even have kids until that DLC launched earlier this year. And yeah, you were supposed to recruit prisoners, get wanders to join, get them as rewards for doing tasks..."

"And that desire came to us as well... because we didn't want to involve others."

"I was actually thinking to give up on it because you guys have a harder time for it. Feels unfair."

"We still haven't had any new recruits. You thought of it... but didn't do it?"

"Well... I actually wanted to know what you might think of it. Like... push away that desire that came from me and... would you want others in? Others you could bring around to your ideology, convince to stay... so on."

He was not demanding, but asking. He wanted their opinion and respected it. Such novelty. Their leaders before might have discarded their thoughts as lesser, and unimportant, but he was giving them the chance to weigh in. And he'd listen. But to her, his desire was also important.

"Why did you want us to grow only through... well, the more traditional way?"

"Because I'd enjoy the thought of having one big incestuous family in here."

Not even denying that he was a pervert. To bring others... that might simply be strangers with their own story to bring around to their way... it did seem the more efficient way. But to have everyone here their actual family... difficult indeed...

Anna considered him and his intent. Was it just the perversion? No, it felt like his intentions were different. Yes, he was a pervert, but behind those ideas lay some almost noble intentions. Maybe it would be better if they had some like-minded people around. But she had gained a closeness to her family like never before. And for him... she could take the difficult road.

"Then let us continue with this. And have your big, incestuous family." A smirk. "Does it excite you? Or is it something else?"

"It does excite me a deal. Not like I'm getting much from the game. You guys look like these barely detailed blobs from up there. So I'm not getting porn when I look down."

"And here I thought you would be watching us eagerly."

"Oh, I do, but it's more... the idea. Of this happy family that is also fucking, not having to depend on others for that thing that is just so damn hard to get these days."

Hard to get? Did he do this because... he had no options where he was? Anna had thought mostly of herself, but now she was thinking of him. Pam said he was in pain. That could add to it. She had not even asked of his world.

"What is your world like? Are you... alright there?"

"Modern, no fantastical things. And hell. Taken over by powerful people who would delete people without concern. Because someone might get in the way of their comfort, because they wanted something and they could spend those people like they're subway tokens. It's hell. Am I alright? I guess I could be worse. I could be fucking better!" A pause. He looked down. "No, I'm not alright. Nothing is alright and there's nothing anyone can do about it. If we'd try to fight back, they'll just kill us with impunity and use that to make things even worse until we're in fucking nineteen eighty-four."

Anna understood what her daughter meant. Her heart broke a little. This man was in such a bad way and... no, she COULD do something. They could make this place better, make it a place where he could escape from that world. Even for a time... a short time to give him respite. She almost felt shame to not greet him with every comfort he would want. Not because he asked for it, but because he needed it... deserved it. She needed to stop that thought from forming into something he would disagree with. They would make him comfortable, let him escape here.

"Then... all I can say is that this world does not deserve you and that you are welcome here any time. I will gladly take on this burden to give you a break."

No disapproval. He was considering it. Looking around. Planning. But the comfort he might imagine was not for him alone, it was for everyone. This was a god. He deserved that title.

"Got a lot of work until it's gonna be better, but... if we can do this again... yeah, I'd like it. I mean, I can at least have sex here. No damn chances back where I'm from."

"They don't deserve you, then. And we'll try to give a bit more. Caught us with not much to offer. We'll do better next time." A small tease. "And no tomatoes."

That made the man grin.

"I also hate pickles, and too fatty food, onions if they're not done well, lamb, mutton..."

"Quite the picky eater. We had to take what we got."

"You'd be one too if your choices were eat this food whatever it tastes like or get violence. Kinda start hating the things associated with it."

A pause from her. This man just... kept showing that even this life was privileged. She was at times stern with her children, she knew that some engaged in corporal punishment... but it sounded like James had it dealt for every last thing that his parents might disapprove of... to the point it was a usual, expected thing. That was practically abuse. How was he... like this?

"All I can hear is you suffering pain... how can you think of others when you need so much?"

"Because I don't want anyone to go through that pain. Unless they might really earn it. I didn't, even if others might think I did. Maybe we should stop talking about my life."

The man had gone through five cigarettes by now. He was clearly under some stress, possibly always. Anna might have a lot more questions for him. Maybe it was best to let him go.

"I think you need some time with Pam. I'd have thought for her... but now I hope she makes you feel better. And you are welcome any time. Just say the word... and I will call you back. I assume... you will go once I..."