Jetsam

.:.

"Graham, have you got a minute?"

"Yes, Ms Marshall?"

"I wanted to let you be the first to know. I handed in my resignation this morning and I'll be taking gardening leave."

He blinked, stunned. "What... how..."

"Honestly... it's been a long time coming but the crash made me realise that I disliked my life here in London, so I'll be moving down south. I need some time for myself. To get my head right."

"Wow. That's a big change, if you don't mind me saying."

"It's fine. I appreciate it. Your directness is one of the things I've always loved about you," I told him with a smile. "I'm not sure what will happen to this team medium-term but I imagine they'll get one of the seniors to stand in for me. Probably James. So you'll likely change to dotted line in to him. I'll find out this afternoon and then there'll be a handover process of sorts. Not like we need much, you'll be able to help whoever gets the role with the day to day; you've been great at that."

"Thank you, Ms Marshall. It makes sense. But I can't say that I'm... happy about this. I've enjoyed working for you. I hope you're happy, though?"

"I am," I said. "And I will be. By the way, this is unofficial, but a little bird told me you'll be getting a promotion too. So congratulations."

"Oh... oh wow, thank you. Thank you so much!", he said, stunned. "Um. I didn't expect that at all. Thank you!"

"You're brilliant at what you do. I'm going to miss you, but you're going to be just fine."

He flushed crimson and shuffled his feet.

"How long will your handover be?"

"One week here, three remotely, though I'll still be available after that for anything desperate that comes up. Unless, of course, if I'm sitting on the beach or sorting out my garden," I added.

"Oh?"

"I'm being selfish," I told him, with a grin.

He laughed softly. "It's long past time that you did that. I'm really glad to hear you'll be taking some time to look out for yourself. So what are you going to do, if you don't mind me asking?"

"No idea, yet. I'll look for something small and low stress and run with that for a year or two to see how it suits me. And in the meantime," I said, grinning widely at him as I triggered the trap, "I'll be spending lots of time with my girlfriend."

I was extremely gratified that he did, in fact, squeal like a sixteen-year-old girl.

.:.

I'd dropped the keys at the building concierge for the estate agent to collect, then taken the lift down to the basement carpark for probably the final time. I'd already packed the clothing and bedding that I wanted to keep; the rest had gone to charity collection points in the evenings following work. I'd divested myself of all my unnecessary baggage of my lost years, junking mementos and once-personal items that no longer held any meaning to me.

And each item so discarded had lightened me.

Now it was time to make a new beginning.

I knew Ashleigh was expecting me that afternoon, so I'd decided to leave early in the morning, not telling her my plan.

I wanted to surprise her.

If I was exceptionally lucky I might catch her still in bed. I grinned.

And then, with fierce joy filling me, I left Barnes for what felt like it would be the last time and worked my way out of London and into the wide southwest. It took nearly no time to leave my old life behind, and the miles between my future and me counted swiftly down.

I listened to a mixed selection of my favourite power ballads, singing along badly more often than not, feeling young, alive, and above all... free.

It was a riotous pink and orange dawn with high fleecy clouds - beautiful and heavenly and perfect.

I idled the car quietly into our lane, trying to maintain my cover. Smelly Car was parked where it usually was, but I could see no lights on inside.

So she was either asleep, or more likely, down by the water's edge. I poked my head inside and confirmed that she wasn't home, then I locked the car and set out to where I knew she'd be.

It didn't take me long to cover the mile; ten minutes or less. I paused at the top of the bluffs and stared down at the water, to where she was standing, knee deep in the gentle waves.

I smiled. She was copying what I'd done those scant few weeks ago; staring out at the ocean while thoughts chased themselves around her head.

I made my way quickly and carefully down from the bluffs and to our rock. I sat down on it beside her neatly-abandoned shoes, and rested my chin on my knee as I watched my love in the slowly building sunlight.

Soon I saw her move. She turned, and slowly made her way out of the water, head bent forward, staring at the sand on her feet through the veil of her hair

She'd taken a few steps up the beach before she looked up and saw me.

I slid off the rock and held out my hand.

Wordlessly she ran to me; she caught me and I felt her mould herself to me as I wrapped my arms around her.

She was shivering; and I stood up on my toes to kiss her cheeks.

"Oh, god, I've missed you so much. Are you home for good?" she whispered.

"Yes."

She pulled free and took my hands in hers. "I don't have anything to feed you for breakfast," she said, staring at her feet, almost ashamed. "You weren't supposed to be here until lunch. I thought I still had time."

"I wanted to surprise you. Time is precious. I couldn't bear to be away an hour longer than I needed to. There's nothing keeping me there any more. My life is here. My heart is here, with you."

"Forever?"

"I love you," I told her, a spontaneous and unplanned confession, and I stared up at her as she froze for a second as if she didn't quite believe what I'd said. "And I'm already yours forever," I added, just to make sure she'd clearly got the message.

She took a ragged breath and clung to me. "You know I'm going to hold you to that," she whispered, when she at last could.

She was still gaunt, and broken, but I could see the faintest flush of colour in her cheeks again.

A spark. The beginning of something new for us.

And I pulled myself to her, held myself against her, smiling as she crushed me to herself and buried her face in my unwashed and dishevelled hair.

Then she pulled on her discarded shoes, took my hand, and led me home.