All Comments on 'Jill's Eighteenth Birthday Ch. 01'

I actually really liked this story! Can't wait for more seriously. Short but really good.

I liked it alot..Lot's of things could happen..keep this one going!!!

Please continue. I liked that it wasn't like a porn film and that it seemed like something that might have really happened without being embelished with a play by play description. Maybe sisters should get involved??

the holiday isn't over so he needs to fuck his cousin again maybe both sisters also

If things go well parts two and three should be up in the next couple days.

Fuck I love your writing!

I wouldn't rave about it but I've read worse. Detail is good for setting up the physical situations but over detail in none neccessary stuff can be boring like: "When I still lived at home I had at some point made one of those rooms into a bedroom for myself, and that was usually where I still slept when I was over."

I mean really? Where the hell else would you sleep except in the bedroom? and this was only one example of many that could be trimmed to make it have more impact and flow better.

I disagree a bit with photoman001. I just found the sentence awkward, not unnecessary. First, it laid the foundation that there was a bedroom. Also, since he had moved out, it was possible that the room was turned into something else. It explains why he thought of going there for privacy.

Usually these stories hold an element of 7th grade mentality. This was actually believable, especially with his sisters.

Thanks!

Well done mate!

- almost. The story line is a very old and very tired cliche. Sometimes the girls bring condoms to the party - which would be reasonable. Or the guy carries them as a matter of course

The one cliche which was avoided (IIRC - I'm not going to go back and reread this thing) was locating the hymen several inches deep in the vagina

But come on, dude, this is the girl's first time! Even if she's so comfortable with her girl cousins (which is possible), or a budding exhibitionist, she needs and deserves a more romantic, meaningful loving! Fully undressed, hours of foreplay, going down on her, it's all about her, right? She might want a rematch, but once she finds a guy who enjoys making love, it won't be with this cousin!

I won't vote because I don't think it deserves five stars, and I don't want to bring your score down.

Gary

She's18,he's 20ish, so to the last posters comments... No way there is going to be 'hours of foreplay and romance'. He could have at LEAST gone down on her though, that was pretty lame! ...and foreplay I get, but hours? Hell you dont see girls giving guys hours of foreplay, why should it be expected anyway? Enough to be enjoyable for both and get everybody worked up and get to the next part of the fun! Kissing, touching and talking are the foreplay, oral sex is making damned sure she gets as much, if not more, enjoyment out of this as I do, then on to the seXin' ;). ...and if she can cum while thats happening then even better!

Hours of foreplay?! Lol. I did think he was going to lick it though! ...but really, for the most part thats not on the top of the brain list for kids that age anyway. Hell, its just since the advent of general internet access for everyone that most guys would attempt something like that on their own without being asked and then having her give him driving directions. It either wasn't thought of, didn't know about it or afraid to try and get it totally wrong.

...now what annoys me is all the damned stories where the guy cums and fucking rolls right off. What the fuck is up with that? Ive never really understood that. I like to stay in for a while. Only time I want off fairly quickly is if ive been going at it hard for like forty minutes and Im totally out of breath, like ive been running, and my body is overheated and I know Ill be nauseous if I dont.

...oh, and the whole cousin thing... You know I never really got any immoral/unethical bs type of feelings when wanting to fuck my cousins... My only concern thinking about it was, what if we get caught? ...never had a sister, but honestly it probably wouldnt be much more of a dilemma, and I think its really that way for most guys, contrary to all the stories. Heres the real reasoning thought process, assuming it was her idea;

1. Are we gonna get caught? How can we make sure we dont?

2. I do NOT want to knock her up! Do I have condoms?

3. (Probably an afterthought) you're not gonna act strange after this with me, right?

4. How often can we do this? Since were family its not like were cheating if we keep doing it after we start dating someone, right?

Tada. Guys mind cleared up. Ok, I guess there are guys that the idea would totally floor them, I just prolly havent met too many of them, heh.

It kinda irritated me that he couldn't even bother to take their clothes off and really enjoy it!

His older sister s a nutter! Lol. I bet she's a closet serial killer ;). He's still gonna fuck her though, heh. Can't wait to fuck lil' sister though!, :)

It was fun, but not as good as it would have been had a strong emotional connection between Jill and her cousin been established. Have I ever just fucked a girl strictly for sex? Once or twice by HER choice. I'm definitely different from most guys I guess. I much prefer making love over fucking. For me personally, sex without the emotional connection is extremely unfulfilling and unsatisfying. Any one night stand that I had wasn't by my choice. 4/5

(10/6/2021) Nicely done; short but sweet. Glad there are more chapters. 5 stars from me.