Johnnie Ch. 01

Johnnie 01

"Hi, Patrick."

"Hey, Johnnie, um, I suppose you're at the mall for the same reason that I am, right? What a mess on our street, jeez. Wait, don't you have water pressure on your end of the street?"

"Oh, I do, but the workers told everyone on my side of the street to keep an eye on the color of the water, so I guess that means the water main break mostly effects your side of the street for now, I guess. Also, what's a water main break, Patrick?"

"Oh, the big fat feed pipe that leads to all the smaller pipes to the houses broke open, but they are not uncommon so the city worker guys should have it fixed before night fall, I hope. I also hope that no one falls into that big fat hole they are digging, so. Anyways, what's new with you then, Johnnie?"

"Um, I just came to the mall to get away from the noise and the eye stares from the city worker guys. Besides, I'm probably going to 5-Points tonight, so a new shirt or hoodie never hurts, but listen, Patrick, since you brought it up, I mean, you didn't hear this from me, but your friend William, I mean, he could basically have his way with my friend, Josey Jaye, so?"

"Well, I don't remember bringing Billy up in the last 6 seconds, but do you mean your friend Josh then, Johnnie?"

"Well, Josh is always in his submissive Josey Jaye mode on the weekends and it is the belief of Josey Jaye and myself that your friend William gets a big fat cock for Josey Jaye and who would blame your friend William with the way that my friend Josey Jaye struts and highlights the power of a pair of fishnets that starts with the gentle covering of the feet and then weave their way up over his perfectly sized thighs just before they seductively disappear under his Denim skirt, so?"

"LOL, now I get it, I said big and fat twice, but ewe, why would you put that image in my head then, Johnnie? Also, I hope you're not suggesting that I pass along the description that you just gave to Billy because none of things you just said are words that usually come out of my extremely masculine mouth, so?"

"Alright, I get that, Patrick, but I'm just saying, you and your friend William hang out at several places, so what's the harm of stopping by 5-Points once in a while then? I promise to not get involved with those two and I'll keep you entertained while they, you know, discuss things, so?"

"Is that a lie then, Johnnie?"

"Well, it might be a little white lie, Patrick, but I'd put my money on the fact that your friend William will get involved all by himself because he gets a big fat cock every time he catches a glimpse of Josey Jaye, only he needs a little incentive to stand up and be a man and snag some sex from someone who wants to sex him back. But I actually and really promise to not embarrass you, no lie, Patrick, so?"

"Ugh, I mean, ugh, I mean, maybe if we're out cruising or something, but I'm holding you to that "not embarrassing me" part, Johnnie, and I mean it, so."

"Promise and in my mind, I just sealed that promise with a medium kiss. So?"

"Ugh, Johnnie, what?"

"Well, as your neighborhood Water Main Break Boyfriend for the day, I mean, won't you buy me a sticky bun then, hmm?"

"OMG, Johnnie, stop with the boyfriend and kissing talk and roll those eye balls back where they belong! But I will buy you a sticky bun, but you have to stop talking about that too because just talking about sticky buns from the mall makes me big and fat, so. And how do you have this body if you're on the sticky buns then?"

"LOL, I'm not "on the sticky buns" Patrick, unless you want to walk me backwards into the food court restroom and make my buns sticky with your big fat water main after we seal the "no embarrassment" clause with a real medium level lip smooch, so? Also, LOL, it's just harmless sexual flirting and you won't die, Patrick."

"Kill me now, just kill me now, ugh, come on, Johnnie and we'll get your buns all sticky, I mean, get you a sticky bun, jeez."

I mean, folks, when you a dresser who is still trying to find their way and their comfort zone, I mean, keeping them dazed and confused is the best way to go, LOL, so far anyways and by anyways I mean like twice now, maybe three times, but no more.

Anyways, hi there, folks, first, I'm Johnnie (Johnny) and second, say "hi" back on my Chang page, but remember what I just said about still finding my way through life on the other sidewalk. Um, I'm not afraid to go out dressed and have come to prefer it, but that damn day job, right? It's just better that I cross over to my original sidewalk Monday through Thursday, so try to be a little understanding about that. I mean, I have enough faggot issues whenever I go out, so piling it on at work just doesn't make good business sense, right?

Um, what else, right? LOL, no matter who you are, I'm probably shorter than you are and even though my hair is also finding its way, it will be grown out how I want it soon enough. Oh, and the streaks you may catch me wearing from time to time, well, they're extensions, you know, because of that damn day job thing, but I have several if you wish to make a color choice when we go out because I mean, you're going to ask me out, right?

Well, to help you with that, I mean, I think I have just enough of the softer features to draw you to me, but I'm not all that in the sex department. I'm not exactly squeaky clean, even though my fem voice is quite squeaky, but I'm not afraid to explore and experience and participate, when that time comes, which, who knows, might be the time when you ask me out, right? I mean, we don't know yet.

And lastly, I'm not overly outgoing, but I have fun hanging out at the mall and at 5-Points, which is a weird corner in Middleton with five streets converging into one dangerous intersection that has a traffic signal that confuses everyone so there are fender benders all the time, which makes hanging out just off in the empty lot so much fun. I mean, whoever is not hanging out at 5-Points still have a high probability of stopping by, LOL, by accident, so.

Also, I still have a few friends, like my fem boy CD friend Josey Jaye, who wants to be the boyfriend and the girlfriend for Patrick's friend William. Which as you just read, I promised to stay out of, other than to bring it up, which is another thing I'm not afraid to do. Huh, LOL, now that I think of things, I may not be afraid of the things that are to come to my life, LOL, but I might be afraid to see Josey Jaye in action.

Anyways, back to my dazed and confused neighbor, Patrick, who should still be thinking about if he is going to take me up on my offer to seal our "no embarrassment" deal with a medium level kiss. Oh, and by the way, ewe, gross, it's only a stupid rumor that I taught myself how to deep tongue kiss by using the inner part of a Flesh-Light sex toy as my practice dummy lips! I mean, ewe, gross, right?

"Kerri, Kerri, Kerri, two extra caramel sauce cups, two please! OMG, Suzie, you're going to smash my sticky bun!"

"(And I thought I had a little pussy.) Fine (dweeb), will there be anything else, sir? And good luck with all this, even though he's exceptionally sweet most of the time when he's not fem boy sissy sassing with his mouth, so????"

"Um, no, Miss, I think one handful of all this is enough for the day, so thanks."

"(Get Kerri's number, fool)."

"Oh, I mean, well, so?"

"LOL, sassy mouth Johnnie can put my phone in your phone, but don't call me until next weekend, I mean, we just met and I have weekend plans, so?"

I mean, that little episode with Kerri at the Sticky Bun kiosk just helped to keep Patrick even more in the dazed and confused mode, right? I mean, just like some guys like their Tranny's in a sexually hypnotic state, I mean, just keep the eye balls spinning around and around, right? It also meant that I couldn't lure Patrick into walking me backwards into the food court restroom because Kerri could spy us and I didn't think about that as I was throwing my caramel sauce hissy fit at her kiosk, so.

"Thanks for the sticky bun, Patrick and I don't care that you're hard from interacting with Kerri, I'm still considering it as the closest I've come to actually having sticky buns, so."

"OMG, Johnnie, you're welcome for the sticking bun and thanks for hooking me up with Kerri's number and hanging out with you for a little while at the mall hasn't been the worse thing in my life and no, I didn't die even from all the well, we hung out and we rubbed up against each other and I didn't die, so."

I mean, Patrick was struggling a little with his words, but not one of his words said "now get the hell away from me, you fem boy freak", so I took that as a compliment, LOL, of sorts. And the surprises kept coming as we walked towards the exit doors where I had parked.

And his next surprise basically put me in a state of hypnotic dazed and confused mode when all of a sudden, swoosh, he pushed us both through the side aisle restroom, and I mean like swoosh!

[Mwah, ummah, oomph, ow, uhf, ummah, smack]

"This doesn't mean anything, Johnnie and you had never ever, ever say anything about it!"

[Mwah, ummah, oomph, ow, uhf, uhf, ow, ow, ummah, oomph, smack]

Well, hell, here's the thing about being with someone in a restroom when it could only be considered at a sexual level, whoa, who let's an opportunity like that go by, right?

"Oh, my lips are sealed, Patrick and if this is as far things go, then sobeit, I guess."

[Mwah, ummah, oomph, ummah, smack]

"I'm not afraid, Patrick, so."

Which, apparently, is something that you should never say to a guy who just side walked you into a Men's Room.

"I'm fucking you, Johnnie before I take Kerri out."

[Mwah, ummah, oomph, ummah, smack]

"Whoa, that's only a week away and my brain might need more than a week to agree to that, which is not me saying no, but, whew, I'll get on my knees for you, Patrick. I'm not afraid."

Again, something you should never say to a guy who has a heart beat in a couple of places! Also, who in the hell said that? I mean, I'm still making out with the silicone inner thing from the Flesh-Light for Pete's sakes!

[Mwah, ummah, mwah, smooch, lip smack, lip lock, mwah, ah, rub, rub, mwah, ah, unzip, oh, ahh]

[Restroom door swings open]

"Hey, hey, hey, since when did they install a kissing booth in the Men's Room at the mall then? And where do I buy tickets? And does it cost extra if I want to unzip my pants too?"

Well, you would think that the addition of a stranger, LOL, a stranger who wanted tickets for the kissing booth line, would have driven Patrick right out of the Men's Room door, wouldn't you? Nope, he back walked me even further and into the first stall and made his own private kissing booth. He also wanted a very special and extremely private kiss.

"Oh, I mean, Patrick, I would prefer that we were somewhere else, but I am not afraid to put your hard dick in my mouth. I mean, I like you and I'll do it."

I know, right? That was the worse defense statement ever to say to a guy that was totally worked up! Which was technically my "all worked up" thing now, right? I mean, the Kerri effect had to worn off by the time we crossed the mall, right?

"Patrick, what I meant was that I'd prefer to not kneel on this restroom floor, so?"

I know, right? Who invented knee bend squats, right? I mean, yeah, sure, there are hundreds of memes that show that, especially in the Cottonwood Street alley, but seriously, doesn't that take practice? And stronger legs than my sticks? Which are shapely sticks, thank you very much.

"Alright, Patrick, alright, listen [mwah], I'm sensing that there is a line forming [mwah] just outside of this stall, so we need to leave, but I promise you [mwah] that you can come over to my house [mwah] in a little while to take a shower and [mwah] we, well, you can have me [mwah] both ways today and I'll be your willing and participating [mwah] Water Main Break Girlfriend and if you need another [mwah] shower afterwards, then sobeit and [mwah] no one will ever know [mwah], plus they are banging on the [mwah] stall door and I think that's [mwah] code for it's time to [mwah] go, so?"

[Bang, bang, bang]

"Hurry up in there! My wife will be looking for me soon enough."

Huh, I wasn't sure which of our words got Patrick's attention, but I'm sure it was all of my commitments, right? I mean, the stranger banging on the stall door was like, well, it was my words, so we ran out while covering our faces like movie stars and went our separate ways, which oddly enough, put us both right back on the same street!

[Ping]

"Hah! Is your sticky bun smashed now, flappy lips?"

[Ping]

"Just a smooch. Patrick luvs you already, Kerri."

[Ping]

"Hmm. Some guy asking about kissing booth tickets?"

[Ping]

"Fine, 2 smooches while he bought you a ring."

See? Dazed and confused works in many ways, LOL.

Anyways, wow, the city water workers were still on the street and whoa, that was a large pile of dirt and a lot of water running down the street, but my water still had pressure and ran clear, so I threw a pucker air kiss to the guys because of that whole "Johnnie has flappy lips" thing and prepared for a shower visit from Patrick. And I still wasn't afraid, even if things came down to actual sex.

Also, seriously, the city water workers were whistling and heckling and cat calling as Patrick strolled the few houses down to my place with a fresh change of clothing in his arms, seriously? I mean, I seriously caught that on video and posted it on Chang with a face blur, but still, right? How rude.

What I wished I could have caught on video was how well simple hand signals worked without many words being spoken, right? I mean, Patrick did have a little time to think about what might happen very soon and I'm pretty sure that a limp dick thinks differently than a hard dick, so I made things easy for him. Without saying a word, I extended my arms and he handed me his fresh change of clothing and then I pointed towards the hallway and he headed towards the bathroom. LOL and then I redirected him with my hand on his shoulder and pointed him towards the private bathroom in my bedroom. What he didn't say was "the main bathroom will be fine" or "are you sure" or anything like that, so as they say, the game was on, I guess. I mean, he did say to make sure the doors were locked, but that was all, so.

And I had time to think about things too, so I may have been more nervous than Patrick, but I promise you, I still wasn't afraid for what may come. And to prove that, LOL, I sat on the closed toilet seat and listened to him shower.

[Splash, spray, scrub, splash, scrub, spray]

And I never said out loud that I could smell that he was using my scented body wash, LOL.

[Buzz, buzz, buzz, grr, grr, grr, grr, buzz]

"What the hell is that noise? Johnnie?"

"It's me, Patrick, I was just checking the battery charge level in one of my shavers, but since you want to talk about things, I mean, I don't know why you haven't texted your friend William yet to let him know that the two of you might be stopping by 5-Points tonight, so?"

[Splash, spray, scrub, splash, scrub, spray]

"Well, how is it that when I say nothing, then you hear that I want to talk about something then?"

[Splash, spray, scrub, splash, scrub, spray]

"Well, the shower spray is loud, but no one ever said that your friend William is gay for wanting to get with my friend Josey Jaye and I've heard many people say that sex is just sex, so a guy who wants a piece of guy ass isn't the end of the world, so."

[Splash, spray, scrub, splash, scrub, spray]

"La, la, la, la, la."

"Fine, Patrick, I'll leave you to your la, la, la scrubbing and all."

I mean, I was just putting it out there that what he wanted from me was absolutely no different than what his friend William wanted from my friend, Josey Jaye, right? I mean, except for how my friend Josey Jaye was all goo, goo, ga, ga to be his friend William's sex slut whereas I was just curious about how things felt when two people got together and never mind the silly "some stuff" that I mentioned way in the beginning of my story. Oh, and never mind that I had never seen a naked person in the flesh before because Patrick's exit from the shower took good care of that!

So, back to be hypnotized then by the sight of a damp, yet fit naked Patrick.

[Mwah, ummah, smack]

"I'm not afraid, Patrick."

"And you changed into a jersey for me, Johnnie."

[Gulp]

"If this isn't hurting you, I mean, I've never been squeezed so [mwah] tightly, so."

I mean, it was either "pulse, throb, pulse" or throb, throb, pulse" or something.

"I, ah, I ah, I thought the jersey [mwah] would help you [mwah] keep from seeing what [mwah] you might see if I only removed my shorts, so."

Nope, it was definitely throb, throb, pulse, push, pulse.

"So, Johnnie?"

"I am not [gulp] afraid, Patrick and if you need another shower later, then sobeit [gulp], so?"

"To your bed then, Johnnie."

Well, that's where I was standing anyways, so it was more like, sit on the bed then, to start. And it doesn't matter that he had me both ways before he showered again that day because what mattered was that I was curious and I think, whew, Patrick nailed that curiosity to wall! And to the floor! And into to the bed! All without regrets from my side.

Now, I as it was my first time at real stuff, I mean, I can't say that I took it and gave it like a champ, but I wasn't afraid, although, LOL, afterwards I was afraid that I wouldn't be able to get out of my bed for a while because as I said, damn, Patrick knew something about nailing it! At least that was my "first time" thoughts anyways.

"[Mwah] I'm out now, Johnnie and I never had it so tight, so?????"

"Oh, I mean, I'm not regretting being your Water Main Break Boyfriend for today, but let it settle in your head for a while, but listen Patrick, I mean, I mean, well, thanks for ripping my undies off. I really liked being naked with you, so."

"And??? Help me out, Johnnie."

"OMG, straight guys! You're not gay for smirking while I swallowed your first load, which was my first too and you're not gay for, OMG, splitting me in half from the rear, which was also my first again, but I may question you another day as to why you just so happened to have some lubricated condoms with you, not that I'm, whew, complaining about that, so."

I mean, for a guy who just blew two loads, took two showers and then said "I'm out now" with a cheek kiss, I mean, just how was he able to go poking around between my lips again as I laid in bed basically not willing to move, huh?

And nope, I never did make it to 5-Points that night. Oh, but I did manage to salvage my sticky bun that Patrick bought for me at the mall.

End Johnnie 01