All Comments on 'Just a Little Magic Ch. 13'

It's getting a bit hard not to quick scroll through it now I'm afraid to say :/

Yay, was waiting for this awakening, now to see how the rest of the story plays out.

Cliffhanger

Shit just got real! Lets go!

Nice, wasn't sure how we'd get here, but you've done a really good job writing Peter as an emotionally disturbed, brainwashed person. Part of me is still expecting either his real dad to show up and help save him, or for it to possibly be Sammy/Sophie/Trish and maybe some others talking things out and realizing he needs help.

Finally! Wondered if this kid was EVER gonna pull his head out of his ass. Can't wait to see how this plays out.

OH HELLS BELLS! This is the mother of all cliffhangers you've ever tabled, that I've ever read of your stories. Nothing in Westrons nor Hvad and its sequels compares to this.

I can't see how he's Robert Clifford in the literal sense, nor how he's the demon. Right now he just sounds like the major unwitting lackey of Lillian and Janine that didn't have enough wits to see the "bullshit" until it was right on him. Obviously his "dad" isn't coming, but one thing is certain: he is not some super-powerful arch-mage that will emerge because he does this; if he were "Robert," he'd already be farther along in his magical prowess and perhaps be equal to confronting Lillian. The worst thing is that there are characters in here that are so sympathetic and I don't see how you're going to extricate them from all this without seriously hurting all of them. I would even feel badly for Kavia, because she isn't the she-bitch now she started out being, and much like Peter, has been a slave to her environment without question. I cannot even imagine how Mirella will erupt once she discovers she's fallen for Peter because of Lillian. Irene, Tamara, Ashley and Esther will be so devastated. This is quite literally a nightmare that rises to the level of "The Devil's Advocate," where Al Pacino (as Satan) was coolly cultivating Keanu Reeves to sire offspring with his own sister to create unstoppable lawyers==with Keanu only short-circuiting it all by blowing his own brains out (well, temporarily...it ended on a 'reset').

The biggest thing on my mind is that I cannot see how the hell you will dig him out of all this in a short time and make it sound credible, as there's no way he can suddenly find some "magical wellspring" that takes him to the next galaxy in power overnight. Right now he can't even overcome how Lillian brainwashed him. The only characters in the story remotely capable of having the chops to confront Lillian and Janine on some level are Mirella and Kavia: Mirella because she's no one's fool and Kavia because she understands how to manipulate; only Irene has the legal expertise to even find a way to extricate him from this mess they've entangled him in. However, once more...how will anyone (even Sophie) buy that he was such a tool and have enough sympathy left to help him out? I don't see how he's not going to be so totally alienated and marginalized very quickly here.

I really get the feeling you created this chapter to mirror the "whirlwind" tour of places as well as emotions, as it fits your writing. I felt the fast-paced, hectic visits that Peter did, and his conflicted turmoil which accompanied all of it. I don't seriously think you've painted yourself into a corner like it appears you have, but it SURE feels like it. I really feel as cornered and at my wit's end as poor Peter does.

It's a 5, but I really don't know how you're going to pull all this off in the next chapters without major carnage among these ladies. Damn, man...I'm feeling like Sammy now.

I was ready, a few chapters ago, for him to figure out he was being played. Even so, your pacing and story arc are great. Looking forward to the next chapter.

WOW!!!!!

This was a veeeery long time coming. Hopefully the story starts to get some real speed going. The past two chapters felt exactly the same, just going around and around and around without any real sense of progression. But I'm looking forward a lot towards the next chapter

That took him long enough to figure out...

Wanna say I called it, but I think it was pretty clearly foreshadowed.

I love a good cliffhanger, and I love surprise twist endings. Well done!

Finally! Ihope there was some magical manipulation of him that was leading to the delay in him figuring it out, or not even running the dates in his head of the moon. However, Lillian and Janine are such planners and so manipulative that they must have accounted for this to possibility. I expect them to blackmail him via telling Sammy and has main paramour (Sarah? too many women) or maybe even literally holding them hostage. His relationships with his two most likely long term people will fail (Sarah and Mirella). What woman would believe this story? Like if my wife was having sex with Brad Pitt, and she tried to explain it all away, I probably couldn't take it.

We also don't know the 'magical parameters' of this scenario and neither does he. It would be great if he could find some other knowledgeable person to work with, but that feels unlikely at this point. Can he just not impregnate the first woman and then it's all okay? So a starting this is (1) move her somewhere to safety, (2) sneak off to rescue Sarah and then Sammy. Maybe send his family somewhere, and (3) go into hiding. We don't know what magical powers will be revealed, but I'm looking forward to it.

🎼🎶Dum Dum Dddduuuuuummmmm🎶

Ya got me on that one. Good job!

Was going to write up a bunch of comments, but Comentarista82 basically covered it all. I'm also feeling like Sammy. Can't wait to see where you go with this.

It only took... 4 years for him to figure it out? Not the brightest bulb in the shed, this one... but a fun story nonetheless.

You have this really odd habit of dropping great cliffhangers on us. Thanks.

Aunt Anna to the rescue? Anna vs Lilian the Janine vs Peter & Sophie. Can’t wait to see Sophie use some powers that she did not know were there.

Don’t envy you wrapping it all up.

Finally!! The last couple of chapters felt like a slog.....but this cliff had some SNAP!! Loved it.

Finally!! Been waiting for this moment for about eleven chapters now.

So Lilian & Janine were expecting him not to figure out that there's a full moon tonight for 12 consecutive full moon nights?

It's Lillian and Janine who want the coven for their own uses.

The next chapter should definitely be interesting from a story perspective.

If Lillian was telling the truth about being able to see people's futures, then Peter's realization would've been part of her plan. How? Do Lillian and Janine have powers they haven't shown us yet, such as the ability to control Peter's physical actions?

Lillian might have prescience blind spots she didn't tell him about, though. Fighting someone who can predict the future (even imperfectly) has got to be crazy hard.

I kinda was thinking maybe there was more to the story. I had the idea that Lillian and Janine were not letting Peter know the full truth, but damn that was a plot twist.

That explains why he vomits looking at horoscopes.

Absolutely love this story, loved the slow buildup to setting up Lillian and Janine as evil, love harem stories in which the "harem master" is just a pawn in a much bigger game. Really hoping that there's gonna be a happy ending.

The plan requiring that Peter not notice a full moon during ANY of the sexual encounters seems like a HUGE hole. Hopefully there’s more to come.

Yep. Not that I’m smart or anything but this is so much like the rest of his writing. It had to be something and we all knew that the bitches were out to use him.

Now, how does he turn the tables.

Thanks for another great read.

I had suspected that the vomiting was a spell that Lillian had cast on him, as it always seemed to pop up whenever there were discussions of the future (or commitment? I’ll need to reread earlier chapters)

I mean, the whole point is that it’s pretty obvious to us, and to folks like Sammy, but he doesn’t know because he’s been hypnotized not to notice right? Like, this is where Peter wakes up... it’s been pretty obvious to an observant reader that this reveal was coming. Although it had been long enough I was just starting to doubt before he started getting sick suspiciously.

Oh, boom. I did not see that coming. Holy shit. Amazing.

Saw this coming a mile away. I think you starting placing hints of Janine and Lillian's wickedness after the first few chapters.

This series is just GREAT, I love it. Thanks for writing and sharing!

Ah, fascinating twist! It occurred to me a couple of segments ago Pete is preparing to do what they said Robert Clifford was preparing to do...and somehow it must figure into the story.

It's been obvious for a while that this is all Lillian, the fact that the MC cannot see that he's been brainwashed by her hypnosis and it's all her idea and she is right royal screwing up his life is stretching my belief in the MC being intelligent.

I am really loving this story, but how could anyone get the dates of full moons wrong when they are predictable for the next million years or so? I think I’m missing something, and I can’t wait to find out what!!!

Holy shit!

And this is why I don’t date. Well, one possible reason.

I really enjoyed the emotional churn as this story developed. Glad to see the penny drop for David; was afraid he would find out too late through someone else and thought, “He’s gonna be pisssssed..!” I figure he still will, and I can’t wait to see how that manifests.

Thanks for the great read!

Oops, you called Janine (Janice)...2nd page...

And...oops, Pete JIST FIGURED OUT THE LIES HE HAS BEEN BEING TOLD ALL THIS TIME!! LILLIAN AND JANINE HAVE BEEN LYING...USING HIM...

EXCEPT, PETE IS NOT A MONSTER!! Now he has this figured, his HAREM, his daughter's for the coven HE will head up, and he will be a powerful force in the "white magic" world ..to fight against the likes of Janine and Lillian!!

Wow, what a twist...his conscience has been prodding him...and now he knows...Cannot wait to see how he and Sam work this out...with the help of the ladies, of course!!

Five Very Much Deserved Stars...🌋🌋🌋🌋🌋🌠🌠🌠🌠🌠🙏🌌🌌🌌🌌💯💯💯💯💯💯💯💯💯

It took the dozy twerp long enough. How will be deal with it? Must read chapter 14. Now!