All Comments on 'Lament Ch. 02'

James is an asshole.

Good One.

Well written. 4/5

Needs a conclusion- Still incomplete

I think she's better off. James sounds like a wimp

Why did you not tell directly after it happend? That is something that always gets asked after everything goes to shit. You will probable get some comments about that, but simply put, it does happen and everybody reacts differently. If we all could see the future and understand the consequences life would be boring.

The husband is scum of the lowest order.

Sad story of two broken souls. Nicely written story.

What fools we mortals are!

Are all your male characters so screwed up? You write well. I hope your stories help you find the peace you seem to lack.

Well, in my opinion she's better of without the miserable arsehole. She didn't cheat, rape isn't cheating, and she lied only by omission. Much the same as James did when he didn't tell her about the paternity tests. The difference being she thought it best not to say anything, whether she was right or wrong is beside the point, she did what she thought was best for all concerned. On the other hand, he tried, convicted and condemned her, and not just her but his daughter too, and yes she was his daughter, he raised and loved her for eighteen years. He also acted like a spoilt brat for two years, and instead of confronting her he ran away to sulk.

He claims he won't divorce her but neither will he return, if that's what he wants I suggest she divorces him and finds somebody more mature and responsible.

Good writing. Sad and painful story.

The ending sucked because it left James' fate in limbo.

First of all, running away and leaving Nikki all the marital assets felt like he was financially rewarding her for causing this whole nightmare in the first place. Just divorce the dumb bitch, take his 50% and move on to new pastures.

I'm not surprised James also dropped all contact with the cuck Mattias. There's nothing more depressing than seeing a friend be stupid enough to reconcile with a cheating slut.

This should've concluded with James dating a broody 30-something, then having a couple of kids with the younger second-wife.

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Nikki got what she deserved for keeping secrets from her husband. If she'd been honest with him at the time, you can bet your ass that James would've pointed out the paternity spectre when his "accidentally fucked" wife found out she was pregnant.

As James said in his letter, it doesn't really matter what her excuses are (aside from a baby swap). Her husband wanted biological children of his own, but Nikki's now too old to provide them, and therefore totally useless to him. The big question I had was why didn't they have multiple children in their decades-long marriage? If she'd given him a couple of kids of his own, James might not have abandoned the family.

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I think telling this story from the wife's point of view was actually a mistake, because as soon as the husband left her, she no longer had any real power over the future of their relationship. If the protagonist is powerless to affect the outcome of a story, then it makes it considerably less interesting, as they can only react to events.

So SAD but VERY well written. thank you

Nothing resolved here. What about establishing paternity and maternity?

Well, James could impregnate a young willing woman that doesn’t want to raise a child. But still wants to have a child. Then she can raise James’ child as her own. She can be the cuckold. That is about the only way I can see her reconciling with him. Of course she’s going to play dumb and sit at home doing nothing because she can’t fathom the only option that would help. It would require too much love and sacrifice. And she’s not about that. To be fair, most people aren’t. But her love doesn’t run as deep as she claims, is my point. I think James was correct about his assessment of both him and her.

This was way better than I was expecting it to be, especially from a new author. This was great and sad. I feel for Nikki because it wasn't her fault, but she should've told him.

Strong story and can't wait for more from you.

I was smart enough to skip past when I saw the writers name.

Author did a great job illustrating how important honesty is in a marriage. If she would have told James right after Brendan raped her none of this ever happens. Especially hard to figure out why she never told James considering that her Brendan and Amy sat around and discussed it a few days later. Why wouldn't she have demanded that James be part of that conversation?

James' pain is totally understandable but, even he finally admits his decision not to confront her and have a conversation was a mistake.

Sad situation where neither husband or wife really did anything wrong other than not talking to each other yet, the marriage is irreparably damaged.

Only plot point I have an issue with is the idea that James was so hurt and angry over discovering that Olive wasn't his daughter yet he was able to keep it so well hidden that no one suspected something was bothering him. For him to have the rage he did in order to take the action he did ... I'm not sure even a professional actor could have pulled off that performance.

Gonna have to go with Karnevil on this one; James turned into a miserable wife hating douche-bag, living a life of misery, making everyone around him miserable, with no chance of forgiveness or even trying to see both sides of the story. Now, Nikki is making a similar mistake; divorce the jerk, get over him, and move on. He's not worth shedding even one more tear on. Olive should give him an ultimatum- pull his head out of his hind-quarters or she's done with him, too.

Like others, I hate where you left us, but it was a very "real" ending. Well written and seemed like I was seeing this unfold in a very real way. That's hard for a writer to do - 5*

It was a very good read, one that does pose questions. I can understand why she didn't tell James. That doesn't mean it is the correct decision. I'm sure the shit wouldn't have hit the fan and a fight would have ensued. Given the fact that a rape has been proved and James remains away, it's probably for the best.

Was a good story until you introduced "the woman is always the victim" theme. She knew what she was doing because she remembered it very clearly many years later. Anyone who has experienced a date rape drug knows they have a very cloudy memory at best, if any at all. She was aware of what she was doing and didn't stop. She was not a victim of rape. She was culpable for her actions. Olive is a typical young person with no life experience. She simply looked for the easiest pathway and "mom you're a victim" was it. She is foolishly naive because she is young but presenting her argument so forcefully hurt the story. Mattias was the only one with character, although I question his judgement of staying with a woman who was going to fuck some young guy just because he was hot. Mattias was right to confront James and what he said was spot on. At some point James will wake up and realize he should have worked toward a resolution of some kind, even if it was leaving Nikki after talking things through. Again, it was a well written story, but shifting to Brendan being a bad guy and Nikki being a victim ruined it.

James is too stupid to pine after, she clearly didnt cheat on him and hez shooting blanks so hez lucky to have a daughter at all. There’s a difference between being a father who raised a kid and being a sperm doner

Sad, is there going to be a Lament ch3 to bring closure?

This story still needs a whole lot of closure on every characters part.

So... he's still a genetic dead end because of her with no kids of his own. Realistic and sad.

James is a coward and a jerk. Both Olive and Nikki are better off letting him go off and pout.

don't blame James for dumping Nikki but glad he sees Olive. It is a constant reminder of the event so healing is difficult if not impossible. Olive is a constant reminder.

Paternity needed to be established. Poor ending

Sometimes the only power we have is the power to endure. And in enduring, a path opens up that we can follow and then take action… thank you for the well written story that felt real. It would have been easy to paint James as a bad man for leaving and hurting his daughter. But having Mattias say his bit on his take on James was really brilliant. The timing is just right—it helps us understand things from James’ perspective. Balancing. It is a complex situation and you did an excellent job of conveying that complexity and ambiguity. For both parties. That is RARE in the LW category where many prefer the comfort of black and white options and actions. I agree with other commentators who raise this: you need a part three. The path forward is clear—her ex needs a child. Why did they only have one? Did I miss that? What if she were to offer … well, more complexity would clearly follow that line… cheers

I actually enjoyed the story. Belief that a man would walk away, giving up everything financially, is a bit of a stretch.

Plus, you needed to tie up loose ends. Brendon had said he would do a paternity/DNA test BUT we never got to hear the result! What if he wasn't a match and therefore not the father? That would have opened up pandora's box.

So, the wife, at a comparatively young age, is going to become a "nun"?(So to speak) Wait around for... well forever! Just hoping he comes back to her. So, a disjointed finish. Cheers.

James is a self absorbed, moralizing, drama queen. He took the time to explain that he sent the 4 paternity tests to 4 different labs in 4 different parts of the country to ensure accuracy. SERIOUSLY?!? Who does that? No wonder she cheated on him. I actually don’t blame her.

Then you write that he just ups snd leaves without any consequence? What universe do you live in? Divorce court would eat him alive! Paternity. Alimony. And the fact that he willingly abandoned the home, he abandoned any claim to it.

Either this is, or comes close to being, a textbook Greek tragedy. 5. Now onto some QuickMagazine speculative detective work. The author's name is BlueGee. Which suggests BeeGee. Which suggests Aussie. Supported by this writer's Favorites page, where the first 3 names are Vandemonium1, CreativityTakesCourage & SemperAmare. (the others, HardDaysKnight, laptopwriter, other2other1 and rhetthebrat, are also all high quality) BlueGee does not list a gender, but I'm hazarding a guess, based solely on "Lament," of female. Anyway, besides trying to peek behind the curtain, my point here is that both writer and story favorites suggest this new author knows what time it is. And, therefore, someone worth monitoring closely. Including a possible chapter three.

Great story. I liked the way it ended. Life doesn't come in neat, tied up packages. You had the courage to reflect that in your writing.

All that's ever mentioned here is paternity testing.

If James was doubtful enough of the first test results to repeat them four times, why wouldn't he have included Nikki's DNA and also test for maternity in at least ONE of the additional three tests, so that any possibility of infant switching after birth could be eliminated? Instead, he "assumed" Nikki cheated, which his tests could easily have either verified or disproved.

James should kill himself...he's a real piece of shit. What an awful story. Why doesn't the daughter tell him to fuck off! If he's too big of coward to face his fuck ups...I guess he is a fuck up...then he should move on. Why is the wife so attached to the loser. In most all cheating stories, the husband rolls up his little world and runs, turning off his phone or ignoring texts. Everyone I know who owned a cheater, wanted as much info as possible to make her life as horrible as humanly possible. She not the brightest bulb in the room either.

"Karnevilabout 5 hours ago

Well, in my opinion she's better of without the miserable arsehole."

I agree. If you can't support someone who's been raped--and you claim to love them--I'm not sure you're an adult.

And what is with not confronting the situation when he found out? She was RAPED. So, yeah, there's a bunch of shame that goes with that.

These male characters, by and large, lack empathy to the point that they are really little more 'tweens in their intellectual development. "Something bad happened to me therefore I must make sure something bad happens to another."? Very adolescent.

I get not being passive. But I don't see any need to make retribution something I spend any time pursuing. i got way better things to do with my time, like reading about imaginary characters doing stupid shit and injecting my own morality into comments about them.

Interesting take on the infidelity scenario.

James was a dick.

Hopefully James can move on and find someone to have kids of his own with.

I liked the presentation and flow of the story. It shows that a story doesn't have to be super complex to be entertaining. Also the writer didn't use any of the observe cliche' normally associated with "Creating Spouse" stories. I wonder if Mary wouldn't be better off without James. He seems to be a weak character, absorbed in himself and his feeling. Slinking away for 2 years and exhibiting behavior I would not be proud of.... Anyway i realize the s1ory is fiction ...enough said. Looking forward to reading more of your work...

Need a part 3

Very well written. I look forward to more from you. Both stories have been intriguing even tho I think there have been some plot holes un both that need to be overlooked for the sake of the story. Still very well done.

Oh, and James is a fucking coward.

Your story was interesting and well done but damn do I hate men that tuck tail and run away from their problems. Especially those that have children. Yes, she wasn't his biological daughter but she is his daughter in every other sense. I liked the twist with her friend being caught cheating also. That was a good add to the story.

How did Brendan "get her naked?" Drunk sex is not rape, which even the so-called "victim" realizes here.

Unless you believe women have no agency of their own, and should be absolved for getting drunk and running down and killing a pedestrian.

So, from the facts in the story, Nikki and James were together for over twenty years and Olive was the only child. Of course, in the story James and the readers learn that James isn't the biological father of Olive. Makes you wonder WHY Nikki and James never ever had any other children in their twenty years together. Did Nikki and or James decide not to have any other children? Or did Nikki have complications from Olives birth that prevented her from conceiving or having any additional children? Or was James infertile? You would have thought that if they wanted more children and Nikki was able to have more children that they would have went to the doctors to discovery what problems existed. If Nikki was the reason why they never had any more children because she decided she didn't want any more children then you could see the reason behind James anger at Nikki and his feeling that Nikki had cheated him out of any progeny. Leaving him an evolutionary dead-end so to speak. If Nikki had only told James the next day after the so-called accident then they might have still been together. Establishing paternity should be a mandatory requirement before a man's name is ever listed on a birth certificate. Paternity fraud is a man's worst nightmare. If women new they couldn't hide their dirty little secretes any more they might be more forth coming.

Totally agree with Karnevil husband is not a man just a wimp she is far better without him.

Ehhh, I still have no sympathy... she should've told him🤷🏽‍♀️.. everything else is just bullshit excuses.. why didn't she tell him? This wasn't explained. He ran because he was hurt. He believed his whole

Perfect marriage/life was a facade. Why wouldn't he believe she's lied about other men? She was able to keep that secret for years.. never once thought about telling him. Yeah, he should've spoke to her when he found out, but what was that going to change? She still ended up with Brendan pumping in and out of her. She still kept it a secret. It's not just the cheating. It's the lies before or after the act. Brendan was a pervert but he still confessed.. regardless if his confessions were just ploys to cover his ass....she just thought if she buried it than it didn't happen, if he didn't cum than it wasn't cheating... secrets will erode a relationship quicker than quicksand.. cheating makes you question everything. It makes you doubt yourself. The state of utter mind fuck you be in when you find out the person you love, the person who claim they love you, is betraying you and keeping secrets. The person that's suppose to have your back is stabbing you in it... the person that is suppose to be your person had no problem looking you in your face and lying to you for 20yrs!. Until you've actually been through it, you'll never understand it.. they absolutely mightve had a chance had she immediately went to him and told him. It would've been a struggle but he seemed like be loved her enough to forgive her. It was the lying to him for all this time. She would've died with this secret. She had no intentions of telling. How is he suppose to get past that? How would he be able to trust her after this? Without trust you have nothing. He can't even trust her to tell him the truth.

Sad tale, well told!

It wasn't so much the infidelity as the lying. He should have confronted her, so he was lying as well. You need a chapter 3 with a reconciliation in light of the rape. She has been faithful for the 20 years after the rape, and even after the abandonment, so I feel like the conditions for a RAAC have been met. This chapter contained no resolution.

I agree with your profile statement. As a clinical social worker of over 40 years, nothing is black and white with humans. No matter what so of nuts want here.

Good story. I want to hear more about Mattias beating the shit out of Amir.

Wow... really, realistically, real. Damn, nobody is likable in this story, nor is anyone a villain. So many tangential and corollary factors to consider. The proverbial tangled web. Excellent. As mentioned previously, chapter 3 might be in order. I wonder if OP might've based this on a real situation. 5++++/5!

No where in the story did you answer the most important question, is Nikki Olive’s mother? Or could babies been mixed-up in the hospital and did Nikki and James have a child out there?

You write pretty well but the finer details really chip away at the foundations of your stories.

While I suppose that James walking out on Nikki is possible...sorry knuckle dragging alpha male wannabes, that is how some people are wired (think of it like this, everything says Trump is a coupe planning fat orange fuck of a fascist, a weak, intellectually lacking, piss poor rendering of a man and yet many see him as a smart, loves America leader and a svelte Alpha male) but walking away from the woman he thought was his daughter, that kind of throws me. If I found out my son wasnt mine, after all these years, I wouldnt walk away. HIs mother on the other hand may wish to pull a James herself.

The devils in the details, as in your other story as well.

Drunken sex is rape If it is part of a scheme by a particular individual it was individual to constantly get women to have sex with him. Because at that point it's not a mistake it's a criminal activity of deception.

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The husband's action is don't make any sense. He believes certain things to be true so he runs. His pain is real and the story did a great job of showing his pain.

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But it turns out that some of the things he thought was true which led him to leave the family in the marriage were not true. For The husband did not change anything based upon this new information makes no sense. Looks like the husband is throwing an intellectual temper tantrum

She can do better, James is a first class pussy

I read very few stories that I believe deserve a reconciliation, but this is one. Chapter 3 please.

I hope Brendan is sentenced to many years in jail. What a POS! 5* story.

To all those going on about her being raped and how that changes things. Read the story again. At the time she 1) didn't consider it rape, 2) laughed about it with her "rapist" and another friend, and 3) kept is secret from the one person she should have told. Sorry, what she is going through now is more the result of her bad choices than the sexual act.

I do agree with those that don't like the way he treated his daughter. I also don't see it as overly believable. If he was going to that route, he wouldn't have stayed married for 2 extra years solely for her. If she was such an abomination to him, he would have walked shortly after getting the DNA results.

I think a more interesting situation would have been a switched at birth type scenario. In this scenario, Mary is still partially responsible for the situation, even if she didn't actively/willing step out on him. She still lied to him which led to him unknowingly raising a child somebody else put in his wife. In contrast, the fallout from finding out that neither of them was a biological parent to the child they had been raising would have led to a much different story.

Among many other inadequacies, James is a biological dead end. No polluting the gene pool, no little fragile snowflakes melting under the intense heat of life and love, no turning an ass into a thoroughbred. This woman is SO better off without this whiny heartless coward, masquerading as a man. Pathetic. I wonder how long Olive will tolerate his self pity and self imposed victim status. Having come from better seed, even that of a rapist, her compassion may be strained by her logic and reason. This sniveling little snail ruined her family, because his wife didn't inform him of what she had thought was a very short ineffective coupling with a drunk friend. And in the 18 years following, the sad sack couldn't replicate what Olive's bio dad achieved in a couple of minutes. The dumb fuck is probably sterile. It would serve him right.

Not sure what your goal was in writing this abortion, but I hope you achieved it. Thanks for the effort.

Really good story. Tend to agree with others. She’s better off without James! Good job BlueGee.

I think it would be interesting if Nikki would have had a DNA test done and found she wasn't Olive's mother! Hospital switched at birth!

"We both need to atone for our transgressions" tell me please, what are the husband's transgressions against his wife?

3*

LOL at all the cucks in here thinking James is a piece of shit. This woman cheated on him, lied to him for decades about it and tried to pass off another man's child as his own. And he is supposed to do what? Just get over it? Fuck that.

This is basically every man's worst nightmare. I thought he handled it about as nobly as any man could, stuck around till the child was an adult then left to restart his life. He didn't BTB or anything else like that. He found out his entire life is a lie and that the woman he loved had cheated him out of ever having kids of his own.

No, James isn't the asshole here. Hopefully any part 3 has James moving on and finding himself a younger woman that will finally love him enough to be honest and faithful to him and give him the chance to finally have kids of his own.

I wasn't going to comment, but for those of you that liked it, thanks, for those that didn't, that's fine too. This is fiction, there are obvious liberties taken with certain things. Everyone can read and/or view the story how they like, that's cool. We all have our own proclivities and that's great. It's a story about lost communication and broken trust and is something that happens every day in every suburb across the world. People don't have the gift of foresight and thus often make decisions based upon false information or half-truths and can live to regret it.

For those that decry James, I didn't write him to be a sympathetic and tragic hero, but one half of the problem that ends with the destruction of a marriage. His cowardice is front and center as is his anger.

But I wanted to just give a shout out to @miket0422. Thanks for your comments, I really do appreciate them. As to your concern over the plot point you were unhappy with, can I humbly suggest that you re-read the opening of Chapter 1, as it deals directly with James' inability to conceal his displeasure, and that Nikki was well aware that there were deep seated problems with her marriage, she just wasn't sure what they were.

Thanks again.

of the 4 stories you've written and I've read-this is by far and away the best.

When she decided not to tell her husband some guy tried to fuck her, she doomed their relationship. It’s not like the guy walks into a bathroom and saw her naked. MAYBE they agree to not share that embarrassment, but even that event should be shared with her spouse. No, the guy stuck his dick into her! How the fuck do you not tell your spouse about that?

I hated how James treated his daughter, Yes HIS daughter! He is the only father she has ever known and he was a total dick. Finally, in the end he tries to reconnect with Olive, he’ll never be able to repair the damage he did by rejecting his innocent daughter.

This is a great story, but because it's so sad and feels unfinished I only rated it 4-stars. As the author 'BlueGee' says ... James is not a sympathetic victim in this story. To my way of thinking, James not only let his hate consume his love for his wife but also his daughter. That's unforgivable, no matter the circumstance Olive is the innocent one. The man, and I use that term lightly, to turn on her, the one who loves the man who has been her father figure, her protector, her knight in shining armor for eighteen years, is just ... TOTALLY unbelievable.

I recall another story where the father did the DNA test nearly destroyed his marriage and family and they discovered that the hospital had mixed up the name tags of two families giving birth at the same time and sent them home to be raised by the other family. That is what I thought this might be when I started reading it.

NOW ... for the smallminded idiots that think because a woman laughs about a rape or doesn't immediately report it and tell the world about it, EDUCATE yourself and read about the trauma and shame that practically every rape victim experiences. Denial is one of the top responses. It's easier to pretend it didn't happen, or it was a mistake, just move on and try to push it to the far corners of their minds. Because their friend would never do something like 'that', never hurt them like 'that'. That's why so much incest goes unreported. We put our faith in those who would never hurt us, and then they do.

One other bit of info for the brain dead of uneducated. PRECUM has little swimmers in it, most are dead in the beginning, and it would be very rare, but it only takes one sperm to fertilize the egg. Also, if you use the pull-out method, you're very likely to be a daddy before you know it. The closer to ejaculation the more sperm get into the precum. Have a Happy Father's Day, dad!

I would have also left her....her laughing about the incident with the other 2 involved parties without telling James is the nail in her coffin. She didn't respect him enough to have full disclosure and instead honored the other couple by choosing their friendship over her relationship with her husband. That is a betrayal that many would think inconsequential but is a cancer. It ate at the foundations of their marriage

"I should have talked to your mother when I first got the results". No shit Sherlock.

I think everyone is better off without James in their lives.

No heroes here. Many commenters seem to think that a claim of rape nullifies Nikki's poor choices. First, her "one time with Brendan and he didn't even cum in me" wasn't on the face of it rape. She didn't think it was; it appeared to her for years to be a drunken mistake and a result in part of her bad choices. And indeed until this nightmare scenario and LOTS of digging, it had never came out that "Brendan" did the same thing with 8 or 9 different women. Yes, now it's apparent that Brendan had an MO, a standard plan to have sex with other women while they were drunk and unable to give consent. It's rape, BUT the fact remains, Nikki never told her husband and it does seem that even she acknowledges that she was over-the-top, out-of-line with her "flirting" with Brendan; she made very bad choices and ended up where bad things could happen. She is NOT a total innocent, even though as it turns out, she is undoubtedly a victim of non-consensual sexual assault.

As for James, yes, he was terribly wrong and unfair to reject Olive for something about which she was wholly innocent. But for all those who think James is a complete piece of shit, think for a moment about finding out after so many years that your one and only child is not biologically yours; that your wife must have cheated on you and concealed it for all that time. Just like Nikki, he's human too; he made a mistake with Olive, a terrible one that he is trying to mitigate. But he also has been wounded by a wife who lied about never having had "sex" with anyone else, a wife who concealed the fact that her overly "flirtatious" drunken behavior had led to her being in a compromised position, and a wife who finally pieces together after almost 20 years that the "innocent" mistake with Brendan was part of a long pattern of activity by that predator. She did not know that and could not know that when her "mistake" happened. It took years of Brendan's misconduct and people then piecing it together to make sense of a criminal's MO. But spare a bit of pity for James; he was blindsided by a man's worst nightmare because Nikki chose NOT to tell him what had happened with Brendan.

I guess all of this is to say that Nikki's concealment of the "one time penetration and he didn't even cum inside of me" came back to viciously bite her and James both. As I said at the start of this comment, there are no heroes, just badly damaged people. This story is very well written and its unsatisfying ambiguity because sometimes, there are circumstances and choices where everyone loses; sadly, that is a reflection of real life.

muddled mess

reply:

ibuguserabout 1 hour ago

"I should have talked to your mother when I first got the results". No shit Sherlock.

I think everyone is better off without James in their lives.

Of course, it's all the VICTIM's fault because said victim just happens to have a penis. She lied by omission for TWENTY years for her own benefit. He kept HER secret for two to spare his daughter the pain and suffering before she graduated and left to start her own life, then walked away and left a ten-times worse liar EVERYTHING they built. How is HE the asshole here again? Pay attention to the actual story stupid.

This was a sad, miserable, pointless story. What were you trying to write? We’re you trying to make James out to be a macho btb man that burns his wife.?

Was this about a wife’s rape, or an infidelity?

Was this about a father abandoning his daughter?

Did you want us to sympathize with James?

Did you want us to think James was an asshole? because that’s what I took from this story.

Or maybe you just wanted to write a sad story.

I’m not trying to attack you bluegee, but I was really confused about what point your story was trying to make, maybe I just completely missed it.

Thank you for your time and effort. KS

Only innocent is Olive.

"Just One Man's Opinion" below, speaks for me. Eloquently and Cogently. Nuff said.

Just fucking boring, Wasted my time

James is a fucking coward

Pathetic. The other more obvious possibility is tgat Olive isn’t their daughter - nothing in story indicates that her maternal heredity was verified.

The guy is a passive aggressive coward, little better than her rapist. IMO.

What a waste of fucking time! A woman lies about being raped, a scumbag abandons a girl who has only ever known him as a father. Where are the minus scores?

They never confirmed if it was that guy Brennden who was father. I thought it was going to be a mix up at the hospital and babies were switched by accident

The first part had promise. The second part was a disappointment to say the least. Not that James wanted anything do with Nikki, but your explanation of this so called “rape” was really not her fault. Drunk and mistook Brendan’s fault only. After a little bit more experience on your part, the storyline should improve. A four star on the first part, a two star on the second.

James is a prick of a man.

Need a third part to finish the story….

A real honest to god tragedy. It all makes sense, but somehow, someone should ask the question of both James and Nikki: "Are you better off without your spouse or not?" In t his case I can't believe either could honestly say: "without". Sometimes you come out way ahead when you are backed into an impossible position and have to fight your way out. Once in my life with my long term partner we had a terrible fight (about what I really don't remember) and she assumed that I would be leaving and was making appropriate preparations. I stopped in the middle of these preparations and looked at her and said forcefully: "Do you want me to leave?" She didn't really hesitate and said just as forcefully: "No". So I didn't, and we stayed together for the rest of her life. As I've said in commentary on many a story in Literotica, so many problems are solved or at least resolved if people only talk to each other. You can never return to where you once were, but usually you're better off together than apart. One might ask of the author of this tragedy: why didn't James and Nikki have other children? That would have made all the difference in the world. In reading other stories by this author I conclude that we have a very inexperienced, perhaps naïve writer who only sees the world in stark black and white and not the shifting grey that it really is. 4*

Dudes kind of a moron. He should have bailed years ago when he found out and immediately started lifting.

Dude is in Australia. Just get a Filipino bride. Just a couple hour plane ride. Filipinas are very pragmatic, she'd have absolutely zero issue popping out a kid or two for him for citizenship if he were up front about everything. Might have to send her to nursing school or something. Don't be a dick and just pay for the schooling. When you divorce her she'll make good enough money for when she has the kids.

Oh and come to think of it he totally does need to have 2 kids. That way he can go back to his dingbat pseudo cheating wife and make her help him raise 2. Why 2 though? Because he would have 50/50 custody with his ex so the 2nd kid makes up for missing out half the time. Then every morning he can wake up next to his wife. And they can stare deeply into each others eyes in silence, both smiling. Then he can scream at the top of his lungs "Go make breakfast for someone else's kids girl cuck! Fucking sucks doesn't it? Well get moving! And don't pull that Lucky Charms crap again. Make them something as if you actually cared about them like they were your own kids and not some latchkey kid your real kids befriended that you feel sorry for because they never want to go home because his parents ignore him! You know, that kid that is not allowed to use the oven so he ate a box of Kraft Mac n' Cheese noodles raw and ended up puking it all up over the new trampoline your father bought for the kids with what your parents got back on their taxes! And you had to throw it out because you couldn't get the smell out no matter what you threw at it and had to make your kids lie to their grandparents when they ask them if they're enjoying the new trampoline!"

Well-written story, but two big holes. Was a DNA test ever done to confirm whether or not Brendan was Olive's father? And is Nikki Olive' genetic mother? As babies do get switched at birth, I can't believe this possibility wasn't considered I thought this switched at birth was going to be your story! 4 stars

It was interesting story but with serious MISSES that have been mentioned by others that came to me while reading.

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1. Is Olive Nikki's per DNA OR a hospital baby swap mistake?

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2. Is Brenden the DNA father of Olive?

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Without these two critical factors the story is at a stalemate - no redemption, no conclusions, just limbo due to James immaturity!

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Hence there is no REAL conclusion to this saga.

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3.3***, hooyah....., due to being incomplete and not well thought-out

People keep asking about maternity of Life and thinking that's a hole in the story.

It's not a hole.

It might be a mistake in the characters behalf, but characters in a story can and do make mistakes. It's called characterisation. It is intentionally avoided to highlight how damaged people make mistakes.

People in pain don't always think clearly.

That isn't a plot hole, it's a character trait.

Just saying.

Still, enjoy that people are thinking about the story, for whatever reasons.

Sad.

This one will sit with me for awhile. One of the rare ones where you have sympathy for all parties. Gotta say, though, when the dust settled... James really sucks.

He pretty much admitted that he wants to ruin three lives because she lied. Once. After she was raped. A big lie, sure, but it wasn't malicious, and his reaction on learning the truth of what really happened is the definition of juvenile.

Anyway, it's the sign of a good story that makes a reader ponder instead of shrug and scroll on, so thank-you.

Very disappointing ending. James is not much of a man.

Angering but that's high quality writing right there.

I don't understand all the commenters that criticize James. There is no set template for how a man should feel that the daughter he raised isn't biologically his. That his wife was raped but didn't tell him.

The only thing i could really criticize him for would be the 2 years of stupid, that's about it.

He dealt with it the only way he knew how and that's completely fine.

James is a total asshole.

Good story

Didn't like ending But I admit to being a romantic.

Only way to end. She cheated by not telling him immediately.

Absolution possible But not happening.

James did the right thing. She cheated and lied. If she was honest from the start I'm sure any guy would get over it. Truth hurts, but lies are worst.

Another great story! It saddened me when the truth came out and I was hoping for a reconciliation. James was right about one thing, Nikki laughed about it with Amy and Brendan but didn't tell him. She kept that from him, their little secret. Did she not trust him to see it for what it was, a drunken engagement that she called off when she realized what was happening? The sex was a mistake, the secret was not. What is worse...a drunken tryst premeditated by the guy or keeping the secret from your husband while your best friend and her then husband knew all about it, laughed about it? Was the marriage irredeemable? Not really but who are we to tell another what they should feel or think?

This is so full of sugar it makes me wanna puke. Wanna write Shakespearian tragedy with this lemonade of a cause? So, it is a rape and the hubby character is abandoning his whole family after keeping it quiet for 2 years, going into self-destructive mode? Who does that? The whole story is describing a mentally and emotionally handicapped person (hubby) and not because of cheating but because your hubby character is a halfway to a complete lunatic.

What do you want to write? Romance novels with BTB twist?

Wow! Powerful and emotional. The part I loved the most was the real fidelity between the husband and wife, in the middle of the pain and confusion. The story could not have worked without the horrible communication, and therefore we would not have this gem without it. I still want a healing for them. Pretty crazy investment of emotions for a bunch of ones and zeros. Thanks for this treasure.

@dark2donut2….I challenge you to write something better. If not then stop your whining and find a story that appeals to you.