Lexxy Baby Pt. 07

Monique went with it at first, thinking that he just needed to process things. He wasn't one to talk about himself, after all. Look how long it took him to tell her about his family. She backed off, hoping to give him the space he needed. When he was ready, she figured he'd be the one to bring it up.

Only, he never did. Weeks went by, and he seemed content with the status quo of their friendship. In fact, he'd even begun hinting around to the fact that he wanted Monique to meet this bitch!

"I think you two would get along." Alex said almost three weeks after the bridge. He was talking to her between pumping out a set of 10 reps on the bench press. The heavy bar clanged as he put it back in its cradle.

His eyes shot to Monique quicker than she anticipated. She couldn't wipe the scowl of disinterested annoyance from her face fast enough.

"I'm sure." she said dryly as she added more weight to the bar. Then, attempting to steer the subject back to where it belonged, she said, "Okay. You're all set. Give me 10."

"Mo..."

"Alex. 10. Now. We don't have all day."

He didn't start his set. He just looked at her, trying to gauge the inner workings of her head. But she'd had time to put on her poker face, so she wasn't giving him anything.

"What?" she asked indifferently.

"Are you okay?"

"Of course. But we need to finish your workout. I have another client in 20."

His eyes narrowed momentarily, but he decided to drop it. Lining his hands up on the bar, he hoisted the weights up, slowly lowered it to his chest, and began to pump out his reps.

The large elephant sitting between them made the rest of the workout a quiet one. None of the comfortable, friendly banter that normally existed between them was present. There was an awkwardness today, especially when he tried to talk to her about Cameron.

When the workout was finished, Monique simply walked off towards the locker room. Alex watched her, but then jogged and caught up with her before she disappeared through the doors.

Grabbing her lightly by the arm to stop her, he said, "Hey Mo."

"What's up?"

He hesitated, like he didn't know what to say. Finally, he asked bluntly, "Why don't you wanna meet Cameron?"

Monique looked to him, let out a sigh, and softly said, "You know why, Lexxy."

Innocently, he said, "Aside from Greg, you're my best friend. If anyone should want to meet her, it'd be you."

At first, she thought he was being facetious. But the genuine look of confusion on his face said otherwise.

How the hell could he be confused? Did he genuinely block out her confession? Was she not clear enough? Maybe she dreamed about that night on the bridge, and it never actually happened.

Lord knows she dreamed about everything else!

The whole "give him a chance to come around" approach was for the birds. Was this what he went through when the shoe was on the other foot? Sitting back with this festering, unsatisfied desire? How could he even stand to go through their friendship, pretending everything was okay when he was screaming on the inside?

Fuck that. She wasn't the "hope it all works out" type of girl. And Alex wasn't the guy who picked up on subtle hints. Or obvious hints for that matter.

No, a more direct approach was needed. Apparently, she wasn't clear enough in what she wanted. That little error was about to be corrected...now.

With steely determination in her eyes, Monique stepped closer to him; close enough so that a soft, serious tone could deliver her message. With a husky, almost-whisper, she looked him directly in the eye and said, "I need you to listen because I'm gonna be straight up with you so there's no confusion."

Her close proximity, mixed with how she was speaking to him, immediately had his undivided attention. He could smell her, which was a weakness. She didn't wear perfume at the gym, but her natural aroma was intoxicating to him. Even her sweat made his heartbeat faster.

She reached out and touched his chest but didn't break the gaze. With the same tone, she said, "That night at the bridge, I told you I wanted to date you. You remember that?"

"Yeah, but..."

She put her finger to his lips to tell him to stop speaking. He took her que, so she smiled and continued, "Well, I don't just wanna date you, Lexxy. I wanna be your girl, and I want you to be my man."

His stunned silence -- as well as the mouth-agape look of shock on his face -- was his only response. He didn't know what to say because he felt like he was ambushed by a Vietcong militia of feelings.

If he wasn't wide awake, he'd swear he was dreaming. This moment had played in his head over the past few months. How often had he imagined her saying the very words that just left her mouth?

But he knew that was a dream. Even after her confession, he somehow expected that she'd return to the default of their relationship. There was no way she'd waste another moment like he had, secretly pining away until the pain went away. She was far too beautiful, and a girl like her would only be single for as long as she wanted to be.

Besides, he told himself, she didn't really feel that way. She couldn't. The only reason she thought she felt that way was because she was worried about losing him as a friend. You know; him dating and all. She wasn't the only woman in his life anymore, and she felt threatened by that. So, she felt she had to date him to reclaim her status.

Women were territorial like that. She didn't necessarily want him; she just wanted to make sure he left room for her in his life.

That had to be it. At least, that's what he thought. But now, standing here and looking into her eyes as she spoke...

He wasn't so sure.

His mouth stumbled as he tried to respond. After a few failed attempts, he was only able to get out, "Mo...I...uhh..."

"What? Thought I wasn't serious?" she asked, reading his mind. Her soft lips smiled slightly, as if him doubting her was adorable.

"Kinda." He admitted sheepishly.

"Well, I am. I know that I took you for granted before. I should've been honest with myself a long time ago instead of keeping you in a safe box. I was scared to admit what I was feeling because I couldn't stand the thought of losing you. We were so perfect, and I thought that if we took that step, and things didn't work out..."

She realized she was getting more emotional as she talked. Her voice was getting elevated, and she was grabbing onto his shirt. After a pause to take a deep breath and calm down, she continued, "I realize how much of a dumbass I was, Lexxy. I took you for granted and did the very thing I was trying to avoid. I risked losing you. Now, you're dating Cameron and I have to accept that."

Shaking her head, she went on, "But it doesn't mean that I have to like it. I won't make trouble for you, and you won't have to worry about losing me as a friend. That's all I can promise you. I'm not gonna stay silent on how I feel about you. You will know exactly what I want for us, and you'll have to be with her knowing that. Furthermore..."

She stepped in just a little closer to him. Her eyes danced over his face as a small smile adorned her lips.

"I believe you feel the same way about me that I feel about you. I can see it every time you look at me. Even now, as we're talking, I see it. When you finally decide to take what we both know you really want -- I'll be here. Waiting...for you. Is that clear enough for you?"

The look on his face told her that he heard her with crystal clarity. She leaned in and gently kissed him on the cheek before turning and walking off. She made sure to put an extra switch in her step, letting him see all that he was turning down to be with...whatever-that-bitch's-name-was.

All he could do was stand there utterly flabbergasted and watch her ass disappear into the locker room.

***

That conversation with Monique messed with Alex days after it happened. He replayed it over and over inside of his head.

It was surreal for him. Her words, her scent, her eyes, her smile; all that set against the background of the gym. It was straight out of a dream; one that he dared not entertain in real life.

He needed to talk to someone about it, but he only had two close friends. One of them was obviously a no go for that conversation, as she was who the conversation was about. So, he decided to call his other one.

Too late he realized that was a mistake. Greg was as incapable of being impartial as Monique would've been.

"Dude, are you seriously asking which one you should choose? Hmm...let's see: which one? The smoking hot Amazonian queen, or the kinda cute girl from America's Best? You're right, Alex! Tough choice!"

With a huff, Alex tried to chime in, "It's not that simple. It's not all about looks. There's more to this than..."

"Okay..." Greg cut him off impatiently. "...let's go about this from another angle. You've known Star Wars chick for more than a year now. How long have you known the eye-glasses chick?"

"Dude, they have names..."

Ignoring him, Greg jumped back in. "No matter which way you go, Monique is the logical choice. I don't understand why it's so hard for you. If this was me, I woulda already tapped that!"

Alex sighed. No matter what, Monique would always win in Greg's mind. From the moment she walked into the store, she had a fan in him. Besides being jet-engine hot, he saw her as karma trying to set things right for Alex after Summer Fitzpatrick shit on him.

His friend just wanted him to be happy. Alex appreciated that. But Greg couldn't help him here.

The conversation didn't last too much longer. It gradually switched to other benign topics, like RPG games and the new VR headset that was coming out in a couple of months. Alex told a white lie of his dad calling to give him an excuse to get off the phone, and the two friends hung up.

Alex sat at the desk in his bedroom and sighed loudly. That sigh turned into a groan. With a final thought, he grabbed his car keys and walked out the door.

***

"UNCLE ALEX!" Brianna squealed when she saw him walking in. Her face lit up and she came bounding across the room to greet him.

Alex scooped his niece up into a hug and kissed her cheek. "Hey Brie Brie! Where's your mom?"

"She's in her room."

He gave her another kiss before putting her down and walking down the hallway towards the bedrooms. When he got to the master, he gently rapped on the slightly ajar door.

"Come in."

Instead of going in, he decided to be a smartass as rhetorically ask, "You decent? You and Darius ain't in there making another kid, are you?"

"I told you to come in, dipshit. Would I do that if my husband were balls-deep?"

He grimaced disgustedly before opened the door and let himself in. He took a seat at the foot of her bed and asked, "Did you have to put that way?"

"Ask stupid questions, get stupid answers." She said dismissively.

She was sitting up with her back against the headboard; her legs outstretched in front of her. She had a pensive look on her face and was furiously tapping away on the laptop that was in front of her.

Curiously, he asked, "Homework?"

Without stopping, she said, "Yeah. Got a paper due at midnight." After a couple more clacks on the keyboard, she looked up at him, put her glasses on top of her head, and asked, "So, what's up? What brings you out here?''

"Nothing. I can't just visit my fav sis?"

She finally paused, and a cynical eyebrow arch foretold her skepticism.

With a chuckle, he said, "Okay fine. You got me. I may have come here for a reason."

"Uh-huh."

"I need some advice. You know...womanly advice."

She looked at him for a second. With a knowing nod, she said, "Okay...out with it. Which one of your little girlfriends brought you here? The cutie with the baby face? Or is it that sexy little bombshell my husband is secretly crushing on?"

"Am I that obvious?" He asked. However, what she said fully dawned on him and he quickly changed course with, "Wait...what? Darius has a crush on Mo?"

"Yeah. He thinks she's hot." She said with a nonchalant shrug.

It was kind of staggering that Darius would even look at Mo like that. He was married. To his sister!

Then again, most guys looked at her with at least some kind of appreciation in their eyes. The fact that Darius found Mo attractive was pretty much a non-issue. The bigger surprise, however, was Sarah's nonchalant matter-of-fact attitude about it.

Curiously, he asked, "It doesn't bother you? You know...him checking out other women?"

An impish grin on her lips made her look devilish as she said, "What can I say? My man has taste. I mean..." She waved her hand over her body and finished with, "...look who he married."

"A corny little white girl with a thing for black guys?"

"Shut up!" she playfully hissed as she threw a pillow at him, which he caught. "You're one to talk! I've seen the way you look at Mo. And what's that cute little name she calls you? Lexxy Poo? Her little Lexxy-kins?"

"Screw you."

This time, it was her turn to slap away the pillow that was hurled in her direction. As she did, she giggled and added, "You'd better be glad I love you, little bro. If I didn't, I'd be trying to talk Mo into a threesome with me and Darius."

Alex's face scrunched up into a look of horror. "What?!"

"Hell yeah!"

He groaned as he started slapping himself in the forehead.

"What the hell are you doing?" She asked.

"Trying to get that horrible image outta my head!"

She laughed aloud as she took pleasure in her younger brother's discomfort. Piling onto it, she jokingly added, "You know how much I love Oreos..."

"Ewww, Sarah! Stop it! You're such a freak! Since when are you bi?"

Showing no shame, she simply retorted, "You don't even know the half of it."

Luckily, she left it at that. Anything more, and Alex would've needed shock therapy to get his brain right again.

In a more serious, yet curious tone, she asked, "So...is she the reason why you're here?"

"It's both of them, actually."

With a look of pride on her face, she gave him a playful shove and said, "Look at you! Playa, Playa!"

"Shut up! It's not like that. Mo and I are just friends."

"Right. And me and Darius are just roommates."

"For real!" he defended himself against her sarcasm. "We've never even kissed."

Surprised, she asked, "Really? You mean, you guys have never..." She made the motion of sex using her fingers. When he shook his head, her surprise expression became even more so.

"Wow." She said, a bit awestruck. "Well, no offense bro, but you two don't look like just friends. Don't act like it either. I saw you when you brought her to dinner a couple of weeks ago. There is a lot more there than two buds spending time together."

Thinking about it, he couldn't help but to see her point.

"Well, there IS some history there." He acquiesced, however added, "But I don't think there's a romantic future for us."

"Oh yeah? Why not?"

He shrugged, trying to make it appear more blasé than he felt. His face, though, wouldn't cooperate with that gesture of indifference.

He released a brooding sigh. "Mo's just...I don't know..."

Sarah looked at her little brother closely, and it was like she read his mind. Sometimes, his sister's astute insight surprised him. It was why she was studying to be a psychologist.

Finishing his thoughts, she completed the rest of his sentence with, "What? Too pretty?"

His first instinct was to blanche at that; deny it held any relevance. But he couldn't. Those two words were like daggers, shooting into a target of his deepest insecurities.

"I see how the guys at the gym look at her; how they look at me when I'm with her. We don't match. I'm not rich, handsome, or tall. Guys like me don't get girls like her."

"Isn't that her choice, though?"

He gave another shrug before looking away. "Of course, it is. But what happens when she gets tired of being with the nerd? When she gets a hankering to be with the type of guy she normally goes for? What happens to me then?"

Sarah's expression turned empathetic. "She's not Summer, Alex."

"Why does everyone keep saying that!?" He asked, not hiding his exasperation at the constant re-emergence of her name. "I know she's not Summer! I don't need to be constantly reminded of her."

Sarah allowed silence to fall between them. Alex cooled down from his little outburst and shot her an apologetic look. Finally, he got real and truthfully said, "She's a beautiful girl; one who's dated...you know...top guys."

"And?"

"And...I'm...well...you know..."

"An awesome guy who'll treat her right?" she interrupted.

He scoffed a little. "Yeah. I'm also the short, white, dork who works at Best Buy."

"And yet...she likes you." Sarah reminded him. "Despite dating all those top guys...she likes you. What does that say about you?"

He let that hang there for a second, thinking on it. When he finally answered, he said, "I don't know."

Sarah let out a sigh but didn't push that any further. She hated the way her little brother looked down on himself. Even now, after he'd spent a year working out and getting in shape, he still saw himself as that skinny little kid from high school who no one noticed.

However, her fear for Alex was that he was right about Monique. Monique was exceptionally beautiful. Sure, she had a cute pet name for him, and looked at him with loving eyes, but would that last if the two of them actually got together? It would be bad enough dealing with racism that came with the stigma of interracial dating, but what about the disparity of beauty? Next to her, Alex would always look like the one who was "out of his league".

"So...why are you here?" she asked curiously. "It seems like you have your mind made up about what to do and who you should be with. What advice did you come here for?"

Alex let out a breath, slumped his shoulders, and said, "Because I can't stop having feelings for Mo. Cameron is the logical choice; the one I should be with. Me and her match. But with Mo...I don't know. She makes me feel..."

He let his sentence drop off from there, but he'd said enough. Nodding knowingly, Sarah said, "You love her, don't you?"

He didn't answer directly, but he didn't really have to. His face said it all. With a sigh, he said, "It was so much easier when I didn't stand a chance with her. I actually got used to living in the friendzone."

"Did you?"

"Yeah. The weather was great, housing was affordable..."

"You're such a dufus..."

"...And then, BAM!" he continued, ignoring her interruption. "She ups and drops this on me. Just when things start turning around for me, she ruins it by confusing me."

She knew her brother, and how he often used humor to balm over a conversation that was threatening to make him "feel". Reaching out and putting her hand on his knee, Sarah said, "You know Alex, if you're always shielding yourself against pain, you also shield yourself against pleasure."

With a small snicker, he asked, "What Chinese restaurant did you get that fortune cookie from?"

"The one up your ass."

"Sounds like a shitty place to eat." He quipped, his eyebrows bouncing. "Get it? Because it's up my ass, and..."

"I got it." She cut him off with a dry sigh.

See? Humor.

However, despite his jokes, he heard his sister. She was right, and he knew it. He liked Cameron; a lot actually. She was a great girl and didn't deserve to be anyone's second choice. It's one thing to choose her because the two of them would be great for one another. It's an entirely different thing to do so because he was scared of his feelings for Mo.

***

In the weeks that followed, things between the love trio continued as it had. Alex continued to date Cameron and didn't allow himself to over-think about what it all meant. He just decided to live in the moment, have fun, and see where everything went.