Life, Love, and a Career Ch. 06

Tough Love, an Awakening, Finding a Greater Love

We thank you for joining us on the continuing rewrite of the continuing journey of Beth and Kate. Again we do have the approval and support of the original author. As in life, in some fictional stories a career does evolve. The employment of our two MC's does make a difference in the story long term. We ask you to understand and support the backstory. We need the love of those close to us and tough love of others to see clearly.

Christmas 88

The holidays are always a joyous time of the year for us. It is the time when we are able to connect totally as a family. This year we developed closer relationships with others and we even got to meet Dan's family. Mom hosted Dan's parents for dinner on the 23rd. They seemed like a nice couple in their mid-fifties.

There were comments about Kate and my relationship but mother in loving fashion made sure everyone was aware of Kate and I and her support of our relationship. I beamed with pride and love for my mother as she never backed down and stood proud with us.

Christmas morning was a wonderful affair with Kate, Mom and I. We enjoyed a light breakfast and coffee; afterwards we exchanged a few small gifts. As had become a recent tradition, after we opened presents and chatted a bit. Afterwards we returned to our rooms for a short nap, all a little tired from midnight Mass and waking early. Dan and Chelle would come at 4:00 for dinner.

Don't ask me why, I am well aware we are crazy; it's just what we do.

I curled up in bed waiting for Kate to come in from the bathroom. Kate came into the bedroom wearing a beautiful, floor length red robe. She had her back to me. I could not see what she was wearing underneath. She closed the bedroom door and flipped off the light turning towards me only the minimal light that the curtains allowed into the room. Allow me to see the frame of her body as she walks towards the bed.

She carefully peeled back her robe. She was wearing it to reveal the gift that she had for me. Her girl cock never looked so beautiful. As I moved forward towards her she shook her head stopping, asking me to stay. Carefully she crawled onto the bed gently pressing my body flat, her lips pressing into mine, her legs astride, straddling me and lowering herself, kissing me deeper, her breasts pressing into mine.

It was one of the most erotic feelings I have ever had. The moment she slipped her 'girl cock' into me. She was loving and gentle, and slow with her motions just a few inches with each easy movement. When our mounds met each other we paused, breaking our kisses, each breathing deeply.

"Miss" she said, "The love and affection I have for you can only be shown in me giving you the greatest gift I have. I have given myself to you fully, heart, mind, soul and now body. I share with you my all, wanting you to never be unsatisfied with our love and affection."

In very slow and delicate movements, Kate and I started making love. Our fingers and hands constantly touch the other, our lips rarely separated from the other's skin. My legs opened wide, wrapped around her pulling her tight to me.

She kissed her lips to my ear and started whispering her love for me all the while quickening her pace, thrusting deeper inside as her pelvis bumped into me, my arms now wrapped tightly around her.

I closed my eyes seeing stars, I felt my walls tighten on her girl cock, my breath quickened, and I begged her to for, faster, harder. Who was this person?

Then suddenly my world exploded! I felt my stomach tighten, my nipples hardened and a gush of fluid spraying from me. Then darkness.

Soft kisses on my cheeks, gentle fingers touching my skin, a damp feeling on my forehead. Kate's voice whispering her love to me. My legs rubbery, my arms flopped to my sides as I continued to hear Kate's words and expressions of love.

I turned my head seeing my beautiful lover smiling down, her beautiful blue eyes focused on me. My heart slowing down, she kissed my cheek whispering her eternal love for me.

An hour later I walked from the shower, gathered our sheets and walked to the first floor only to be met with cheers and jeers from Mom, Chelle and Dan.

"Ohhh hush you three!" I exclaimed as I turned down the basement steps to the laundry room.

January '89

Ken started the meeting by sharing with us that he was interviewing a new cold caller by the name of Derrick and that he could be starting in a few weeks. He and Liz were going to speak with him and then another team member which Derrick had requested.

I thought to myself, Oh great, here we go again. Derrick would be the third resume screener in the past two months. The first two came to us as referrals from Ken's network, none from the school visits we made.

Liz and I shared with Ken that we weren't comfortable with anyone we had met with to this point. He was appreciative.

The first, Ashley, never came back to work on her second day. The second, Allan, was scatterbrained, so aloof that it was comical. Liz would joke about running out of red pens getting him to understand what information was missing on the call sheets. Thank god neither came from my alma mater.

When describing Derrick to us he said he was different from the previous cold callers, he was more mature. Now it clicked. A few weeks ago when I was enjoying a coffee break, Ken handed me a resume asking for me to review and determine what position would be best for this candidate. As was my practice I highlighted the major skills and number of years of experience, then looked at soft skills and listed them and then reviewed academics and volunteer work.

About fifteen minutes later I walked to Ken's office with my notes and answered that the candidate was a 'Jack of all trades and a master at none'. I saw a background in project coordination, some mid-level management, logistics, supply chain management, some budgeting, a BA in Management with a minor in Military Science.

As the meeting adjourned, I inquired to Ken about the resume I reviewed, he just smiled. Then Liz, who had stayed back, chimed in to inform me if he was hired, that my 'sorry ass' was training him.

"Wait? Me? Why me? I have contracts to close, candidates to chase down and I am too busy to waste my time on training a caller."

Ken looked at me, simply replied "Thanks for doing this Beth."

They both stood and walked out of the room smiling the whole way. For some reason their comments just set me off, putting me in a bad mood. I was snarky and short to everyone I spoke with. I had to bite my tongue when on a call with a client. I finally lost my Irish temper and got pissed when the fax machine ran out of toner. I needed that fax printed so I could sign another contract and send the executed contract back. I walked back to my cubicle mumbling under my breath.

My phone rang, fuck, Ken was calling me. "Yes Sir"

"Beth, come to my office." It was a statement not a request. I hung up the phone.

"Fuck" I screamed.

I really wasn't in the mood to get my ass chewed. I knew I was wrong but dammit I didn't want to be associated with someone who would potentially fail. I resigned myself to the fact that I deserved to get my ass chewed as I knocked on the door.

Ken waved me in and signaled me to close the door. It was worse than expected as Monica sat in one of the office chairs.

"No need to sit, this won't take long."

Ken's tone was not friendly. In fact it was a tone of voice I wasn't at all familiar with.

"You are doing well, better than expected. But as the owner ..."

Monica cleared her throat; Ken looked at her and continued, "As the majority owner of this company, whether I say something with a smile on my face or in a direct tone like this, I expect my employees to follow my guidance. Understood?"

"Yes sir, my apologies. It will not happen again."

Monica stood and walked over to me. "Beth, this is not something that I want anyone here to know outside of the three of us," she looked at Ken and firmly continued, "But because I can as the other owner." Ken's expression changed slightly.

"Derrick is special to me. He is family, not our child, but family and he need a win."

She went on to tell me that he was a US Marine Corps veteran joining the Marines after college in 1982. 'Fuck, I thought to myself. This dude is older than me.'

Monica continued, "He served honorably and decided after six years he was done with his service but has been struggling."

She refused to go into detail but Derrick was involved in some military operations in Beirut and again in Libya early in his career. I was to train him and develop him as April and Liz did for me.

I felt like a two-bit piece of shit. This was a lesson in humility and I failed miserably and I was deserving of this ass chewing. I felt like crap and dropped my chin to my chest.

I took a deep breath composing myself then looked at Ken and then Monica, "Sir, Ma'am, I am so sorry. I am clueless why I responded like that and really have no excuse. Please forgive me." I felt the tears welling up in my eyes.

They both nodded, Ken picked up his phone and dialed a number. I wasn't able to hear who he was speaking with but he confirmed breakfast on Tuesday at 8:30. He hung up and turned towards me.

"Sir, I sincerely apologize I still do not know." I choked up and started crying. My hands started to shake, I felt weak in my knees like I was going to collapse. I started to shake, everything looked blurry and I was extremely dizzy.

I heard Monica call my name, and then heard Ken make another call. All I heard was "Come in here?" He hung up then dialed another number.

I started breathing faster and faster. All I could think was he calling Joe in here to fire me. Oh God, I was in trouble, I panicked. In the background, I heard Ken's voice; his tone was higher there was excitement in his voice.

I couldn't hear very well, Monica was trying to talk to me, Ken was screaming at me!

Then the dam burst, my hands came to my face, I fell to my knees shaking. My breathing turned uncontrollable and I started to panic! I didn't want to be fired! Tears flooding from my eyes. I heard the office door open then close.

And that was it. My knees buckled, my legs gave out and I collapsed to the floor.

Monica moved quickly, kneeling next to me on the carpeted floor. I felt her wrap her arms around me.

I then heard Kate on the opposite side of me, talking to me. They both were trying to get me to calm down. She was whispering in my ear. Calming words and soft whispers.

I heard Ken, "Hey I am sending Kate and Beth out for something. They will be gone the remainder of the day." I heard him hang up the phone then screamed, "God damnit"

My breathing quickened, I continued to panic silently crying.

"Please sir, don't fire me,"

He cursed again.

Monica screamed, "Kenneth that's enough!"

I turned crimson red in embarrassment. I started apologizing again. They helped me stand and then had me sit in an office chair.

"Listen" I could still hear disappointment and a renewed sternness in Ken's voice.

"No one is being fired, damnit! Just go home and clear your head. Get your fucking head on straight or don't come back tomorrow! Understand?"

He looked at Kate, "I don't know what the fuck just happened and I don't care how or if it is possible to fix her but get her out of here."

He raised his voice, "Dammit! Erase the last few hours from her fucking mind then bring the real Beth back tomorrow." He said.

He looked at me. "I don't know what the hell you did with the real Beth but I don't know who this fucking imposter is but get out of here. Bring the real fucking Beth back tomorrow.

"Kate, get out the fuck of here!"

Kate and Monica were quiet in their movements, they helped me stand for the chair, then Kate opened the door, Monica nodded at me and said, "Good cop" then looked at Ken and said, "Bad cop." She looked deep in my eyes and told me to relax, to go home, get some rest and not to worry. "See you tomorrow." She said.

As we were walking to the car, I realized I was in no condition to drive. Kate said she would drive us home and take care of me. This time she walked to the passenger side and opened the door for me. She stood in front of the car entrance looking at me and told me if I didn't kiss her in public right now she would make me stand there until I did. I could see she was serious. Then she winked, smiled and then said, "Now Miss."

I kissed her, hugged her and as I broke the kiss I started crying, uncontrollably crying. Kate helped me into the car, closed the door and drove us home.

It was about 1:00 in the afternoon when we got home. I ran up the stairs slamming our bedroom door closed. I didn't have the strength to change clothes, I just collapsed. My emotions were all over the place. I was stressed and could feel my chest starting to tighten and my breathing becoming more rapid.

Suddenly I was having problems thinking straight, I was having problems keeping my feelings in check, and I had no clue why I was doing this. I felt heartbroken, I felt lost and I felt confused. I do not know why it seemed like everything around me was coming crashing down. Was it so simple?

I realized I was afraid to fail in training a new person and of failing. I didn't want to take on a new teammate and be responsible for training them for the potential that they wouldn't work out and it would be a reflection on me. I didn't want to fail. I couldn't fail.

Suddenly my heart started beating extremely fast, I couldn't catch my breath, I was feeling dizzy, I screamed and everything faded to black.

I woke up lying on the bed. Mom was on a chair next to the bed and Kate was sitting on the bed holding my hand. There was soft instrumental music playing in the background.

I started sobbing and asked out loud, "Mom, Kate, what is wrong with me?"

"Nothing at all dear, you had a bad day at work, we all do." Mom responded. "But you overreacted. You young lady allowed your ego to get in the way of reality." Mom was being stern with me, which I deserved.

"You thought you were too important and failed to realize just who you are. An employee, not a boss." She finished.

Kate stood up from the bed and mentioned she would make some tea and would be back. As she left she pulled the door closed.

Mom and I just chatted for a good amount of time holding my hands. She was calming, reassuring but told me to pick myself up by the bootstraps, screw my head on tight. She emphasized that until I owned my own business I needed to follow the rules. I needed to do what I was told to do and stop acting like a spoiled brat.

"Me? A spoiled brat. I think not!" She just looked at me as her eyebrows arched.

I heard Kate outside the bedroom door asking for help as her hands were full. Mom jumped up and opened the door. Kate came in with a few cups of tea on a tray.

"Thank you Frances." Setting the tray down on the dresser she handed mom and I a cup of tea. Still standing she spoke, "Beth" her voice cracked, she sounded scared.

"I love you and god knows how much you mean to me. I do not know where I would be without you."

She looked down at the floor, "Probably married to some sweaty, hairy man with zero satisfaction in my life." Then she looked at me. "I chose you because of how respectful, strong, powerful, intelligent and resourceful you are." She paused, "You haven't been lately and certainly not today."

She stood tall, and looked at me with kindness in her eyes, "I chose Beth, the Beth I knew in school, the Beth that was there during the stress and the troubles. The woman that saved me from that asshole in the ladies room."

I could see her kindness turn slightly, her voice cracking again." Where is she? Where did she go? Your mother is right; you have been a spoiled brat as of late, not my loving fiancée."

I could see the tears in her eyes. Walking over to me, she held out her left hand making certain I saw her engagement ring.

"Where is this woman? The woman I need, the woman I love? Where is the woman that proposed?" She bent down and kissed my lips.

"Find her and never let her leave, ever again. I can't go on without her. One day she will be the mother of my child, of our future child. Find her because I don't see her right now."

Kate stood and walked to the desk. She picked up a book and tossed it on the bed, a self-help book something about 'Seven Habits.

She then turned away, took the empty tray and walked out of the bedroom closing the door. My mom looked at me, nodded her head and told me I was the only one that could fix this. She also stood and walked out leaving me to my thoughts.

Sometime later I got out of bed looking out the window and I saw the sun lower in the distant horizon. I stripped down, and went to take a shower. Out of the shower I put on a t-shirt and some panties, nothing else. I wanted to refresh my brain and I imagined starting with what I knew would help.

Back in our bedroom, I turned on the CD player, dropped in a disc and cranked the speakers. Bob Sieger, "American Storm" cranked in the room ...

"An American storm"

The music faded. Then track two.

"Stood there boldly ...

I pictured my father in my mind, how strong of a man he was. How he taught me to be confident, strong. The phrase he used was "steadfast in my beliefs." I started swaying to the music. I kept picturing him talking to me.

I was just a young high school girl but he always spoke to me like I was his only focus and as a mature adult. I missed him so much. I wanted to be strong like him. I listened to the music. I was hearing the words, the meanings.

"I was 18 ..."

I continued swaying, my feet moving slowly. The rhythm in my mind, then humming, slowly my lips moved along, following the chorus, then the next verse. I started singing, swaying, as the chorus hit a second time, I turned to the CD player and turned the volume as high as it would go.

I was listening to the words, listening in my head, "Like a Rock" repeating, reflecting, and knowing what my dad would want. He would guide me. I missed him, I needed him but yet he was in my soul, my heart.

"Like a ..."

That's it. I am her rock. I am hers, she is mine, and I am her rock. Wait! No, my mind finally clicked. I am the foundation for our family, her and me. Tears flowed, good tears flowed. Music has always been my savior. Music has always been my resource and therapy.

Music is where I disappear when I was craving help; music was my connection to my dad. As the song finished, I hit repeat and played it again, then again, then again. After the fourth time it played my mom, who must have been knocking, came into the room. She looked at me; I looked at her, smiled and walked to her giving her a hug.

"I love you Mom and I will always love you and Dad. I am sorry but I see it now."

Breaking the hug she kissed my cheek then whispered in my ear, "Your wife" I heard, then she nodded, "Yes, your wife is downstairs worrying about you." She straightened up, took a deep breath then said, "You must act, now. Go!"

I ran out of the room and down the steps turned into the hallway and into the family room. I knelt in front of her, taking her hands and softly said, "I am back my love. I am back. I will never, ever, leave you afraid, cold and lonely again. I am so sorry, so so sorry."

I stood taking hold of her hands and pulled her to me kissing Kate deeply, holding her tightly, stroking her hair, and just hugging her.

"I found your wife; I know where I am, where I need to be, and where we are going. Kate, dear I am so sorry I have been a train wreck. Please know you are my rock also. You hold me up." I kissed her softly on the forehead, "Your rock, your wife, your lover and Miss is here."