All Comments on 'Live-in Dominatrix'

This is a technically good story. You tick many of the boxes of what a Mistress and slave relationship could be. How she treats him, what he thinks of her. But it is cold. It is emotionless. There is no joy in this story. No affection. Certainly no love. No human beings could exist together as a couple in this way. I hope your future stories have emotions and some warmth in them.

Dear Unknown

Thanks for your constructive and useful feedback!

Greatly appreciate it 👍

Greets, LaCalva

Further to my comment, I do think that if you rewrote this but added warmth, respect, friendship and even love between them then it would be a great story. He can still have bitten off more than he can chew by asking her to become his Domme. He can still find himself in a situation where his fantasy becomes a harsh reality, where the friend and woman he loves becomes his cruel 24/7 Mistress. But at the moment it is just cold and it reads that she is just using him for money and his property. It is an abusive relationship but not in a 'good' BDSM way. I say these things to be constructive as I think you have something here. Maybe use the core of this idea - it is a good one - to write another one along similar lines with the same general idea of a man getting back in touch with past female friend or lover and asking her to become his Mistress?

I agree with what the previous commenter wrote. The impression one gets from the story is not that the man has gained a companion, but that a selfish woman takes advantage of him in a way that is off-turning and destructive. Ungrateful people are never good people and her inconsiderate behaviour spoiled a story that could have been very interesting. The narrator’s character also doesn’t seem to be likely to give up everything he has worked for and throw away his life.

A lot of work and effort went into the creation of this story. I enjoyed it. If you wish to revisit or start anew, think about chemistry. -M

This story baffles me. I'm a very open minded person but I can't see any reason anyone would subject themselves to this let alone want it. This only remotely makes sense as the fantasy of a true sadistic psychopath. Never the less I enjoyed it. Not because I found it erotic but because I found it morbidly fascinating like watching a slow motion train wreck. I also think it makes a good cautionary tell for any Ms out there that seriously want to live out a fantasy like this. Anyone who has any care for you won't want a full slave 24/7, especially long term. Giving complete submission long term to anyone is very dangerous and the person who accepts it is definitely a psychopath with a God complex that will likely break you down until there's nothing left than kill you or make you kys for their amusement.