Loving Sisters

Joanne's story

My sister and I were always close. Sonja was my big sister and protected me and taught me the ways of the world - at least some of them. Even after we both married, we lived in the same town, shared many friends, and were counselors to each other. We love each other deeply, and that's why the recent events have been so difficult. It's because I love her so much that I secretly fucked her husband Jack.

My name is Joanne. I'm 51 now and Sonja is 54. Jack is 55. So, we're mature suburbanites that have enjoyed a good life. Jack is an executive at a local printing equipment company and Sonja has been teaching literature courses at the county community college for many years. I am a (successful) realtor and really enjoy matching people and their situations with homes in the area. Our mother was an exceptionally beautiful woman, and we daughters were lucky enough to inherit many of her attributes.

My husband, Dwayne, died suddenly three years ago in a car accident, leaving me suddenly alone and lonely after 19 years of marriage. We had enjoyed a very good marriage, emotionally and physically. We kept each other entertained, especially in bed. Unfortunately, we never had children, which made his absence even worse. He left a huge emptiness in my life - and in my bed. It was only through Sonja's and Jack's daily support that I got through the first months after Dwayne's death.

I've learned to live in my new life without hourly and daily reminders of Dwayne's absence. But, I still stroke the sheet on his side of the bed as I fall asleep each night. Yes, the pain diminishes over time, but it never goes away.

Sonja and Jack have one daughter, Lizzy, now completing her masters in Psychology. Too bad I can't talk with her about her parents, and my relationship with them. I could use some outside advice. Maybe someday.

Sonja and I have always been open with each other and our personal lives. She shared in my excitement and anxiety when I had my first period. I got graphic descriptions of her first sexual encounters - and always compared those with my friend's stories. I told her how funny I felt on my second date with Dwayne when he French kissed me and tried to feel my breast. We both agreed he must be special - and must be watched carefully. She was appalled when, only a few weeks later, he took my cherry in the back of his car. At that point she hadn't yet got to third base with anyone.

As adults, we still shared most of our personal lives with each other - most but not all. Our catholic schooling was more firmly imbedded in her psyche than in mine, so she has struggled under the "pleasure is a sin" mentality. Fortunately, I was able to get out from under that and learned that pleasure is pleasure. Because of that difference, I have always been more adventurous in my sex life. Dwayne and I experimented with positions, toys, and moderate BDSM. We were never swingers, but were totally uninhibited with each other.

Sonja, on the other hand, enjoyed sex with Jack, but in only specific forms. Missionary and cowgirl were fine, but from the rear doggie-style was not dignified. Their sex was always love-making - never fucking. At some point, Jack got her to accept cunnilingus, though she thought it was disgusting. But once she experienced having multiple orgasms in one session, she became okay with him going down on her. However, giving oral back to Jack never happened as far as I know. She wouldn't watch porn or consider using sex toys.

I always felt sorry for Jack. She told me about the many times he suggested something new and she usually responded with "OK, go ahead and do that if you want, I'll just lie here and wait till you're done." Jack is smart enough to understand that message. She really does love him and wants to please him. But her own inhibitions have consistently blocked her from experimenting. I guess Jack really loves her since he has lived with a very limited sex life for 22 years now. I have seen no evidence that he has gone elsewhere for more sophisticated sexual satisfaction.

Their loving-but-vanilla sex life would have continued till they died except for Mother Nature's intervention. When Jack was about 52, he started experiencing erectile dysfunction (ED). That's earlier than most men, but not really rare. Sonja told me about it and how badly he felt when he couldn't satisfy her. Of course, she also felt frustrated. He tried Viagra and Cialis and they gave him another couple years of good performance, but then seemed to lose their power.

She told me that he could get hard when they played in the shower together, but would lose it quickly when they got into bed. He still gets "morning wood", often waking with a really hard erection. But it wouldn't last while he tried to wake her and get her in the mood. Given those symptoms, his urologist said that since he was able to physically get hard, there must be some psychological reason for his impotence. That diagnosis is what eventually drove Jack to talk with me.

Dwayne and Jack had always been close extensions of the intimacy between Sonja and me. We've all known each other for over 20 years and have seen the best and worst of each of us. He could correctly assume that Sonja and I had discussed his ED problem, so he needn't be embarrassed to discuss it with me. But I didn't expect the conversation that ensued.

After dinner one Sunday, while Sonja was doing the dishes, Jack asked if he and I could have a confidential talk without Sonja. I was surprised, but agreed - the first time I would ever keep such a secret from my sister.

He asked to come over and talk with me at my house sometime that week. We agreed on Tuesday afternoon since my schedule is very flexible and he could leave work without having to explain anything to Sonja. I was uneasy about the idea of hiding something from her, but knew that Jack must have a good reason to ask for it.

When he arrived on Tuesday, he immediately asked for a drink. It was clear that he was anxious and needed some additional courage to speak with me. I just sat and waited for him to open the conversation.

"Joanne, this is very hard for me," he began, "I know you and Sonja share just about everything and I hope that you can help me with a difficult problem with her. It will be very hard for you, but I ask that you promise me that you will not share this conversation with her."

That got my attention and concern. I struggled to reply. "I can certainly keep a secret from her if I believe it won't hurt her. But if it's something that will cause her pain, then I can't make that promise."

He considered that and replied, "I understand. I guess I have no other choice but to trust your judgement. I hope you will see that this will be helpful to her and not harm her."

He drew a long breath and said, "I assume she has told you about my ED problem and how our sex life has effectively ended. That is a great frustration for both of us. I can still pleasure her with my tongue, but everything else either doesn't work or she is unwilling to try. It was very difficult for me to face this limitation of my body. I was starting to accept it when my doctor said the largest part of the problem is probably psychological, not physical. That gave me hope that I could somehow beat it."

"In the past few months I have tried to understand what psychological factors were the cause and how I might overcome them. I didn't tell Sonja, but I have been seeing a therapist once a week for months. Through our discussions, we have come to realize that at my age and in my condition, I needed more stimulation before I can become fully aroused, both mentally and physically."

"I assume you know from conversations with Sonja that our sex life was very monotonous. For over 20 years we have never experimented, never played around, never changed anything. I have always enjoyed our sex, but in plain terms it was vanilla. When I was younger, that was enough to get me aroused and hard. But now, my body and mind need something more to get sufficient arousal to get hard enough for penetration. I can still masturbate when I'm stimulated by erotic stories or porn films."

I was shocked to hear Jack being so explicit in his terms and concepts. We had always been close, but not that close.

He continued: "I'm asking for your help to convince Sonja that we must experiment, do different things and overcome her sexual inhibitions. With sufficient stimulation, I may again be able to give both of us full sexual satisfaction. Do you think you could help me with that?"

Then I understood his desire for secrecy and I felt empathy for his situation. I was quite aware of my sister's inhibitions and the difficulty of trying to overcome them. He had been asking her for more variations for years with little result. Now he must get through to her to force a change. I knew that would be very difficult. He needed to appreciate how hard that would be.

"Jack, I love you and Sonja and will do whatever I can to help, but I'm not sure it's possible. Her beliefs and habits are lifelong. She's been conservative and afraid of change for over 50 years. I know she really loves you and wants to please you, but that hasn't made her change her perceptions of sex in all that time. I'm surprised that you were able to convince her to accept cunnilingus. But of course, that came with its own significant reward for her."

"Yes, I know that." He agreed, "But we must do something. I don't trust myself anymore. I haven't had sex for 6 months now and I find myself staring at the women at work and on the street. A woman at the gym flirted with me last week and I found myself smiling at her and feeling flattered."

I wondered if he was sending a message to Sonja through me. He wasn't threatening to stray, but he was making sure I understood it was possible.

"Exactly what do you have in mind Jack?"

"I was hoping you could talk with her and try to sell the advantages of adventuresome sex. She knows that you have a broader experience so you can speak with authority. She certainly trusts you. Perhaps you could get into a discussion of past sexual exploits. You don't have to suggest she try them, just explain what a great time you had and how it improved your relationship with Dwayne. What do you think?"

I thought back to past conversations with Sonja regarding sex. Early in my marriage I shared some of the exciting new things that Dwayne and I were exploring. I remember her reaction was always a squished up face and "Eeeewwww!" Dwayne taking me over the back of the couch was "Obscene". Giving him a blowjob and my descriptions of how his dick felt in my mouth were "Disgusting". I had learned to simply not discuss sexual matters with my sister. I was sure her attitude would not have mellowed over 20 years, probably just the opposite.

"I can try Jack. But we both know how she is and trying to change her mind about something so basic is not likely to work. She'd trust me to tell the truth, but she still wouldn't like that truth."

Jack dropped his head and murmured: "I don't know what else to do. We have to think of something or I'm going to explode."

I was also out of ideas and suggested we both sit on it and meet again next week to see if we had invented any miraculous solutions. Jack went home depressed.

I knew from my realty experience that there were ways to convince a potential buyer that ugly home features were actually very trendy. That horrible wallpaper making the bathroom feel small could be replaced with fashionable subway tiles and black accents. The house was just three blocks away from a noisy industrial plant, but the school was only one block the other way. Just walking around in a house always reduced the objections they had when they first walked in. Familiarity breeds acceptance. You had to know what the prospect really wanted and convince them that your solution would fulfill that desire. But what did Sonja really want?

I knew that the most important things in her life were Jack and their daughter Lizzy. She would do anything for them. But was it really anything? By the following Tuesday I had the basis of a plan.

"This may seem wild, Jack. But it may work. And it won't hurt much to try. I propose that I start telling Sonja that I've met a man and begun dating him. I'll give sketchy information about him, but say he is a wonderful guy. After a few weeks I'll tell her that we've started having sex. And it will be spectacular sex. I will pretend that I am so excited about the sex that I will ignore her objections and keep telling her my very explicit stories. I will emphasize how satisfied I am in my life because of the great sex. That might get her at least curious, but probably won't change her actions with you."

"Then after a few more weeks I will report how angry and sad I am because I learned that the guy is married. It turns out he really loves his wife, but she is so inhibited in bed that he has gone looking for more excitement in his life. He is a scoundrel of course and I stop seeing him. But I begin to make connections between his situation and yours. I might even go so far as to warn her to get over her inhibitions before you start to stray. What do you think?"

Jack took a full minute to close his mouth. Then another minute to speak. "That's crazy Joanne. She'll never buy that. And besides, that will make her suspicious of me. Why do you think that will work?"

"Because my descriptions of great sex will get her used to the concepts and images of it and that regular people like her sister do stuff like that every day. It normalizes sex acts that she currently thinks are obscene, immoral or disgusting. Then the threat of you looking for more excitement gives her a great motivation to please you and do whatever you ask of her. If you then politely ask her for a new position or fellatio a few times, she may begin to accept that and give it a try. Then it's up to you to make sure the sex is really great for her"

Jack pondered that for a while and slightly smiled. "That might have a chance," he said. "It puts you through a lot of work and a lot of lying to your sister. If she ever learned the truth she would never trust you again. Are you willing to do that?"

Then came my most difficult message to Jack: "Yes, I am willing to do all of that if it can save your sex life and make both of you happier. But there is one very important concept that this whole discussion is based on. That is that getting Sonja to perform lots of new sex acts will be enough stimulation to give you a durable hard-on that will allow great sex for both of you. If the psychological blockage is caused by something other than boring sex, this whole escapade, and its risks to both of us are a waste. Do you understand?"

That stopped him in his tracks. "You're right." He said, "I need to be sure that more stimulation is the real solution. But how the hell can I know that if Sonja doesn't cooperate in the first place? I need to think about this before we do anything."

We agreed to meet on Wednesday of the following week to continue our discussion. I could hear the gears spinning in his head. We both promised to work hard to develop a workable plan. That next meeting was very significant.

"Joanne, I think I have found a way to test whether or not more sexual stimulation can get me hard and keep me hard long enough to satisfy Sonja. Now don't jump on this until I explain the whole thing. The best form of new sexual stimulation would be a different woman, I think..."

"Stop right there Jack. I'm not going to participate in any plan where you have an affair with another woman. I understand your frustration, but our plan is to improve your sex life with Sonja, not someone else."

"Hey, I asked you not to jump before you heard the whole thing. Now be quiet for a minute. A different woman would definitely be very stimulating. And just doing it once would be enough to test the theory of the true cause of my ED. I don't need to have an affair. Just one test. I can do that with an escort. I've been shopping online and there are several very attractive women in the area that can be had for 300 to 500 dollars. That wouldn't be cheating, it's conducting an experiment."

Every conversation with Jack brought new and shocking surprises. Hiring a hooker was very surprising. I didn't think he had ever considered that before. But I had.

During my week of thinking I considered how to present various sex acts to Sonja in a way that got her interested and aroused. My verbal descriptions would be good, but a visual demonstration on video would be best. I couldn't get her to watch a porn film, but I could show off my own thrilling adventures. She would watch if she thought I was trying to brag about my own accomplishments and skills. Sisters have to be polite that way. I could film myself fucking with a man and not show his face. I could probably get any guy off the street ("Hi there, would you like to fuck me?") but that could get complicated and dangerous. But, I could hire a male escort who would be professional both in his actions and in his discretion. Weird that Jack and I had come up with the same solution - but for different purposes.

"No Jack. That would still be cheating. If she found out you hired a hooker it could destroy your marriage. I do understand your methodology, but you need to come up with a better way to test your hypothesis that doesn't include having sex with a stranger."

Poor Jack was dejected. He knew very well that we had to both agree on any solution. He couldn't do anything I objected to, because I would feel obligated to tell Sonja if he did anything "unfaithful." Then I started to explain my brilliant plan to get her used to various sex acts.

"Here's my idea. I think Sonja could be taught that there are lots of very exciting ways to enjoy sexual pleasure that millions of people do every day - without sinning. I can start that process by describing my fictional affair with a new lover. I'd give her lots of juicy, arousing details. But beyond that, I need to show her what those acts are like. I could create my own sex tapes with me and my fictional lover cavorting in bed. My moans and screams on the tape plus my excited running commentary might well plant some ideas and desires in her closed little mind. What do you think?"

Jack was smiling and nodding. "Yeah, I think that might actually have an effect on her. There's only one problem. You can't record your lover on video if he's doesn't really exist."

"Well Jack, I came up with the same idea you did - I'll hire an escort for that job."

That was Jack's turn to be shocked. It took him a minute to collect his thoughts and express disapproval. "Joanne, that's crazy. You can't jump into bed with a stranger just to make a video. It's dangerous and demeaning to you. You deserve to find a new lover in your life, a real one. Not a paid stud. You've never done anything like that in your life"

His words were a bucket of cold water thrown on my sizzling video idea. He's right. I'm not that kind of person. I can't just get intimate with a stranger and lose all of my inhibitions. I would probably be so uncomfortable with a strange man that I couldn't get into my role as sexual animal. I've always loved sex and have been very passionate, both with Dwayne and a few earlier boyfriends. But it was always based on a relationship. I have never done a one night stand or "hooked-up". I was certainly no prude, but I was not a slut either.

I looked up at Jack and our eyes met. We both knew the other was right and had just shot down our best ideas. We both wanted to find a way around the problems. We both understood that the other should never get sexually involved with a stranger. Then it happened.