All Comments on 'Lucky Day Ch. 01'

Very good start. The plot is good and original, and the story is well written. Looking forward to see the rest.

Extremely good story. Quite an original plot. Look forward to chapter two. Randi.

Damn, story is good so far. Cant wait for the second chapter. The writing and display of emotions were really good. No wonder Annie got more angry and bitter with time with how everyone treated Henrys affair as something to just get over. To be honest, Henry was the worst of them all. Treating the whole thing as nothing noteworthy and wanting to carry on a relationship with Kaia even after it was discovered.

what a fucked up mentally ill creature u are cagivawhore!

Well written and realistic (at least at a fiction level). Look forward and hoping that this does not end in a FFM relationship.

This was a hot mess.

Interesting twist, although there were some hints of what was to come. Just hope it doesn't end up in a threesome cliché.

Different. Very different... and I enjoyed it. It certainly helps tremendously when the actual story is backed up by being well constructed and well written. Many thanks for the enjoyment of reading it. Cheers.

Can’t wait for next chapter. I can see this going in at least three different directions, maybe four.

I very much enjoy your writing. You make it easy to become immersed in the story. Thank you.

Well....As usual, the author has written a story that is well word-smithed, the only exception being a schlocky section that begins with: "She fell to her knees in the classic prayer mode. "Annie, I beg of you, please give me a chance to make up for my mistake." She fell forward onto her elbows. I am beseeching, please. I am about to be kicked out. Absolutely, I can help you." But for that brief excursion into ridiculous melodrama, the craftsmanship is quite good. Having Kaia go to work for Annie is a creative twist that is used to develop both characters more deeply.

As for the plot, I was amused through the beginning because it is an inversion of the usual "wife wrongs husband" story, with a number of the same tropes, although they are more skillfully handled than in most stories of that type. While the story veers off into a highly improbable lesbian direction, the overall quality of the writing makes the tale of Henry, Annie, and Kaia oddly compelling.

This story is woefully underscored and deserves a 5, despite the momentary lapse into "Snidely Whiplash ties Little Nell to the railroad tracks" prose. But, what do I know? I'm just an Anon, unlike the non-Anons with names like "Whogivesashit", "DetroitBigGuy", and "Elsiethecow". Until I came to Lit, I had no idea that parents gave their children such whimsical names.

interesting story and see where it leads ? 3some in the end or just the two girls together :)

When you can make it seem possible that the wife would work with then fuck the same girl that broke up her marriage with her husband.

I didn't see the twist coming, but you did it well. This flows well and is both entertaining and gripping.

Can't wait for the second half.

Hooked

Whoa! This us interesting t say the least. 5*, of course.

Excellent!!!!

Or you could do like Kalimaxos and invite people to write their own conclusion.

So she allows the woman who seduced her husband and broke up her marriage to go to work for her and seduce her when she wouldn't make any attempt to work with her husband to try and reconcile. What a f****** hypocrite.

Started off okay but the last page was garbage. 1*

Garbage, you need to find an editor that will help cut down on the unneccessry filler details.

Also lost me with the wife being attracted to the bitch.

The ending sucked

I quit reading

Not sure where you're going with this one, but you've peaked my interest. The character, Kaia, clearly has some mental health issues unless it's the gaps in her plot line that is making me jump to conclusions. 5* for now but there are some "gaps" that aren't making sense right now...

she decided to break up her family because of woman, then decided it was ok to have sex with her makes perfect sense in this morally screwed up world take the girls father from them and screw the woman that caused it.

rotflol

Great start.

Looking forward to the next chapter.

Thank you for your story.

I am so waiting for the next installment. I love the direction you are going.

Interesting development.

ANNIE IS A REAL FUCK UP....FROM THE TIME SHE BOUGHT THE HOTDOG AND MESSED HERSELF AND HAVING NO BRAINS TO CLICK A PIC OF THE CHEATING HUSBAND.....THEN AGAIN THIS WRITER IS FUCKED FOR ANNIE AND K HOOKING IP

Too contrived and manipulative. The reader is supposed to feel like an observer or a listener, not the focus of the characters' motives and actions. Just too absurd of a change in emotions, values, desires, and loss of self respect. So Kaia was Henry's slut, now Annie is to become Kaia's slut. No, not dramatic, preposterous. A very clever and quaint cartoon. Hey, I got it! Polyamory anyone? Kaia can have some of Henry's babies too!! No more ridiculous than what you have developed so far.

Thanks for the effort.

i love your style of writing, and love the way you present the characters to the readers. well done, another 5 star story

Good story let down by an increasingly improbable plot. This is actually a compliment, because as stories in Loving Wives go being improbable is a basic requirement hardly worth mentioning. But hey, if improbable is the name of the game then imagine if Kaia's plan all along was to seduce Annie, and her means to this end was to firstly seduce Henry to drive a wedge in his marriage, then have Annie all to herself. Man, now that WOULD be improbable.

~

And like many other commenters have pointed out, the inversion of the usual "wife cheats" trope was refreshing. Worked for me, and I had zero sympathy for Henry.

I have no issues with this story. It's difficult to get a different take on a LW story and I think you've achieved this quite well. Enjoying the story and wonder how many more twists there will be.

Ooooh..... Kaia is fucking evil!

Hopefully the rest of the story is better, I STRUGGLED through the first two pages it was that unbelievable. Nobody suggests counselling or forgiveness when it's a guy cheating even in a story because it's not realistic

This plot is an innovative twist on "the wife discovers that she is bi" game. With the added coincidence (is it really?) of Kaia working now for the cheated-upon wife, you have opened this story to interesting possibilities. We only have to accept that the serial cheater known as Kaia is so bloody attractive that she can seduce whatever man or woman she targets. Neither Henry or Annie are showing emotional/sexual control that would beat out a box of rocks.

I wish the author would find a proof reader who knew the difference between the past tense "laid" versus "lay", could apply the proper "too" rather than "to", (from other stories) "bought" versus "brought", and knew when to insert a "?" question mark. Cagivagurl, you are on the precipice of top-notch excellence.

Keep 'em comin'.

This is bullshit! Kaia asked Henry to transfer her and Henry refused. Henry obviously doesn’t love his wife.

Ug. Does this writer not know about sexual harassment laws?

EVERY OFFICE HAS THE KAIA BITCHES WHO LATCH ON TO SUCH BASTARDS TO FURTHER THEMSELVES!

HER PATHETIC FATHER SUPPORTING HIS GOLF BUDDY AND WHORING SIL IS SOMETHING ELSE

Really good and intriguing plot. One of yiur better and that is saying something

That was different

Is this how life is in NZ?

Everybody banging other coworkers in the office? And no repercussions?

I mean it happens everywhere...but there's always consequences.

You can't fuck your interns, new hires, and assistants. And shit like that is never a secret.

One sexual harassment lawsuit would break either company and put all three protagonists out of work... just saying! Thanks?