All Comments on 'Luscious Leftovers'

Okay as a small sample but now we need the story proper.

The bedroom scene wonderfully erotic; well paced, nicely done. The kitchen scene less well done. Not because of the theme, rather a bit rushed to move storyline/reader from oversized robe to spanking on couch and Lorena in control. That said, looking forward to part 2 not to mention how Dani ended up naked in bed after the party. More about party?

Great story please write the next part soon

Loved the bit with the feather. A lovely pink bottom is nice too, but the feather scene was my favorite part.

Really enjoyed it, hope that the next one is longer.

What lovely comments! I do have some ideas for other vignettes, and will submit them as time allows. I think the characters have potential.

Tell me you didn't leave us hanging right there. Please??????

Yes.. lots of potential!!

Great start. Looking forward to the next installment.

Thank you all for your patience! I'm trying my best to find time to finish other chapters, and will send them along when I can. I do enjoy this and am glad that you do as well.

Very nice! I like the story progression and character motivations present. Lorena forcing her adorable new subby-sub Dani to stay naked and Dani unable to find her clothes hit right into some specific kinks of mine.

I noticed you were swapping between past-tense and present-tense, though. There was also some general grammar and syntax errors, like using the wrong form of words for the sentence. I recommend giving it another proofread next time. Or, if it's difficult for you, I recommend asking a friend or someone on the Lit forums to beta read for you.

interesting