All Comments on 'LW's: Satisfaction Guaranteed'

I like happy endings. And yes, this was different. No doubt the troll will go ballistic. Screw 'em. Thanks! 5*

More Sci/fi than LW. Although LW seemed to be prominently involved. I'm still not really sure where Reyna came from nor did I understand why Lenny would allow all the medical and psychological testing be done without more explanations. For that matter, why didn't Lenny sue his ex-wife's Company and Rudy? Seems to me there was money to be made there. Did he get a big bonus and raise for finishing the project at his work? Lots of unanswered questions in this story that, if you had answered them, would have made this tale a lot better.

It almost seems like it should be Sci-Fi & Fantasy instead of LW.

and have discovered a new type of cloning, TK U MLJ LV NV

entertaining

Fantastic Loved it in Kinky Way!....Thanks for sharing this Brilliant story with us! 5 Stars ★ ★ ★ ★ ★ WOOF!

If only that could be true lol lol cool story

and it made an interesting read.

Some people will not like the lack of punishment for the cheaters, but or many people like Lenny, they really don't feel the need for revenge because the cheaters really are not worth it.

What happened to to the cheating ex-wife did she and asshole breakup after because he gets off on fucking married women I hope something bad happens to him and the ex sees him for asshole he is. One more chapter to tie up loose ends.

3*. Ending was a little off. Too many loose ends.

You should put it in Sci-fi. To make clone that fast is just, bit to advanced.

Any way, I like it regardless.

It is a story.

At least Aladdin, with his genie, had conflict.

There is no Jaffar here, and Princess Jasmine has no choice but to fall in love.

Yawn. Sorry, didn’t get enough sleep.

Needs more explanation for just how they did what they did.

I'm not worried about no revenge on the cheaters. Cheaters gonna cheat, they won't last.

And, PLEASE, forget about suing the company, it can't be done. His ex-wife might have had a sexual harassment suit, but not now.

4/5...I would gave given it a 5/5 but the 2nd half seemed a bit rushed. The concept of the story was very intriguing. Definitely would like to see more chapters of this revealing the details of how and why he and Randi both have look-a-likes as thir ideal mate. The concept is too good to abandon and leave at 1 story.

So Reyna's apparently fresh out of the tank, grown from his DNA, that much is more than hinted at. So, does she have identity documents to prove she exists? Can she work? Does she share Lenny's education and skills? Can she reproduce? What are the motives behind the LW organisation, they are not charging for the service, yet require clients to discretely spread the word to increase their "business", and as they create dossiers on new clients, are probably selective in who they let in? So many questions that lead on from this simple premise, we need a second chapter to realise at least some of the possibilities.

You could go dark, that some billionaire creep is quietly seeding the population with these clones ready for world domination. Or that Reyna may have trouble with immigration, acronym agencies, state and federal taxes, bank account background checks, driving licence, health insurance, electoral rolls, and questions about her past. She could even get confused meeting Lenny's cousin's new hubby being genetically so close to her hubby.

Or keep it light, with Reyna being a brilliant foil for Lenny's work, so with two like minds looking at the problems from slightly different angles, making all his future projects become out of this world, especially as neither of them are likely to be distracted. As she's impervious to seducers yet charming all in her deflections and selfless devotion to her other half, they impress employers or potential employers as a team. His ex-wife may become jealous, especially after Lenny gets his recent big project bonus followed by his swift promotion to VP, the couple being destined for a glorious future and soon blessed with twins on their way. Yes, a good premise to start, with enough legs to add to the story.

Yes, this is different.

Fantasies of the perfect partner usually die

with the first romance.

Let's face it, nobody is perfect.

The fantasy here was made a bit interesting

with attraction within family.

And I welcome stories with unusual plots.

But this was still outside my interest,

so no rating from me.

This was a very entertaining rad. Yeah, it was telegraphed but so what. Saddletramp, I enjoyed the way you worked the biblical angle in here

A very imaginative, well done story. Like I said, I don't love aythors but I love goos stories.

Best regards from an admirer,

C

Regular people with juuuuuust a couple slight modifications.

Write any stupid story you want about any lame topic, stick a "my wife cheated on me" prologue on it and call it "unique and original"?

Pops her mutant claws and goes on the hunt to bring back the heart of Jeannie so Lenny can finally have the closure he needs.

Dude, you're sick but keep 'em coming.

So, this is a genetic clone of him, turned into a woman, that vaguely resembles his cousin.

There's a reason incest is bad.

This didn’t go where I thought it was going

Not sure where it went actually

. . . Reyna was the android created by Mr Flynt, an earth human who was born immortal and outlived a hundred wives. She could not survive when Captain Kirk exposed her to the fact she was an android.

But super interesting.

Now that was different.

Thanks for pushing the envelope and trying a new idea instead of what many other writers do in recycling ideas.

You know there is one in there somewhere. This is a little too much "Twilight Zone" for there not to be a zinger somewhere down the road. Would I do what Lenny, Randi and the rest did; a chance to find the 'perfect other' without having to kiss frogs ad nauseum? Yes! Am I cynical enough to believe: "If it seems too good to be true, it probably is." That's Life as we know it, and a hard habit to break. Still, a little fantasy fulfillment is not such a bad thing, is it? (Don't tell me "no way", then sell the rights to your first born to grab Patrick Mahomes and Antonio Brown for your Fantasy Football team).

For all that, the story seems somehow... unfinished.

Belongs in Sci-fi, also this was horrid.

Different but nice. Too bad it's fiction... 5*

On a very different story. Loved it after too much of the same old on this genre.

Can’t help but love Lenny as the good guy wins. Out there but well written. Definitely a 5*

You left open everything about how his cousin's boyfriend looks like him and his newly created girlfriend looks just like her.

The story just stopped with little or actually no explanation on WHAT THE HELL JUST HAPPENED!

But will you finish it??? Lots of questions but do you have answers?@

It may have started as LW, but the bulk is definitely sci-fi.

Ending too rushed. This piece is a 5 for concept, 4 for writing, and a 2 for score because of no appropriate ending...think premature ejaculation. I am anonymous only because its a pain in the ass to log on the few times I make comments. My email is Tampamac3@gmail.com

This story took me in several different directions, none of which you followed, and got my own crative juices flowing. What if? Thanks for the ride.

Cute

Trusting sucker, I mean fellow, isn't he?

Grammar, spelling and punctuation are first class.

It's pity that the story is just plain stupid.

LW? Randi? Are there more I didn't catch?

I wonder if the title is trolling us: An unsatisfying ending(Satisfaction Guaranteed) in LW(Loving Wives). This story is a little like "There's this man in a box. The End." It's kinda missing info, context, a sensible ending. Everything from the doctor's appt to the end was odd. Why have the doctor involved in them getting married?? It was all very odd, missing character interactions & conversation.

part 2 please 5 stars

Does anyone help you with storyline?

Pretty good story, but I prefer your usual offering. Good idea to offer some variety though.

But, it doesn’t feel finished. The setup seems to have Randi in the picture beyond this point. The “Satisfaction Guaranteed “ promise an ultimate solution based on a long standing relationship.

Thanks for the opportunity.

Congratulations, BECAUSE of the telegraphed weird agency hints, I fully visualized the proper lighting of the hospital scene montage.

My first reaction was "Thank God you didn't have him wake up from a dream with the bloody god-awful hangover courtesy the first night bender, still clutching the crumpled divorce paperwork". So yeah, thanks for not doing THAT.

I think you DID want to leave room for a sequel, but could easily leave this as a stand alone thought experiment.

There are plenty of ways this could have been improved, but it really wasn't all that bad. The incest angle kept in some reader guess work and added tension. Will they or won't they?, did they ever in the past? (even answered later on). I get it, it actually worked.

I won't hate you for leaving this alone, but I appreciate you thinking outside the box, and I'd like to see that trend continue for your future endeavors. But perhaps spend some more time plotting out the scenes, as if writing a screenplay, and work towards better use of pacing to help provide some of the general effects that you are shooting for. Just a few things for when considering a mood piece along these lines.

Nice job, overall. and Thank you very much!

Interesting idea but it disappointed at the end,so much was spent on the build up,but then it became 'ok,that's all there is folks' story like this could have the twist,where all is not as it seems, or could explain how Reyna came to be and why she looked like his cousin and why her hubby looked like him. The ending was sort of dumped on us,and felt empty.

A great fantasy, I just wonder if it is in the correct category? According to authoritarians such as Blacknranell this category is for cheating wives and swapping spouses. This decent depiction of fantasy clearly does not belong here (jest).

Nice read. UIt may seem condescending, but a happy story is much better than the BTB and cuck2b we are force fed on this site.

Smokepole

Meh. Virtually no character development and a plot that should have landed it in one of the fantasy categories. Can't give it a good rating so I won't rate it and pull down your score.

Oh man. If only.

As usual. Enjoyed the story, but.

But did you actually look at what you wrote. Some is quite silly, like getting photos of wife fucking around after they separated. He would get laughed at, and if posted or sent anywhere he would end up being arrested and charged. Then the laughable reason on the divorce papers, just stupid as she never came scross as spiteful to him, just uncaring.

The LW was too vague and silly, making no sense whatever.

Card board cut out characters in an eighth grade sci-fi/fantasy story.

The wife had moved out and filed for divorce how do pictures of the guy she’s living with help in the divorce?

Why would she leave half the money in the accounts then demand 85% of the marital assets plus alimony.

The more I think about this story the worse it gets.

See what you did there, saddletramp1956.

Very funny😃😄😂😁.

Come along little John. Back to the forest.....

AMerryman

But great little diversion. I need those in my life at times. Your a good writer and shouldn't allow the poo poo crowd to divert from your craft. Not every story needs to be perfect every day or every time. I enjoyed this for what it was, fantasy and not my life at this moment.

Realism not necessary

I kept waiting for a hook - only to discover that was the hook

Nice little story about biocompanions, I really enjoyed it.

Interesting concept!!! Like Cherry 2000??

Good little story. Create your perfect match who nobody can take away? Awesome.

I was waiting for the big Climax where it turns out that Reyna's brain cells are infused with all of Lenny's anger about his divorce and she goes hunting for Jeannie and Rudy with Lenny's shotgun.

Why did Randi not invite him to her wedding and why did he not go for revenge on his ex-wife and Rudy?.

????

Biological android. DNA sample from Randi, another dimension, grow a near duplicate. Tsk

What the heck was that?? Is she a cyborg or something?

What a load of hogwash.

clever idea! Much better than the RAAC story about the slut who cheated for 9 years and saddled her husband with a bastard

What was all that stuff about his cousin? Didn't have any relevance to the story at all.

Nice, but anti-climatic. Seems his ex and her lover needs some comeuppance. Also, commenter nic-pic has the right handle. This is fiction, fruit of the imagination, and well written.

Nice fantasy. This could be a series of stories...

Ummm? That's all? Just an teen's fantasy?

Uh! They used Lenny’s DNA to make a female clone? No way! Your DNA includes your gender genes. If you take a male’s DNA and clone it you get another male. Also even if you could make the clone female, it would be like marrying your 100% identical twin! Any children could have severe birth defects. Now they could have used Randi’s DNA to make Lenny’s future wife but again it would be like marrying your first cousin.

I do think there should be more to this. Somehow it just seemed that in needed more like who and where did she come from. Overall, nice but not great.

Needs more. A good story.AAA++

Again, for the kinder, gentler saddletramp. I prefer Justus, or at least Amos.

Wimp Lenny should have circulated Slut Jeannie's to family and friends...frankly the cheaters got off easy in this divorce...NOT MUCH RESEARCH WENT INTO THIS STORY

This was more like scify then loving wives, although there was not even much depth in that. As far as the cheaters, where was the payback. How about his big project. A lit of loose ends in the story.

Reyna = Queen!

.

Perfecta-mundo!!! 5/5!!!

I thought Reyna would look like his Cousin. I would have his Ex-wife and her new husband cheated on each other for 20 good years. I want to include a birth with an unknown sperm donor

nice story I agree partially with falcon90 would have her new boyfriend cheating on her and she comes back to get kicked to the curb were she belongs 5

Never mind the negative comments, how can you make contact with this agency?

Utterly strange, but wonderfully different. Great job, Author!

Crap, and that’s being generous. Read like sophomoric assignment for a short story. 2 at best

Garbage

This guy just made his firm 500 million by working untold hours and he's on the clock?

"At 5:00, sharp, he clocked out and headed to the address Larry had given him."

Sorry but I feel that this just didn’t go far enough it was just too rushed, liked the idea

Yes, kind of a funky story compared to your others but still an interesting read...........():\

I wish this was possible!

150 days of accrued sick leave? Is there any company that does this anymore? I think you meant hours, not days. Also, it would have been nice to see that yes they were happy, successful and had a big loving family, and the ex-wife got divorced again due to cheating, and this time there was a pre-nup and she got very little... i.e. she thought they grass was greener, and ended up in pig slop.

What, He didn't sue his supervisor & company? W.T.F.?

So that's it?

This made no sense at all. It just seemed to be utterly stupid.

???????????????????????WTF????????????????,,

Duh!

Huh?

So he and his cousin were “meant for each other”. Very clever. 5*.

I like it. I like that she is probably a Synth.

Stepford Wife??? Good Story.

Maybe SF....

So a clone right? They cloned Randi,then imprinted her with his personality traits. Voila instant soulmate?

thought it was a little strange when the cousins hubby looked just like him ?? then his dream wife looks just like the cousin ?? interesting story,definitely different . otherwise maybe the cousins would have got together ??

It would be great if it was that easy, wouldn’t it. A fairytale, a fantasy, a dream, what ever, I liked it. It made me smile. All that and well written too. Thank you. ⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️

This is a mystical kind of a story and so it was not a story that I cared much about. Just not my cup of tea. I give the story only three starsl. Sorry, ST.