Maddy's Midlife Crisis

When we got home, Rick could hardly contain himself.

"What's the point to me putting it on?" I asked. "You're just going to end up taking it off, anyway."

"Life's a journey, honey, not a destination. Now let me enjoy some of the stops along the way," he remarked as he made love to me. He made me feel sexier and more desirable than I'd felt in a long time. Sexy and desirable enough that it gave me the final ounce of courage needed, and I resolved once and for all to go through with Tess's boat trip.

*****

Everything had worked out perfectly for the weekend. Both Rick and I had previous marriages, and we each brought a kid from our first marriages into our union. As it turns out, both of us had shared custody with each of our kids, but our kids were with our exes for the weekend, so we were free of that responsibility.

The anticipation must have been weighing on me because the day seemed to pass so slowly. You know how the day seems excruciatingly long when you just watch the seconds ticking by. I tried to take my mind off it and let the time pass while I took care of household chores or watching movies, but my eyes kept wandering over to the clock in every room, watching the time move slower and slower.

After lunch, we got ready to leave. I put on my new G string bikini and then slipped on some shorts and a tank top over it.

"Ready to go?" he asked as he turned on the car.

"As ready as I'll ever be," I answered.

"I don't know what's gotten into you," he said, turning to me before putting the car in reverse and backing out of our driveway.

"What do you mean?" I asked.

"I mean, you seem nervously excited about Tess' boat outing. And I don't think it's Tess that you're excited to see. It's like you're excited to get naked there or something. I don't think I've ever seen this side of you before."

I sighed deeply, knowing he was right but trying to contain my giddiness. "Are you okay with everything? Or are you just going through all this for me?" I asked Ricky, turning the question back on him.

"Hell, I just want to see you in that bikini again and maybe some other ladies, too," he said with a silly grin.

"Just remember who you're coming home with," I reminded him with a hard poke.

"Give me a reason to remember," he teased me.

"If you're a good boy, I'll make it worth your while," I promised.

Rick laughed. "I'll hold you to that."

The rest of the ride passed quickly. We pulled up to the marina, and we saw Tess and a tall handsome man I presumed was her husband, Alex, standing on the dock, next to a large 40-foot two-level yacht.

"Oh my God, Maddy, it's been so long!" Tess screamed as we walked up. "God, you look almost exactly the same as 18 years ago. she exclaimed.

We hugged, and then she introduced us around to the rest of the party.

Tess was still a 5'8" stunner. Her blonde hair was tied back in a ponytail, and her skin was bronzed. She looked incredibly fit, obviously having spent some time keeping toned, although her D cup breasts somehow stood out even more than they did back in college.

Her husband, Alex, was 6 feet tall and ruggedly handsome. His face was a little weathered, but he obviously spent a lot of time outdoors and kept himself in good shape.

Standing amongst them were two other couples as she proceeded with introductions.

Peter and Monica looked about the same age as us. They were both born in Greece and had beautiful olive skin complexions. I felt so pale in comparison. Peter had a dark mess of curly hair atop his head that blew around in the breeze, while Monica was a 5'6" dark-haired Mediterranean beauty.

The last couple was Shane and Marta, who also looked to be in their late 30's, early 40's. Shane was originally from Texas and still spoke with a drawl, while his wife, Marta, was born in Puerto Rico and was a buxom and vivacious 5'3" package.

A few minutes later, the men loaded up the coolers and other items for today's festivities while the ladies boarded the boat.

Everyone was perfectly pleasant and amiable. Rick seemed to fit right in with the guys as they grabbed supplies from the cars to bring on the boat. Of course, I swear that guys can just default to discussing sports, and the conversation is off and running.

The other ladies were dressed for an afternoon lounging on the lake. Monica and Marta wore shorts and a tank top like me while Tess was in shorts and her bikini top.

The sun was shining overhead, and the warmth radiated, but there was a cool breeze blowing across the water, so it was almost perfect conditions. With everything loaded, Alex fired up the engine, and we pushed off from the dock.

The engines hummed and we slowly made our way out of the bay and into the open waters, leaving the sleepy town of Coos Bay behind. Rick was geeking out over the yacht. The small 4-person fishing boat he usually went on with his buddies on the lake paled in comparison to this luxurious yacht.

"We'll go just a few miles off-shore. Just enough to have some privacy," Tess informed me.

As the boat chugged along, the coolers were opened up, and everyone grabbed a drink.

I took a glass of wine, hoping that might calm my nerves. I couldn't help but compare myself to Tess. She was still so much like the Tess I knew back in college. Some people, even though they grow older, they still maintain a youthful vibrancy. That was definitely Tess. She was always the life of a party and had the perfect response for any situation. What's more, she still had a great figure and was just so energetic. She has a few lines on her face, but she could still pass for almost 10 years younger than her actual age.

Meanwhile, I felt a million miles away from the girl I was in college. I'm not even sure if any shred of that girl was still left in me anymore. Marriage, kids, mortgage, and divorce had long since shattered any illusion of the idealistic youthful innocence I once harbored. Nevertheless, I found myself pushing back against the cynicism that so often comes with the years. Maybe it was a hopeless mission, but I longed to recapture some of that youthful spirit, even if just briefly, and that best explains why I was out there.

I was always shy and slightly introverted, which was also part of my motivation in being there. I wanted to break past my own self-imposed comfort zone, and I sure as hell wasn't going to do that without trying new and different things in life. So, there I was, taking a second glass of wine. Liquid courage, as others often called it.

The shore was off in the distance at this point. There were a few boats also visible in the water, but they were all far off when Alex killed the engines. I looked around. The guys came down from the top deck and started pounding back the beers and grabbing some fishing gear. Rick looked like he already fit right in.

The waters were pretty calm, and the boat floated lightly on top of the slow rolling currents.

"Ladies, how about we go up on the top deck to catch some rays?" Tess asked. "We can leave the men alone down here to their own devices."

The other ladies all quickly stripped off their outerwear. I stood frozen like a deer in headlights as I watched them casually ditch their shorts and tank tops. I took note that Monica and Marta were both in thong bottoms while Tess had on a G string.

As they kicked off their shorts, I figured I'd better catch up lest I look like an oddball. There's nothing like peer pressure to add to my liquid courage and push me over the edge. The next instant, I'd pulled off my tank top and then my shorts were off in quick order.

I looked around. The men had taken notice, briefly setting aside their rods and reels to take in the feminine scenery. The other ladies didn't appear to have any tan lines whereas I had plainly spent no time in a bathing suit, let alone a bikini all summer.

My heart was racing. For Monica, Marta, and Tess, this all seemed to be expected and normal, but for me, it felt exhilarating. My heart was racing. I tried to look calm, but I raised my eyebrows at Rick, in a hopeful but playful gesture to silently say, 'Hey, look, I'm actually doing it.' He gave me a supportive smile and a wink before I turned to the ladies again.

We all proceeded to climb the ladder to the top deck. We each found an area to lay out, and then we made idle small talk. I learned that Marta worked in real estate and Monica worked as a hospital administrator. It turns out that after college, Tess went into advertising. It was a pleasant group of people, and I found myself enjoying the company and fitting in faster than I imagined I would.

After a while, Monica and Tess undid the strings on their tops, although they were lying on their stomach. After a half hour baking in the sun, they decided to turn over, and they left their tops behind.

"Boy, you guys aren't shy to sunbathe topless, are you?" I remarked as their breasts lay bare in the sun.

Tess laughed lightly while Monica explained, "Back in my native Greece, it is quite common in the beaches for a woman to be topless. Here in the USA, they sexualize a woman's breasts so much, but it is really quite natural."

"Besides," Tess chimed in, "we're miles away from anyone else. We can just relax and enjoy things. There's no one out here to see us, anyway."

"I suppose you're right," I conceded, still unsure if that was a step too far for me.

"You should try it yourself. It's liberating in some ways. Free the nipple, as the hippies say," Tess said, laughing at her own joke.

Like I said, peer pressure coupled with a few glasses of wine had me ready to do things I didn't normally do. That was exactly what I came on the boat trip for, anyway. There's that old saying, when in Rome, do as the Romans do. Well, it might not be Rome, but I was on Tess' boat, so I should do as all the other ladies were doing, I reasoned.

The next thing I knew, I had loosened the knot holding my bikini top in place, and I let my top fall off.

"Jesus, Maddy, you've got no reason to be shy!" Tess shouted out.

"What are you? A C-cup?" Marta asked.

I nodded in the affirmative.

"I only have my B cup breasts. Monica, too," Marta said enviously.

"Of course, Tess is over there with her D cups," Monica chimed in. "She gets lots of attention from our husbands," she said teasingly.

"I thought you guys complained that the USA sexualizes breasts too much," I pointed out.

"Who doesn't think a woman's breasts are beautiful?" Marta added. "At least not while they still have a nice form. Later on, if we are old, maybe it is different, but for now, they should be celebrated. It is one thing to sexualize, but it is another to celebrate their beauty. And, even worse, I think it is a crime to always keep them covered up and pretend as if they are not like a work of art to be admired. And what good is art, if it is not on display to be admired from time to time."

Funny how normal the whole situation felt. Maybe I really did just need to get over my own fear. We continued on, letting the wine flow as freely as the conversation. Eventually, the bottles ran dry, and Tess asked if I could go down and grab another bottle.

I was having so much fun, I didn't even think twice about it. I got up and started climbing down the ladder. As I did, I remembered the men were down there, still fishing away, and I paused on the steps. It was one thing to be topless with a bunch of other ladies. Now I'd be topless in front of a bunch of men. I felt a nervous excitement fill my body, and I took a deep breath and decided it was now or never.

I tried to act naturally as all the men turned around to see who had come down from the top deck. Rick's jaw about hit the floor when he saw that I was topless. All I was wearing was a G-string. I was practically naked as I walked over to the cooler to grab another bottle of wine. With no bra on, my tits lightly bounced as moved across deck. I was about to go back up when I realized that I needed to open the bottle.

"Where's the wine opener?" I asked.

"It's over here," Alex called out as he held up the wine opener in his right hand. "The rest of these guys are beer drinkers, but I prefer wine and liqueur myself. Bring it over here and I will open it for you."

The men were friendly, but I felt their eyes leering over my body as I stepped up to Alex and handed him the bottle.

"Are you ladies having fun up there?" Peter asked.

I was conscious all their eyes were upon me, seemingly feasting on my body. Clad only in a G string, I might as well have been standing naked in front of them with only a small path of material covering my pussy. I tried to portray calmness, although inside my nerves were jumping.

"It's like the song says, 'Girls just want to have fun'" I responded with a smile. I felt my nipples harden as I stood there while their eyes took in my curves, my ass and tits hanging out for all to see.

I looked over and saw Rick watching. I couldn't quite tell what he was thinking. One second, he looked concerned if I was ok. Then he looked like he was jealous of the other men all taking in the sight of his wife's practically naked body. And then a second later again he looked like he wanted to make love to me right then and there.

I started to wonder if Alex was deliberately taking his time to remove the wine cork, but then I heard a loud pop as the cork finally pulled free from the bottle.

"Here you go, madame," Alex said with gusto as he handed the opened bottle back to me.

"Thank you," I replied. I was so nervous by then, I curtsied for the one and only time in my life before I turned around to climb back up the ladder and return to the rest of the ladies.

"It took you a little bit," Tess teased me after I handed her the bottle.

"I'm sorry, we had some issues to get the bottle open," I explained.

"It's okay," Monica spoke. "We saw the whole thing from up here. It seems you are quite popular with our husbands. They will make love to us tonight, but I think maybe they will be thinking of you."

I blushed. "I'm sorry, I didn't mean to - "

"It is ok.," Monica laughed. "We know our husbands and how they are. And still we married them, right?"

I laughed, thankful they seemed understanding.

"Like I told you," Marta added. "Your body is like a beautiful sculpture, and the men down there, they just wanted to admire the fine art for a few moments. I cannot blame them for admiring your body. I do not mind myself to admire it a bit. You should not be ashamed; you should be proud."

We all laughed as we raised our glasses for a toast to good friends and new horizons. In that moment, life seemed almost perfect with the ocean breeze blowing through our hair, and the warm sun glimmering off the endless Pacific Ocean.

I remembered that Tess was a few months older than me, and suddenly turning 40 didn't seem so bad. I'd started off the day filled with doubt and trepidation, but now I was surrounded by good friends, I had a drink in my hand, and I had taken a step into conquering my fears and embracing new directions. Life was good, and I was feeling the best I'd felt in a long, long time.

******

I'd been on a high since my exhibitionist adventure on the open waters last week on Tess' yacht. My co-workers all noticed my change in demeanor during the week. I was more lighthearted, less stressed out, and just generally more cheerful.

"Maddy, you've to give me some of that Kool-Aid you're drinking," they teased me.

Before last weekend, I'd neglected myself for years. My first marriage had been rough, and it was just the last straw when my first husband (the bastard) cheated on me. By then, I had devoted myself to motherhood, and my own self-care became secondary.

It was a few years before I met Rick, and he was like an angel entering my life. He was also divorced with a kid of his own, but we clicked and married after a year of dating. We've been married for a few years now, still, I devoted myself to my husband and our kids, and it's been ages since I really took time to just focus on me.

That's why last weekend felt so liberating. My husband, Rick, joked that I must be going through a mid-life crisis. Although I denied it, deep down I knew Rick hit the nail on the head. For so long, I'd played it safe. I'd done everything I was supposed to. I'd gone to college, I had a good career, gotten married, and had a family. Then I my 40^th birthday approached, and suddenly I started thinking about what I really wanted out of life, and I realized that something was missing. The thrill. A sense of excitement. I didn't know exactly what that entailed, but I knew I needed a change.

So, when I recently reconnected with an old college friend, Tess, I jumped at the opportunity. In college, Tess had a joie de vivre and a wild streak that I found myself wanting to adopt. I sensed that Tess was still that same woman she was before, and I hoped her influence would rub off on me, and it all culminated in an excursion on Tess' yacht. I ended up topless on the boat and parading around in front of all the husbands wearing only a small G-string.

For some women, maybe this would not be a huge deal. I know there are women barely dressed on many beaches, but, for me, it was a huge step. I dress conservatively, usually wearing looser clothing to avoid showing off my body. I know I'm not bad looking, 5'6" tall and 135 pounds with shoulder length brown hair, although I'm always conscious of my flaws. Rick tells me that's I'm too hard on myself, but I can't help feeling self-doubt.

I went home with Rick that night after the boat excursion, and we engaged in the longest, hardest night of lovemaking we'd ever shared. I was still on a high from my exhibitionist showing, and I felt unbelievably sexy, my self-confidence at an all-time high. I'd never openly embraced my sexuality before, and I felt liberated in a very real sense to truly just enjoy making love to my husband. Rick later confided that he couldn't get the sight of me parading around naked in front of everyone out of his head, and it acted like an aphrodisiac on him. As it turns out, both of us were so turned on the entire day, all the pent-up arousal practically just poured out of our bodies as we made love. I never climaxed so easily in my life, and Rick's ego was pumped up after he brought me to orgasm three times. I remember thinking how mind blowing the sex was, and it felt life changing in some strange way, as if I had been awakened to a whole new reality.

I kept thinking how foolish I had been repressing myself, not allowing myself to fully enjoy sex. I regretted all the years not fully committing to the pleasures of the flesh. Maybe it was my upbringing in the church. Maybe it was my parents who weren't openly affectionate with one another. Whatever it was, I spent far too long thinking that the pleasures of the flesh were a false happiness rather than just taking happiness wherever you can find it in all of its forms.

Anyway, Tess called me a few days afterward, and we talked for a long while. During the call, she invited Rick and myself to a party at her house that weekend. I was elated and immediately accepted her invitation.

"I don't know," Rick teased me after I told him about the invite. "These people have all seen you naked."

"Oh, come on," I pleaded with my husband. "Besides, you had a lot of fun last weekend, too. And we had even more fun after we got back home," I reminded him.

Rick just laughed heartily. "Who are you, and what have you done with my wife?"

I couldn't help but grin cheekily. "Are you complaining about the new me?"

Rick eagerly shook his head. "Not a damn chance. I just had no idea there was this vixen lying in wait all this time."

I threw my husband a wink. "Yeah, you'd just better hope that you can keep up."