All Comments on 'Memphis's Ranch Ch. 02'

Leave me a comment please. Do you like the story? Also I am still looking for an editor to preview my work befor I post it. I have chapter 3 almost ready to post if I find an editor. Chapter 4 is coming along nicely.

PLEASE!!!!!

Show us Readers what YOU intend as "SPEECH"!

Use "inverted" commas to show it is different to 'text'!

Good story. You do need an editor/collaborator. If I had the time I would offer to help. Between the CO and Memphis there are several levels. He would have a team leader and chief at least. A Petty Officer 2nd Class would not have access to his CO as you describe. His Master Chief would fill that role. Also as the FNG he would be too busy for a serious relationship. Just because he completed training does not mean he is fully integrated

Another good chapter, thank you. I would say grammar errors are the main issue, you'll get there.