All Comments on 'Mikayla and the Bondage Hotel'

Such a great story, can't wait to see where it goes :D

There are a few things that you should consider:

1) Have a safe word in case the bondage gets too extreme;

2) Feeding the models, Mikayla did not have breakfast nor lunch that first day. She was given some water a couple of times but that was it until she was released. Now, normally, the eating is usually not actually a part of the scene however it would be good to indicate that the model does eat.

Her first appointment did not seem to last the full four hours so she did go a lot longer for the conference. I assume that the four hour time limits are for her room appointment only, and displays can last longer. I am kind of surprised that the one man that severely abused the one girl (that quit the next day) would have been allowed back in. Oh, he did not abuse Mikayla this time so maybe he was told to tone down his abuse. I assume also that the Bondage Hotel includes some pain (mild sadism?) otherwise this is kind of unique point of the story. Is Mikayla supposed to be full time in the building? What about her apartment. WHen does she find out about her ratings (end of day or end of week)? What other facilities are available: medical, exercise, entertainment, cafeteria, etc? So, the people are not suppose to have sex with the models? What happens if it does occur? Are there cameras in the appointment rooms? Nice beginning, the writing is really well done. More please.

First paragraph - “thought to herself” is written twice within three sentences.

Second paragraph - First sentence would be smoother if it was She glanced around as she removed the hood of her raincoat.

Point is find a proofreader

And interesting. Keep it up.

Thoroughly enjoyed this story, really hope for a part two. Or more|!

I definitely want some more. You have a great start and the potential for a lot of shoot offs from here. Following Mikayla, if she stays there or something happens with the guy in 402. You could also do stories on other who work at and visit the hotel.

Interesting! Needs more info about Mikayla and how she is treated by other guests. A bit more realism, such as no bathroom breaks for her???