All Comments on 'Modified Adverts Ch. 02'

I like your story but 3 out of the four pages seemed like needless and drawn out narrative about changes to the videos. Then the story ended without going anywhere. 3 stars,

Okay so I ready the first two parts and I am not impressed, in fact I am rather disappointed. First, it sounds like someone is tring to sound smarter then they really are and that's okay because it's fiction not reality. Second, this falls more under mind-control not incest so you might want to re-think you genre, Third, when continuing your story try to think of new material because so far its just repeating the same thing just at different pace. That's all just one more thing try to read your story's and view them as a reader would and make changes based on if you lose interest in them then so would your readers.