All Comments on 'Mom Pt. 01'

I enjoy stories like these where the bad guy gets the girl because there’s nothing realistic about that(sarcasm). No but seriously I mean the way the bully keeps going through life unharmed and unchecked. Good for him. I applaud this fantasy. And the way the son is soooo pathetic and willing to let his mom be seduced by his bully nonetheless speaks volumes of the hidden depravity that lurks in peoples minds these days. Unfortunately every now and then some bozo will get it in his head to make his fantasy a reality. Tsk tsk tsk. I wish there was a cuckold genre so I’d avoid reading stories like this because that’s basically what this is. Traditionally cuckold is sexual humiliation but this is emotional and mental humiliation/cruelty. But you obviously already know that. There seems to be a recurring theme here with you. You’re either a bully with wife stealing fantasies or a bully victim who craves their own masochistic humiliation. Either way please do not manifest these fantasies to reality. Too many people think they can get away with things like this. That is until they meet an individual like me. But then again there’s no one quite like me. Til next time I’m Jon Hollidaye, but you can call me Jonni.

Then write the story. If you get REALLY good, no make that GREAT, then and only then can you attempt to write a story with multiple plot lines crossing into multiple areas. This is just a mess.

First off everyone who gave negative feedback, needs to chill the hell out.

Second to the idiot who basically wished for someone to hit me fuck you.

Third addressing that person again, you can punch or hit someone without leaving marks. Yes i know i said Chad slapped his back hard four times, but whose seriously going to check his back huh?

Yes i have been in high school and yes I was bullied too. Its was mostly name calling.

Im not changing my story method to having Chad be a big black guy as not what i write. Robert's mom doesn't doesn't know it's Chad. Second her son is a wimp, Robert doesn't want his parents involved. So when Chad says he is (since hes the friend) who do you think the mom would believe? Its fiction people.

Jesus. I wonder how much hate ill get for the second chapter or the third or the fourth.

Second chapter is in the works. All haters leave don't need your poison on my stories.

Said my peace.

come on have the beat the shit out of chad and convince his mom that this is who is bulling him nobody should be bullied even in a story and get away with it man up and write a good ending

Since wheb is 6 inches big

Please explain how this is loving wives? Maybe a review of the loving wives description is in order. Perhaps you should stick with "incest". This category is a bit harsher to post into.

First off, it’s a story about a wife having sex with others, so that means it belongs in this category. There always one moron who has to make a ridiculous comment about her not being a “loving” wife, but that’s because he’s too stupid to have bother to read the category description. It’s all about extra marital sex.

Yes, it is similar to other stories, but then again almost every story can be compared to others. Don’t let the assholes dissuade you from continuing. Do what most authors do and simply delete their moronic rantings. You could write better than Hemingway and as long as the wife had sex with someone else, they will while and cry about it. Such complete losers.

Please continue the story the way YOU want to, not how anyone else tells you to do it. Keep writing and we’ll keep reading.

Then letting Dad know, divorcing her and giving her nothing but lots of grief and tossing her out on her well used ass ends the tragic story of Selene a well deserved demise.

Only problem I have is she went from loving wife and mom that never would dream of cheating to sucking the bullies cock. No explanation of how he convinced her. Maybe it was in the car. This would be much better and more believeable if she was being forced at every step of the way. More exciting as well.

I hope in next chapters she’s forced to suck and fuck Chads friends get gangbanged and forced to do things she would never do.

Then it would fit and be more believable. JMO

bullying is not cool

1 Star is too generous but there is no negative so 1 Star it is. Plot has been done before. High school male of 5 foot 8 inches attracts a mom? Why? Either mom is too dumb to not see abused son and manipulating teen bully or emotionally stunted and attracted to teens. Tell your audience which and why.

Develop some drama, suspense and make me interested in why this family is about to go through pain and humiliation. Or stop

I vote for STOP!

Many of these assholes running your work down are bullies themselves, they just aren’t smart enough to realize it. Just like the school bully chooses the smaller kid to show what a ‘Big Man’ he is, these who hide behind the Anonymous bush feel free to say the most outrageous things.

To be fair, not all bullies hide behind the Anon label. You pulled a couple of beauties here, but the one most curious is deblackbuster’s comment about deleting negative comments. If you deleted negative comments, then what the heck am I reading right now.

I was always the big farm kid who could throw around 200 lb bags of fertilizer, so I didn’t get picked on personally, but I saw many who did and am ashamed to say that in my misguided quest to be popular I mostly looked the other way. I did beat the shit out of one bully that was picking on a kid I really liked, and that cost me with the in crowd.

Anyway regardless of what these folks say, you have decided to speak up for a group who badly needs a champion and for that I congratulate you—keep up the good work.

BTW this is in the right category—there’s nothing that would lead any sensible person to think a cheating wife must choose one particular type of man. The 18 yr old of your story meets all the sites specs.

Re: the one who spoke of the kid beating the bully—are you kidding. What chance do you think a petite junior would have had against my 180 pounds of muscle? He would have had to resort to a weapon, which is probably why we have so many school shootings today.

KEEP WRITING! A lot of us are reading, but most who write may not comment because the Lit LW commando will 1 Bomb their stories.

In this time of so many school shootings, most said to be related to bullying, how does anyone praise a story glorifying a high school bully? Will you write the part where Rob finally snaps, kills Chad and his slut mom, and then goes off to school to finish off all his tormenters? Will you write about the innocents who die as a result of the bullying? I doubt that you will. You'll write more about Rob's humiliation over being bullied, and increasing degradation of his mother. A sick premise that will certainly appeal to that segment of the LW readership who are already calling for Rob's father to be humiliated by being cuckolded by a school boy.

I 'll look out for the next chapters.

I DO hope Chad gets what he so richly deserves.

By the way, your story seems to have attracted a bit of an infestation in the comment section.

A quick glance and the "Also in this series" and it looks like a re-write of Mom and the Bully, which it is linked to along with Mom's Ghost and Special Boy. I think you need your links sorted.

Then stop this! At first it felt like there was going to be a slow burn and an older boy was going to come along (5' 6" is not average for an 18 year old boy). Then bam! Mum is in bed with the bully, no reasoning (or I missed it as I'd started skimming), no thought.

Absent father, not his fault (well other than the lessons he didn't teach his son).

Drip of a son, it's your mother FFS! protect her!!

Idiot of a mother. It's just a shame they reproduced rather than keep out of the gene pool.

Can't wait to see the next chapter.

Shit piled higher and deeper. There is no place for this story to but into the shit can,

And I didn't like this at all.

Hope that Robert grows a set

of balls and pummels Chad.

And not one likeable character?

I'm out.

Loved the story. I gave is five stars to offset all the negativity.

It needs a bit of work on the POV. You could try Third person narrative.

Hey op, I know you are getting a lot of shit from some but trust me. This is a good story that unfortunately attracts the wrong kind of attention from guys who already know they won't like it in the first place. I don't why they bother. Pretty strange/ Anyway, I will that this again this is a good story and don't let the negative comments get to you. I hope to see you write out more of this story.

Thanks

The way you describe the son anyone would think he is in year 4 or 5, he is portrayed as supposedly someone who is intelligent but a mummies boy.

Chad is presumed to be at least eighteen years of age in this story.

The mother is so shallow that she is having sex with someone she has just met and within earshot of her son.

Nothing to commend this story whatsoever.

It is clear that this story is inspired by 'Chad the bully', but it can evolve in many ways, I would like to see things like Selene leaving her husband and telling her son that she is Brad's girlfriend, or getting pregnant because of Brad, Maybe Brad as Robert's stepfather? Getting to these extremes may take several chapters but it sounds good to me. Good job

I already did part 2. I explain in that chapter how Selene ended up with Chad. How Robert's parents don't believe him unless there is proof. Tom meets Chad for the first time. I continued different plot lines in chapter 2. I also added a small funny funny part near the end of chapter 2 also.

Selene after this coming chapter is Chad's girlfriend. Im adding his change in behavior in chapter 3. A lot of drama and tragedy too.

I keep getting emails from people telling me to place this story under incest. No, i already did a series about incest called mom's special boy.

This series fits in loving wife, because Selene is slowly cuckolding Tom with chad.

Having 26thNC comment about bullying is like Col Sanders posting about too many chickens being killed for food. That old grouch is one of the first on here to try to bully an author if they post a story that hurts his feelings I.e. doesn’t have a husband killing a cheating wife.

Normally I’m more of a slow burn type of reader, but for whatever reason the super accelerated pace is working for me on this one.

Pretty well written. I like that the handling of the perspective and really good scenes overall. Definitely looking forward to the rest.

What's so courageous about a teen saying out lout to his parents "Chad is bullying me"? What could actually get worst about his current situation, that uttering this phrase could make it even more unbearable?

And, even more importantly... how hard is it, nowadays, to prove that some kids are getting bullied? It would one thing if this was happening, say, back in the 90's or even at the start of the millennium, but, today, every child out there have a cellphone! Are you really, seriously, telling me that Robert is too much of a retard to simply record Chad getting on his case, then play the audio to his folks? Hell, he doesn't even have to muster the courage of telling mommy about his bully, if he simply record himself being bullied!

I get it, author - it's your fantasy... it's just, when put next to reality, that is sound so fucking stupid. Damn me, once again taking complete nonsense seriously.

Great concept, but please consider proofreading. It’s not a huge deal, thakouth. Can’t wait for chapter two!

but it's still a good one

Be nice if you explained how Chad seduced Selene in the kitchen, to go to her bedroom to make out & then 69. Especially when she said she was faithful & wouldn't cheat on her husband. So really confused on how he changed her mind.

You live up to your pseudonym: "Asperger's syndrome is a contact and communication disorder and belongs to the autistic spectrum. Typical for this disorder of the autism spectrum* are limitations in interaction behavior, a lack of empathy, intensive (special) interests and holding on of habits and rituals."