All Comments on 'My Girlfriend's Neglected Mother'

A man's dream, for sure! Even better when one can imagine the family who inspired the tale! Well done!

How I wish ... Great story! What guy wouldn't like to marry a rich hottie like Jennie! Then to get the equally hot mother-in-law - whoa! And not just once but on a regular basis! A dream come true!

I found your style a bit off-putting at times - sometimes had to re-read to figure it out! However, the story was sexy enough to justify in my mind the 5 stars I gave it.

HOT HOT HOT

Outstanding.

Loved it!!

Each story of yours just gets better and better.

Keep them coming !!!!

Very well done, Mary -- another winner. Five big shiny ones and a favourite too ;) !

There is so much more that can be done with this. Looking forward to it...

Really enjoyed the story, but two things were disturbing:

1. EDIT! So many typos, missing words, fragments, etc. A few are understandable, but you have a plethora of them.

2. When you commit to a first person narrative, your are limited to describing only the actions that your narrator witnesses. Here, you have several vignettes where the narrator wasn’t present. That’s sloppy, and you can do better.

This was a great little story.

This would be almost every guys dream event and life style.

see rapierwit's comment.

That was a HOT HOT HOT story. We need more please.

Good story, but so many mistakes. Especially towards the end. Did you get tired of your own story? At one point you seem to be having a sort of threesome with Jenne and Mr. Hollins instead of his wife.

"Mr. Hollins scooped the cunt cream-cum combo flowing from her daughter's sex, brought the finger to her mouth, and dropping to her knees..."

"Jennie and I are going to lay in the sun," Lay what? Eggs. The word is 'lie'.

I'd marry jennie

Plus 5pts for the Technivorm call out!

I hated finding this so close to the end:

"As Jennie, gasping for air, slumped onto the bed, Mr. Hollins scooped the cunt cream-cum combo flowing from her daughter's sex, ...." I think that's intended to be "Mrs. Hollins" instead. It certainly doesn't read well.

Otherwise enjoyed the read. There were other minor glitches here and there. This one was a bit jarring, especially so close to the end.

Well done

At one point Jennie states let me, and the apparently `pushes into him` . Shouldn't it be onto, not into?

Probably your best wrk to date. You have set the bar high.

I absolutely loved it. This was an amazing storyline. I enjoyed this story and many others of yours.

Really enjoyed this one...well done!

Awesome work. Very well written. Need a sequel tio this story

Thank you Mary.

As always the story is hot and a pleasure to read and cum with.

Ignore the grammer errors. Just enjoy the best story on Lit!

HC

MORE! MORE!MORE!

HC

:-) O:-)B-):-)

loved the story!

MR COLLINS in the last scene ate his cum? Try proofreading.

Loved the story

... in every literal sense of the word. Some of the best dialogue I have ever read in a sex story. Easily among the top 5 stories published here.

… for lack of proofreading by someone who lacked their criticism being proofread. Insufferable.

i love the dialogue. its excellent, even for non porn. the humor is great. the sex is the weakest part.

All in all, well done and worth rereading

A great erotic story. Excellent descriptive writing. LOVED IT XXX

extremely well done

Gotta say I really did enjoy this little read,and am looking to the next story. Thank you.

thanks Mary

may I do you as I read it again

could you aak your mom?

to cum along too?

jack

Great writing! Very hot story.

Thanks

Please finish the story.

Weird

Wonderful

I concur with MrJohnnySir.

I was impressed with the dialog.

I especially noted it when Jenny was role-playing her mom.

Masterful.

🌟🌟🌟🌟🌟

Paul in Oklahoma

Damn good piece of storytelling. Thanks for sharing.

Wonderful storytelling, a fluid read.

Some minor errors in mixing up Mr. & Mrs.

Would love to read an update on these three. One storyline could be;

Jennie, is pregnant and Mrs. Hollins takes over the wifely duties.

Another could be Jeannie goes away to college and Michael still lives in the suite, while Mr. Hollins snores, Mrs. Hollins explores.

Well that was fantastic. I don’t know what I was expecting, but not that. Great work.

Very good. Wondering if Mrs. Judge and Mrs. Collins will both end up pregnant at the same time... 😁

while the sex was hot, and good, and I love people that take care of their bodies, was tempted to check date this was written when he asked Mr for her hand in marriage...1950? 60? her his property to be given away...??Puhleez...!! and bad luck for groom to see bride, as he's blasting huge load spunk into her high school age snapper, so he switches to her mom...?

Silly but fun, lot’s of sex nice characters and good old sexy games, REALLY needs to be proofread and putting the missing words back in.

Loved it, so real!

Good lead in , Great characters and hot sex!

Sorry to be a wet blanket,but I thought it was a load of crap.

Loved the story, service the mother-in-law and all is well in the family. The ironic thing is the daughter is supportive of the three way relationship and Michael has the best of both worlds. Well Done 5 stars

This story was GREAT! I loved it!

wow!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Oh my! Almost lost a load there. How about a 1 or 2 more chapters, please?

Great fiction story GREAT..why do so many critics fail to realize this is fiction. SMH

Great story...as has been posted, follow up with more chapters.

One typo-fixie. Bottom of last page.

mrS, not Mr.

Wow too hot. The hot mom sure adds a lot to the story. There sure wouldn’t be much to complain about in his life, except trying to hide it from the Dad all the time.

One hot erotic story.. didn't want it to end...great job

Nice story; I enjoyed it a lot.

Thanks for sharing your work.

It's a cute story. I liked it.

The only problem is the father. In real life, he gets very defensive about the thought that his women would find replacements for him when he can't deliver what they desire. Just a note for a future tale.

Good work! I envy the young man.

Superb. Good to read and fantasy fuelling. I loved it.

@Anonymous from 8.9.21

"The only problem is the father. In real life, he gets very defensive about the thought that his women would find replacements for him when he can't deliver what they desire. Just a note for a future tale."

No. Wrong. Some people would do that sure, but you can't say that is how everyone would react, that's just incredibly naive.

Liked it!!! Blending in the mom was seamless. Also made it much hotter. Keep writing for our entertainment, but give proofreading a chance.

Omg so sucking fucking hot, totally debauched and depraved, love it, two gorgeous cunts to play with. I absolutely adore cunt in every way. Cunt lapping sex maniac Lanc’s UK.

Awesome story from the perspective of the two seductresses and their future husband/lover. I really enjoyed the premise of the story. It seems clear that the mother and daughter are lovers and this was definitely planned for a while. The only thing hotter would have been if he knocked up both mother and daughter, though I don't know how you'd realistically pull it off, unless the father is actually fine with it, so long as they're discreet.

Any chance for a similar story with two hot women, but with a more innocent guy--one that checks all of their boxes, especially in bed, but they have have to corrupt and manipulate him into agreeing?

Absolutely superb. Very erotic with at least a touch of reality. loved it.

The best story of this kind I've read to date! I'm really sorry you don't write here anymore and will probably not see this.

Thank you.

Oh boy! This was so much fun! Please write some more if you can!

This was amazing. Will love to see another chapter with these 3 lovebirds.

Wonderful

What can I say that you haven't already been complemented on. Outstanding.

Wow!!!!! This was Superb! One of my most Favorite stories on Literotica!!! Great job. A few errors but didnt take away anything from my enjoyment of the action. Wish that i had a Mrs. Hollins...Dammmm

Fantastic!

only one quibble...would have been so much hotter if mom and dot both had muffins, rather than bald...

(12/4/2021) Excellent! This was one of the best short stories I've read on this site and is now on my favorites list. I only spotted one hiccup close to the end when you wrote Mr. instead of Mrs. Hollins. 5 stars of course.

Awesome story!

VERY hot story. I sure hope there's more to come soon. Maybe the honeymoon vacation for the 3 of them. Thank you for a great story and please keep them coming. 5 stars indeed.

One of the best authors I've found on here! Keep it going!

One of the best stories I have ever read on this website. Keep up the good job.

Whew, that was amazing! I agree with Kijn91, a top story! Really hot and so well-written. Older women always fascinated me even while being loyal to my younger wife! Keep writing!

And I would like, if both becoming pregnant at the same time.

Hot AF!!!

💙💙💙💙💙💙👍👍💙💙💙💙💙💙

I would really like a part 2 to this story. there is so much i can see in this future. Think about it. Thanks

When I started this piece, I thought I had read it before, but as I got into it I changed my mind. A great storyline, well written with good grammar. Make sure your proofer reads it slow. A couple of errors, but nothing big, as the story read well. Yes, I would agree with those asking for more chapters. Now that Mom had a taste of Michael, even with a threesome always available, the girls may have some friction between them over availability. Also, there has been no mention of his family. Maybe an older sister, who trained him originally, wants back in the line-up. Then there is the breeding thing, and does Mom get knocked up? Or maybe non of the above. It's your call, MaryAnderson. Great job! Keep writing.

XYZ

Wonderful, wonderful story...I agree that a second chapter, at least, is needed (to carry on at least some of the family background)...

Five **5** Stars!!

Outstanding !

Far and the best I've ever read,,,5+

"Living the Dream" as I recall dating this one blonde in high school and when i met her Redhead mom I was instantly harder for mom then even the hot little 16 year old daughter. Later i would see her in her bathing suit as she accompanied us to the local pool as I felt like King of the Hill as the escort of these two beautiful women. The dad was similar to the father in this story and often wondered if all the flirting the mom had done would end up like this story. Sadly the mom and dad ended up divorcing and the daughter went on a binder of rebelliousness doing drugs and went way to wild and caused us to breakup as then she went to sleeping with any guy around especially if he had drugs. So I never got to have this as i always wanted and the closest I got was when i was screwing one older lady and the sister had discovered us and as round one was finishing the sister slid in bed with us asking for her turn and as the first sister just smiled stroking me asking me if i was ok with it as it had always been their fantasy to sleep with the same guy. So I got to have my first of many threesomes and got very little sleep over he next day as i always had one sister in bed or one getting me ready to go another round with the other. Isn't it every man's dream to have this

HOT SHIT! Well done. ⭐⭐⭐⭐⭐

they're both, as you've painted them, walking dreams...no jealousy, equal sharing...

tho had hoped at least the mom would have a proper adult woman's muff...would have been too much to hope daughter was down with going natural

easy 5, and fave

a dream come true!...

ok...

Hot. Volcanic hot. Hades hot.......... I think it would be fair to say I enjoyed your work. Thank you.( I can't believe someone commented " ok " !

NICE good read

There's only one perfect thing that's missing from this storyline........ a 2nd, maybe a 3rd chapter please

A great story. Loved it.

Fun story. Being a husband myself, I would have liked it better if the husband was an able and active participant in this story. He doesn’t need to be inadequate or a terrible lover for this story to be hot. He could have showed up while Theresa and Michael were having sex and to Michael’s surprise and embarrassment and confusion shown to be quite adequate and a willing and capable participant. But still a great read. Thanks for sharing.

WHEN IS CHAPTER 2 COMING OUT ?

So fucking hot! I just wished there was more when the three of them were in bed!! Five stars and a favorite point!

GREAT STORY!! With a perfect ending, nothing like keeping it in the family for all to share.