My Life as a Slut - The Beginning

I have been involved in many brief or "casual" sexual encounters with both men and women for most of my adult life. I have decided to begin cataloging them here. I am now in my early 40s and living full time as a dedicated submissive of my beautiful, but often demanding, Mistress. This journey began with years of curiosity driven, wanton behavior that slowly flowered into full blown fetish & kink. My first step down this path would begin before my 30th birthday.

As I recall I was on the tail end of lifeless marriage of 7 years and in my late 20s. A few years before I met my (then) wife, I was working a menial job downtown as an usher at the local movie theater. I was around 20 and Eric was a little older than I was, but not by much, he was larger too, but not muscular per say. He was black skinned, with a roundish head, strong hands and apparently, found me very attractive. First, he befriended me and then started dropping hints about how he wasn't into girls, eventually he just flat out asked to give me head. I found it kind of amusing and stayed friends with him even after I declined. Once he literally offered me a few hundred dollars in cash to blow me. I was tempted but chickened out. We eventually lost touch and I didn't hear from him for years.

One day, after my then-wife asked for divorce, I was feeling lost and I reached out to him, probably from some misguided sense of needing to be wanted. He snatched up the opportunity to meet me and within a week I was driving to his apartment late one night. Although no one had said so, we both knew what was going to happen... I remember specifically thinking to myself in the car ride over that another man's cock would be in my mouth for the first time in less than an hour.

He was wearing black gym shorts and a white t-shirt when I arrived at his apartment, with nothing underneath but a noticeably large bulge pushing through his pants. He gave me a soda from his fridge, we chatted for a while, I don't remember about what, I'm sure neither of us cared. After a few minutes we were sitting down in his typical, sparse, bachelor type apartment. Complete with black leather couch, matching loveseat, TV, gaming system of some kind, basic kitchen, etc... it all felt very college dorm type. I don't recall exactly how, but the next memory I have is being on my knees, he was seated on the couch with his legs spread and his hard cock reaching out of the top his shorts.

I was concerned I couldn't get it into my mouth without my teeth scraping it, it was so much thicker than I imagined it would be. I had never seen a black man's cock before, but I instantly fell in love with it. I remember how strange it was to hold a dick that wasn't my own. I remember being inches from his mushroom shaped cock head and noticing the way the slit on the tip kind of wrinkled up and back into itself. My own slit was more of a straight line, like a miniature vagina, I remember thinking that all cocks must be slightly different. I remember the soft scent of Irish Spring soap masking the musk of crotch and feeling the weight of his large round balls. I started licking the sides of his shaft, tasting dick for the first time, working my way back to the tip and then feeling the cockhead slip into my mouth and hearing him sigh in relief as the boy he chased 8 years prior was now looking back up at him with his mouth stuffed wide with his black cock.

The thing no one tells you about giving head for the first time is that it really is actual work. There is a stiff, uncomfortable cock lodged in your mouth, often bumping the back of your throat, you are struggling to breathe while keeping your teeth clear of the rod being shoved in your face hole and the man on the other end is just having a great fucking time. I've been given hundreds of blowjobs, so when I put all that dick past my lips it was a strange to not be experiencing the mind melting sensation of a warm mouth wrapped around my own cock. In place of the instant pleasure Eric was enjoying my jaw was starting to get sore, I choked a bit and gagged as I tried to go down as far as I could. My hand and neck were getting tired from bobbing up and down and stroking his shaft. I couldn't believe I had been sucking his dick for like 5 minutes and he hadn't cum. I would have blown a load in 90 seconds if I had gotten such enthusiastic head, but what I didn't know yet was that Eric never came from oral. I spent 20 minutes giving my first blowjob with a smiling black man watching me desperately choke down his dick. He caressed my head, chuckled a bit and told me he wished it would never end.

I had the growing concern that I must be some sort of oral failure and started to give up hope that I could finish him off. He sensed my rhythm had changed and he told me to slow down and enjoy myself. So that's what I did, I spent more time on his plump head which relieved some pressure on my jaw and gave him long strokes with my hand. After a while he pulled his cock out of my mouth and presented his balls, Eric loved his balls sucked, and I spent longer than I wanted to massaging each one individually in mouth before he pointed his cock back at my lips, a not-so-subtle request to resume pleasuring his prick.

I don't remember exactly how, but it became clear it was time for him to take my virginity. We ended up on his bed where he laid on his back, he had me lube his cock, first with my mouth and then with a small bottle or tube of some kind. He then proceeded to relax and watch as I tried to sit down on his waiting pole. He was rock hard and placed both hands around my hips as I would take just a fraction of him and then retreat, repeating the process and rocking my asshole around head of his cock, dipping it in and out and trying to go a little deeper each time until suddenly, half of his hard, slippery cock ripped right up inside of me.

I froze. His cock felt l so much different than I imagined. It was unforgivably hard and persistently thick. His grip on my hips became much firmer, claiming his prize; fresh virgin booty. We both knew I wasn't in control anymore when he looked me right in the eyes, I stared back kind of helplessly and whimpered a little. That's when he started slowly fucking me, just steady half-length strokes. I slumped over him, laying my head on his shoulder allowing him to stretch me open, it felt amazing and terrible at the same time. I imagined how my ass must have felt gripping his pulsing shaft, how much he must be enjoying sinking a little deeper in me with each stroke. Focusing on his enjoyment helped me push through my own pain.

Still lodged inside of me, he rolled us over so we were both on our side in a spooning position, he told me it would be easier that way, but no matter the position his cock was just fucking big, I was being stretched, my poor ass felt a constant, dull burning sensation as he pumped in and out of my hole. Then he started pushing in deep, I began hearing my own muffled grunts filling the pillows. Soon our sideways position had naturally evolved into me laying flat on my stomach with 225lbs of man grinding my ass deeper into his mattress. Whispering in my ear he told me how tight my smooth ass felt, one arm wrapped around my body the other locked around my neck and head. I gave into the pain, it hurt a little less now, but my body was still fighting his steady invasion. He fucked my ass with deep, short strokes, never to fast. I looked back at him with one eye and told him with resignation "You know you like it more that I'm struggling". He was momentarily taken back but laughed back softly and pushed a deep, firm thrust as he said "Yes I do".

That's when the pace picked up, I didn't realize it at the time, but I had acknowledged I was struggling without asking for him to stop and by doing so gave him permission to let go. I got fucked. I felt his weight slap up against my ass which now felt warm, almost in a good way but I still random thrusts would send sharp pains through my body as he probed my guts. Soon I was stretched even further by the base of his shaft as he started to bottom me out. His dick never really stopped hurting me but I started caring about it less, I guess mentally I went to a different place. He shifted up and pulled me on all fours by my shoulders, in response I opened up my hips by spreading my knees wider. I was getting fucked up the ass like some dumb bitch and it made me feel like a filthy slut. I loved it.

"You want the nut?!" A question that felt more like a statement of fact.

I must have made some sort of moan or noise of approval, not that it would have mattered much, he was going to cum deep inside my virgin butt whether I wanted him to or not. The next few moments were intoxicating, there is no feeling as deliciously helpless as being on the receiving end of a man fucking his cum into your body. I was pressed face first into the pillow, I tried to arch my back to present my ass as much as I could for him as he shuddered, moaned and filled my once virgin rear with his sticky load. He then thrust and held, grunted, thrust again and held a little longer before and repeated this process before finally letting his softening cock slowly slip out of my worn asshole.

I collapsed.

Showering alone in his bathroom, I distinctly remember his cum spilling out of me onto the shower floor with a "splat" sound, I was embarrassed, but oddly proud. I was sore... but in a good way. When I got out, still wet with a towel wrapped around me, he ripped it off and slapped my rump and told me "That ass was perfect", I nearly blushed.

I saw him one more time. He never did cum in my mouth even though I begged him to do so and gave it my best effort, giving him a very long, enthusiastic blowjob while he watched anime during our next and final meeting. He told me I could try as long as I wanted but he doesn't cum from head. I was determined to prove him wrong and earn my mouthful of nut, but eventually I just wore out. Reluctantly I gave up but my submissive tendencies would not allow me to leave him hanging, so I presented my smooth round ass for more punishment. That night ended with me struggling to take his cock while my nose and left cheek were mashed into his dirty carpet, I was whimpering with each thrust. Just the way he liked it. A few minutes before he came something magical did happen though, I opened up. He felt amazing, nothing hurt and I was all but begging for him to fuck me. That window only lasted about 30 seconds, but after that, I knew I would always want more.

I tried later in life to hook up, but he just kind of let me slide, never saying no but not eager to make it happen either. He still had young white men on his social media accounts and I'm sure they all have their own stories of how Eric took their virginity.